Unlike the government (or the Steelers), the 15-7-0 cannot be shut down

September 30, 2013 | Glenn Clark

6. You know that car commercial where James Van Der Beek barges in and says “I don’t want your life”? Towson’s win over Stony Brook Saturday was a lot like that.

Just not enough drama.

But thankfully not too much drama. Like this.

7. I’m so thankful that Ohio State beat Wisconsin so I won’t have to worry much more about how to spell “Abbrederis”.

When you give this up on the final play of the first half, you deserve to lose, Wisconsin.

This is a quarterback throwing a block.

Here’s Brutus Buckeye clanging cymbals. Or is it clashing? Jesus I should have paid more attention in middle school band class.

This guy was the second most obnoxious Buckeyes fan at the game…

You already know who won the contest…

Elsewhere in the B1G, Minnesota and Iowa played for one of the most hallowed trophies in sports and I MUST HAVE IT.

8. I’ve always wondered if I’d see something in my life that would make me squeal “FABULOUS!” in an effeminate voice. Reggie Bush proved the answer was yes

Perhaps they could sell him to get the city out of bankruptcy?

Here’s Nick Fairley running in a touchdown. I assume they got a Richter Scale reading in the Motor City…

This Matt Stafford run/fumble/recovery/TD was a bit of a strange play call.

9. Jake Locker has Tennessee’s most important hips since some young man in Memphis in the 1950’s who loved peanut butter and banana sandwiches.

Nate Washington did a great job of making plays over defenders AND officials.

Geno Smith has done a remarkable job of looking EXACTLY like a Jets quarterback only a few weeks into his tenure.

Justin Hunter is talented.

10. What you are about to watch is a highlight from Barry Sanders Jr. I point that out because you might otherwise assume it was a guy without a suffix in his name.

Heisman ranking time.
1. Clemson QB Tahj Boyd
2. Oregon QB Marcus Mariota
3. Louisville QB Teddy Bridgewaterbuffalo
4. Dr. John Lee Football Hooker
5. The guy from Dancing With The Stars whose name you can’t pronounce that got with Kate Upton.

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