Brilliant Fantasy Drafting & Adding An Hour

August 16, 2007 |

I have good news and bad news. If you like listening to Andrew and me on Saturday morning then the good news is we’re adding an hour to the show.  Starting this week we’ll be on from 8am-11am.

If you find Andrew and I repulsive then, of course, the bad news is we’re adding an hour to the show!

I’d like to tell you that we added the hour due to overwhelming demand on the part of the listeners.  Except I’d be lying.  Truth is, Andrew just wanted an excuse to get out of his house earlier so that he didn’t have to deal with his three small kids and I figured that by having to get up an hour earlier maybe I’d make Friday nights my "sober night".

Actually, with football right around the corner, Andrew and I plan to do a lot more game analysis for both college and pro.  Especially AGAINST THE SPREAD.  We’re both pretty good at handicapping and think we might help some of you do a bit better this year than you have in year’s past.  We’ll see.

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WNST FANTASY FOOTBALL DRAFT REVIEW

A couple of nights ago WNST held its Fantasy Football Draft.  All I can tell you is that fantasy drafts are not the most exciting events in the world.  Well, maybe to some guys. Ken Zalis and Thyrl Nelson freak out for this stuff.  They live for it.  I respect and admire that. 

However, for me, a football fantasy draft is a lot like sitting in a laundry mat watching your clothes dry. BORING!

The first three or four rounds are almost a foregone conclusion.  There’s so much information out there about who to draft and when to draft them that’s it’s pretty much a "by the book" procedure. Like observing traffic court.

Unless, of course, you’re me and you take the Packers defense with your ninth pick.  The Packers DEFENSE?  WHAT?  I must’ve read about them somewhere or I was tired or drunk or all of the above.  I also took the Cowboys tight end Jason Witten a bit earlier than maybe I should’ve.  Guys kept yelling out "Leonard Pope! Take Leonard Pope!"  I didn’t listen.  I can only pray that Pope breaks an ankle. 

Which brings up another problem with fantasy sports…

It teaches us to hate our fellow man.  I’ve got a guy in the Fighting Ungers Fantasy Baseball league who not only makes insulting trade offers, he pilfered Chone Figgins when I made the mistake of placing him on waivers because he was batting .121 at the time.  Figgins is now batting ,342 and I ask the Lord every day if he can find it within himself to give Figgins a severe muscle tear and his idiot owner a painful skin rash. 

Anyway, here’s who I drafted and my highly scientific reasons for doing so…

1. Brian Westbrook (10)- Being a fan of the New York Giants means hating the Eagles. I figure by drafting Westbrook with my first pick he’s a lock to break a leg. That helps the Jints.

2. Torry Holt (23)- Seems like a friendly guy and I had him last year.

3. Donald Driver (42)- By this time the only starting running backs left were Ahman Green and Jamal Lewis.  Besides, every time I see his name I think of Donald Duck.

4. Deion Branch (55)- Was thinking of Cliff Branch. Oops.

5. Eli Manning (74)- If I didn’t draft a Giant my brother would get pissed at me and Shockey and Burress were already gone. 

6. LenDale White (87)- I like to draft fat running backs three rounds before the experts at ESPN say you’re supposed to.

7. Jason Witten (106)- I looked at the cheat sheet of someone sitting near me.

8. Alex Smith (119)- Thought I got lucky and WR Steve Smith was overlooked.

9. Green Bay "D" (138)- I’m mentally challenged.

10. Najeh Davenport (151)- I headlined a comedy gig in Davenport, Iowa.

11. Sinorice Moss (170)-  I figured he probably inherited his brother Randy’s skills. Then I remembered he’s Santana’s brother.

12. Stephen Gostkowski (183)- Couldn’t tell ya.

13. Eric Moulds (202)- Tommy Fungus was already taken.

14. Chris Baker (215)- Don’t know.  Not even sure what position he plays or what team he’s on.

15. Kevin Faulk (234)- Thought he was great as Columbo.

16. Giants "D"- (247)- Rob Long convinced me that Lawrence Taylor was making a comeback.

 Thoughts? Comments? email us at fightingungers@wnst.net


 

 

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