Help me Tom Cruise!

May 17, 2010 | John West

When your NFL Team is 3-12, you are hoping for your team to loss the last week of the season, so they get a higher draft pick, and increase their chances of being good sooner.  I am at that stage for the Orioles.  It’s a week and a half before Memorial Day, and I am THERE.  I was there a little while ago, but hadn’t said it out loud yet.  It is not a therapeutic as I would have hoped.

I don’t need Sabermetrics to complicate my life.  The Orioles have the worst record in baseball.  It is really that simple, so lets look ahead, again, to keep our heads out of the here and now……..because the here and now stinks.

With the MLB draft less than 1 month away, I am going to spend some time talking about our options.  The Orioles pick 3rd overall in each round, except round two which would have been somewhere around the 38th pick.  We lost that pick by signing our closer for the next two years Mike Gonzalez.  (Sorry… it hurts me too.)

The Nationals pick first, the Pirates pick second, and then the Orioles.  It has long been believed that the Nationals were going to take 17 year old baseball prodigy Bryce Harper.  This kid is like Matt Wieters.  Let me say that again, he is like Matt Wieters.  Only 17!!!  If any team in baseball could take Matt Wieters with a draft pick, they would ALL do it.  Bryce Harper is playing for the College of Southern Nevada.  He is batting .408 with 23 home runs and 68 RBI’s.  He is the clear number 1 pick.

Bill Ladson of is reporting that the Nationals are not sure if they are going to take Bryce Harper.  As the baby on the Etrade ad says…..”Milk-a-whaaaat?!”  The Nationals are looking at Ole Miss LHP Drew Pomeranz or RHP Jameson Taillon.  These two are the best college pitcher and the best high school pitcher in the draft.  Nice picks, but not if you pass on Bryce Harper.

I am putting all major religions, heck any minor one’s too, on notice right now.  My worship is up for hire.  Please let the Nationals take someone other than Bryce Harper.  I am talking to you Scientologists.  I feel as if my “Thetans” are ready to be……whatever Thetans do.  Seriously, I have a soul ready to serve.

I know the Pirates won’t pick him.  “Sign-ability” is the draft term for being cheap.  The Pirates will have sign-ability issues with Bryce Harper and won’t take him.

As a side shot at the Orioles, if they draft Bryce Harper, than Matt Wieters could take a month to learn how to play first base, just like Nolan Reimold…