6. As someone who does their best to try to be funny, it has been a tough season considering there’s really no appropriate jokes to make about the guy who is going to run away with the Heisman Trophy next week and play for the national championship. So instead I’m just going to copy translations of “Duke sucks” in other languages and call it a day. Cool?
Islandic: Duke sjúga
Esperanto: duko sucks
Catalan: Duke és una merda
Slovenian: Duke je zanič
Hmong: Duke tsis zoo
Latvian: Duke sūkā
Ukranian: герцог смокче
Bengali: ডিউক sucks
Albanian: Duke sucks
And then in this language:
Also…ESPN somehow thinks this is going to get you excited for the title game. I think.
7. The Green Bay Packers are very much in the thick of the NFC North race despite not having a quarterback for the last month. Of course it could be worse. It’s true. They could have one of the Minnesota Vikings’ quarterbacks instead. Not having one is WAAAY better.
Here’s Johnny Jolly doing Johnny Jolly things.
Just like Atlanta drew it up.
8. Andy Dalton was spectacular in the Bengals’ win over the Colts in a matchup of first place AFC teams. Coincidentally, “Andy Dalton was spectacular” was on my Top 10 list of things I didn’t expect to write this weekend-just after “Will Ferrell goes 24 hours WITHOUT appearing on television as Ron Burgundy”.
Cincy won despite like 57 missed tackles on this play.
Marshall will be the Terps’ opponent after losing the Conference USA title game despite a guy showing up with a sign I made when I was 14.
This guy didn’t think this through. He wants to brag about how he watched the whole game shirtless, but in order to do that he’d have to admit he watched the whole Jets-Raiders game.
(Continued on Page 3…)