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Top 10 Baseball Distractions

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Top 10 Baseball Distractions

Posted on 25 April 2011 by Glenn Clark

Honorable Mention: Golf-PGA Tour Zurich Classic of New Orleans (Thursday & Friday 3pm live on Golf Channel, Saturday & Sunday 3pm live on CBS. All golf from Avondale, LA), LPGA Tour Avnet LPGA Classic (Thursday & Friday 12:30pm, Saturday & Sunday 4pm. All golf from Mobile, AL live on Golf Channel); Soccer: U.S. Open Cup-New England Revolution @ DC United (Tuesday 7:30pm RFK Stadium), MLS-DC United @ Houston Dynamo (Friday 8:30pm from Houston live on Fox Soccer Channel)

10. Rise Against/Bad Religion (Wednesday 6pm Rams Head Live, Tuesday 6:30pm 9:30 Club), Guster (Friday 7pm Rams Head Live), Jackie Greene (Sunday 6:30pm Rams Head Live, Wednesday 7:30pm Birchmere); Stone Temple Pilots (Tuesday 6:30pm Pier Six Pavilion), Wiz Khalifa (Thursday 6:30pm Pier Six Pavilion); Alkaline Trio (Sunday 6:30pm Recher Theatre); Saliva (Friday 7pm Bourbon Street); Jon Spencer Blues Explosion (Wednesday 8pm Ottobar); Rockapella (Sunday 8pm Rams Head On Stage); 30 Seconds to Mars (Wednesday 7pm Patriot Center); Dan Band (Friday 7pm 9:30 Club); Peter Bjorn and John (Saturday 7pm 9:30 Club); Brand New (Tuesday 6:30pm Sonar); Neil Young (Wednesday & Thursday 8pm Hippodrome); UMBC Quadmania feat. Snoop Dogg (Friday 8pm RAC Arena); Sweetlife Festival feat. The Strokes, Girl Talk, Ra Ra Riot, Lupe Fiasco, Cold War Kids (Sunday 12pm Merriweather Post Pavilion); Tony Rock (Thursday-Sunday DC Improv); Brian Regan (Sunday 7pm Meyerhoff Symphony Hall); David Crosby & Graham Nash (Monday 8pm Strathmore); Bill Bellamy (Thursday-Saturday Baltimore Comedy Factory); “A Toast to William Donald Schaefer” (Tuesday 5pm Phillips Harborplace)

So you mean to tell me both Pier Six AND Merriweather are opening this week? TREMENDOUS news! Perhaps there WILL be a Summer this year after all!

And STP is opening Pier Six? I think I’ll stop by after the Schaefer toast!

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5OSlj_J6CCQ[/youtube]

Wiz Khalifa is a Pittsburgh Steelers fan. If you enjoy “Black & Yellow” you’re a bad person. If you enjoy other Wiz Khalifa tunes…well…this could go either way.

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UhQz-0QVmQ0[/youtube]

Funny story about The Strokes. Their drummer was dating Drew Barrymore when they played HFStival back in 2006. I was wandering around backstage and nearly tackled her because she was roughly 3 feet tall.

Wait…did I say “funny”? I meant “here’s something I can say about the Strokes before posting their video. It’s non-sensical.”

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_l09H-3zzgA[/youtube]

When I went to UMBC, Busta Rhymes played Quadmania. This year they’ve got Snoop Dogg. Meanwhile…Towson got Reel Big Fish and Far East Movement for their concert. Advantage…once again…UMBC.

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2hc869OVXCw&feature=fvst[/youtube]

Neil Young’s coming to town. We all have one uncle who is FREAKING OUT in anticipation…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PTTsyk-pyd8[/youtube]

9. Towsontown Spring Festival (Saturday & Sunday throughout downtown Towson); Citypaper Brewfest (Saturday 1pm Broadway Square Fells Point)

Another sign that Summer could actually happen this year? Two AMAZING events that happen to fall on the same weekend that I have to spend sitting behind a desk in Owings Mills! (Hey…at least I get Sunday.)

If you’re not familiar, Towson looks lovely as Spring finally turns to Summer. You know what I mean, right? “Lovely”?

Really? I have to spell this out for you?

tu

Yeah…it still doesn’t do it justice.

8. NBA Playoffs: Eastern Conference Quarterfinals-Indiana Pacers vs. Chicago Bulls (Game 5 Tuesday 8pm from Chicago live on TNT, Game 6 if necessary Thursday from Indianapolis TBD, Game 7 if necessary Saturday TBD from Chicago live on TNT), Atlanta Hawks vs. Orlando Magic (Game 5 Tuesday 7:30pm from Orlando live on NBATV, Game 6 if necessary Thursday TBD from Atlanta, Game 7 if necessary Saturday TBD from Orlando live on TNT), Philadelphia 76ers vs. Miami Heat (Game 5 Wednesday 7pm from Miami live on TNT, Game 6 if necessary Friday TBD from Philly, Game 7 if necessary Sunday TBD from Miami); Western Conference Quarterfinals-New Orleans Hornets vs. Los Angeles Lakers (Game 5 Tuesday 10:30pm from LA live on TNT, Game 6 Thursday TBD from New Orleans live on TNT, Game 7 if necessary Saturday TBD from LA live on TNT), Memphis Grizzlies vs. San Antonio Spurs (Game 5 Wednesday TBD from San Antonio, Game 6 if necessary Friday TBD from Memphis, Game 7 if necessary Sunday TBD from San Antonio), Denver Nuggets vs. Oklahoma City Thunder (Game 5 Wednesday TBD from Oklahoma City, Game 6 if necessary Friday TBD from Denver, Game 7 if necessary Sunday TBD from Oklahoma City), Dallas Mavericks vs. Portland Trailblazers (Game 6 Thursday TBD from Portland, Game 7 if necessary Saturday TBD from Dallas live on TNT)

What I like? The Washington Wizards never sniffed the playoffs. What I like more? Steve Blake is over his bout with the chicken pox. What I like even more than that? JUEVOS!!!

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zUy3gFYF48w[/youtube]

7. Auto Racing: NASCAR Matthew and Daniel Hansen 400 (Saturday 7:30pm from Richmond live on FOX); Itaipava Sao Paulo Indy 300 (Sunday 12pm from Sao Paulo, Brazil live on VERSUS)

This week’s NASCAR race is called the “Matthew and Daniel Hansen 400.”

Rex Snider…please defend this somehow.

I’m sorry I can’t make the trip to Richmond by the way…I would have looked forward to doing what other NASCAR fans do…

nascar

6. NHL Playoffs: Washington Capitals vs. TBA (2nd round playoffs Friday-Monday from Verizon Center live on Comcast SportsNet/VERSUS/NBC)

Everyone keeps asking…who would you want to see the Caps play in the next round?

I keep responding…”Are the 1980′s Edmonton Oilers an option?”

oilers

5. Pro Wrestling: WWE Extreme Rules (Sunday 8pm from Tampa Bay live on Pay-Per-View)

They’re calling this event “Extreme Rules.” They might as well call it “we used to do awesome things…now we just do a lot of John Cena.”

This event used to be called “ECW One Night Stand.” It used to be really good…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BvmQDYIZUcA[/youtube]

4. College Lacrosse: Loyola @ Johns Hopkins (Saturday 2pm from Homewood Field live on ABC2/ESPN3.com); St. Joseph’s @ Towson (Saturday 7:30pm Unitas Stadium)

I have an AWFUL feeling that Saturday night’s game could be Tony Seaman’s last as Tigers head coach. If it is…the whole Towson community owes Coach a MAJOR debt of gratitude.

As far as JHU-Loyola goes, I get the feeling there will be more than one “Lax bro” in attendance…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Nqg01Nk3SYI[/youtube]

3. College Football: Maryland Red/White Spring Game (Saturday 3:30pm Byrd Stadium); Towson University Tiger Bowl (Saturday 1pm Unitas Stadium)

Torrey Smith might be gone, but there will be a receiver on the field for the Terps Saturday that might be even more familiar to you…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CmmnA8WVqW8[/youtube]

2. Mixed Martial Arts: Shogun Fights IV (Saturday 6:30pm 1st Mariner Arena); UFC 129: Georges St. Pierre vs. Jake Shields (Saturday 9pm from Toronto live on Pay-Per-View)

I don’t think I need to explain again to you how much I think you should attend Shogun Fights Saturday night. John Rallo does a HELL of a job putting the event on. It’s outstanding. There will be a number of Ravens in attendance…DT’s Kelly Gregg and Arthur Jones have even worked out with Rallo at Ground Control.

(You can hear Gregg, Rallo and Thyrl Nelson talk about that on last week’s episode of “The MMA Report” on AM1570 WNST in the BuyAToyota.com Audio Vault at WNST.net!)

Speaking of Ravens, did you miss Tom Zbikowski’s knockout of Blake Werner Saturday night? Here it is…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XBNewPy3frY[/youtube]

Tom was introduced as an “All-Pro.” He now has the responsibility to live up to that this season.

1. NFL Draft (Thursday 8pm Friday 6pm Saturday 12pm from New York live on NFL Network & ESPN)

Jimmy Smith? Jon Baldwin? Mike Pouncey? Derrek Sherrod? Cameron Heyward? Muhammad Wilkerson? Torrey Smith? Nate Solder? JJ Watt?

There are going to be a bunch of new players headed to Charm City this weekend, but I feel like the only way I could be satisfied is if I heard one particular name called Thursday night…Masha Novoselova. (Thanks Guyism!)

masha

I definitely feel like I could root for her.

Flexing my mic muscles since 1983…

-G

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Top 10 Baseball Distractions

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Top 10 Baseball Distractions

Posted on 18 April 2011 by Glenn Clark

Honorable Mention: Mixed Martial Arts-Bellator Fighting Championships 42 (Saturday 9pm from Concho, OK live on MTV2); Arena Football: AFL Kansas City Command @ Chicago Rush (Friday 8pm from Chicago live on NFL Network); Soccer: MLS-New York Red Bulls @ DC United (Thursday 8pm from RFK Stadium live on ESPN2); Tennis: ATP Barcelona Open BancSabadell (Friday 6:30am, Saturday & Sunday 4pm from Barcelona on Tennis Channel); Golf: PGA Tour The Heritage (Thursday & Friday 3pm live on Golf Channel, Saturday & Sunday 3pm live on CBS. All golf from Hilton Head, SC); Champions Tour Liberty Mutual Legends of Golf (Friday 12:30pm live on Golf Channel, Saturday & Sunday 1pm live on CBS. All golf from Savannah, GA)

10. Rush (Friday 7:30pm 1st Mariner Arena); Coheed and Cambria (Tuesday 7pm Rams Head Live, Wednesday 7pm 9:30 Club), Crack The Sky (Saturday 8pm Rams Head Live); Rooney (Wednesday 7pm Bourbon Street); John Popper & The Duskray Troubadours (Tuesday 8pm Rams Head On Stage, Thursday 8:30pm State Theatre), Bret Michaels (Thursday 8pm Rams Head On Stage); Michael McDonald (Thursday-Saturday DC Improv); Charlie Sheen (Tuesday 8pm D.A.R. Constitution Hall); Stephen Kellogg (Friday 8:30pm Jammin’ Java-Vienna); Soulive (Saturday 9pm State Theatre); Local H (Sunday 8:30pm Rock & Roll Hotel), J Roddy Walston & The Business (Wednesday 8:30pm Rock & Roll Hotel); Saliva (Monday 7pm Jaxx); Gorillaz “The Fall” available in stores/on iTunes (Tuesday)

I’m ABSOLUTELY done with the Charlie Sheen fascination. I’m done even with the morbid curiosity. Unless he’s donning a Cleveland Indians jersey and hurling fastballs, I’m simply not interested.

I AM interested however in a Charm City appearance by the holy trinity…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=U7DFsBcVMDA[/youtube]

Love Blues Traveler? You’re a good American. I loved Blues Traveler myself and will absolutely admit that I’m all in on John Popper’s new project…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6f5xq5bRaQU[/youtube]

Want to hear something that TOTALLY kicks ass? Here are Soulive and Robert Randolph doing Michael Jackson’s “Don’t Stop ‘Til You Get Enough”…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JC_HXU-N3Ac[/youtube]

I’m not sure if anyone is still in the band, but I know Local H at least USED to be pretty awesome…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E2Oe5YKhzCE[/youtube]

9. Glenn Clark’s Easter Plans (Sunday)

Here’s what I know. I DEMANDED Cadbury Cream Eggs Benedict from my girlfriend last year and she failed. It had better not happen again…

cadburycreameggsbenedict

This is proof that God exists…I think.

8. Mortal Kombat available on Playstation3/XBox360 (Tuesday)

11 year old Glenn Clark is FREAKING OUT RIGHT NOW.

If Streetfighter Turbo comes next, I might be in full blown panic mode.

While we’re on the subject of video games, how many folks do you know that are Grand Champions in NFL Blitz 2000?

The answer is at least one.

blitz

7. College Football: Navy Blue-Gold Spring Game (Friday 7pm from Navy-Marine Corps Memorial Stadium live on CBS Sports)

I won’t be able to make it out to Annapolis Friday night, but I do have a couple of thoughts related to College Football.

1-Alabama fans have to be at least a LITTLE embarrassed by the Nick Saban statue that was unveiled in Tuscaloosa, right? Of course, the more embarrassing part is that I’m SURE this means Auburn is rushing to get a Gene Chizik statue erected too.

2-Cliff Tucker is trying is hand as a receiver for the Maryland football team now that the whole hoops thing is over, huh? Seems like a good option, but I feel as though maybe I would have gone with Competitive Cheer…

cheer

6. NBA Playoffs: Eastern Conference Quarterfinals-New York Knicks vs. Boston Celtics (Game 2 Tuesday 7pm from Boston live on TNT, Game 3 Friday 7pm from New York live on ESPN, Game 4 Sunday 3:30pm from New York live on ABC); Atlanta Hawks vs. Orlando Magic (Game 2 Tuesday 7:30pm from Orlando live on NBA TV, Game 3 Friday 8pm from Atlanta live on ESPN2, Game 4 Sunday 7pm from Atlanta live on TNT); Chicago Bulls vs. Indiana Pacers (Game 3 Thursday 7pm from Indianapolis live on NBA TV, Game 4 Saturday 2:30pm from Indianapolis live on TNT); Miami Heat vs. Philadelphia 76ers (Game 3 Thursday 8pm from Philadelphia live on TNT, Game 4 Sunday 1pm from Philadelphia live on ABC); Western Conference Quarterfinals-Portland Trailblazers vs. Dallas Mavericks (Game 2 Tuesday 9:30pm from Dallas live on TNT, Game 3 Thursday 10:30 from Portland live on TNT, Game 4 Saturday 5pm from Portland live on TNT, Game 5 Monday from Dallas TBD); Denver Nuggets vs. Oklahoma City Thunder (Game 2 Wednesday 8pm from Oklahoma City live on TNT, Game 3 Saturday 10pm from Denver live on ESPN, Game 4 Monday 10:30pm from Denver live on TNT); Memphis Grizzlies vs. San Antonio Spurs (Game 2 Wednesday 8:30pm from San Antonio live on NBA TV, Game 3 Saturday 7:30pm from Memphis live on ESPN, Game 4 Monday from Memphis TBD); New Orleans Hornets vs. Los Angeles Lakers (Game 2 Wednesday 10:30pm from Los Angeles live on TNT, Game 3 Friday 9:30pm from New Orleans live on ESPN, Game 4 Sunday 9:30pm from New Orleans live on TNT)

Let’s be honest…NBA basketball is AWFUL in the regular season and just sorta okay in the playoffs.

But Dwyane Wade and Jalen Rose (and Kyle Korver) did some pretty impressive things over the weekend…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hC9H66odmrk[/youtube]
[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=748HJrUPuys[/youtube]

5. NHL Playoffs: Washington Capitals @ New York Rangers Game 4 (Wednesday 7pm from New York live on Comcast SportsNet & VERSUS), New York Rangers @ Washington Capitals Game 5 (Saturday 3pm from Verizon Center live on NBC), Washington Capitals @ New York Rangers Game 6 if necessary (Monday TBD from New York live on Comcast SportsNet)

I know there are a few folks in Baltimore who have gone to the dark side and are rooting for the hockey team down in the Nation’s Capital.

That’s their choice…I won’t judge them. Much. I MIGHT however buy them a new Washington Redskins shirt to wear this football season while we’re all donning purple at M&T Bank Stadium.

To those that are still on the fence, I encourage you to root for the Rangers. If you’re not familiar with Sean Avery, let me introduce you to a few young ladies who ARE familiar with Mr. Avery…

Hilary Rhoda

rhoda

Elisha Cuthbert

cuthbert

Lake Bell

lakebell

And “Stacy’s Mom” herself, Rachel Hunter

rachelhunter

You seriously don’t think this guy is worth rooting for?!?!?

4. Charm City Heroes (Friday-Saturday Pikesville Hilton)

With no offense to Frank Robinson, Mike Curtis, Jim Palmer, Eddie Murray, Earl Weaver, Cal Ripken Jr., Brooks Robinson, Roberto Alomar, Lenny Moore, Gino Marchetti, Art Donovan, Raymond Berry, Joe Flacco, Ray Lewis, Brian Roberts, Buck Showalter or anyone else scheduled to attend this event (holy hell that’s quite the list), it’s not complete.

I mean…seriously…how about our city’s greatest Olympic champion?

phelps

Could anything say “hero” more than that picture?!?!?

3. Ravens Pre-Draft Luncheon (Tuesday 12:45pm 1 Winning Drive, airing 5:30pm on AM1570 WNST), Brian Billick Live! Pre-NFL Draft Show (Tuesday 7pm Mother’s Federal Hill)

I guess the excitement surrounding the NFL Draft has been a bit dampened because of the lockout. But that’s only because we haven’t spent time watching NFL DRAFT PORN!

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pkLG6LHNdXk[/youtube]

I want all of them.

2. Boxing: Top Rank-Roberto Marroquin vs. Frankie Leal (Saturday 11pm from Thackerville, OK live on Fox Sports Net nationally, Comcast SportsNet locally); Joseph Agbeko vs. Abner Mares (Saturday 10:30pm from Los Angeles live on Showtime); Friday Night Fights: Breidis Prescott vs. Bayan Jargal (Friday 8pm from Uncasville, CT live on ESPN2)

Of course this makes the list because Ravens S Tom Zbikowski is scheduled to fight on the undercard of the Marroquin-Leal fight.

By the way, if you haven’t seen “The Fighter”, you might as well just admit you hate America. How AWESOME is this clip?

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oln0_q_x1lw[/youtube]

1. College Lacrosse: Navy @ Johns Hopkins (Saturday 8pm from Homewood Field live on ESPNU); Hobart @ Loyola (Saturday 12pm from Ridley Athletic Complex live on ABC2/ESPN3.com); Vermont @ UMBC (Saturday 1pm UMBC Stadium); ACC Lacrosse Tournament: Maryland vs. North Carolina (Friday 5pm from Durham, NC live on TheACC.com), ACC Championship Game (Sunday 3:30pm from Durham, NC live on Comcast SportsNet); CAC Tournament: St. Mary’s @ Stevenson (Wednesday 4pm Caves Athletic Complex), CAC Championship Game (Sunday 2pm from Caves Athletic Complex if Stevenson wins Wednesday)

I’ve posted this before I’m sure. I don’t care. Suck it, UNC!

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m0SnOgHx3eg[/youtube]

Flexing my mic muscles since 1983…

-G

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Top 10 Baseball Distractions

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Top 10 Baseball Distractions

Posted on 14 March 2011 by Glenn Clark

Honorable Mention: Golf-PGA Tour Transitions Championship (Thursday & Friday 3pm live on Golf Channel, Saturday & Sunday 3pm live on NBC. All golf from Tampa Bay, FL); Boxing: Friday Night Fights-Demetrius Hopkins vs. Brad Solomon (Friday 9pm from Hollywood, FL live on ESPN2), Lucian Bute vs. Brian Magee (Saturday 10pm from Montreal live on Showtime); Horse Racing: Rebel Stakes (Saturday 5pm from Hot Springs, Arkansas live on HRTV); Arena Football-AFL: Philadelphia Soul @ Chicago Rush (Friday 8pm from Chicago live on NFL Network); Soccer: MLS-Columbus Crew @ DC United (Saturday 7:30pm RFK Stadium)

10. Pete Yorn (Tuesday 7pm Rams Head Live), Cold (Thursday 7pm Rams Head Live), Halestorm & Charm City Devils (Saturday 7pm Rams Head Live); Mike Epps (Saturday 8pm 1st Mariner Arena), Lil’ Wayne (Sunday 7pm 1st Mariner Arena); Phil Lesh & Bob Weir (Thursday 8pm Patriot Center); Travie McCoy (Sunday 6pm Recher Theatre); America (Tuesday 8pm Rams Head On Stage); Loretta Lynn (Thursday 7pm 9:30 Club); 2nd Annual Hippodrome Foodie Experience with Alton Brown (Saturday 6pm Hippodrome); The Fighter” and “WWE True Story of Wrestlemania” available on DVD/Blu-Ray (Tuesday)

Drew Forrester and I will be Rams Head Tuesday night, because Pete Yorn is outstanding…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zginCd6D0as[/youtube]

John Allen is a Charm City rock icon. That is all.

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qmHauE5ODe4[/youtube]

If you’re not a Weezy fan, I don’t think we can be friends. Nicki Minaj is coming to town with him. I’d marry her.

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RfYcOYMNuXM[/youtube]

Is it possible for me to enjoy a Phil Lesh/Bob Weir show even if I don’t smoke pot? I mean, I dig Scarlet Begonias…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Kj_kK1j3CV0[/youtube]

9. St. Patrick’s Day (Thursday)

This year’s festivities will be a bit different, as basketball will be a bit of a priority Thursday. That being said, I need a couple of things to make my St. Patty’s Day better.

1-Bangers and Mash

bangers

2-Smithwick’s

smithwicks

3-Flogging Molly[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Trkx9xLb5X8[/youtube]

If your establishment has those three things and ample breathing room, please let me know. I will be in attendance.

8. Auto Racing: NASCAR Jeff Byrd 500 (Sunday 1pm from Bristol, TN live on FOX)

Bristol is a smaller track, which is supposed to make the race more exciting.
But really, how can it get any more exciting than THIS?!?!?!?

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1V78QFZxooQ[/youtube]

7. Tennis: ATP Tour & WTA Tour BNP Paribas Open (Tuesday & Wednesday 2pm live on Tennis Channel, Thursday 2pm & 10pm live on Tennis Channel, Friday 2pm & 6pm live on Tennis Channel 4pm & 11pm live on ESPN2, Saturday 7:30pm live on Tennis Channel 2pm & 4pm live on ABC, Sunday 2pm & 4pm live on ABC. All tennis from Indian Wells, CA)

The Indian Wells stop is one of the few tour stops on the schedule that goes two weeks despite not being a grand slam event.

Of note from what’s already happened in the draw, Donald Young defeated Andy Murray.

NO, NO…please don’t leave. I promise that’s the only tennis analysis you’ll find here. Instead, here’s the picture of Ana Ivanovic everyone likes so bad…

ivanovic

6. NBA: Washington Wizards @ Chicago Bulls (Tuesday 8pm from Chicago live on Comcast SportsNet), Washington Wizards @ Toronto Raptors (Friday 7pm from Toronto live on Comcast SportsNet PLUS), New Jersey Nets @ Washington Wizards (Sunday 1pm from Verizon Center live on Comcast SportsNet)

The ‘Zards haven’t done much of anything right this season…until this past weekend.

This past weekend they did a FANTASTIC job…of finding their way onto Blake Griffin posters!

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CHB5rNtha-A[/youtube]

Talk about giving fans EXACTLY what they paid their money for!

5. NHL: Washington Capitals @ Montreal Canadiens (Tuesday 7pm from Montreal live on Comcast SportsNet PLUS), Washington Capitals @ Detroit Red Wings (Wednesday 7:30pm from Detroit live on VERSUS & Comcast SportsNet), Washington Capitals @ New Jersey Devils (Friday 7pm from Newark, NJ live on NHL Network & Comcast SportsNet)

So everything that’s happened in the world of hockey recently has been about Zedano Charo. I’m not interested.

The only thing I care about in the world of hockey is the fact that the Phoenix Coyotes got two big points Sunday night against the Anaheim Ducks. But I don’t think anyone else cares, so I won’t go any further with it.

You know what, there’s nothing hockey interesting to post here. So instead I’ll post Zach Galifianakis’ monologue from Saturday Night Live. He KILLED…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-QnulJMA2FQ[/youtube]

Yeah. That’s better than hockey.

4. Women’s College Basketball: NCAA Tournament-St. Francis vs. Maryland (Sunday 12pm from Comcast Center live on ESPN2/ESPN3.com), Georgetown vs. Princeton (Sunday 2:30pm from Comcast Center live on ESPN2/ESPN3.com). More games Saturday-

While the Terrapins are involved, I’ll be paying attention to Women’s March Madness. In fact, I’ll probably even head down to College Park Sunday.

But if for some reason the season were to come to an end for the Terps, my interest in Women’s College Basketball would go right back to what it was before…

“What’s former UTEP star Claudia Lampe doing these days?”

UTEP

3. College Lacrosse: Denver @ Loyola (Wednesday 7pm from Ridley Athletic Complex live on AM1570 WNST), Loyola @ Air Force (Saturday 3pm from Colorado Springs, CO live on AM1570 WNST); UMBC @ Maryland (Friday 8pm from Byrd Stadium live on ABC 2 & ESPN3.com), St. Joseph’s @ Maryland (Sunday 1pm Byrd Stadium); Towson @ Navy (Tuesday 7pm Navy-Marine Corps Memorial Stadium); Stony Brook @ Towson (Saturday 1pm Unitas Stadium); Johns Hopkins @ Syracuse (Saturday 6pm from Syracuse, NY live on ESPNU); SUNY Cortland @ Stevenson (Saturday 1pm Caves Athletic Complex)

What do you think the chances are that Greyhounds nation will let me ride out to Colorado with them for the game with the Falcons? I just want to be there for the flyover…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8k5b7Pzmy74[/youtube]

By the way, I think the Hounds will beat Air Force Saturday. I don’t know if I would feel the same way if they were playing against Ivan Korshunov from Air Force One…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a1P1xOBvAyg[/youtube]

2. Mixed Martial Arts: UFC 128-Mauricio “Shogun” Rua vs. Jon “Bones” Jones (Saturday 10pm from Newark, NJ live on Pay-Per-View); Bellator Fighting Championships 37 (Saturday 7pm from Concho, OK live on MTV2)

I would suggest Baltimore be rooting for Bones Jones Saturday night, as his brother is Ravens DT Arthur Jones.

With no offense to Tom Zbikowski-who I’m pulling for-I know for SURE Saturday night’s fight will be more fulfilling than watching Zibby laugh at the Tomato Can he was placed in the ring against…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7TQIf9cMS_Y[/youtube]

If you’ve never seen Bones fight, he’s pretty freaking entertaining…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IQqiilaj1rs[/youtube]

1. College Basketball: NCAA Tournament-Butler vs. Old Dominion (Thursday 12:40pm from Verizon Center live on TruTV), Pitt vs. UNC Asheville/Arkansas-Little Rock (Thursday 3:10pm from Verizon Center live on TruTV), UConn vs. Bucknell (Thursday 7:20pm from Verizon Center live on TNT), Cincinnati vs. Missouri (Thursday 9:50pm from Verizon Center live on TNT) Other games Thursday-Sunday live on CBS, TNT, TBS and TruTV

I don’t care how many networks show the NCAA Tournament as long as two things happen.

1-They ALL play this song…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o4o_FZZ_Ccs[/youtube]

2-They somehow find a way to allow Gus Johnson to call every game…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GkiM3tBJVhk[/youtube]

Flexing my mic muscles since 1983…

-G

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Top 10 Baseball Distractions

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Top 10 Baseball Distractions

Posted on 21 February 2011 by Glenn Clark

Honorable Mention: Women’s College Basketball-Virginia Tech @ Maryland (Thursday 7:30pm Comcast Center); Boxing: Miguel Acosta vs. Brandon Rios (Saturday 10pm from Las Vegas live on Showtime), Friday Night Fights: Juan Carlos Burgos vs. Cristobal Cruz (Friday 9pm from Tulsa, Oklahoma live on ESPN2); Tennis: ATP Tour Delray Beach International Tennis Championships (Saturday 2pm & 7pm, Sunday 1pm & 3pm from Delray Beach, FL live on Tennis Channel), Abierto Mexicano Telcel (Wednesday 4pm & 8pm, Thursday 2pm & 8pm, Friday 6pm & 10pm, Saturday 10am from Acapulco, Mexico live on ESPN3.com), Dubai Duty Free Tennis Championships (Monday-Friday 5am & 10am, Saturday 10am from Dubai, United Arab Emirates live on ESPN3.com)

10. Bon Jovi (Sunday 7:30pm Verizon Center), Lady Gaga (Thursday 8pm Verizon Center); Pat Green (Saturday 7pm Rams Head Live, Wednesday 7pm 9:30 Club); Robert Cray Band (Tuesday 8pm Rams Head On Stage); David Gray (Tuesday 7:30pm Strathmore); Charlie Murphy (Thursday-Sunday DC Improv); Pat McGee Band (Friday 7:30pm Birchmere); Ryan Cabrera (Monday 8pm Jammin’ Java); G. Love “Fixin To Die” available in stores/on iTunes (Tuesday)

I saw Bon Jovi a few years ago at Jobing.com Arena in Glendale, Arizona. I was disappointed. He played country pop songs. I didn’t pay to see that. I actually didn’t pay at all. But if I had, THIS is what I would have wanted to see…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=40UQDEtRxp8[/youtube]

I like Pat McGee AND Pat Green. I also like Pat Sajak, but I don’t like Pat Boone necessarily.

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mzTL2woRzrI[/youtube]
[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fJWnIFlYKjs[/youtube]

Even our buddy Rob Fahey (of Ravyns fame) says he’s most impressed by David Gray of current musicians. That’s high praise…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sMxfKuft8x4[/youtube]

And even without the “Special Sauce”, I’d recommend picking up the new G. Love…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nCPH3dPQkIc[/youtube]

9. NBA: Indiana Pacers @ Washington Wizards (Tuesday 7pm from Verizon Center live on Comcast SportsNet), Washington Wizards @ Philadelphia 76ers (Wednesday 7pm from Philadelphia live on Comcast SportsNet), Washington Wizards @ Miami Heat (Friday 7:30pm from Miami live on Comcast SportsNet), Dallas Mavericks @ Washington Wizards (Saturday 8pm from Verizon Center live on Comcast SportsNet PLUS), Chicago Bulls @ Washington Wizards (Monday 7pm from Verizon Center live on Comcast SportsNet)

It used to be that when the Chicago Bulls would come to play the ‘Zards (or the Bullets, really), the games would actually mean something.

Now…they’re just the next team on the schedule…that will probably beat the Wizards.

That being said, they still have SOMETHING going for them…in fact, the best player in the history of NBA Jam…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DkM0BE-Iu6M[/youtube]

Benny the Bull was better than Michael Jordan.

Probably a better golfer, too.

8. Auto Racing: NASCAR Subway Fresh Fit 500 (Sunday 3pm from Phoenix live on FOX)

With the fellas on the Sprint Cup Series headed into Arizona, I’d take a second to remind everyone that Daytona 500 winner Trevor Bayne and company will have a few of their own “distractions” to deal with…

asu
asu
asu

I’ve had the water out there. There IS something in it.

7. Golf: WGC Accenture Match Play Championship (Wednesday 12pm, Thursday & Friday 2pm, Saturday 12pm, Sunday 9am live on Golf Channel; Saturday & Sunday 2pm live on NBC. All golf from Marana, AZ); PGA Tour Mayakoba Golf Classic at Riviera Maya-Cancun (Thursday-Saturday 6:30pm, Sunday 7pm from Playa del Carmen, Mexico live on Golf Channel); LPGA Tour HSBC Women’s Champions (Thursday & Friday 11am, Saturday 10am, Sunday 2pm from Singapore live on Golf Channel)

This will be the only week all year that I give half a crap about Golf. Why? Because I get to fill out brackets! You could put together a Pokemon card tournament-if it had brackets, I’d fill them out.

I mean, I’m not going to WATCH the thing…holy hell does that sound terrible. But I’ll check at the end of the day to see how my brackets hold up. And I’ll of course pick  Chi Chi Rodriguez to win. He’s going to have to break through one of these weeks.

6. NHL: New York Rangers @ Washington Capitals (Friday 7pm from Verizon Center live on Comcast SportsNet PLUS & NHL Network), Washington Capitals @ New York Islanders (Saturday 7pm from New York live on Comcast SportsNet)

Meanwhile, Glenn Clark will be making the trip up I-95 to Philly to see the Philadelphia Flyers become JUST ANOTHER VICTIM for the Phoenix FREAKING Coyotes, who enter the game winners of seven in a row!

It’s just a shame the game isn’t in Arizona, cause I’d love to hear the Black Keys pump through the Wells Fargo Center…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UfYLr3IIVkQ[/youtube]

5. Monster Jam (Friday-Sunday 1st Mariner Arena)

Monster Jam is one of those events that comes around all the time that I have no REAL idea what it is and if it’s sorta white trash but really cool or REALLY white trash and only sorta cool.

Either way, I THINK Grave Digger is pretty cool….right???

gravedigger

4. Mixed Martial Arts: UFC 127-BJ Penn vs. Jon Fitch (Saturday 10pm from Sydney, AUS on Pay-Per-View)

After the last card (Anderson Silva vs. Vitor Belfort) and the next card (Jon “Bones” Jones vs. Mauricio “Shogun” Rua), I will admit that I’m not really all that upset that I’ll be missing this card while I’m in Indy.

But if I was a MMA writer/reporter headed Down Under, I know damn well I’d take a minute to seek out whoever Bliss N Eso are. Their Citizen Cope cover is pretty legit…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aCIfpZp7YcA[/youtube]

3. College Lacrosse: Loyola @ Towson (Saturday 12pm from Unitas Stadium live on ABC2/ESPN3.com/AM1570 WNST); Rutgers @ UMBC (Saturday 1pm UMBC Stadium); Siena @ Johns Hopkins (Saturday 1pm from Homewood Field live on ESPNU); Georgetown @ Maryland (Saturday 3pm from Byrd Stadium live on ESPNU); Mary Washington @ Stevenson (Wednesday 3pm Caves Athletic Complex), Kean @ Stevenson (Saturday 1pm Caves Athletic Complex)

I don’t know about the rest of you, but when I see “Georgetown” and “Maryland” next to each other, I can really only think about Keith Booth and Joe Smith. Hoyas fans probably won’t be happy for the reminder…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K-WoPhVNffA[/youtube]

I guess I have one other memory. It involves Lonny Baxter and the NCAA Tournament if I remember correctly…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Nda5RartfAw[/youtube]

2. College Basketball: Florida State @ Maryland (Wednesday 9pm from Comcast Center live on ACC Network-WNUV 54 locally), Maryland @ North Carolina (Sunday 7:45pm from Chapel Hill, NC live on Comcast SportsNet-Fox Sports Net nationally); Delaware State @ Morgan State (Wednesday 7pm Hill Field House), Morgan State @ North Carolina A&T (Monday 7pm from Greensboro, NC live on ESPNU); Drexel @ Towson (Saturday 4pm Towson Center)

I hope the Terps beat the snot out of the Seminoles Wednesday night. But I will admit that FSU will always have at least a small place in my (and Brett Favre’s) heart(s)…

sterger

Jenn Sterger wore a cowboy hat to a football game in Tallahassee five years ago and became a household name.

What a great country we live in.

1. College Football: NFL Scouting Combine (Thursday-Monday from Indianapolis live on NFL Network)

5.2 million people watched the Scouting Combine from LucasOil Stadium last year.

Of those 5.2 million, not a single one tuned in to see how Rich Eisen did in the 40 yard dash. But he did it anyway, and almost beat Ravens DT Terrence Cody!

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ar5nlv6ZPX0[/youtube]

That might seem surprising, but consider this…if hundreds of college-aged GIRLS were to descend upon a football stadium and run around in the underwear, how many MORE people would be watching?

You know, especially if one of them was SI swimsuit model Kate Upton…

upton

Flexing my mic muscles since 1983…

-G

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Top 10 Baseball Distractions

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Top 10 Baseball Distractions

Posted on 20 December 2010 by Glenn Clark

Honorable Mention: Women’s College Basketball-UMBC @ Navy (Tuesday 7pm Alumni Hall), Richmond @ Towson (Wednesday 7pm Towson Center)

10. Wale (Wednesday 7pm Rams Head Live, Tuesday 7pm 9:30 Club), Wiz Khalifa (Monday 7pm Rams Head Live); O’Malley’s March (Wednesday 6:30pm & 9:30pm Rams Head On Stage); The Roots (Monday 7pm 9:30 Club)

You’re going to see a recurring theme here. Not a whole lot going on this week. Not to take anything away from what’s happening here.

Wale is awesome, even if he roots for the effing Washington Redskins. At least he rocks Orioles hats and puts Ray Rice in his videos…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j8YxSzXnZ40[/youtube]

The Roots are the greatest hip hop band in the history of ever.

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nIVzt_vGyr8[/youtube]

I don’t care for Wiz Khalifa. He’s from Pittsburgh. He roots for the Steelers. Eff him. Instead, I enjoy THIS…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X6NDogvBJA8[/youtube]

9. Little Fockers“, “True Grit” & “Casino Jack” open in theaters (Friday); “Family Guy: It’s A Trap” available on DVD/Blu-Ray (Tuesday)

I don’t know if Little Fockers will be as funny as “Meet the Parents” or as “Ehhh” as “Meet the Fockers.” Either way, I’ll probably go see it. I mean, I can hope, right…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_rTLZujmHXY[/youtube]

I saw True Grit last week. Well, I saw MOST of True Grit last week. Late in the movie, the projector in the theater over in White Marsh blew up. But I could tell that the movie really kicked ass. Especially because Jeff Bridges was in the flick. Jeff Bridges is awesome.

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ED4VL7W6VdQ[/youtube]

And Family Guy got around to spoofing Return of the Jedi. If I gave a crap about Star Wars, I’d be more into this. Instead, I’ve spent a better part of my life having or trying to have sex with women.

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yLldVtS-G04[/youtube]

8. “24 Hours of A Christmas Story” (Friday-Saturday, TBS), “It’s A Wonderful Life” (Friday 8pm NBC)

Blah blah blah here are clips from A Christmas Story…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8XlPwsmkPHI[/youtube]
[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=46WcFObgYhI[/youtube]
[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HW4IZ0Flh3M[/youtube]
[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z2l6RnWM2tU[/youtube]
[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tJSmmbmJCLw[/youtube]

Like we need anything else here.

7. High School Basketball: Perry Hall @ Kenwood (Wednesday 6:30pm)

I don’t know what’s going to happen when my Gators visit the Bluebirds. What I DO know if that it won’t be anywhere near as awesome as what happened earlier this morning when Annapolis Area Christian School played McDonogh and Archbishop Curley. It had to be the most exciting week in AACS history…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T7IbJPTHhyw[/youtube]

6. NBA: Chicago Bulls @ Washington Wizards (Wednesday 7pm from Verizon Center live on Comcast SportsNet), Washington Wizards @ San Antonio Spurs (Sunday 7pm from San Antonio live on Comcast SportsNet), Washington Wizards @ Houston Rockets (Monday 8:30pm from Houston live on Comcast SportsNet)

It’s a shame Yao Ming got hurt, or else the ‘Zards-Rockets contest would have been Yao Ming vs. Yi Jianlian. That would be exciting, just not for anyone in America.

I’m gonna skip the part here where I make a joke that someone later tells me is racially insensitive. Instead I’m JUST going to post a picture of General Tso’s Chicken and we’ll move on from there.

generaltso

5. NHL: New Jersey Devils @ Washington Capitals (Tuesday 7:30pm from Verizon Center live on VERSUS), Pittsburgh Penguins @ Washington Capitals (Thursday 7pm from Verizon Center live on Comcast SportsNet & NHL Network), Washington Capitals @ Carolina Hurricanes (Sunday 7pm from Raleigh live on Comcast SportsNet PLUS)

Apparently the Caps have been mired in a significant losing streak recently. I say “apparently” because I simply don’t give a crap. But I don’t understand why everyone in DC is so pissed off about the Capitals losing a lot of games. They’re just doing what all of the other favorite teams in the District (Wizards, Redskins, Orioles) already do…LOSE ALL OF THEIR GAMES!

Oh, it never gets old.

redskinssuck

4. Glenn Clark’s Christmas plans (December 23-25, throughout Charm City)

Blah blah blah…I’m going to Chiapparelli’s Thursday night…

chips

And then my mom is making Stuffed Shells on Saturday…

shells

Any further questions?

3. College Basketball: NJIT @ Maryland (Wednesday 8pm Comcast Center); Princeton @ Towson (Wednesday 4pm Towson Center); Loyola @ Howard (Wednesday 7pm Burr Gymnasium)

Thank God the Terrapins are playing a basketball game Wednesday. Things have been so damn quiet in College Park during finals week. ‘Bout time there’s something to talk about.

Eh, let’s talk about Mike Leach instead. Here’s video of Mike Leach doing the weather once. It’s freaking awesome. This guy’s a maniac, but he’s about to be the Terps’ maniac. We’ll take it.

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qSPcMXWJjUg[/youtube]

2. College Football: Poinsetia Bowl-Navy vs. San Diego State (Thursday 8pm from San Diego live on ESPN), Beef ‘O’ Brady’s St. Petersburg Bowl (Tuesday 8pm from St. Petersburg, FL live on ESPN), MAACO Bowl-Utah vs. Boise State (Wednesday 8pm from Las Vegas live on ESPN), Hawaii Bowl-Hawaii vs. Tulsa (Friday 8pm from Honolulu live on ESPN), Little Caesars Bowl-Florida International vs. Toledo (Sunday 8:30pm from Detroit live on ESPN), Independence Bowl-Georgia Tech vs. Air Force (Monday 5pm from Shreveport, LA live on ESPN2)

The Midshipmen are headed to San Diego this week. Must be a tough life. Having to serve our country and having to travel during Christmas week? I sorta feel for the Mids.

Oh wait, where are they going?

sandee

A-holes.

1. NFL: Baltimore Ravens @ Cleveland Browns (Sunday 1pm from Cleveland live on CBS)

Eff Cleveland.

Eff Bernie Kosar. Eff Drew Carey. Eff Kid Cudi. Eff Trent Reznor. Eff Marquis Grissom. Eff LeBron James. (Oh wait.)

You know, I should feel bad for Cleveland because the city is awful, all of their sports teams suck and they lost the only thing about the city that made them remotely worthwhile; but they always treat everyone who comes from Baltimore like crap. (I understand why, don’t get me wrong.)

So eff them. I ENJOY their suffering. In fact, enjoy this a-holes.

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RTeCc8jy7FI[/youtube]

(Edit from GMC: A side note, Cleveland. After the Ravens kick your asses Sunday, it would be REALLY nice if you could go ahead and beat the Pittsburgh Steelers the following week. We still kinda want to win the AFC North here in Baltimore. So all of those mean things I said about you? They expire in a week.)

Flexing my mic muscles since 1983…

-G

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Top 10 Baseball Distractions

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Top 10 Baseball Distractions

Posted on 23 November 2010 by Glenn Clark

Honorable Mention-NHL: Washington Capitals @ Carolina Hurricanes (Wednesday 7pm from Raleigh live on Comcast SportsNet), Tampa Bay Lightning @ Washington Capitals (Friday 5pm from Verizon Center live on Comcast SportsNet), Carolina Hurricanes @ Washington Capitals (Sunday 5pm from Verizon Center live on Comcast SportsNet & NHL Network)

10. Ozzy Osbourne (Monday 7:30pm 1st Mariner Arena); Charm City Devils (Friday 7pm Rams Head Live), Jah Works (Saturday 8pm Rams Head Live); Crack The Sky (Saturday 8pm Recher Theatre); Citizen Cope (Tuesday & Wednesday 7:30pm Birchmere, Friday 8:30pm, Saturday 1:30pm & 8:30pm Rams Head On Stage); Carbon Leaf (Wednesday 6pm 9:30 Club), Donovan Frankenreiter (Thursday 8pm 9:30 Club), Cyndi Lauper (Saturday 6pm 9:30 Club), KT Tunstall (Saturday 10pm 9:30 Club), Brandon Flowers (Monday 7pm 9:30 Club); Shelby Lynne (Monday 7:30pm Birchmere); Lisa Lampanelli (Saturday 7pm Warner Theatre); Kanye West “My Beautiful Dark Twisted Fantasy” available in stores/on iTunes (Tuesday); Inception“, “Despicable Me” and “Shrek Forever After” available on DVD/Blu-Ray (Tuesday)

I have an attorney friend (I should probably have more of those) who has an extra ticket to see Ozzy Monday. She’s quizzing her friends about Ozzy to see who will get the ticket. The first question is one of those “just don’t answer this the wrong way” questions. It is: “What is your favorite Ozzy song?” Rumor has it there’s someone who actually DIDN’T answer “War Pigs.” Fine by me, I’m a step closer to having a ticket!

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xtqy4DTHGqg[/youtube]

No SR-71 Thanksgiving show this year, but I’d be MORE than happy to see CCD instead. I’m digging “Best of the Worst”…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h7XhpOrrkAM[/youtube]

Citizen Cope could do just about ANYTHING and I’d be in. But if I was headed to Annapolis to see him-I’d be hoping for “Pablo Picasso”…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4d4O02BJz74[/youtube]

There are a lot of rumors that this will be one of the better disc’s in Kanye’s career. I’ll admit that “Devil In A New Dress” makes me hopeful…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D55rDDvu3n4[/youtube]

9. Glenn Clark’s Thanksgiving Plans (Wednesday-Saturday)

And seriously-I think I’ve got a win.

On Wednesday, I’ll appease a roommate and we’ll watch Planes, Trains and Automobiles. Calling it a classic doesn’t really do it justice. (Clip VERY NSFW!)

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S5o8DFfYHS4[/youtube]

Thursday night is easy. Pumpkin Pie, white wine and Home Alone. It is what it is…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4dGOfFbzvq4[/youtube]

And after everything calms down Saturday, my favorite part of Turkey Day begins. You know, the part where I slab turkey, mashed potatoes and BBQ sauce on bread and forget the words “calorie intake” mean anything.

tgiving

8. Soccer-World Cup Qualifying (Women’s): Italy @ Team USA (Saturday 2pm from Bridgeview, IL live on ESPN3.com), College Soccer-NCAA Tournament: Penn State @ Maryland (Sunday 4pm Ludwig Field)

I’m so TORN here!

We all know I love the red, white & blue. And since the greatest American women’s soccer moment involved stripping, I PARTICULARLY love American women’s soccer.

But this is Italy we’re talking about. The land of my forefathers. The land that taught me that talking with my hands is as important as talking with my lips, and that my lips are more made for kissing.

It’s also the land that gave us “The Situation”! How can we root against them?!?!?

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4zT9p1vnBjo[/youtube]

7. Table Tennis: JOOLA North American Tennis Championships (Friday-Sunday Baltimore Convention Center)

I was going to simply say “I’m picking Forrest Gump” and leave it at that, but apparently the former Alabama KR is not playing this year. I’m just as surprised as you.

Seriously-I love playing ping-pong, but these people are freaking NUTS.

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A8IVASo0umU[/youtube]

WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT?!?!? WOW!

6. Tennis: Barclays ATP World Tour Finals (Tuesday-Saturday 1pm, Sunday 3pm from London live on Tennis Channel)

FINALLY! Some eye candy for the blog!!!!!!

andyroddick

Maybe not all of you are as big of Andy Roddick fans as I am, but…ummm…deal with it.

5. NBA: Philadelphia 76ers @ Washington Wizards (Tuesday 7pm from Verizon Center live on Comcast SportsNet), Washington Wizards @ Atlanta Hawks (Thursday 8pm from Atlanta live on TNT), Orlando Magic @ Washington Wizards (Saturday 7pm from Verizon Center live on Comcast SportsNet & NBA TV), Washington Wizards @ Miami Heat (Monday 7:30pm from Miami live on Comcast SportsNet)

I haven’t been following basketball in a while, do we still hate the Heat because of LeBron James?

Sorry, I just don’t pay as much attention as I probably should.

Oh and also…do you think Gary Payton and Shawn Kemp will finally get the Seattle Supersonics past the Chicago Bulls this year? That’s a hell of a combo they’ve got there in the Emerald City…

4. College Football: North Carolina State @ Maryland (Saturday 3:30pm from Byrd Stadium live on ESPN2)

Yes, the ACC Championship Game is out of the picture. But beating the Wolfpack Saturday might very well be the difference in the Terps going to a bowl game in Nashville or Charlotte instead of ending up in a bowl game at RFK Stadium.

Let’s think about that a bit. Music City gave us Kings of Leon…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5kQUjwv2R1g[/youtube]

The Queen City gave us Anthony Hamilton…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-4LVf9qdFYA[/youtube]

And DC gave us…ummm….Rod Strickland?

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XTyNwkZwCzg[/youtube]

3. College Basketball: Delaware State @ Maryland (Tuesday 8pm Comcast Center), Elon @ Maryland (Friday 8pm from Comcast Center live on Comcast SportsNet); UMBC @ Coppin State (Wednesday 7:30pm Coppin State Physical Education Complex); Loyola @ Morgan State (Monday 7pm Hill Field House); Navy @ Towson (Wednesday 7pm Towson Center)

I hate it when local teams play against each other. I mean, how do I pick between Randy Monroe’s Retrievers or Fang Mitchell’s Eagles? And how do I pick between Jimmy Patsos’ Greyhounds or Todd Bozeman’s Bears?

It’s like trying to pick what Thanksgiving dessert I enjoy more:
spp
pumpkinpie
pecanpie

You know what? I’m not picking. Good luck to ALL of the local teams this week, and please bring me one of each type of pie. MMM….pie….

2. High School Football-MPSSAA Playoffs: Broadneck @ Henry A. Wise (Saturday 1pm), Urbana @ Gaithersburg (Friday 7pm), Wilde Lake @ Damascus (Friday 7pm), Huntingtown @ Franklin (Friday 7pm), Eastern Tech @ Middletown (Friday 7pm), McDonough @ Queen Anne’s (Friday 7pm), Fort Hill @ Dunbar (Saturday 1pm Poly High School), Brunswick @ Havre de Grace (Friday 7pm); Turkey Bowl: Calvert Hall vs. Loyola Blakefield (Thursday 10am from M&T Bank Stadium live on ABC2)

Here’s what Thursday’s annual showdown between the Cardinals and Dons means to those of us in Baltimore with no MIAA ties.

You see, when you’re growing up-Calvert Hall/Loyola is simply the game you flip over to for a minute after Santa Claus strolls through New York in the Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade.

After you turn 21 and discover the “true” meaning of Thanksgiving Eve, Calvert Hall/Loyola becomes a game you can’t POSSIBLY wake up early enough to watch before stuffing your face with enough food to make you forget about your hangover.

As a side note, let’s go Franklin Indians again Friday night. You knock Ken Brinkman and North Harford High School out of the playoffs, you get EVERY ounce of support possible from me.

Up yours, Brinkman.

1. NFL: Tampa Bay Buccaneers @ Baltimore Ravens (Sunday 4:15pm from M&T Bank Stadium live on FOX); New England Patriots @ Detroit Lions (Thursday 12:30pm from Detroit live on CBS), New Orleans Saints @ Dallas Cowboys (Thursday 4:15pm from Arlington, TX live on FOX), Cincinnati Bengals @ New York Jets (Thursday 8:20pm from East Rutherford, NJ live on NFL Network)

As we gather around televisions Thursday to enjoy the annual celebration that is watching the Lions get their asses kicked, I’d like to take some time to remember the true meaning of the day.

It is important that we give thanks for the many wonderful things that have happened this year.

For example, let’s give thanks that Frank Walker now plays for the Minnesota Vikings.

And let’s give thanks that the McRib is back. It’s not my thing anymore, but I really do get it.

And finally, let’s give thanks that Amanda Harrington forgot to grab a bra before snapping this picture. (Thanks Busted Coverage!)

amandaharrington

Flexing my mic muscles since 1983…

-G

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Top 10 Baseball Distractions

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Top 10 Baseball Distractions

Posted on 08 November 2010 by Glenn Clark

Honorable Mention: Women’s College Basketball-Monmouth @ Maryland (Saturday 5pm Comcast Center); Golf: PGA Tour Children’s Miracle Network Classic (Thursday-Sunday 1pm from Lake Buena Vista, FL live on Golf Channel); College Soccer: MAAC Tournament (Friday & Sunday Ridley Athletic Complex), Stony Brook @ UMBC (Wednesday 7pm UMBC Soccer Stadium); NBA: Houston Rockets @ Washington Wizards (Wednesday 7pm from Verizon Center live on Comcast SportsNet), Charlotte Bobcats @ Washington Wizards (Friday 7pm from Verizon Center live on Comcast SportsNet), Washington Wizards @ Chicago Bulls (Saturday 8pm from Chicago live on Comcast SportsNet PLUS & WGN America)

10. Black Crowes (Wednesday 8pm Rams Head Live; Saturday & Sunday 7:30pm 9:30 Club), Music 4 Maryland feat. Pat McGaee Band (Saturday 7pm Rams Head Live), John Butler Trio (Sunday 8pm Rams Head Live); CKY (Saturday 7pm Recher Theatre); Powerman 5000 (Friday 8pm Sonar); Brad Garrett (Thursday 6pm & 9pm Rams Head On Stage); Steven Page (Thursday 6pm 9:30 Club); Rusted Root (Wednesday 8pm State Theatre); Experience Hendrix feat. Jonny Lang, Kenny Wayne Shepherd, Steve Vai, Susan Tedeschi, Living Colour (Thursday 8pm Hippodrome); Allman Brothers Band (Friday 8pm D.A.R. Constitution Hall); Shinedown (Wednesday 8pm Warner Theatre), Brian Regan (Friday 7:30pm Warner Theatre); Bob Dylan (Saturday 7pm Smith Center-George Washington University); Straight No Chaser (Saturday 8pm Meyerhoff Symphony Hall); Cee-Lo Green “Lady Killer” available in stores/on iTunes (Tuesday); Kid Cudi “Man on the Moon 2: The Legend of Mr. Rager” available in stores/on iTunes (Tuesday)

Black Crowes drummer Steve Gorman will be on with Drew Forrester Wednesday at 9:05am on “The Morning Reaction” on AM1570 WNST. On Wednesday night, you’ll hear Black Crowes drummer Steve Gorman rocking the hell out of tunes like “Remedy”…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ts3VbVVFdQs[/youtube]

I’m been saying for years that there is NO excuse for anyone to not be into John Butler Trio. They’re the best thing to come from Australia since Nicole Kidman. Strike that. JBT is better.

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WGIpieuW62s[/youtube]

If you don’t love the Allman Brothers, you might as well get the hell our of this country…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0WGVW7byRCA[/youtube]

And there is no disc coming out this year that I have looked forward to as much as I’m looking forward to Cee-Lo’s. Holy hell…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZKzHCQCHvYY[/youtube]

9. Maryland Irish Festival (Friday-Sunday Timonium Fairgrounds)

I feel like I’ve celebrated this once already this year. Wasn’t it just called St. Patrick’s Day?!?!?

stpattys

Hell…if it involves Bangers and Mash, Guinness, and screaming along to a Flogging Molly song, I don’t care when we celebrate. I’m IN.

8. Auto Racing: NASCAR Kobalt Tools 500 (Sunday 3pm from Phoenix live on ESPN)

Do I include Sunday’s NASCAR race because I give a crap about Denny Hamlin, Jimmie Johnson or anything related to the Chase For The Cup? Of course not. I include Sunday’s race because damnit, it’s happening in Arizona; and that’s a mighty fine excuse for me to remind you of other things that happen in the great state of Arizona…

asu

The scenery there is really quite breathtaking…

7. NHL: Washington Capitals @ New York Rangers (Tuesday 7:30pm from New York live on VERSUS), Tampa Bay Lightning @ Washington Capitals (Thursday 7pm from Verizon Center live on NHL Network & Comcast SportsNet), Washington Capitals @ Buffalo Sabres (Saturday 7pm from Buffalo live on Comcast SportsNet), Atlanta Thrashers @ Washington Capitals (Sunday 5pm from Verizon Center live on Comcast SportsNet)

If I was excited about something the Caps were doing, I’d tell you. Since I’m not, we’ll move on to something more interesting.

Yahoo! Sports’ Puck Daddy tells me Sean William Scott is going to be in an upcoming hockey movie entitled “Goon.” That might not be interesting in and of itself, but it reminds me of one of my favorite lines in movie history…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mlV6A3BLVBE[/youtube]

6. Boxing: Manny Pacquiao vs. Antonio Margarito, Kelly Pavlik vs. Brian Vera (Saturday 9pm from Arlington, TX live on HBO Pay-Per-View)

Dance a happy dance, Dallas. This marks the last time your fine city will host a relevant sporting event until the Super Bowl!!!

By no means do I support anything that fans of the Washington Redskins would enjoy, but I will admit that this t-shirt might be good enough to purchase….

cowboyssuck

Sorry I didn’t write anything about the boxing match. It was supposed to have Floyd Mayweather. If it did, it would be relevant.

5. High School Football-MPSSAA Playoffs: Perry Hall @ Urbana (Friday 7pm)

I know there are plenty more relevant games that are being played this weekend. But as this appears to be the final contest of the season for my Gators, I figured I’d give them a special shoutout.

The bigger issue is that it leaves me with no more opportunities to tell embarrassing stories of myself from high school. So….here’s a picture from my High School Prom. This should make up for a month’s worth of missed embarrassing stories with PHHS’s upcoming elimination…

prom

4. College Basketball: 2K Sports Classic-College of Charleston @ Maryland (Wednesday 7pm from Comcast Center live on ESPNU), Maine @ Maryland (Sunday 2pm from Comcast Center live on Comcast SportsNet); VMI @ UMBC (Sunday 3pm RAC Arena); Drexel @ Loyola (Friday 8pm Reitz Arena)

You know what I like about C-of-C? Their team is called the Cougars. In a semi-related story, here’s a picture of Diane Lane…

dianelane

3. College Football: Maryland @ Virginia (Saturday 3:30pm from Charlottesville, VA live on ESPN3.com), Central Michigan @ Navy (Saturday 3:30pm from Navy-Marine Corps Memorial Stadium live on CBS College Sports), Maine @ Towson (Saturday 2pm Unitas Stadium); South Carolina State @ Morgan State (Thursday 7:30pm Hughes Stadium); McDaniel @ Johns Hopkins (Saturday 1pm Homewood Field)

God I can’t stand the freaking Cavaliers.

I can’t stand the stupid ties they wear to games.

I can’t stand how they think “Wahoos” is a cool nickname.

I can’t stand how they use “Auld Lang Syne” as their victory song.

But what I can’t stand more than anything else? How the hell is it possible that a place I despise so much produced one of the greatest bands in the history of music?!?!?!

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IXPOHCsgWFw[/youtube]

2. Mixed Martial Arts: Shogun Fights III (Saturday 6:30pm 1st Mariner Arena); UFC 122: Nate Marquardt vs. Yushin Okami (Saturday 8pm from Oberhausen, Germany on SpikeTV); WEC: Urijah Faber vs. Takeya Mizugaki (Thursday 9pm from Las Vegas live on VERSUS)

I can’t implore you enough to head down to SF3 Saturday night. John Rallo puts on a hell of an event, and it’s cool enough just to support the notion of having big-time MMA events in Charm City. If you want a future UFC Fight Night or Strikeforce card in town, supporting Shogun Fights would be a hell of a step in the right direction.

And the thing is-if it is cool enough for THIS guy to attend, trust me-it’s much too cool for you…

rickeyhenderson

1. NFL: Baltimore Ravens @ Atlanta Falcons (Thursday 8:20pm from Atlanta live on NFL Network & WBAL11)

And what am I doing while I’m in The A-T-L this weekend? Well, I think a pilgrimage is in order….

dwarf house

I don’t know anything about the Hapeville Dwarf House, but if it’s the location of the original Chick-Fil-A, it will be the most important trip I ever take.

Flexing my mic muscles since 1983…

-G

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Morning Reaction Friday Football Picks and Comment

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Morning Reaction Friday Football Picks and Comment

Posted on 05 November 2010 by Glenn Clark

Here are this weekend’s football picks. Through two weeks in the season, Drew Forrester is 69-46 and Glenn Clark is 67-48…

Buccaneers/Falcons
: 34-13 Atlanta (Drew), 24-9 Atlanta (Glenn)
Dolphins/Ravens: 27-17 Baltimore (Drew), 27-20 Baltimore (Glenn)
Bears/Bills: 31-17 Buffalo (Drew), 16-14 Buffalo (Glenn)
Saints/Panthers: 27-17 New Orleans (Drew), 28-13 New Orleans (Glenn)
Patriots/Browns: 23-13 New England (Drew), 31-10 New England (Glenn)
Jets/Lions: 21-19 New York (Drew), 23-17 Detroit (Glenn)
Chargers/Texans: 33-27 Houston (Drew), 26-23OT San Diego (Glenn)
Cardinals/Vikings: 30-27OT Arizona (Drew), 23-12 Minnesota (Glenn)
Giants/Seahawks: 27-10 New York (Drew), 30-20 New York (Glenn)
Chiefs/Raiders: 23-17 Kansas City (Drew), 18-17 Oakland (Glenn)
Colts/Eagles: 27-24 Indianapolis (Drew), 31-24 Indianapolis (Glenn)
Cowboys/Packers: 24-20 Green Bay (Drew), 22-17 Green Bay (Glenn)
Steelers/Bengals: 20-16 Pittsburgh (Drew), 20-16 Pittsburgh (Glenn)
Maryland/Miami: 27-24 Terrapins (Drew), 24-17 Hurricanes (Glenn)
Navy/East Carolina: 32-20 Pirates (Drew), 28-17 Midshipmen (Glenn)
Towson/Delaware: 36-10 Blue Hens (Drew), 41-14 Blue Hens (Glenn)
Perry Hall/Hereford: 36-17 Bulls (Drew), 20-18 Gators (Glenn)
Glen Burnie/Chesapeake-Anne Arundel County: 3-2 Cougars (Drew), 46-0 Cougars (Glenn)

leron

If you missed the explanations during our “Picks and Comment” segment Friday on “The Morning Reaction” on AM1570 WNST, visit the BuyAToyota.com Audio Vault here at WNST.net!

Flexing my mic muscles since 1983…

-G

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Top 10 Baseball Distractions

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Top 10 Baseball Distractions

Posted on 01 November 2010 by Glenn Clark

Honorable Mention: Auto Racing-NASCAR AAA Texas 500 (Sunday 3pm from Fort Worth live on ESPN); College Soccer: William & Mary @ Maryland (Tuesday 7:30pm Ludwig Field), Coastal Carolina @ Maryland (Friday 7:30pm Ludwig Field); Boxing-Jimmy Lange vs. Joe Wyatt (Saturday 7pm Patriot Center); ShoBox-Edwin Rodriguez vs. James McGirt, Jr. (Friday 11pm from Fargo, North Dakota live on Showtime), Juan Manuel Lopez vs. Rafael Marquez/Allan Green vs. Glen Johnson (Saturday 10pm from Las Vegas live on Showtime); Zab Judah vs. Lucas Matthysse (Saturday 11:15pm from Newark, NJ live on HBO); NHL: Toronto Maple Leafs @ Washington Capitals (Wednesday 7pm from Verizon Center live on NHL Network & Comcast SportsNet), Boston Bruins @ Washington Capitals (Friday 7pm from Verizon Center live on NHL Network & Comcast SportsNet), Philadelphia Flyers @ Washington Capitals (Sunday 5pm from Verizon Center live on NHL Network & Comcast SportsNet)

10. The Cult (Tuesday 7pm Rams Head Live), Little Big Town (Wednesday 7:30pm Rams Head Live), Wolf Parade (Friday 8pm Rams Head Live), Social Distortion (Saturday 7pm Rams Head Live), La Roux (Sunday 7pm Rams Head Live); All Mighty Senators (Saturday 8pm 8×10 Club); Phil Vassar (Sunday 7:30pm Rams Head On Stage); The Script (Tuesday 7pm 9:30 Club), Ra Ra Riot (Friday 6:30pm 9:30 Club), Umphrey’s McGee (Friday & Saturday 10pm 9:30 Club); Blue Man Group (Tuesday-Friday 8pm, Saturday 2pm & 8pm, Sunday 1pm & 6:30pm Hippodrome), Interpol (Wednesday 7pm D.A.R. Constitution Hall), Kevin Hart (Friday 8pm & 10:30pm D.A.R. Constitution Hall); Bedouin Soundclash (Thursday 8:30pm Rock N Roll Hotel); Jaron And The Long Road To Leave (Thursday 8:30pm State Theatre), Soulive (Friday 9pm State Theatre); Daniel Tosh (Friday 7:30pm & 10:30pm Warner Theatre), Vince Vaughn & Kevin James (Monday 8pm Warner Theatre); Don McLean (Sunday 7:30pm Birchmere); Good Charlotte “Cardiology” available in stores/on iTunes (Tuesday), “Toy Story 3″ available on DVD/Blu-Ray (Tuesday), “Megamind” opens in theaters (Friday)

Not everyone likes country music. But I like country music. At least country music when Little Big Town is playing it…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4-XfthjK-bk[/youtube]

Mike Ness is one of the toughest dudes on the face of the planet. I feel like not only could he play a gig with Social D in Charm City this weekend, but he could possibly play safety for the Ravens as well if Dawan Landry were to get hurt…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oh8zcbC_Dcw[/youtube]

Some people think it isn’t very manly to be a fan of The Script. To those people I say, “why in the hell would you have thought I was manly otherwise?”

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gS9o1FAszdk[/youtube]

Drew Forrester and I are going to see Ra Ra Riot Friday night in DC. I’m planning on telling everyone that my grandfather actually does have fairly decent taste in music.

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kKkxXaeAhzY[/youtube]

9. World Championship Punkin Chunkin (Friday-Sunday Nassau, Delaware)

This is certainly outside the radius of what I would usually consider “local”, but it’s also awesome enough that I’m going to be forced to let it slide.

Seriously, how in the hell can you argue with an event like THIS?

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hpfGGWK46pc[/youtube]

8. Lingerie Football League: Orlando Fantasy @ Baltimore Charm (Friday 9pm 1st Mariner Arena)

I don’t consider myself an expert on the LFL by any stretch of the imagination, but I feel like it has to be somewhat disappointing that the Charm have been outscored 93-6 in their first two games of the year.

That being said, I still like it would be unfair to label the team as 0-2 for the season. Mostly because that would mean we’re labeling anyone involved with the LFL as losers…

lfl

7. Pro Wrestling: TNA “Turning Point” (Sunday 8pm from Orlando live on Pay-Per-View)

Mr. Anderson is facing Jeff Hardy at Turning Point for the strap. But that’s not what I’m most interested in. Instead, I’m much more interested in the match between the Motor City Machine Guns and Team 3D. Why? Because Team 3D is FREAKING AWESOME…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vsWt_Gh-n9A[/youtube]

6. High School Football: Perry Hall @ Hereford (Friday 7pm), Glen Burnie @ Chesapeake-Anne Arundel County (Friday 6:30pm)

As always, my PHHS Gators are coming off a blowout win (56-15 over Milford Mill) and Forrester’s Gophers are coming off a blowout loss (44-6 to North County).

But Hereford is always a tricky trip for my Gators. Which bothers me, because there is no team I want to beat more than the Bulls every season.

Why’s that?

Picture a 14 year old Glenn Clark sitting in front of window at 6am…staring out at a thin layer of snow/ice and listening to Dave Durian on WBAL…

“Baltimore County Schools…two hours late…”

YES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I DIDN’T DO ANY OF MY HOMEWORK LAST NIGHT AND I COULD REALLY USE ANOTHER 45 MINUTES OF SLEEP!!!!!!!

“…Hereford Zone only.”

WHAT?!?!?!?!? NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

So to my Gators…I don’t ask for much. But PLEASE. Win this for all of us who ever had to have our hearts broken by hearing the words “Hereford Zone only.”

Love, G.

5. NBA: Philadelphia 76ers @ Washington Wizards (Tuesday 7pm from Verizon Center live on Comcast SportsNet), Washington Wizards @ New York Knicks (Friday 7:30pm from New York live on Comcast SportsNet PLUS), Cleveland Cavaliers @ Washington Wizards (Saturday 7pm from Verizon Center live on Comcast SportsNet)

Since the ‘Zards appear to stink again this year, thank God Ted Leonsis and company have a favorable schedule. I mean, not even two weeks into the season and they’re already getting a visit from LeBron James and the Cavs!

Oh. No? Well at least they have other good things going on in DC. For example…

grossman

Oh Thank God for Rex Grossman. He couldn’t happen to a better group of A-holes.

4. College Basketball: 2K Sports Classic-Seattle @ Maryland (Monday 8pm from Comcast Center live on Comcast SportsNet), Shepherd @ Loyola (Thursday 7pm Reitz Arena); Women’s College Basketball: Gallaudet @ Maryland (Tuesday 7pm Comcast Center), District of Columbia @ Maryland (Sunday 2pm Comcast Center)

Oh College Basketball how I love thee and how much I have missed thee.

Seriously-there are few things in life that I love HALF as much as I love College Basketball.

Off the top of my head, I’d say I love O.A.R., Chris Farley movies and Belgian Wheat beers as much as I love College Basketball. Nothing else.

Well….maybe this…

jello

3. College Football: Maryland @ Miami (Saturday 12pm from Miami live on ESPNU), Navy @ East Carolina (Saturday 3:30pm from Greenville, NC live on MASN)

Okay, I REALLY don’t think the Terrapins are that good.

I know they’re 6-2. I know they’re now 3-1 in the ACC. I know they just hung 62 points on Wake Forest. I know there’s a chance Jacory Harris might not play for the Hurricanes Saturday, and the ‘Canes just lost a game to effing Virginia ANYWAY.

I’m just still not convinced Ralph Friedgen’s Terps are THAT good. But I’ve been wrong before.

For example, I was told recently that there were some new pictures of a gal named Jarah Mariano that deserved a gander. My response was “I bet they’re not that great.”

I was wrong. (Thanks Guyism!)

jarah

2. Horse Racing: Breeders’ Cup (Friday 4pm live on ESPN2, Saturday 1:30pm live on ABC, Saturday 3:30pm live on ESPN. All racing from Louisville, KY)

I can’t believe I’m missing this.

There is NOTHING better than a big racing weekend at Churchill Downs.

Of course, I’m not so sure it’ll be quite the same without the Prince of Kentucky…

glennclark

1. NFL: Miami Dolphins @ Baltimore Ravens (Sunday 1pm from M&T Bank Stadium live on CBS)

It’s not that I’m NOT excited about the Ravens and Fins Sunday afternoon. Trust me, I’m PLENTY excited about it. It’s just that it’s hard to think about ANYTHING going on at “The Bank” right now as being even in the neighborhood of the importance of what will be going on there come June 22, 2011…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ziOZCSBy4YE[/youtube]

FREAKING.YES.

Flexing my mic muscles since 1983…

-G

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Friday Morning’s Crabs and Beer

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Friday Morning’s Crabs and Beer

Posted on 20 August 2010 by Glenn Clark

Happy Friday!

It’s a Happy Friday for me because my boy Mike Polk (who did the EXCELLENT Cleveland tourism videos) is back with another song that I’m sure will be a SMASH hit in The Comeback City. It has something to do with a guy who used to play for the Cavaliers. The language is probably NSFW-unless of course you work for me. In which case, the language is basically how I say hello. (Thanks Deadspin!)…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VIe23C1NvU4[/youtube]

Let’s see what everyone has to say…

1. The AP’s David Ginsburg says Matusz sharp as Orioles dropped Texas Rangers at Oriole Park at Camden Yards

Brian Matusz was MASTERFUL last night.

Masterful to the point that after the Orioles had scored one run, I almost pulled a Drew Forrester and declared the game ‘over’ on Twitter (follow us @WNST).

Here’s the question: can Brian Matusz pitch like that (or at least consistently good) over a consistent stretch of the season? If he can, he’ll be the pitcher that Orioles fans hoped for. In fact, he’ll be a pitcher that could have made even Dave Trembley look like a real manager.

It’s nice to see it every now and then, as it makes you think it’s possible. But until I see it with regularity, it’s actually just frustrating.

You know what ISN’T frustrating? Winning. That’s awesome. Let’s keep doing that.

2. The AP/WNST.net provide numerical evidence of loss

There’s plenty good to look at here…which is strange. Matt Wieters, Corey Patterson, Brian Roberts and Felix Pie were all solid at the plate-and Koji Uehara finished things off in the 9th.

All of these are good things.

So go ahead and look at the numbers today. After you do that-take a look at Alessandra Torresani; who apparently posed for FHM…and my heart. (Thanks Guyism!)

fhm

3. MLB.com’s Brittany Ghiroli says Ty Wigginton, Andres Blanco engaged in spat after play at third in Birds’ win

This is why I can never be a “baseball guy.”

The stupid “unwritten rules”, the “baseball stuff”, etc.

Ty Wigginton blocked third base-which seemed smart enough to me. He didn’t want the guy who had just crushed a double to be able to reach third base. I didn’t either. So I was happy that Ty Wigginton blocked third base.

The guy that crushed the double thought it was a bad move baseball-wise. There are probably a least a handful of folks who feel the same way.

The discussion is so ridiculous to me that we might as well be discussing someone’s VORP while we’re at it.

Ugh.

4. Washington Post’s Dave Sheinin says O’s believe there’s ‘no coincidence’ they started playing better when Buck Showalter showed up

I’m well aware that Buck Showalter didn’t come to Charm City, flip over tables, yell at everyone in earshot and threaten immediate firings if the team didn’t start winning games.

But there is no doubt in my mind that Buck Showalter’s arrival reflected a mentality in players that their roster spot wasn’t going to be guaranteed moving forward just because they were part of Andy MacPhail’s “plan.”

Unlike under Trembley (or Juan Samuel), it appears clear that Showalter isn’t going to keep someone on the roster come Opening Day 2011 just because Andy MacPhail wants to see what they have in the player. The best 25 guys are going to make the roster.

The pitchers who have shown signs of being good but haven’t been consistent (Brian Matusz and Brad Bergesen of course top the list) are going to have to prove that they’re amongst the Top 25.

That’s as good an explanation as any as to why this team has played better since Showalter arrived. The laziness of another losing summer has made way for an understanding that every man on the roster is going to have to earn anything they might get moving forward.

5. The Sun’s Dean Jones Jr. says Robert Andino homered for Norfolk Tides in loss to Durham Bulls on farm

And before we move on from the Orioles, a couple of things…

-The Birds and Rangers continue their 4 game set tonight at OPACY; with Jake Arrieta facing C.J. Wilson. First pitch is at 7:05pm and the game can be seen on MASN2. Brad Bergesen and Kevin Millwood wrap the series for the Birds, they’ll face Cliff Lee and Tommy Hunter respectively.

-A reminder that tomorrow’s game is not on MASN or MASN2-but instead on FOX. That’s two straight Saturday FOX games for the Birds. Earlier in the year I would have preferred watching “That 70′s Show” reruns, but the Orioles have been downright watchable recently. I’d still prefer “That 70′s Show” reruns, but who wouldn’t???

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZlTOPjcyQLs[/youtube]

6. WNST.net’s Luke Jones says Ravens coach John Harbaugh believes Lardarius Webb ‘very close’ to returning from PUP list

I’m really interested in exactly how this plays out next week in Owings Mills. Having Webb part of the 53 man roster is good for multiple reasons. First of all, it gives the Ravens DESPERATELY needed depth amongst their top corners. Secondly, it may help them avoid having to keep someone on the 53 man roster that they might not necessarily want to keep-like a Cary Williams or Prince Miller.

Now, Webb has to get on the practice field at 1 Winning Drive first-and then has to prove that he’s ready to play in a game. Even if the Ravens choose to hold him out against the New York Giants next week and the St. Louis Rams in 2 weeks; he has to prove that he’s game ready for September 13 against the New York Jets.

If he does that, everything about this roster improves.

7. BaltimoreRavens.com’s Mike Duffy says Ed Dickson, Mark Clayton expected to play vs. Washington Redskins Saturday night; Oniel Cousins unlikely, Chris Carr ‘unknown’

I expect to see at least a bit of Carr on the field at FedEx Field tomorrow night, probably about as much as we’ll see from Fabian Washington. It will likely be the Travis Fisher/Cary Williams/Prince Miller show in the secondary again-and almost no doubt there will be more of Chris Hawkins and Doug Dutch as well.

At tackle, expect to see plenty of Tony Moll tomorrow night. I’m a bit surprised the Ravens didn’t make a move to bring in an extra body this week at tackle. Even more surprised knowing Louisa Lytton is not currently on another NFL roster. (Thanks Don Chavez!)…

lytton

8. Carroll County Times’ Aaron Wilson says record 112,000 fans attended Training Camp at McDaniel College in Westminster

And before we move on from the Ravens, a couple of things…

-The Ravens are walking through today, but you cannot see it live and in person as it is closed to both the media and public. They’ll face the Skins tomorrow night at FedEx Field in Landover (the city formerly known as Raljon), kickoff is at 7pm and the game can be seen live on WBAL11 and Comcast SportsNet (the CSN version is the DC broadcast). Luke Jones and I will be live at FedEx Field, hosting a “Purple Haze” chat here at WNST.net.

-Did you miss Le’Ron McClain live with Thyrl Nelson Thursday on “The Mobtown Sports Beat” on AM1570 WNST? Make sure you head over to the BuyAToyota.com Audio Vault today to check it out. Other things available in the Audio Vault include…

  • Graham Gano (Redskins kicker and former Raven)-who joined Rex Snider Thursday afternoon to preview tomorrow night’s game
  • Audio from all around Westminster-including John Harbaugh, Chris Carr, Lardarius Webb and Dannell Ellerbe
  • Greg Aiello (NFL PR Director)-who joined Rex Thursday to discuss all things Roger Goodell
  • Tom Grieve (Rangers color Analyst)-who discussed Josh Hamilton and all things Rangers with Rex as well
  • All of the Baltimore sports media auditions with Nestor Aparicio on “The Morning Reaction” Friday

It’s all there in the Audio Vault, so you have your day planned. I’m really much too good to you.

9. D1scourse’s Patrick Stevens says Maryland reserve LB Ben Pooler likely to miss season after tearing ACL in camp

While not necessarily devastating news for Ralph Friedgen’s Terps, it certainly isn’t good news either.

The Terrapins will need some LB depth, and I think Jacqueline Kirby might be the perfect choice. (Thanks Uncoached via Busted Coverage!)

kirby

10. LA Times’ Lisa Dillman says Michael Phelps failed to make final in 400 meter individual medley at Pan Pacifics

I’m not too terribly worked up by this, as this is not particularly easy.

In fact, it’s almost as tough as trying to remember the names of all of Antonio Cromartie’s kids. (Thanks HBO via Fanhouse and YouTube!)…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b5qzQ2HBh0s[/youtube]

And finally, I leave you with this.

So apparently I was duped on “The Skinwich” yesterday. It ISN’T something KFC is planning on rolling out now or anytime in the future.

BUT…that doesn’t mean that all food in the world is healthy and NOT delicious. Thanks to The Smoking Jacket, I offer you some other ideas. One if IHOP’s Pancake Cheesecake Sandwich…

IHOP

Another is Friendly’s Mac ‘n Cheese Quesadilla…

friendlys

You know what, I’m going to need a minute here…

Flexing my mic muscles since 1983…

-G

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