Raining on Long Island and in South Africa

June 18, 2009 | Drew Forrester

It’s raining cats and dogs at Bethpage Black and they’re under a weather delay right now at the U.S. Open.  Word coming out of Long Island is that it’s likely they won’t play again today.  70% of the field hasn’t even made it to the first tee yet.  It’s going to be a LONG weekend of golf…and there’s gobs of bad weather on the horizon over the next three days for the whole Eastern seaboard.

It’s raining goals in South Africa, where the U.S. is losing to Brazil, 3-0, with 20 minutes to go in their Group B Confederations Cup match. 

With no U.S. Open to watch, I’m tuned into that mess of a game and the U.S. looks lost and completely out of sorts. 

Brazil’s better, of course, but this 3-0 ass kicking is hopefully not symbolic of the difference in quality between the two national soccer teams. 

Wait, the U.S. just played a ball into the penalty area.  A dangerous chance.  Never mind, no one read the play.  Wow.

Ten minutes ago, Clint Dempsey got one-two’d near the outside of the penalty area and the Brazilians used Dempsey’s napping to go up 3-0.

Conor Casey is in the game for the United States.  A billy goat would be more effective.  How in THE hell is that guy one of the leading scorers in MLS?  He doesn’t run.  Jozy Altidore is supposedly our next offensive hope.  Well, from what I see, he has half of that mastered so far.  His play is offensive.  

At this stage, Brazil is just trying to hold the ball and not get hurt. 

The U.S., it appears, is happy with the same result.  

Robinho just did more with the ball in 11 seconds than I’ve seen Conor Casey and Jozy Altidore do in 15 minutes.

Oh, by the way, Brazil is up a man after a U.S. red card in the 57th minute.  To be fair, they should sit three of their players for the final 15 minutes of this one.  I doubt the U.S. would score, but it might get interesting.

Clint Dempsey just lost the ball again at midfield and fell down like Lee Harvey Oswald when Jack Ruby shot him.  Dempsey would be better served playing for Italy with all the diving he does out there.  

This is painful.

I think I’ll put in one of Ethan’s “Thomas The Train” DVD’s.