Sports can be a dirty business, especially when there’s Friday Mud

October 15, 2010 | Drew Forrester

Lots to cover today as Friday comes around and I provide you with another exciting edition of the area’s most popular blog, “Friday Mud”.

You won’t see this kind of insight, analysis, wit and community contribution anywhere else on the web in these parts.  Go ahead and look at the cyber-efforts of our competitors today and you’ll find out what Jenn Sterger saw first-hand.  They’re all limp.

I’m offering a different approach today with Friday Mud.  We’re going to do it with pictures and video, mostly, although I’m happy to report we won’t be showing you any Brett Favre photos in this edition.

Have a great weekend.

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> With all due respect to Favre, he gets let off the hook today in my “Jerk of the Week” nomination.  I work on a Friday-to-Thursday calendar in the JOTW voting, so here’s this week’s winner.  It’s the head coach of the Arundel team that called a time-out with 21 seconds left in the 2nd quarter with his team ahead, 41-0, at Glen Burnie.  Don’t take it personally, coach.  You’re there to win games, not friends.

>  So at the quarter mark of the NFL season, who’s the MVP of the league?  Forget about numbers for a second.  Don’t give me a bunch a stats.  Tell me, right now, what player in the league has done the most for his team so far through four games (and some have played five)…well, I’ll tell you who it is since you don’t know.  It’s this guy right here.

> Here are your respective AL and NL MVP’s in the upcoming championship series’.  In the NL, this guy will be the reason why his team wins.  Gee, that’s a shock, huh?  And in the AL, I’ll go with a little bit of an off-the-radar screen pick and go with him, right here.

>  So there’s this convention for people in the mental health industry and Dr. Smith is a noted psychiatrist who serves as the main speaker.  During the question and answer session, a woman in a Steelers jersey raises her hand and asks a question:  ”Doctor, is there one tried and true method you use to first diagnose whether or not someone has mental illness?”  The doctor says, “Yes, indeed, there is.  Come on up young lady and I’ll give you what I call the “Dummy test”.  The woman comes out into the main aisle and confidently strolls to the head table in her Hines Ward #86 Steelers jersey.  The doctor says, “You start the testing process by asking the easiest question you can.  If the correct answer isn’t provided within 5 seconds, the person you’re dealing with is a complete idiot and probably needs further testing to determine the true impact of their intelligence deficiency.”  He looks down at his notebook and reads the question to the woman:  ”A famous explorer made three sailing trips around-the-world in the 1400′s. Tragically, he died during one of those trips.  Which trip did he die on?”  The woman in the Steelers jersey frowns and says to the Doctor, “Look, I’m not telling you how to do your test.  But I’m horrible at world history.  You wouldn’t happen to have another example would you?”

> A bird in a tree whispered this to me this week.  I sure hope he’s wrong.  But I have to say, he’s “in the know” with regard to one of the teams I mention.  The Orioles are evidently interested in A.J. Burnett and Nick Johnson, providing that New York chips in a substantial portion of the $45 million Burnett is owed in New York.  The Yankees would like either Nolan Reimold or Felix Pie as part of the deal.  OK, let me handle this in the nicest way possible.  If Andy MacPhail brings Nick Johnson here, he should have his GM card permanently revoked.  Nick Johnson makes Jared Gaither look like a picture of perfect health.  Memo to MacPhail:  Nick Johnson can’t play when he’s on the disabled list.  I get the whole Burnett thing, especially if the Yankees pay for some of that $45 million.  It’s the same deal as a year ago when the O’s got Kevin Millwood.  They need a veteran starter.  And Burnett has family here, so he probably wouldn’t object to the move.  But Nick Johnson?  Really?  I don’t buy it.  The Orioles aren’t going to bring Nick Johnson here.  They’re not.  Well, they better not.

> Someone asked me this question yesterday and I thought it was very thought provoking.  Is there ONE person who could immediately make the Orioles a playoff team in 2011 if the team could acquire him?  I gave it some thought and I think there is, actually.  I’m not sure what it would take to get him, but I bet this man could get the Orioles back into the post-season next year.

> Here’s the guy who catches the game-winning TD pass with 1:51 left to give his team a 23-20 win on Sunday in the Ravens/Patriots game.  Remember, I’m already 5-0 in predicting the outcome of Ravens’ games.  That’s right, my record is unblemished thus far.  In other words:  I know what I’m talking about.

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