Breaking news: Fenway’s Green Monster admitted to Boston hospital

April 20, 2009 | Drew Forrester

(BOSTON) — The famed Green Monster at Boston’s Fenway Park has been admitted to Mary Our Queen hospital in Cambridge after a collision earlier today with Baltimore Orioles’ outfielder Felix Pie.

The Monster is in serious but stable condition with broken ribs, a punctured lung and a partially ruptured spleen.  The incident occurred in the 7th inning of today’s 12-1 Red Sox win over the Orioles when Pie — attempting to collect a long fly ball off the bat of David Ortiz — ran full-steam into the base of the wall and sent a shattering sound throughout the ballpark.

“It was a nasty collision,” Pie said afterwards.  “But you know, baseball can be a physical game and sometimes someone gets in the way.  As I was trying to find the ball, I said to myself, ‘it’s either him or me and I’m not going to let it be me’ so I just kept on going.”

It was originally believed the Monster had the wind knocked out of it, but later on in the inning it started spitting up blood and doctors immediately called for an ambulance to haul the Monster away.

“There is significant damage to the Monster’s infrastructure,” said Boston team doctor Joseph Nositall.  “This was a very serious collision and the injuries were not apparent until 20 minutes or so afterwards.”

The Red Sox have placed the Monster on the 15-day disabled list.

The Orioles have requested that Pie take an extra 45-minutes of outfield shag practice tomorrow when the O’s return home to face the White Sox.

“We don’t have the revenue the Red Sox have,” said an O’s source after the game.  “We can’t afford Felix to put our wall in the hospital.  We don’t have the money to replace our centerfield fence.”