Orioles Warm Stove

February 12, 2012 | Tom Federline

Is the baseball stove even on? I know last week Dan Donesquat had my oven on fire. In the matter of a few days, I had heard the Orioles had hired Brady Anderson back (to teach how NOT to get caught?), let Jeremy Guthrie go (only reliable arm they had) and were talking to Manny ‘Steroid Hair” Ramirez for a comeback. After the Ramirez announcement – I tuned out. I actually turned off the radio when I heard “Duquette talks with Ramirez.”  The first words out of my mouth were – are you kiddin’ me? Have to admit, I embellished that statement and even made myself laugh. Warm stove, hot stove, or no stove, just what is going on?

Am I quick on the trigger with my play on the O’s new GM’s name, Dan Donesquat? I attempted an Opening Day line-up and realized there really was no apparent DH. The former Boston BlowSox GM has made some moves, so he has done…………….. something. The O’s have 40 some guys claiming to be pitchers. I guess he is banking on fresh new arms, the farm system to pick up the slack and surprises galore. So let’s just say, it “appears” as if our new GM has done squat. I’m an O’s fan. I have orange kool-aid year round in my kitchen cabinets. But haven’t the orange faithful been down this road way to many times?

Brady is coming back! Director of Player Developement and Conditioning. Here I go again – Are you kiddin’ me? (laugh). So now the boys can learn how to take steroids, pay the right testing lab and NOT get caught. I was a Brady Anderson fan. It’s a shame he earned his way to get thrown in with 75% of all the other steroid using athletes in the 90’s.  Are the O’s resurging with the leagues oldest lead-off hitter? The O’s need one.


Wait a minute Donesquat I get it – so when you sign Ramirez and thank him for putting you on the map back in Boston – he will be the antithesis to Brady on steroid use. Ramirez can teach how to get caught on juice when you get greedy. Or will Ramirez be here to teach hair care? Maybe Ramirez will be the DH? Ok, I have to stop. No steroid hair.

Jeremy Guthrie gone. I get he is coming up on the last year of his contract. Had another “hard luck” year. A little arm soreness, a friend of the long ball, age, need to change the gaurd, etc. Who was the O’s “go to” guy these last few years? Who ate up innings with “quality starts”? Who was the only guy on that pitching staff, you could say when it was his turn in the starting rotation, “At least we have a shot tonight?” I guess you are a gambling man Dan Donesquat. We are anxious to see. And good ole Jeremy Guthrie, my advice to you is, you’re just “Gonna Walk and Don’t Look Back” – (Peter Tosh and Mic Jagger – great duet). Good luck in Rockies land, you deserve it.

Opening Day line-up (proposed as of today): 1. Robert Andino – 2b (Roberts is done). 2. J.J. Hardy – SS (Thanks you Andy Didfail). 3. Adam Jones – CF (our hope). 4. Chris Davis – (Designated Hitter – found ’em). 5. Nolan Reimaold – RF (please make it this year). 6. Matt Weiters – C (solid). 7. Wilson Betemit – 3b (Dan Duquette safety). 8. Mark Reynolds – 1b (will he top 200 K’s this year). Endy Chavez – RF (who?). Opening Day Starter – Jake Arietta (our hope). I also heard we got a Tippy Martinez clone in this Tsuyoshi Wada (who?) Injured Reserve – Nick Markakis Future HOF (1/3 of year),  Brian Roberts (indefinite /let go?).

Injured Reserve – Markakis’ abdominal surgery may be more than he bargained for. Hopefully not. Last year Ryan Zimmerman from the Washington Nationals, had a similar injury and played in 101 games. Grant it, on a different timetable. Zimmerman probably coasted during the 2011 off-season and spring training, then became injured beginning of April. We take our stomach muscles and knees for granted. Brain Roberts is a mess. A self inflicted bat to the head, a head first slide into first? What aren’t they telling us?

It finally turned cold. I need something on the stove and in the fireplace to keep me warm, preferably hot. It sure isn’t the Orioles. Actually, the nut ball fan that I am, I believe the O’s have a good base. I thought they did last year and the year before that and the year before that. I would love to take back my nickname for the new O’s GM and praise his rolling of the dice. But the story is all to familiar. We all know the trouble starts at the top with Mr. Please Free the Birds Angelos. Maybe Dan’s hands are tied. Maybe Dan was just tired of being re-tired. Maybe Baltimore O’s fans are due for a few surprises. Maybe I’ve already started drinking to much orange kool-aid.

End on a positive – The cartoon bird is back! And I do like the 20 years at Camden Yards site, here’s the link http://orioles.mlb.com/bal/camdenyards20/index.jsp .