MacPhail is on the clock. His “Orlando trip” better end well…

December 08, 2010 | Drew Forrester

I remember the scene near the end of ‘A Few Good Men’ when Jack Nicholson is under fire from Tom Cruise and Nicholson tries to throw Cruise off his scent by saying, “Please tell me you have something more than this. Please tell me you have something more than foot lockers and underwear…”

And that, I assume, is what most baseball fans in Baltimore (the 3,208 still remaining who REALLY care, like me, about the off-season happenings) are saying to Andy MacPhail today as the winter meetings chug towards their conclusion tomorrow.

“Please tell us you have more, Andy. Please tell us you have more than a Monday trade for a 3rd baseman who hits the ball a long way but strikes out more times in a season than he shaves in a year.”

Begging, naturally, won’t do any good, so saying “please” doesn’t rattle Andy’s cage at all.

But it is worth saying again, because we were all counting on some major developments in Orlando this week:

Please, Andy, tell us you have more than just the Mark Reynolds deal.

There have been lots of players available throughout the last 10 days and there are still plenty in the unemployment line. This much is true: The Orioles have BARELY improved themselves so far in this off-season and by week’s end, we are all assuming most of the really good players will have a new home.

I’m not going to sit here and list the players I think the Orioles should go after because my list of players would include guys who would actually make the team REALLY competitive and we know – given what we’ve seen from MacPhail’s efforts in the last three winters – that he’s not going to spend the money necessary to bring Carl Crawford, Adrian Beltre and Adam Dunn to Baltimore.

So I’ll just say the same thing I’ve said every December for the last three years.

Fix the team, Andy.

That’s all.

Fix the team.

Asking you – Andy – to spend money is like asking Justin Bieber to get a haircut. It’s not happening anytime soon.

But the team in Baltimore must be fixed and you – Andy – are the guy responsible for fixing it.

Don’t fix it next year. That’s not good enough. In fact, if you don’t fix it this winter, you shouldn’t be around next winter to try and fix it in Baltimore, but that’s a story for another day.

Don’t give us any more excuses.

Don’t cry about the payroll differential in the American League East.

We’ve cried enough about the way the team has played over the last 13 years, we’re all cried out here in Baltimore.

Just fix the team.

(This, by the way, is probably the exact same blog I’ve written in 2008, 2009 and 2010. Someone will no doubt make a comment to the extent of: “Same old s**t from you, Drew. You just have to keep beating up the team, don’t you?” Answer: Not really. I don’t have to beat them up if they fix it. Last spring, we all beat the Ravens up because their wide receiver corps wasn’t any good. Guess what? They fixed it. Or tried to, at least. Problem solved.)

Now, as Dr. Dre said, “Back to the lecture at hand…”

If the Orioles don’t get a real first baseman this week and they wind up on Scrub Patrol with Lyle Overbay, as an example, then MacPhail gets the warning flag raised outside of his office.

Ten days ago, these players were available:  Adam Dunn, Paul Konerko, Derrek Lee, Carlos Pena and Adam LaRoche.

As of 11:30 am this morning, only two of them (Lee and LaRoche) remain.

Adrian Gonzalez was nabbed by the Red Sox.  They needed a first baseman and they made it happen.

We need a first baseman in Baltimore and all we’re apparently doing is drinking coffee and asking about the family.

Now, in fairness, the Orioles have been in hot pursuit of Derrek Lee and thought they had a deal in place earlier this week but Lee suddenly went missing while he “pondered” things.  That, of course, doesn’t mean the Orioles couldn’t have turned up their pursuit of Lee, but we all know that’s not Andy’s style.  He’s the only guy in the world who actually enjoys waiting for the ketchup to leave the bottle.

So we will all just do what Andy does, I suppose.  We’ll wait.  We’ll wait around to see if he actually does something this week besides what he’s already done.

Let’s all hope he DOES have more in store for us.

Please tell us you have more, Andy.

Please tell us you didn’t go down there this week to just give us Mark Reynolds.