“The Reality Check” Week 7 NFL Power Rankings

October 19, 2011 | Glenn Clark

Glenn Clark’s Rankings…

32. Miami Dolphins (Last Week: 32)

Who do I see about getting my money back for having to watch them on Monday Night Football?

31. Indianapolis Colts (LW: 31)

Was Pierre Garcon in on the “Suck For Luck” bandwagon when he decided to give the ball to the Bengals last week?

30. Jacksonville Jaguars (LW: 27)

How in the hell did they ever win a game? (Not that I’m overlooking them or anything…)

29. St. Louis Rams (LW: 30)

Hey look, Brandon Lloyd plays there now! That means he’ll have a new couch from which to watch the playoffs.

28. Minnesota Vikings (LW: 28)

Christian Ponder is the quarterback now. I don’t see that being enough to start winning games. But what the hell do I know?

27. Denver Broncos (LW: 26)

TEEEEEEEEEEEEBBBBBBBBBBBBOOOOOOOOOOWWWWWWWW!!!!!

26. Arizona Cardinals (LW: 29)

I really didn’t think they would be this bad.

25. Carolina Panthers (LW: 23)

Cam Newton will want to be known more for winning than for endzone dances in the future.

24. Cleveland Browns (LW: 22)

Colt McCoy is not a starting quarterback for a NFL team that is going to win. Moving on…

23. Kansas City Chiefs (LW: 25)

I just hope Jackie Battle keeps piling up yards…you know…for fantasy reasons.

22. Seattle Seahawks (LW: 21)

They’d be better off if Tavaris Jackson can’t go.

21. Dallas Cowboys (LW: 19)

They deserve some credit for keeping things close in Foxborough, but this isn’t horseshoes. Or hand grenades.

20. Philadelphia Eagles (LW: 24)

The heat index on Andy Reid’s seat is now just “scorching” instead of “pure fire.”

19. Washington Redskins (LW: 11)

There’s nothing funnier than listening to DC fans go on about how much better they’ll be with John Beck at quarterback. Yes, the same John Beck.

18. New York Jets (LW: 17)

Rex Ryan has to be thanking his lucky stars that the Miami Dolphins are in the AFC East.

17. Tennessee Titans (LW: 15)

It’s nice to not HAVE to play your first round draft pick quarterback.

16. Chicago Bears (LW: 18)

They just have to hope teams will keep kicking to Devin Hester.

15. Oakland Raiders (LW: 12)

Trading a first and a second round pick for Carson Palmer and then playing him IMMEDIATELY? I assume Kyle Boller understands.

14. Atlanta Falcons (LW: 16)

They could use more big games from Michael Turner.

13. Houston Texans (LW: 10)

They’ll be okay when they get Andre Johnson back. They have to figure out how to win in the meantime.

12. Cincinnati Bengals (LW: 20)

Don’t look now, but Andy Dalton kinda looks like a quarterback.

11. New York Giants (LW: 14)

I will never understand how they lost to the Seahawks.

10. Buffalo Bills (LW: 7)

You can’t keep getting flagged at the end of games and think you’re going to win.

9. Tampa Bay Buccaneers (LW: 13)

They need LaGarrette Blount back, but they’ll be okay in the meantime apparently.

8. Pittsburgh Steelers (LW: 9)

They weren’t that impressive in beating the Jags Sunday. The part that matters is that they beat the Jags Sunday.

7. Detroit Lions (LW: 5)

They’re still a good team. They’re just not going to go 16-0. Hopefully there won’t be any more handshake controversies.

6. San Francisco 49ers (LW: 8)

Beat the Lions on the road? That’s significant.

5. San Diego Chargers (LW: 6)

A very dangerous threat to getting home field throughout the AFC playoffs.

4. New Orleans Saints (LW: 2)

The Sean Payton injury can’t be dismissed in judging this team.

3. Baltimore Ravens (LW: 5)

They have the best opportunity they’ve ever had to get to a Super Bowl in the John Harbaugh/Joe Flacco era.

2. New England Patriots (LW: 3)

They should have had more success against the Cowboys defense. No bother, they won anyway.

1. Green Bay Packers (LW: 1)

Even when they don’t necessarily try that hard in the second half they’re better than everyone else.

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