Vomiting in Tokyo…

November 06, 2007 | Nestor Aparicio

So, I’m watching the Ravens on a 5-inch screen in Tokyo

Right off the bat, even as bad as it’s raining there, I’d MUCH rather be there than watching Tony Kornheiser annoy the hell outta me.

But it does look like it really sucks!

Kornheiser is talking Steelers karma? Who the hell is he kidding?

And you knew it would only take about three minutes for the ESPN crew to zoom in on some idiot who’s been drinking since Saturday with his shirt off and a Terrible Towel being waved! Gotta love Pittsburgh – it’s nothing if not predictable.

I’m sitting in my hotel room in Shibuya, Tokyo on the 34th floor (and the weather is kinda crappy here, too!).

We’re only gonna see three quarters of action. Our bus leaves for Narita Airport at 12:50 local time. I was kinda hoping to podcast the rest at the airport, but that’s not a reality.

So, there’s a chance I could fly all the way home – 12 hours nonstop to Dulles – without knowing the outcome. And our cellphones don’t work at all in Tokyo!

It’s been a very interesting trip!

Only the Steelers would have throwback jerseys that are as ugly as the current Browns jersey!

OK…onto the gamelog…

(10:55 a.m. Tuesday Tokyo time)

What the hell is McNair thinking with the football. That was an EMBARRASING turnover, especially in these weather conditions where field position is gonna be the entire gamestory!

Kicking field goals is gonna be a bitch!

Bart Scott’s ESPN introductions were classic!

Insult to injury: Trevor Pryce not only misses Ben Roethlisberger, but Terrell Suggs takes a cheap shot on the backside. It’s already ugly in Pittsburgh…

You start to wonder if ANYTHING is gonna go right for the Ravens in 2007!

This has potential to be a really ugly evening, considering they’ll also be showing Terry Bradshaw, Mean Joe Greene and company from the 1970’s Steelers championships teams. I hated them then – even before they kicked the Colts’ asses twice in ’75 and 76!

My nfl.com broadcast of the game via the internet just bonked out again! It’s a VERY, VERY unreliable service thus far. I missed part of Derrick Mason’s introductions, but I’m just wondering if I even WANT to see this game, based on what I’ve seen so far…

Who is James Harrison? And when Ed Reed is coughing up the ball, we’re in a LOT of trouble!

Corey Ivy just interfered with Hines Ward. Now, Ray Lewis has a flag down. Mike Tirico has called this a “self-destructive” first quarter. Boy is that an understatement!

11:07 Tokyo time

Santonio Holmes just caught another touchdown pass. So far, it’s a nightmare playing out on my little 5-inch screen here. I can’t believe I actually thought the week off and emotions would bring out the best in the Ravens tonightday.

Clearly, I was wrong. This is a season on the brink of disaster at this point!

11:22 Tokyo time

Willis McGahee just got the first down – and then fumbled the ball. This might be the worst quarter in the history of Ravens football. This is an embarrassment!

My bus for the airport leaves in 90 minutes. I wish I would’ve taken the earlier bus at this point.

11:25

Now, to add insult to the injury, Terry Bradshaw is in the ESPN booth, surely soon to be piling on.

First play from scrimmage, and it’s 21-0! Derrick Martin looks like he’s never been on a football field.

The can’t tackle, they can’t hold onto the ball. They can’t cover. And they’ve turned the ball over three times which has led to 21 points.

Now, Bradshaw is slobbering on about how great Roethlisberger is.

The one thing I DON’T want to be subjected to right this second is Bradshaw yucking it up in the booth with these guys.

McNair just called for intentional grounding. It’s 3rd and 23 and they’re down 21-0 and Musa Smith is running a draw play.

I’m sure tomorrow on WNST, people will blame this loss on Brian Billick. As far as I can tell, it’s a total botch job by the entire team.

11:31

My internet connection just crapped out again, right around the point where Bradshaw was talking about Howard Cosell. The ads they’re feeding me on the internet broadcast are different than the ones you’re seeing in Baltimore.

I keep seeing the complete history of the New York Jets DVD. And the Matt Hasselback commercial talking about the language of football. The WORST one, no doubt, is when Bill Cowher talking about his daughter and their championship.

This has been the worst hour of self-inflicted agony I’ve ever subjected myself to from 8,000 miles away from home.
 
At least Gerome Sapp just sacked Big Ben. The first good thing I’ve seen happen tonight.

11:39

James Harrison looks like Lawrence Taylor tonight. McNair has just kicked the ball around one more time. McGahee almost turned it into a safety. And Tony Kornheiser has just anointed tonight a “Pittsburgh Steelers homecoming” game.

McNair just got a delay of game on the backside of this.

If I’m Billick, I’d put Boller in and just forget about it at this point. McNair stinks!

This is the lowest point in the Ravens’ history right now – right up there with the Detroit debacle of 2005 and the Jacksonville and Pittsburgh beatdowns of the mid-1990’s.

I have no idea what the final score is going to be, but this is about as bad as it gets midway through the second quarter.

The backups in the secondary look lost. The offensive line has been shaky. Penalties have mounted once again. The Ravens looks like a team in disarray. Coming unglued from endzone to endzone.

It would take a miracle turnover here to turn the tide for the Ravens.

And on a wet night, that could happen. But it looks like the offense might play until NEXT Sunday before they could drive 75 yards in these weather conditions.

11:48

Santonio Holmes just burned Derrick Martin again. It’s 28-0. It looks like they might be able to score 70 points throwing on Corey Ivy and Derrick Martin all night. Just goes to show you the value of quality cornerbacks. If you ever wonder why McAlister and Rolle make all of that money, well, tonight is your proof.

The Ravens just reverted to the days of Ike Booth and Donny Brady tonight. This is the 1996 nightmare Ravens secondary coming back to life, like a bad ghost.

I’m 8,000 miles and a 12-hour flight away from home in Tokyo watching the game on a 5-inch screen. At least I won’t have to wonder on the flight home who won.

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