April 01, 2009 | Keith Melchior

I heard someone today talking about 2011 and the promising future. Try this analogy.  You make $25 bucks an hour at a desk job with no future.  It’s like waiting for the perfect woman to dump the millionaire idiot she’s with and actually think you have a chance with her.  FANTASY!!!

The Orioles are dead in the water, and will be until they spend cash for some of the proven free agents to plug the many holes they have on this team. Their track record with their minor league pitching prospects have been abysmal. Quick, name 3 starting pitchers who came through the minor league system in the last 10 years that made an impact on this team and amounted to anything special.  OK, name 2. OK name 1. You can’t!!!  

 And why the hell are people comparing the Orioles to TAMPA? They were perennial losers who caught lighting in a bottle last year. In the off season, Boston and New York saw to it that was not going to happen to them again this season. You think in 2011 those two teams will actually allow the Orioles to improve and stand alone atop the AL East for years to come? Guess again.  In 2011 EVERYONE on this team will be 2 years older in real life and 5 years older in a pro athlete’s life, which means Brian Roberts and Nick Markakis may not continue to be rock solid even in the middle of their long term contracts. If Adam Jones hasn’t turned into the solid 5 tool player as he was advertised, then where does that leave the team? 

When, when, when, is all I hear these days….It’s all a crap shoot. Nobody knows for sure what will happen. So, how about using IF instead of when?  IF the minor league pitching prospects develop as planned, IF Pie, Jones, Wieters, Guthrie, and Matusz grow into rock solid players. IF they sign a top notch power hitter that pitchers fear. IF the fan base returns.  IF the Yankees and Red Sox don’t improve themselves, IF we were in another division. Lots of IFs out there, but no guaranteed WHENs

And that is why those of you who drink the Orange Kool-Aid and choose to  remain patient until 2011 will have your hearts broken…yet AGAIN.

April Fool!!!