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“The Reality Check” Final Regular Season Power Rankings

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“The Reality Check” Final Regular Season Power Rankings

Posted on 02 January 2013 by Glenn Clark

Glenn Clark’s Rankings…

32. Kansas City Chiefs (32)

Okay, so no Josh McDaniels. Umm…Marty-ball?

31. Jacksonville Jaguars (30)

Mike Mularkey: “Are you sure you didn’t want to fire me?”

30. Arizona Cardinals (31)

I cannot believe they’re really considering hiring Todd Haley. OH.MY.GOD.

29. Oakland Raiders (29)

Now they get ready for their Super Bowl…the 40 yard dash at the NFL Combine.

28. Detroit Lions (28)

The problem for Jim Schwartz is that he’s a former defensive coach for a team that can’t play defense.

27. Philadelphia Eagles (27)

Yahoo! Sports’ Jason Cole tells us the Eagles could keep Michael Vick around if they hire Chip Kelly.

26. Cleveland Browns (26)

While the Browns’ first choice is the same Chip Kelly, no one’s first choice EVER has been the Cleveland Browns.

25. New York Jets (23)

QUARTERBACKS FOR SALE!!!!!!!!!!

24. Tennessee Titans (25)

Check back in with me in five minutes to confirm Mike Munchak still hasn’t been fired yet.

23. Buffalo Bills (24)

I think a Ken Whisenhunt/Russ Grimm combo would be a good fit there.

22. Tampa Bay Buccaneers (22)

Do you focus more on what went wrong? Or do you focus more on how to build off of seven wins?

21. Miami Dolphins (17)

At least they have a quarterback.

20. St. Louis Rams (18)

Are they as close as their record would make you believe?

19. San Diego Chargers (21)

If Peyton Manning isn’t in the AFC West, they win the thing and save Norv Turner again.

18. New Orleans Saints (16)

I’ll go ahead and assume they win 13 games next season.

17. Carolina Panthers (19)

By keeping Ron Rivera, they’d give up potential “most desirable location” status for coaches.

16. Pittsburgh Steelers (20)

If they had a healthy Ben Roethisberger for 16 games they would have won the division. Unless the Ravens had a healthy Suggs/Ngata/Webb/Lewis. I guess what I’m saying is that it doesn’t matter.

15. Dallas Cowboys (13)

What the eff do you do here?

14. Chicago Bears (14)

I’d want this job.

13. New York Giants (15)

“Hynocerous” is one of the Top 5 nicknames in football this year.

(Continued on Page 2…)

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The Reality Check Week 17 NFL Power Rankings

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The Reality Check Week 17 NFL Power Rankings

Posted on 27 December 2012 by Glenn Clark

Glenn Clark’s Rankings…

32. Kansas City Chiefs (32)

Who’s a fit here? Josh McDaniels?

31. Arizona Cardinals (31)

At this point I have to assume Whisenhunt is gone. Players openly bitching there.

30. Jacksonville Jaguars (29)

I can’t wait until they go 7-9 next year and somehow make the playoffs with Tim Tebow as quarterback.

29. Oakland Raiders (30)

I ASSUME Dennis Allen is safe, but you absolutely never know.

28. Detroit Lions (27)

But that was at least fun to watch Saturday night.

27. Philadelphia Eagles (28)

Nice of them to give Michael Vick a farewell show.

26. Cleveland Browns (26)

I honestly wouldn’t want the job of having to solve this puzzle.

25. Tennessee Titans (25)

Jake Locker gets another year before he’s fully labeled a bust.

24. Buffalo Bills (24)

I really have nothing to say about the Buffalo Bills.

23. New York Jets (20)

HIGH-LAIR-EE-USS.

22. Tampa Bay Buccaneers (21)

I wish I had paid enough attention to the Bucs to know whose fault their collapse was.

21. San Diego Chargers (23)

“You think Jon Gruden would go there?” is the question you’ll hear most related to the Bolts in the coming weeks.

20. Pittsburgh Steelers (16)

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

19. Carolina Panthers (19)

Is the late push enough for Ron Rivera to keep his job?

18. St. Louis Rams (22)

They can finish ABOVE .500…

17. Miami Dolphins (18)

Please beat New England.

(Continued on Page 2…)

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The Reality Check Week 16 NFL Power Rankings

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The Reality Check Week 16 NFL Power Rankings

Posted on 20 December 2012 by Glenn Clark

Glenn Clark’s Rankings…

32. Kansas City Chiefs (30)

We all knew they’d end up back here.

31. Arizona Cardinals (32)

Wha…what?

30. Oakland Raiders (31)

Don’t fail me now, Seabass.

29. Jacksonville Jaguars (29)

They’ll finish the season lower.

28. Philadelphia Eagles (28)

LeSean McCoy is playing WHY?

27. Detroit Lions (25)

Stunning mess.

26. Cleveland Browns (24)

We knew it wouldn’t last.

25. Tennessee Titans (27)

But Jake Locker still stinks.

24. Buffalo Bills (23)

Hope they felt comfortable North of the Border.

23. San Diego Chargers (19)

Gave up?

22. St. Louis Rams (20)

They can still finish above .500.

21. Tampa Bay Buccaneers (17)

Completely fell apart.

20. New York Jets (18)

VICKMANIA!

19. Carolina Panthers (26)

They might be a year away.

18. Miami Dolphins (22)

Like Republicans, Fins fans want Bush back.

17. New Orleans Saints (21)

Did that whole Sean Payton thing ever get figured out?

(Continued on Page 2…)

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The Reality Check Week 15 NFL Power Rankings

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The Reality Check Week 15 NFL Power Rankings

Posted on 13 December 2012 by Glenn Clark

Glenn Clark’s Rankings…

32. Arizona Cardinals (31)

Worst game ever?

31. Oakland Raiders (32)

Congratulations on not being the Cardinals?

30. Kansas City Chiefs (29)

Normalcy likely still not fully returned.

29. Jacksonville Jaguars (28)

So do I play Montell Owens next week?

28. Philadelphia Eagles (30)

I’d like to watch Jason Avant’s catch every day of the week.

27. Tennessee Titans (26)

Think they wouldn’t like to have Joe Flacco?

26. Carolina Panthers (27)

The Gus Johnson-Cam Newton connection is something I can support.

25. Detroit Lions (21)

Still think they’re better than their record.

24. Cleveland Browns (25)

Would you have ever believed there’d be a point they were above the Lions on this list?

23. Buffalo Bills (20)

That’s the sound of Fred Jackson owners scrambling.

22. Miami Dolphins (19)

Starting to wonder if they’re even a year away.

21. New Orleans Saints (17)

They probably needed some good news.

20. St. Louis Rams (22)

Wait…who?

19. San Diego Chargers (24)

I miss Jarret Johnson.

18. New York Jets (23)

Worst 6-7 team ever.

17. Tampa Bay Buccaneers (15)

Are they any good?

(16-1 on Page 2…)

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“The Reality Check” Week 14 NFL Power Rankings

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“The Reality Check” Week 14 NFL Power Rankings

Posted on 06 December 2012 by Glenn Clark

Glenn Clark’s Rankings…

32. Oakland Raiders (31)

Carson Palmer must feel better and better himself by the day.

31. Arizona Cardinals (30)

They’re just going to keep letting Ryan Lindley play, aren’t they?

30. Philadelphia Eagles (29)

Can I get some more Bryce Brown the rest of the way, please?

29. Kansas City Chiefs (32)

You felt good for them.

28. Jacksonville Jaguars (28)

Cecil Shorts and Justin Blackmon would look SO good in purple.

27. Carolina Panthers (21)

Yeesh.

26. Tennessee Titans (24)

Next season will be crucial for Jake Locker.

25. Cleveland Browns (27)

Well…they’re winning.

24. San Diego Chargers (22)

Why would they hire Andy Reid?

23. New York Jets (26)

MCELROYBUTTFUMBLETEBOWMANIA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

22. St. Louis Rams (23)

Best nickname of 2012: “Legatron” or “The Muscle Hamster”? There are no other options.

21. Detroit Lions (20)

This whole season is a disappointment.

20. Buffalo Bills (25)

Not far from .500.

19. Miami Dolphins (17)

That was their best chance. Going to need a miracle.

18. Minnesota Vikings (18)

Running out of time.

17. New Orleans Saints (13)

Not impossible they run table…they’ll have to.

(Ryan’s rankings on Page 2…)

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“The Reality Check” Week 13 NFL Power Rankings

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“The Reality Check” Week 13 NFL Power Rankings

Posted on 28 November 2012 by Glenn Clark

Glenn Clark’s Rankings…

32. Kansas City Chiefs (32)

Stay low for Geno?

31. Oakland Raiders (30)

I’d say they had a good chance to get a win this weekend, but…

30. Arizona Cardinals (26)

How has Larry Fitzgerald not completely lost his mind?

29. Philadelphia Eagles (25)

The Ravens lost to this team…

28. Jacksonville Jaguars (31)

Chad by God Henne.

27. Cleveland Browns (28)

Eight turnovers…barely squeaked by.

26. New York Jets (24)

SAVE US, TEBOW!

25. Buffalo Bills (23)

But Toronto won the Grey Cup!

24. Tennessee Titans (22)

Didn’t mention Munchak on the hot seat, but he is, right?

23. St. Louis Rams (27)

Wondering if other teams can trade for Ryan Lindley.

22. San Diego Chargers (21)

Now beat Cincinnati, please.

21. Carolina Panthers (29)

Looked an awful lot like what they were supposed to look like.

20. Detroit Lions (19)

God awful way to lose.

19. Dallas Cowboys (17)

What do you do when the quarterback isn’t your problem but the quarterback has to be portrayed as the problem?

18. Minnesota Vikings (13)

But at least they only have to go to Green Bay next week.

17. Miami Dolphins (20)

Not buying back in yet.

(16-1 on Page 2…)

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The 15-7-0 is made up of 60% water, 40% leftover turkey and cranberry relish

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The 15-7-0 is made up of 60% water, 40% leftover turkey and cranberry relish

Posted on 26 November 2012 by Glenn Clark

As always, this week’s 15-7-0 is brought to you by Roofing By Elite. Visit them at roofingbyelite.com. We make 15 observations about football that are ELITE, 7 that are “not so ELITE” and one “zero” who deserves to sleep on the roof from outside of football.

(As a reminder, we don’t do Baltimore Ravens game analysis here. We do PLENTY of that elsewhere. This is about the rest of the world of football.)

Here we go.

“The Elite 15″…

1. I have to assume that at this point they don’t need to keep trying to wake up the echoes in South Bend.

Remember when the Trojans were down two scores late and went for it on 4th down anyway? I bet that worked out well…

I can’t tell if Fighting Irish LB (and likely Heisman Trophy finalist) Manti Te’o was excited about the win, though…

Also, what do you think Lane Kiffin was thinking here…

Of course, the Trojans are NEVER losers…

2. Now that Jay Cutler has returned to save the Chicago Bears’ season, we can all get back to talking about how much Jay Cutler sucks.

He’s unlikeable, but he’s a hell of a QB…

Back to that “unlikeable” thing. Ask AJ Jefferson…

J’Marcus Webb might disagree though…

3. Jesus. Weren’t the Bengals just completely dead a couple weeks ago?

Mohamed Sanu had a busy day (on my fantasy football bench)…

Credit to NFL Red Zone’s Scott Hanson-who saw Raiders DL Tommy Kelly in a fight and IMMEDIATELY noticed he was a doppelganger for Suge Knight…

4. There might be a LITTLE bit of drama headed to New York this year, but I’m pretty confident Johnny Manziel has locked up the Heisman Trophy.

His big game Saturday against Missouri happened AFTER Johnny Football overcame this troublesome looking injury…

Manziel will finally speak to the media for the first time Monday. He’ll have to play catch up to the all out blitz the Irish have gone through with Te’o…

5. Now Alabama plays Georgia next week for the right to be favored to win the BCS Championship Game.

Georgia’s Alec Ogletree prepared for the SEC Championship showdown by going all Kurt Angle on Georgia Tech…

Elsewhere in the SEC, I give you Jarvis Landry!

(Continued on Page 2…)

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The Reality Check Week 12 NFL Power Rankings

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The Reality Check Week 12 NFL Power Rankings

Posted on 22 November 2012 by Glenn Clark

Glenn Clark’s Rankings…

32. Kansas City Chiefs (31)

If you don’t have anything nice to say…

31. Jacksonville Jaguars (32)

Like we all said, all you need to do to have a chance against the Texans is play Chad Henne and Jalen Parmele.

30. Oakland Raiders (28)

They’re…ummm….not good.

29. Carolina Panthers (29)

I’ll make Ron Rivera my bet for “coach who doesn’t last the season.”

28. Cleveland Browns (30)

And now we root like hell for the Browns Sunday.

27. St. Louis Rams (26)

They gave away over 1,000 tickets to the Jets game to the military…but most couldn’t handle the trauma of attendance.

26. Arizona Cardinals (25)

Ryan Lindley CAN’T be a good idea.

25. Philadelphia Eagles (23)

I’m playing Bryce Brown in one of my leagues, so…

24. New York Jets (27)

I don’t think much of that win.

23. Buffalo Bills (24)

Are they improving? Are the Dolphins terrible? What’s that, ham?

22. Tennessee Titans (21)

So…do I play Kenny Britt against the Jags this week?

21. San Diego Chargers (20)

I’m still scared sh*tless.

20. Miami Dolphins (19)

What happened here?

19. Detroit Lions (17)

So…I guess it’s about over?

18. Washington Redskins (22)

I’m not certain I’m ready to buy back in.

17. Dallas Cowboys (18)

Zombies.

(16-1 on Page 2…)

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The Reality Check Week 11 NFL Power Rankings

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The Reality Check Week 11 NFL Power Rankings

Posted on 14 November 2012 by Glenn Clark

Glenn Clark’s Rankings…

32. Jacksonville Jaguars (31)

I had a funny feeling they’d end up back here.

31. Kansas City Chiefs (32)

In my heart of hearts, their defense is better than the Jags’.

30. Cleveland Browns (26)

The entire state is too concerned with the Buckeyes’ pursuit of an undefeated season to notice.

29. Carolina Panthers (28)

Oh right. They stink. Sorry I forgot that.

28. Oakland Raiders (24)

Just an absolutely piss poor effort. Which I appreciated.

27. New York Jets (25)

Rex is popular enough that he’ll survive this.

26. St. Louis Rams (30)

They deserved to lose and stole a tie.

25. Arizona Cardinals (23)

Welcome back from the bye. Enjoy Atlanta.

24. Buffalo Bills (27)

That was pretty respectable.

23. Philadelphia Eagles (21)

There are too many good players to be this bad.

22. Washington Redskins (22)

This is a big stretch here after the bye for Mike Shanahan.

21. Tennessee Titans (29)

Where the hell did that come from?

20. San Diego Chargers (18)

And yet…do any of you feel comfortable about the Ravens’ trip to San Diego next week?

19. Miami Dolphins (14)

This is a crucial test for them on Thursday Night Football.

18. Dallas Cowboys (19)

They don’t go away, do they?

17. Detroit Lions (12)

That could end up being a brutal loss to their playoff hopes.

(16-1 on Page 2…)

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The Reality Check Week 10 NFL Power Rankings

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The Reality Check Week 10 NFL Power Rankings

Posted on 07 November 2012 by Glenn Clark

Glenn Clark’s Rankings…

32. Kansas City Chiefs (32)

Getting rid of Stanford Routt will probably solve everything, though.

31. Jacksonville Jaguars (31)

I have to come up with eight more weeks of commentary to make about them.

30. St. Louis Rams (29)

They really have three wins?

29. Tennessee Titans (26)

They’re better than that, aren’t they?

28. Carolina Panthers (30)

I THINK they’re on the uptick?

27. Buffalo Bills (27)

Played the Texans better than the Ravens did.

26. Cleveland Browns (25)

But they’ve got Phil Dawson.

25. New York Jets (24)

Has any team ever been less excited to come back from a bye week?

24. Oakland Raiders (23)

It’s a good time to see them here.

23. Arizona Cardinals (19)

I’ve got nothing.

22. Washington Redskins (18)

At least they have their throwback uniforms.

21. Philadelphia Eagles (17)

Firing Juan Castillo totally solved their O-Line.

20. Cincinnati Bengals (20)

I left them alone for keeping things competitive against the Broncos. I’m giving them too much credit.

19. Dallas Cowboys (15)

Jerry Jones should be locked out of a number of rooms at this point.

18. San Diego Chargers (28)

I knocked them down too far. I’ll probably do it again.

17. Tampa Bay Buccaneers (22)

DOUG MARTIN DOUG MARTIN DOUG MARTIN DOUG MARTIN DOUG MARTIN DOUG MARTIN.

(16-1 on Page 2…)

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