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Friday Morning’s Crabs and Beer

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Friday Morning’s Crabs and Beer

Posted on 07 May 2010 by Glenn Clark

Happy Friday!

It’s a Happy Friday for me because in lieu of sleep last night, I instead ventured over the The Avenue in White Marsh to see Iron Man 2. It was the right decision. There is NOTHING better than Robert Downey Jr. as Tony Stark, except for MAYBE Scarlett Johannson taking off her shirt in the back of a car. In fact, the movie could really have used more of her…

scarjo

Let’s see what everyone has to say…

1. The AP’s Dave Campbell says Wigginton homered, Bergesen shined as Birds topped Twins at Target Field

Was there a little bit of an “it’s pouring down rain, let’s just swing the bat and get this over with” situation last night for both teams? Yeah, probably. But sometimes you win games like that. In fact, almost every team NOT named the Orioles had probably won a game like that this season. It’s like banking in a 3 point shot…it still counts.

If Ty Wigginton played for any other team in Major League Baseball, we’d probably request that he be steroid tested. For example, Kelly Johnson has hit 10 home runs for the Arizona Diamondbacks this season. I’d like to see him steroid tested.

But as far as Ty Wigginton is concerned, let’s stick with Brady Anderson’s “athletic opus” and just avoid the conversation moving forward.

2. The AP/WNST.net offer numerical evidence of win

What jumps out at me from the box score last night are two things…

A-Brad Bergesen retired 20 hitters last night, yet didn’t post a single strikeout. Before we go too far down the “This was the Brad Bergsen of 2009″ path, let’s keep in mind that it was rainy and cold in Minnesota last night (I STILL don’t understand a completely open-air stadium there); and players-on both sides-were SWINGING. That being said, Bergesen was VERY effective, and hopefully can build on the start moving forward.

B-The Twinkies didn’t have a SINGLE leadoff hitter reach base last night in ANY inning. There’s no more simple formula for pitchers winning games than keeping leadoff hitters off base.

Now, two runs probably won’t win a whole ton of games this season-so forgive me if I’m not jumping off walls. It still felt good to get a win in a game that was completely uninteresting.

3. MLB.com’s Brittany Ghiroli says Uehara effective in return to Orioles

What was goofier last night: Koji Uehara’s sideburns…

koji

Or the goofy “Silver Elvis” wig Scott Olsen was wearing that apparently Washington Nationals players have been wearing all season…

silverelvis

Welcome back Koji. You can keep the sideburns, just don’t ever do what the Nats do.

4. The AP’s Rob Maaddi says Hall of Fame pitcher, former Oriole Robin Roberts passed away at 83

The news probably hit Jim Palmer as hard as anyone yesterday, as Roberts was a mentor to Cakes when the two were roommates early in Palmer’s career.

For obvious reasons, I don’t remember Robin Roberts as an Oriole, nor do I remember any of his MLB career. That being said, Roberts was an outstanding pitcher-and he clearly made an impact on Palmer, spurring his own HOF career. For that, I’m particularly grateful.

5. The Sun’s Dean Jones Jr. says Josh Bell homered, Chorye Spoone struggled for O’s on farm

And before we move on-a couple of things:

A. The Orioles and Twins are back at it tonight; first pitch from Target Field is at 8:10pm on MASN2. Kevin Millwood is slated to face Francisco Liriano-who has been UNREAL this season. If the Orioles lose just ONE of the next 3 games, I get a chinese lunch from Drew Forrester. I’m rooting for them to not lose ANY of them.

B. Congratulations to our “Apologists of the Morning”, as selected by “The Great Arbitrator” this morning on AM1570 WNST’s “The Morning Reaction.” Scott Garceau and Jeremy Conn had Andy MacPhail on their show yesterday on 105.7, and a softball game broke out. They included such gems as “it’s no fun losing, huh?” and “You probably didn’t expect to see Lou Montanez in Centerfield this year, did you?”

Jennie Finch would have been proud…

jenniefinch

6. National Football Post’s Aaron Wilson says Reed, Ngata, Washington, Webb, Nakamura won’t participate in Owings Mills this weekend; Oher expected to work at LT

Yay! Mini-camp!

Ugh.

After getting about 2 hours of sleep so I could see Iron Man last night, I’m going to be about as excited to stand out there and watch Donte’ Stallworth catch balls as I would be to go down to Camden Yards at this point in the season.

And of course John Harbaugh will actually let us watch all of practice this weekend, the one time of the year when I have no interest in actually watching all of practice.

Obviously, there are plenty of things to pay attention to. We’ll have to see just how serious the Ravens may be about flipping Michael Oher and Jared Gaither. We’ll also be watching to see how the snaps are divided at WR behind Anquan Boldin, Derrick Mason and Stallworth. On top of that, we’ll watch to see how quickly guys like Terrence Cody and Sergio Kindle adapt to Greg Mattison’s defense.

And then we’ll remember that it is May 7th.

Football season can’t come quickly enough.

7. BaltimoreRavens.com’s Mike Duffy says Paul Kruger to work exclusively at DE during weekend minicamp at 1 Winning Drive

This will be something else worth watching this weekend. As I mentioned the other day, there is a TON of depth at LB for this team going into Training Camp, which makes this move seem like it may pay off. Of course, we’ll have to see if Kruger’s bulked up frame really translates into more “oomph” if you will, as the team can use ANY HELP THEY CAN GET when it comes to getting to the quarterback.

Well, any help besides Lawrence Taylor that is.

What? Too soon?

8. The Tennessean’s Jim Wyatt says former Ravens CB Samari Rolle will officially retire from NFL

As I said before, Samari is in the Derrick Mason/Rod Woodson/Trevor Pryce/Michael McCrary mix amongst the greatest free agent signings in Ravens history.

Similarly, Sara Galimberti is in the mix amongst the greatest track athletes in the history of Italy (Thanks Busted Coverage!)…

sara

9. LoyolaGreyhounds.com previews tomorrow afternoon’s showdown with Johns Hopkins at Ridley Athletic Complex

It isn’t quite Morgan State-Coppin State basketball, but this really is a great example of BALTIMORE college sports. Both teams have a lot on the line, as JHU can’t make the NCAA Tournament without a win, and Loyola could be in Tournament danger with a loss.

(Edit from GMC: They’ll make the Tournament with a loss, but they’ll be a LONG way away from the Final Four sleeper status many of us felt they had attained weeks ago).

I’m stoked. I know Chris Bonetti is stoked. What the hell else are you going to do tomorrow? Lay out on the beach in Ocean City and check out chicks? Lame…

Oh wait, no. No, that’s not lame at all. But not as cool as the Greyhounds and Blue Jays. A game that you can hear right here on AM1570 WNST.

10. The Sun’s Mike Preston says onus on Towson attack to top Delaware tomorrow in CAA Tournament final

And with the improved play of Travis Love in the cage for the Tigers, I would tend to agree with Mike.

If you missed Tigers coach Tony Seaman on with Drew this morning, check out the BuyAToyota.com Audio Vault at the top of the page.

I suggest you go to Loyola-Hopkins, then haul down Charles Street to check out Towson-Delaware.

I also suggest you check out pictures of Edurne Garcia from FHM Spain, and give a tip of the cap to Guyism for passing them along to us…

edurne

11. Daily Racing Form’s David Grening says Schoolyard Dreams could challenge Super Saver in Preakness

Most of my schoolyard dreams involved Topanga of course…

topanga

And finally, I leave you with this…

How I forgot to post the Ke$ha intro from The Simpsons last weekend is beyond me. I will correct that mistake now.

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hbnIgpcEIjQ[/youtube]

Flexing my mic muscles since 1983…

-G

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Wednesday Morning’s Crabs and Beer

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Wednesday Morning’s Crabs and Beer

Posted on 05 May 2010 by Glenn Clark

Happy Wednesday!

It’s a Happy Wednesday for me because last night was the annual “Undie Run” at Arizona State University. As someone who lived right down the street from ASU for two years, I can’t even BEGIN to explain what a good idea this is…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nRtPVxoB4AA[/youtube]

The failure to copy this idea at Towson University is absolutely UNTHINKABLE. The University of Maryland is putting together their first ever Undie Run in 6 days, and they’ll have a lot to live up to…

asuundir

Let’s see what everyone has to say…

1. The AP says AJ Burnett shut down Orioles as Yankees won 4-1

AJ Burnett is a hell of a pitcher. He might not be Roy Halladay, but he’s pretty damn good.

That being said-it is UNACCEPTABLE to have runners on 2nd & 3rd base with no outs and then see Adam Jones, Nick Markakis and Matt Wieters strike out. It’s just unacceptable. There’s no other way to put it.

What Gary Thorne, Mike Flanagan and Ben McDonald said during the MASN broadcast was telling however. With runners and 2nd and 3rd with none out, the pressure in that situation was somehow on the Orioles hitters and NOT on Burnett.

How could it have EVER come to this?

ALL of the pressure was on the Orioles hitters. Instead of going to the plate and thinking “cool, another spot to drive in some more runs”, Orioles hitters were thinking something along the lines of “oh dear God I better get a hit here because I have no idea if we’ll ever get a chance like this again!”

How telling was it that in the bottom of the inning; after Jones misplayed Francisco Cervelli’s single into a triple; Dave Trembley decided to pull the infield in.

In the THIRD inning.

Watching the Orioles is slightly less fun than going to the dentist at this point.

2. The AP/WNST.net offer numerical evidence of loss

Maybe I’m the one responsible for this. I went away to hang out at the Kentucky Derby over the weekend, and the Orioles swept the Red Sox in 3 games I couldn’t even watch on TV. I’ve been able to actually SEE the O’s win exactly FOUR games this season!

FOUR!

The Orioles had no RBI at all last night, and haven’t driven a runner in from scoring position YET through two games at Yankee Stadium.

Brian Matusz was by no means bad last night, although he did walk in a run.

It’s just like a continuous nightmare.

I know what will brighten our spirits….a picture of Serinda Swan from BarstoolSports.com…

serinda

…yep, I feel better already.

3. WNST.net’s Glenn Clark uncomfortably says Birds ‘could learn from’ Washington Nationals

And believe it or not, it ISN’T just by putting a Ben’s Chili Bowl inside the stadium…

benschilibowl

I seriously credit Nats President Stan Kasten for saying the right thing when asked about low attendance. When you have a bad product (like the Nationals HAVE had; and the Orioles certainly DO have), it’s YOUR fault. YOU need to fix it.

And if Dave Trembley just said the wrong thing out of frustration when asked about attendance, Andy MacPhail just just make a statement to “correct” him.

Or the team can keep allowing the fans to be blamed for the bad product. That’s a good idea too.

4. The AP says former Tigers, O’s broadcaster Ernie Harwell dead at 92

While Ernie Harwell has very LITTLE to do with Baltimore, it is certainly worth discussing this. Harwell represented what fans used to LOVE about baseball-especially in towns like Baltimore. He will be SORELY missed.

Just try watching this without tearing up. Ernie Harwell was a SPECIAL man…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=paWJl3qpUIM[/youtube]

5. The Sun’s Dean Jones Jr. says Robert Andino, Josh Bell, Zach Britton, Billy Rowell all had big nights on farm

And before we move on from the Orioles, a few things…

-If you missed Zach Britton on with Drew Forrester this morning on “The Morning Reaction” on AM1570 WNST; you can check it out in the BuyAToyota.com Audio Vault at WNST.net.

-Congratulations to today’s “Apologist of the Morning”, Steve Melewski from MASN. He wrote a great piece talking about how Luke Scott had a better slugging percentage than Brian Roberts last year-so we should defend Scott’s poor play this season.

That’s right. Luke Scott’s slugging percentage was better than the team’s leadoff hitter last year. That makes him a good player who deserves to keep his spot in the lineup.

Christ.

-The O’s and Yanks are back at it this afternoon in The Bronx; with David Hernandez facing licensed Orioles killer Andy Pettitte. First pitch is at 1:05pm. Follow us on Twitter (@WNST) during the game for humorous updates.

6.Carroll County Times’ Aaron Wilson says Elizabeth City State WR Reggie Smith to try out with Ravens this weekend

Cool!

But…uh…what the hell is Elizabeth City State?

I mean, if it was Elizabeth BERKLEY City State I might be a bit more interested…

berkley

(Edit from GMC: I love NO ONE more than I love Jessie Spano. Okay, maybe Topanga. But that’s it.)

For the record, Smith is a 5’11″ receiver who put up good numbers in college. If he shows up in Owings Mills again after this weekend, I’d be STUNNED.

7. BaltimoreRavens.com’s Mike Duffy says Edgar Jones switching back to OLB

Maybe they should just throw him in the kicking competition too while they’re at it???

The Ravens have a TON of depth at linebacker. Terrell Suggs is backed up by Paul Kruger; Ray Lewis and Dannell Ellerbe are backed up by Tavares Gooden, Antwan Barnes, Jameel McClain, Jason Phillips, Prescott Burgess and Brendon Ayanbadejo; and Jarret Johnson is backed up by Sergio Kindle. Now add Edgar Jones to that mix.

I don’t think they’ll all be in East Rutherford the night the Ravens play the Jets.

If you missed Ravens center Matt Birk or QB Coach Jim Zorn with Drew this morning, they’re both up in the Audio Vault.

8. The Sun’s Katherine Dunn says Notre Dame Prep lacrosse beat St. Stephen’s and St. Agnes in honor of former teammate Yeardley Love

I haven’t had a chance to say much about the tragic situation at Virginia, and I probably won’t say much about it here, as we are MUCH too light-hearted for poignancy. The Cavaliers are probably doing the right thing by playing in the NCAA Tournament, but you can’t imagine it won’t have an impact.

“The Luckiest Dang Gal on the Face of the Planet” is a NDP grad, and I know the community there has been TERRIBLY shook by the news. Prayers for all of them and blessings to the Love family.

9. UMBCRetrievers.com previews tonight’s America East Tournament semifinal against Albany at UMBC Stadium

For as bad a start as Don Zimmerman’s Retrievers got off to this season, they have a realistic chance of making the NCAA Tournament-although they would likely have to play the conference championship game at Stony Brook this weekend.

They certainly have a better chance of making the NCAA Tournament than I do of getting to know Tulisa Contostavlos on a more personal level (Thanks Guyism!)…

tulisa

10. TowsonTigers.com previews tonight’s CAA Tournament semifinal against UMass at Unitas Stadium

The Tigers also HAVE to win their conference tournament to make the NCAA Tournament, although it isn’t quite as steep a climb. They’ll be able to host the Championship game Saturday should they win tonight.

In a completely unrelated story, former Oregon cheerleader Amanda Pflugard is apparently a model now. I thought this was important enough to pass along (Thanks Busted Coverage!)…

pflugard

11. Daily Racing Form’s Marty McGee says Bob Baffert working with Lookin At Lucky in Louisville before making decision on Preakness

Rumor has it that when asked about what he’ll do differently this time after failing to win at Churchill Downs; I believe he may have said…”Well I’m sure as hell not going to talk to that clown Glenn Clark before the race this time.”

And finally, I leave you with this…

Happy Cinco de Mayo!!!!

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xEjOIVkvAIo[/youtube]

Flexing my mic muscles since 1983…

-G

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Hell Freezes Over: Orioles Could Learn From…Gulp…Nationals

Posted on 04 May 2010 by Glenn Clark

This is particularly painful for me to write. As you know, I have absolutely NO positive feelings for the sports franchises in Washington-be it the Redskins, Capitals, Nationals or Wizards. My disdain for the Skins has lead to me despising all of the other teams that have the name “Washington” in front of the team name. As someone was born and grew up in Baltimore, I’ve been told that Baltimore was a “DC suburb” one too many times to EVER support ANYTHING that started with the word “Washington.”

Disliking the Washington Nationals hasn’t been particularly easy during their short history, as the Nats franchise has been mostly irrelevant since their inception. They finished .500 in their first year at RFK Stadium, and they got about a month’s worth of traction when the new Nationals Park opened, and a few days worth of traction when they drafted Stephen Strasburg.

Other than those times, the Nationals have struggled to garner any interest-even in their home town. Sports radio stations in DC rarely devote any team to Nationals discussion, and their flagship (WFED) is a news talk station, which prohibits them from spending the day promoting the baseball team. Their TV rights are owned by Peter Angelos, and his MASN TV network does little to help the Nationals gain traction. Their only “live” programming is a simulcast of a radio show in Baltimore.

There are of course bigger problems than that within the District. There was no guarantee when Major League Baseball moved the Montreal Expos to DC that the market was even ready for baseball. Even if the market was ready for a MLB franchise, there was no guarantee that a transient city would show passionate support for the team within the market. To this day, there remains a large number of Washington DC (and surrounding area) residents who choose to root for the Orioles, or the Philadelphia Phillies, or the New York Yankees, or the team in the city they were they were born.

With that in mind, the Washington Nationals have began the 2010 baseball season looking like a legitimate team. A 13-12 start might not be earth shattering in a number of cities, but in the District of Columbia, it is a real reason to be interested. Moreover, the team stands just one game out of first place in the NL East-and could realistically threaten to surge past the likes of the New York Mets and Atlanta Braves this season.

On top of that, the team has the appearance of being able to extend their decent start for at least some amount of time. They have a solid lineup-including young superstar Ryan Zimmerman, power-hitting outfielder Adam Dunn, and potential Hall of Fame catcher Ivan Rodriguez. They also have a steady leadoff man in Nyjer Morgan, and have gotten contributions from Josh Willingham and Cristian Guzman.

Their pitching will likely be their undoing, unless Livan Hernandez continues to pitch at a Cy Young Award level. However, Stephen Strasburg will almost certainly reach the big leagues at around the same time Matt Wieters did a season ago; and he could give the staff a shot in the arm to help keep them respectable.

Bottom line-there’s a chance the Washington Nationals could be playing important baseball games after the All-Star Game this season.

Even so, fans haven’t exactly started streaming in to Nats Park. “Nats Fever” has yet to reach epidemic status in our nation’s capital. In fact, the team has averaged just 19,777 fans through 13 home games-inflated by an series against the Phils the week of Opening Day. They currently rank 25th amongst 30 Major League Baseball teams in terms of home attendance; despite being one of the Top 10 markets in the country.

For perspective-the Orioles (who won just 7 of their first 25 games this season) are 19th in attendance; averaging 24,163 fans per home game-numbers also likely inflated by home series against both the Yankees and Red Sox.

When asked about the small crowds at Camden Yards, O’s manager Dave Trembley had an interesting response last week:

“This is your team.  This is your city.  If you love your team, you love them through good times and bad times.  And you’ll want to be here when they turn things around.  This is our ballclub.  This is our city.  We’re very proud.”

Trembley directly faulted the fans for their choice to stay away from OPACY. He immediately used terms like “your” and “you’ll”.

Nationals team President Stan Kasten recently made an appearance on “The Mike Wise Show” on 106.7 WJFK in DC. Show co-host Holden Kushner used his Twitter account to post Kasten’s responses. Kasten was asked about HIS team’s attendance problems during the interview, and he gave THIS response…

“When we do OUR job, they’ll (the fans) come out”.

Interesting. Kasten didn’t use “your” or “you’ll”, but instead chose to say “we” and “our” first.

This is absolutely one of the BIGGEST problems facing the Orioles organization right now.

In DC, the leadership of the organization is looking to work WITH the fans to fix the problems that have plagued their organization. They want to make appearances on non-rightsholding radio stations, they want to accept blame for the disconnect within the market, and they’re not angry that the fans have decided to stay away.

The leadership of the Orioles decided to raise ticket prices, charge ticket premiums, continue to lose, and then directly blame the fans for the decision to stay away.

I like to consider myself a problem solver. I’ve been in a relationship now for nearly 2 years with a very pretty girl, and we’re the same age. We often disagree on a number of things. When I have a problem with something she does, I try to address it immediately. Unfortunately, she sometimes responds by saying something like “I’m sorry you feel that way.” My immediate response to that is always the same thing-”Don’t ever apologize for my feelings. If you think you did something wrong, apologize for that. If you don’t think you did anything wrong, don’t apologize-just explain youself, and let’s work together to solve the problem.

Our disagreements are remarkably civil after that.

The Orioles have every opportunity to do exactly that. They clearly don’t want to apologize for 13 seasons of losing and becoming a civic embarrassment. The next option is to give an explanation and work together with fans (who feel wronged) to solve the problem.

That’s apparently what they’re doing in DC.

God it pains me to realize that even THEY have moved ahead of the Orioles and into the realm of responsible, competent baseball organizations.

Maybe the Orioles can learn from the standard set.

-G

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Monday Morning’s Crabs and Beer

Posted on 29 June 2009 by Glenn Clark

I want to be surprised by the mistakes I continuously see the Orioles make; but it is particularly hard to be. Trembley’s lineup decisions are questionable at best (Andino-Jones makes WAY more sense to me 1-2 than Jones-Wigginton does); and it is tough to keep a team accountable when they aren’t really even that interested.

So are summers here in Birdland.

Let’s see what everyone else has to say……

Best of Sunday’s WNST Blogs:

Drew Forrester thinks Trembley deserves ‘blame’ for Birds’ mistakes

Glenn Clark thinks Trembley must be drinking before filling out Sunday lineup cards

Keith Melchior says Uehara ‘waste’ of money

Jerry Reinhardt says O’s making mistakes similar to ‘8-10 year olds’

Lawson Lambert ‘in love with’ Rachel Alexandra

ORIOLES:

The Official Site’s Brian Eller says Hernandez’s outing solid but Birds fell to Nationals

The Official Site provides numerical evidence of loss

The Official Site’s Brian Eller says Berken goes to mound for Birds tonight vs. Lester, Red Sox

The Official Site’s Spencer Fordin says Trembley gave Roberts day off Sunday

Nationals Official Site’s Bill Ladson says Lannan ‘ace’-like in win over O’s

Red Sox Official Site’s Ian Browne says Sox happy to move Ortiz back to DH vs. Birds with interleague play over

The Sun’s Dan Connolly says Huff, Wieters, Scott guilty of mistakes in loss

The Sun’s Dan Connolly says Uehara to be re-evaluated today, return not set yet

The Sun’s Dan Connolly says Birds finish season 11-7 vs. National League opponents

The Sun’s Kevin Cowherd says Birds fell to 3-9 on Sundays this season

The Sun’s Peter Schmuck attempts to defend Birds after loss (the “won 5 of last 9 games” thing was a stretch Pete….not exactly life-changing results there)

The Sun’s Peter Schmuck says Trembley needs to address ‘inept’ performance on basepaths

Carroll County Times’ Josh Land says 25,000 saw Nats top Birds at Camden Yards

Carroll County Times’ Josh Land says Zaun swinging hot bat since being replaced by Wieters in lineup

Washington Post’s Chico Harlan says Willie Harris added home run for Nats in win over Birds

Washington Post’s Dan Steinberg says Jim Palmer thought Huff’s homer ‘might be longest’ he’s seen at OPACY

Washington Times’ Mark Zuckerman says Acta ‘expected’ solid performance from Lannan vs. Birds

USA Today’s Jorge Ortiz says Wieters handling hype ‘in stride’

Fox Sports’ Jon Paul Morosi thinks Sherrill would ‘just miss’ All-Star Game

The Sports Network says Anderson Hernandez 3-4 with RBI in win for Nats

ORIOLES MINOR LEAGUES:

Norfolk Tides Official Site says 7th inning doomed Tillman in loss to Lehigh Valley

Bowie Baysox Official Site says Bascom hit hard in loss to Altoona

Frederick Keys Official Site says Zagone stellar early, but bullpen fell apart in loss to Wilmington

Delmarva Shorebirds Official Site says Travis Keating got win in relief as Shorebirds topped Lakewood

Aberdeen Ironbirds Official Site says Blake Davis homered for IronBirds in loss to Staten Island

The Sun’s Dean Jones Jr. says Kolodny homered twice for Shorebirds in win over BlueClaws

Virginian-Pilot says Michael Aubrey had only RBI for Tides in loss

RAVENS:

The Sun’s Jamison Hensley says Newsome still speaking about return to Alabama

TERRAPINS BASKETBALL:

Washington Times’ Patrick Stevens says Joe Smith 2nd best player of Gary’s 20 years

Washington Times’ Patrick Stevens says Juan Dixon greatest player of Gary’s 20 years

TERRAPINS WOMEN’S BASKETBALL:

The Diamondback’s Michael Lemaire says Mincy drawing comparisons to former Terp Marissa Coleman

NAVY FOOTBALL:

Go Mids’ Adam Nettina says Slotback Doyle not concerned with previews, projections

CRYSTAL PALACE USA:

The Official Site previews tonight’s showdown with Real Maryland

HORSE RACING:

Daily Racing Form’s David Grening says Rachel Alexandra went to Saratoga after winning Mother Goose Stakes

Daily Racing Form’s Steve Andersen says Zenyatta will race in Clement Hirsch Stakes at Del Mar next

Thoroughbred Times’ Mike Curry says trainer Steve Asmussen not interested in Rachel Alexandra-Zenyatta talk

The Sun says Saratoga will be Summer ‘base’ for Preakness champion Rachel Alexandra

TRACK AND FIELD:

The Sun says former Mervo hurdler James Carter announced retirement

GOLF:

Washington Times’ Barker Davis says Congressional has ‘sexy new look’ for this year’s AT&T National

Washington Examiner’s Kevin Dunleavy wonders if defending champ Anthony Kim will be ‘renewed’ at AT&T National

SOME QUICK THOUGHTS:

-While I think we all have known about Ozzie Newsome’s desire to return to Alabama for some time; I find it interesting that he is again speaking about it. The Crimson Tide may well need an athletic director in the near (or not-so near) future; and Newsome could be the guy. But it isn’t the type of thing I’d be too concerned about right now.

Talk to you tomorrow.

-G

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Friday Morning’s Crabs and Beer

Posted on 26 June 2009 by Glenn Clark

Just a tad difficult to get excited about the “Battle of the Beltways” this weekend after the Orioles put together an effort like that this week in Miami. I guess there will be a good atmosphere at the ballpark, but why?

David Hernandez SHOULD make Sunday’s start. What would be the point of forcing Uehara to go out there?

Let’s see what everyone else has to say….

Best of Thursday’s WNST Blogs:

Drew Forrester thinks no more than 5,000 fans attended Marlins win in Miami

Thyrl Nelson understands Ravens’ lack of interest in Brandon Marshall

Luke Jones says Ravens picks Webb, Drew, Peerman, Phillips all signed

Marco Romanell says Dunbar alums showed off “Pride” at movie screening

Bob Haynie says “Born Ready” wants ‘love’

Drew Forrester misses “Merton from Indianapolis”

Jerry Reinhardt wonders if Michael Aubrey could be Birds’ Adrian Gonzalez

ORIOLES:

The Official Site’s Spencer Fordin says Rich Hill hammered as Marlins finished off sweep of Birds

The Official Site provides numerical evidence of sweep

The Official Site’s Spencer Fordin says Bergesen gets call tonight for Birds against Detweiler, Nats

The Official Site’s Spencer Fordin says Uehara set to visit orthopedist today

Marlins Official Site’s Jeff Shain says Ramirez capped off sweep with grand slam

Nationals Official Site’s Bill Ladson says Elijah Dukes hoping to get bat going against Birds

The Sun’s Jeff Zrebiec says 12,822 saw Fish sweep O’s at Land Shark Stadium

The Sun’s Jeff Zrebiec says Hobgood in Baltimore; expected to sign Friday, get OPACY introduction Saturday

The Sun’s Jeff Zrebiec says Joe Jordan thinks Hobgood contract about ‘done’ pending physical

The Sun’s Peter Schmuck humorously quips Nationals Park taking Red Sox fans away from O’s

The Sun’s Peter Schmuck says success vs. Nats depends on which Birds ‘show up’

The Sun’s Peter Schmuck didn’t understand Trembley’s use of Ray in loss

The Sun’s Peter Schmuck ‘conflicted’ about Pie

The AP says Chris Ray touched up for grand slam as Birds lost

Washington Times’ Danny Daly says Birds not ‘pressing’ Wieters

Washington Times’ Tim Lemke says Birds, Nats looking for ‘positive momentum’ this weekend

Miami Herald’s Manny Navarro says Ross, Uggla homered for Marlins in win

South Florida Sun-Sentinel’s Juan Rodriguez says Sean West threw 6 shutout innings in win for Fish

Palm Beach Post’s Joe Capozzi says Marlins now 10-5 vs. American League teams after sweep

ORIOLES MINOR LEAGUES:

Orioles Official Site’s Spencer Fordin says Tillman, Matusz participating in All-Star Futures Game

Norfolk Tides Official Site says Brandon Snyder had double, triple, 2 RBI; but Tides fell to Pawtucket

Bowie Baysox Official Site says Liz went 7 shutout innings as Baysox blanked Binghamton

Frederick Keys Official Site says Widlansky picked up game-winning RBI for Keys in win over Winston-Salem

Delmarva Shorebirds Official Site says Travis Keating gets win in relief as Shorebirds topped Lakewood

Aberdeen Ironbirds Official Site says Kantakevich took loss as Ironbirds fell to Brooklyn

The Sun’s Dean Jones Jr. says Caleb Joseph homered for Keys in win

The Sun’s Dean Jones Jr. says former Oriole John Maine to start for Cyclones vs. Aberdeen Saturday

Frederick News-Post’s Stan Goldberg says Tyler Henson got 2 hits in win playing LF for 2nd time ever

Virginian-Pilot’s Kyle Tucker says Pauley hit hard in Tides’ loss to Red Sox

RAVENS:

The Official Site says rookie CB Lardarius Webb inks 3 year deal

The Official Site’s Mike Duffy says ‘character’ issue for Ravens in pursuit of big-play WR

The Sun’s Jamison Hensley says former Nicholls State CB Webb got roughly $530,000 signing bonus

The Sun’s Jamison Hensley says Harbaugh thinks Webb ‘showed he belonged’

Carroll County Times’ Aaron Wilson says Oher, Kruger only unsigned Ravens draft picks

NFL.com’s Steve Wyche says Ravens ‘love’ Kruger’s hustle

ESPN.com’s James Walker says Ravens, Steelers each among 5 best teams of decade

TERRAPINS BASKETBALL:

The Diamondback’s Aaron Kraut says Smith, Francis, Bias amongst most memorable NBA Draft moments for Terps

The Diamondback’s Aaron Kraut says former Terp Gist plans to go to San Antonio Sunday to start working out with Spurs

Washington Times’ Patrick Stevens says Lonny Baxter 6th best player of Gary’s 20 years

Washington Times’ Patrick Stevens says Steve Blake 5th best player of Gary’s 20 years

Terrapin Times’ Dan Painter says legacy prospect Jonathan Graham battling knee injuries (must subscribe)

Terrapin Times’ Dan Painter says Stoglin ran pickup games with Vasquez, Tucker, Hayes during visit to College Park (must subscribe)

TERRAPINS FOOTBALL:

ESPN.com’s Heather Dinich says Wujciak developing into role as ‘leader’

Terrapin Times’ Mark Clem says Terps offered Niceville (FL) WR prospect Kody Williams (must subscribe)

NAVY FOOTBALL:

The Official Site says players to sign autographs at Camden Yards tonight

The Official Site recaps season for all Midshipmen teams

Go Mids’ David Ausiello breaks down questions for Mids in ’09 (must subscribe)

NAVY LACROSSE:

The Official Site says 6 Mids honored by Patriot League for academics

HOPKINS LACROSSE:

Inside Lacrosse’s John Jiloty compares former Jay Rabil’s hot start in MLL to other MLL greats

UMBC LACROSSE:

The Official Site says Blevins, Kimener amongst graduating Retrievers

LOYOLA BASKETBALL:

The Sun says former Hounds coach Brian Ellerbe joins staff at George Washington

BALTIMORE MARINERS:

The Official Site says coach Chris Simpson not concerned about playing two games in 6 days

BLAST:

Examiner Richard Crabbe goes over Blast history

HORSE RACING:

Daily Racing Form’s David Grening says Rachel Alexandra running against girls again in Mother Goose Stakes

HIGH SCHOOL BASKETBALL:

LA Times’ Mark Medina says former Calvert Hall star McClinton drafted by Spurs

The Sun’s Kevin Van Valkenburg says former McDonough star DeJuan Summers selected by Pistons

Washington Times’ Patrick Stevens wonders if Summers made right decision in leaving Georgetown year early

HIGH SCHOOL LACROSSE:

The Sun’s Glenn Graham says 5 Gilman players headline Under Armour All-American Game at Unitas Stadium

SOME QUICK THOUGHTS:

-Please go out and support some of the events going on in the community this weekend. Tomorrow at Poly Keion Carpenter and Antonio Freeman have their Celebrity Flag Football game, and tomorrow at Towson Center Kurk Lee and Sam Cassell are doing their annual charity hoops game. Plus, tomorrow night at Unitas Stadium is the Under Armour All-American Lacrosse Game. So much going on. And then there’s the Orioles-Nationals series. Um, yay?

Talk to you this weekend.

-G

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Thursday Morning’s Crabs and Beer

Posted on 25 June 2009 by Glenn Clark

Do you want me to say something about Felix Pie? I already have. He has no business here. It’s borderline embarrassing. Joey Gathright can do the things Felix Pie does (and Joey Gathright is not a particularly good player either).

Do you want me to say something about Koji Uehara? I’ve already said plenty. The guy should go to the bullpen. It is tough to pay someone $5 million and then use them in relief; but it is tougher to watch a guy who physically can’t pitch the number of innings that are required from a pitcher.

Do you want me to say something about the Orioles? I’d much rather talk about soccer or Transformers.

Let’s see what everyone else has to say…..

Best of Wednesday’s WNST Blogs:

Luke Jones says Birds’ talent ‘improved’, but team still making ‘mistakes’

Thyrl Nelson wonders if O’s ‘owe’ Roberts anything

Drew Forrester not surprised to hear Uehara dealing with ‘fatigue’

Jason Jubb says Birds’ recent moves appear to set up Aubrey Huff trade

Bob Haynie says Birds stockpiling “Aubreys”

Marco Romanell says Adam Jones mired in funk

Keith Melchior wonders if Trembley has ‘earned’ right to return to Birds

Ed Frankovic says Brashear apparently not in Caps’ plans for next season

ORIOLES:

The Official Site’s Spencer Fordin says errors, defensive mistakes cost Birds in loss to Marlins

The Official Site provides numerical evidence of loss

The Official Site’s Spencer Fordin says Rich Hill toes mound for Birds in attempt to avoid sweep against Sean West, Marlins

The Official Site’s Spencer Fordin says Salazar showing value at big league level

Marlins Official Site’s Joe Frisaro says Nolasco dazzled for Fish in win over O’s

The Sun’s Jeff Zrebiec says Trembley appeared to be ‘losing patience’ with Pie after mistakes in loss

The Sun’s Jeff Zrebiec says Markakis picked up AL-leading 8th assist in loss, throwing out Hermida at plate

The Sun’s Jeff Zrebiec says Birds worked out 16 year old SS prospect Sano in Dominican Republic

The Sun’s Jeff Zrebiec says Uehara could miss next start with ‘elbow fatigue’

The Sun’s Kevin Cowherd says Birds bad, but not as bad as Nats

The AP says Cody Ross, Hanley Ramirez each drove in 2 as Marlins topped Orioles

Miami Herald’s Clark Spencer says Fish back over .500 after win

South Florida Sun-Sentinel’s Juan Rodriguez says Dan Meyer pitched 9th for save with Lindstrom on DL for Marlins

Palm Beach Post’s Joe Capozzi says Bonifacio showed off hustle in scoring run on Pie’s blunder

USA Today has Birds 23rd in power rankings

ORIOLES MINOR LEAGUES:

Norfolk Tides Official Site says Brandon Snyder lead Tides with 3 hits, 2 RBI in win over Pawtucket

Bowie Baysox Official Site says Perrault blew save as Binghamton rallied to top Baysox

Aberdeen Ironbirds Official Site says Garabez Rosa tallied walkoff hit in 10th in win over Staten Island

The Sun’s Dean Jones Jr. says David Hernandez went 4 perfect innings, got no decision for Tides in win

The Sun’s Dean Jones Jr. says Shorebirds’ Zagone promoted to Frederick

The Sun’s Dean Jones Jr. says Birds trade for Indians prospect Aubrey, expect to assign him to Norfolk

The Sun’s Dean Jones Jr. says first round pick Hobgood honored by USA Today

Frederick News-Post says Keys’ Florimon tripled, scored run in Carolina League All-Star Game

Virginian-Pilot’s Rainer Sabin says Hernandez pulled after 4 in case O’s need him to make Uehara’s next start

RAVENS:

The Official Site’s Mike Duffy breaks down competition for CB jobs

The Official Site says Ravens, M&T Bank team up for annual Honor Rows Program

The Sun’s Jeff Barker says Ravens fans pocketing profit from PSL sales

ESPN.com’s James Walker says Flacco ‘better’ this season

TERRAPINS FOOTBALL:

The Official Site checks in with former Terp, Seahawks UFA Dave Philistin

The Sun’s Matt Bracken says commit Delic improved stock by putting on weight

Yahoo! Sports’ Charles Robinson says former Terp Merriman ‘on mission’

Terrapin Times’ Mark Clem says Milford Mill WR Cheeseboro ‘really likes’ Terps (must subscribe)

Terrapin Times’ Mark Clem breaks down LB’s with Seamonson (must subscribe)

TERRAPINS BASKETBALL:

The Sun’s Jeff Barker thinks Terps ‘could be’ Top 25 team

Washington Times’ Patrick Stevens says Steve Francis 8th best player of Gary’s 20 years

Washington Times’ Patrick Stevens says Johnny Rhodes 7th best player of Gary’s 20 years

Inside MD Sports’ Seth Hoffman says Stoglin finally made first visit to future home College Park

Scout.com’s Evan Daniels says not everyone surprised with rise of target Justin Coleman (must subscribe)

TERRAPINS WOMEN’S BASKETBALL:

The Official Site offers opportunity to camp with Frese, players

The Diamondback’s Brian Kapur says former Terp Langhorne improved in 2nd season with Mystics

The Diamondback’s Brian Kapur says Langhorne, Toliver, Coleman, Frese were all reunited last weekend for WNBA game at Verizon Center

The Diamondback’s Michael Lemaire says Mincy joins Alyssa Thomas, Natasha Cloud in Terps’ class of 2010

Washington Post’s Camille Powell says Mincy ranked 13th best prospect by ESPNU

Terrapin Times’ Dan Painter says two years of recruiting finally landed Mincy in College Park (must subscribe)

NAVY FOOTBALL:

The Official Site says trip to Ohio State gets noon kickoff, ESPN treatment

Washington Times’ Patrick Stevens says Mids have just two games left on schedule without kickoff time determined

TOWSON FOOTBALL:

The Official Site says opener at Northwestern gets noon kickoff, Big Ten Network treatment

CRYSTAL PALACE USA:

Examiner Jeff Hemelt says Val Teixeira honored by USL-2

HORSE RACING:

Daily Racing Form’s David Grening says Preakness winner Rachel Alexandra won’t run in Breeders’ Cup

Thoroughbred Times’ Steve Bailey says owner Jess Jackson nixes possible showdown between Rachel Alexandra, Zenyatta on ‘plastic’ surface at Santa Anita

Thoroughbred Times’ Mike Curry says after skipping Belmont Stakes, Rachel Alexandra makes track debut in Mother Goose Stakes

The AP says Borel supportive of Jackson’s decision to keep Rachel Alexandra off synthetic tracks

SWIMMING:

The AP says Phelps nominated for 4 ESPY Awards

GOLF:

The Sun says Fred Funk commits to Constellation Energy Classic

Washington Examiner’s Kevin Dunleavy says Funk finished 2nd at last year’s Constellation Energy Classic

SOME QUICK THOUGHTS:

-I’ve never been to the Horseshoe before. I doubt that will change when Navy visits Ohio State; but I’m certainly tempted. A trip to Berkley probably will be out of the question given the expenses I’ve taken on in buying a new whip (thanks Koons Ford); but a trip to Columbus sounds like a lot of fun.

Talk to you tomorrow.

-G

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15-7-0

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15-7-0

Posted on 01 June 2009 by Glenn Clark

I was gonna write something about how I actually enjoyed watching Forrest Whitaker doing Andy Samberg’s “Dick in a Box” at the MTV Movie Awards, but when I would have to admit that I watched the MTV Movie Awards. Which I refuse to do. And want the last 3 hours of my life back….

You get props…..

1. Luke Scott and Matt Wieters

Let me start by saying this. If anyone else says as much as a WORD to me about the “Baby Birds”, there will be violence involved. I get it, the Orioles called a bunch of guys up; and Matt Wieters is absolutely going to be the greatest athlete in the history of sports. No really; I thought it was awesome how he hit 10 home runs, threw a perfect game, answered the Ravens’ receiver questions, got rid of the corruption in the Dixon administration, solved the downtown violence issues, saved the Baltimore Sun, and got both sides of the argument to come together on the whole gay marriage issue during his first weekend. Okay, maybe he hasn’t done all of that yet; but trust me he’s going to. And if you don’t own this T-shirt; you’re not a good person….

wieters

As far as Luke Scott goes, please insert your own “Is he using steroids?” joke here. I’ve got too much writing left to do to waste my time…..

2. Jimmie Johnson

So they went racing in Dover Sunday, and Jimmie Johnson won. Which is just as well. I mean, who did you want to win? Jimmy Carter? I don’t think he qualified. I’ll check again though. Didn’t they call Jimmy Carter “The Georgia Peanut”? I love peanuts. I enjoy Honey Roasted peanuts. Can you really roast honey? I brought honey into the bedroom once…….but my parents yelled at me and told me that it needed to stay in the kitchen. I hope my girlfriend cleans our kitchen soon. I know she doesn’t live here, but it’s not like we’re going to clean it. I clean my ears religiously…..basically every time I’m in the bathroom. Ears are good to have, because with out them it might be tough to hear. When I was younger, I could never tell when you were supposed to write the word “hear” and when you were supposed to write the word “here.” Being young is great……I feel old a lot. Do old people still get to play Wii?

Yeah, there’s still like a half of a season left for me to try to make NASCAR jokes. I’m gonna need some suggestions.

3. Dwight Howard and Kobe Bryant

Spare me the whole “this is what ESPN/the NBA get for putting together all of those Kobe/LeBron commercials.” Seriously, got over yourself. The Orlando Magic are about as entertaining to watch as the Real World/Road Rules Challenge “The Duel II” (okay, I take it back-I’d MUCH rather watch “The Duel.” No really, the Magic are putrid to watch. I mean, here’s Dwight Howard getting fouled. Now here’s Courtney Lee hitting a 3. Now here’s Hedo Turkoglu doing something awkward. CHRIST! And don’t bother telling me about how they play “team basketball.” If I wanted to watch “team basketball”, I would’ve watched the Finals the year San Antonio and Detroit played. But I didn’t, and neither did you. And frankly, if Orlando was playing San Antonio this year; you wouldn’t watch either. But you will, because it will now give you a chance to spew about how overrated Kobe Bryant is. Because, you know, what has Kobe Bryant ever done???

kobe

I meant, what has Kobe Bryant ever done without Shaq????

kobe

Get over yourselves people.

4. Justin Verlander and Edwin Jackson

Nothing like having a lineup full of hot hitters…….you know, other than having guys on your team who can actually pitch. The Tigers turned the Orioles’ “Best Week Ever” into a 4 game road split without batting an eyelash (I cannot confirm no eyelashes were batted), thanks in part to the Orioles rolling out their usual Sunday lineup. I thought it was a little strange that this Sunday’s lineup looked like this….

CF Jerome Walton
2B Mark McLemore
3B Tony Batista
DH David Segui (pre-steroids)
1B Kevin Millar
LF Marty Cordova
RF Jay Gibbons (post-steroids)
C Geronimo Gil
SS Brandon Fahey

5. Denis Menchov

Lance Armstrong didn’t win the Giro d’Italia; and I have no idea if he was supposed to win the damn thing or not. But Denis Menchov won; which I guess is neat-because he’s a white Russian. Now here’s a picture of The Big Lebowski drinking a White Russian; mostly because I think he’s cooler than you are.

menchov

6. Desmond Armstrong, Johnny Holliday and Missy Meharg

Somehow I was again left off the list of nominees for the University of Maryland Hall of Fame this year. I’m not going to get bitter about it; because I think Desmond Armstrong, Johnny Holliday, and Missy Meharg are all very deserving. However, I’m particularly surprised THIS great Terp didn’t make the list. I introduce you to “Trey”…..

ch

Trey is a unique candidate. His accomplishments mostly come from the field of passing out; where he holds the distinguished honor of having passed out at 74 different parties his freshman year. And it isn’t just the sheer number of times he passed out; it is also the many locations and ways he managed to pass out. He passed out three times in his own room (only once on his actual bed), 12 times elsewhere on the 6th floor of the Cumberland building (3 of those times someone actually noticed he was missing), and 14 times total in his actual building. He’s also passed out in 4 other dorm buildings on campus, as well as once inside the Diner after day drinking. It’s a long story, and not worth asking about. The telling statistic of Trey’s candidacy is the fact that he had over 14,000 different words and pictures written and drawn on him during the year, in a total of 20 different languages.

If that isn’t Hall of Fame worthy, I don’t know what is.

7. Oscar Salazar, Joe Nowicki, Brian Matusz and Pedro Florimon

Oscar Salazar has now hit 10 home runs this season for the Norfolk Tides. With that in mind, I hope you will consider purchasing my new T-shirt “When an opposing team sees Oscar Salazar come to the plate, there IS crying in baseball.”

(And that concludes my “MattWietersFacts.com” portion of the blog. You guys have been great. Stick around. You never know, I might actually start getting funny later.)

8. Mike Polk

You’re probably thinking to yourself “Glenn, who the hell is Mike Polk?” And that’s fair. But if you’re a die-hard reader of the 15-7-0 (I’m talking to you, mom); you’d actually be familiar with his work. You see, Mike Polk is the man who came up with these classics……

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ysmLA5TqbIY[/youtube]
[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oZzgAjjuqZM[/youtube]

And, after poking around the internet a bit; I managed to find this gem where Mike Polk does a great job of poking fun at himself….

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xVXLVLHAtf8[/youtube]

But apparently I’m not the only person who enjoys Mike Polk’s work. TNT actually commissioned Polk to make a video about TNT’s “Inside the NBA” crew…..

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R5frhFBGJ1U[/youtube]

And that’s brilliant. I may officially be developing what’s called a “man crush.” But not quite at the Forrester-Lowe level. At least not yet.

9. Serena Williams and Andy Roddick

Don’t look now, but there are TWO Americans left in Paris. And with that in mind; I pose this to you Baltimore. Who’s hotter??

Serena…..

serena

Or A-Rod……

arod

10. Adrian Gonzalez, Jason Bay, Ryan Howard and Albert Pujols

Adrian Gonzalez has hit 20 home runs this season. Think that’s impressive? Matt Wieters will have 25 by the end of the week. (I know, I promised. Sorry!!!!!)

In other baseball news this weekend, Ken Rosenthal reported that the Nationals have definitely decided to draft Stephen Strasberrg. (You see, it’s funny because the Nationals have a history of not being able to spell anything correctly).

In a related story, Stephen Strasburg decided to lose a game in hopes the Nats might reconsider. Not even his teammates could blame him.

11. Guus Hiddink

Chelsea won the FA Cup this weekend, and they have decided to let Hiddink consider other opportunities after a short tenure. Their rumored successor?…….

miller

When reached for comment, Peter Angelos said “This chapter is over. I wish him well.”

12. Justin Abdelkader

The Detroit Red Wings are up 2-0 in the Stanley Cup Finals; and if the Finals end in a sweep, what is arguably the most prestigious trophy in all of sports will be handed out after a game televised on VERSUS. In a recent poll, no one was outraged. However, 14% of sports fans polled did say “What’s the Stanley Cup?”

13. Brad Pitt, Megan Fox, and Mickey Rourke

Alex, I’ll take “Greatest Fantasy 3-ways in Porn history” for $400 please.

But seriously, Fox and Rourke won the biggest awards of the night at Saturday night’s taping of the Spike TV “Guys Choice Awards”; and Pitt took a stab at Mel Gibson by calling him “Sugar Tits.” Apparently that’s funny because Mel Gibson called a female cop that after being arrested; but I think it’s funny because I’m secretly a 13 year old boy, and I still giggle every time I hear someone say “tits.”

14. Whole Wheat Penne Genova at Sazzio

penne
(This isn’t pasta from Sazzio pictured; but it was actually impossible for me to find a pic of the actual stuff. Just go with it.)

Look, I didn’t think I’d like green pasta either. Frankly, I don’t enjoy much of anything that’s green……..ever. I mean, other than money; which I of course bathe myself in most days because I have so much of it. And of course boogers; which I have spent the better part of 26 years enjoying and leaving in random places throughout the world. But try to not think about boogers if you take a shot on the Genova (which is fancy talk for pesto there, Spud); or it might not be as enjoyable. Or maybe it will be just as enjoyable. I mean, what do I know about you anyway?

15. Pixar

up

I don’t know how else to say this, but “Up” was FANTASTIC. And I don’t mean fantastic in the way that “It’s as cute as Finding Nemo”, I mean, it was REALLY fantastic. It was compelling, it told a great story, the characters had depth, it was just an EXCELLENT film. Completely on par with anything I’ve seen in the last year (including flicks like “Pineapple Express”, “Star Trek”, and “The Wrestler”). No really, it was that good. I’d like for there to be a joke here, but I’ve got nothing. It was just outstanding. If I say “testicles”, will this somehow now be funny? I’ve got nothing else….

You got lucky…….

1. Chip Woolley

The girl is out. Calvin Borel is back on Mine That Bird, who might somehow actually be the favorite going into the Belmont; now that it’s just a Boys Club again. This reminds me of my favorite Berenstain Bears book, which might have been the smartest book title OF ALL TIME…….

bears

2. Roger Federer

Speaking of winning without actually having to try; Rafael Nadal is out-and Roger Federer now appears on track to finally win his first French Open. But for the record, I’ll be rooting for Spiderman here to win…..

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ar9hzqSZB4w[/youtube]

3. Steve Stricker

colonial

When you win the Masters, you get a Green Jacket that is the envy of everyone. When you win the Colonial, you get a jacket that NO ONE will buy even after you donate it to Goodwill two weeks later. When you win the Colonial thanks to a collapse by Tim Clark and a guy named Marino whose name is apparently not Dan, you’re Steve Stricker. Need I explain further? Good, because I don’t know anything else. In other golf news, Tiger Woods was seen sitting courtside at a Magic game with Hank Haney. If I knew why this was news; I’d tell you. I saw Ray Lewis sitting courtsude at a Magic game; is that news?

You know, since we’re talking golf, here’s a picture of Blair O’Neal. She’ll be on with Drew Monday morning, and is significantly more interesting than anything happening on any golf course anywhere……

oneal

4. Austin Wood

If you’re going to throw 12 1/3 innings and 169 pitches of no-hit relief, your team might as well win the game. And if you’re going to have the last name “Wood”, I’m going to have to giggle. Deal with it.

5. Charles Barkley

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1pppg9Cu2cs&feature=player_embedded[/youtube]

You know what’s funny? There is NO REASON why I should like Charles Barkley. He’s loud, obnoxious, offers little-to-no analysis, and is foul-mouthed. Making things worse, he calls his producer names like “pussy.”

Around here, we just call overweight, name-calling loudmouths “Forresters.”

AM I RIGHT???? HIGH FIVE!!!!!!!!

6. Alexandre Giroux

The Hershey Bears are up 1-0 in the Calder Cup Finals; which somehow might go longer than the Stanley Cup Finals. I could talk to you more about Minor League Hockey; but I’d rather share a childhood gripe. I love just about everything about the Hershey Corporation; but I have one favor to ask. Please, PLEASE suspend production of this candy bar around Halloween….

goodbar

It’s not even as though it’s that bad of a candy bar. It’s actually somewhat good. But just double production of Reese’s Cups and stop making Mr. Goodbars for like 3 months. Thanks everyone.

7. Jay Leno

So long Jay! No one under the age of 57 will miss you……

You’re a zero……

Ohio State Baseball

37-6????????

After the loss, the Buckeyes said it was okay because they’re not really trying to win until 2011.

-G

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15-7-0

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15-7-0

Posted on 25 May 2009 by Glenn Clark

Nothing like MASN to decide that the fans of the Orioles and Nationals probably don’t want to see their own broadcasters call the games, huh. I mean, why have Rob Dibble be a guest analyst during the Orioles’ broadcast when you can just pay one TV for the weekend? Nothing says money-saving quite like MASN. Ugh….

You deserve props…..

1. Danys Baez

If chicks dig the longball, then who digs the rally-starting dribbler? Ferrets? I’m glad Danys Baez has decided to be a contributor; because Chris Ray usually decides not to be.

2. Lyoto Machida

After beating previously undefeated Rashad Evans Saturday night at UFC 98, Lyoto Machida shouted “Karate’s Back”! I certainly hope so, because this guy has been looking for work for like 25 years…..

karate kid

3. Kobe Bryant

Remember how everyone spent the week talking about how LeBron James was a better player than Kobe Bryant? Can I remind you of a couple things???

A-Three rings
B-Kobe can SHOOT the ball (And spare me about how LeBron made one really big outside jumper)

LeBron James might go down as one of the greatest players in NBA History. But Kobe Bryant already has a Hall of Fame resume. Maybe getting ahead of ourselves isn’t the best idea in the world.

4. David Hernandez, Brandon Snyder, Troy Patton, Caleb Joseph

David Hernandez collected 14 strikeouts Friday night. Chris Ray has 15 on the season.

You know what what, maybe I’m piling on Chris Ray unfairly. Brad Bergesen has made 7 starts this season and only has 18 strikeouts. But I paid money to go to a baseball game Sunday, and I liked what I saw from Brad Bergesen. I didn’t like what I saw from Chris Ray.

Before I move on from this weekend’s O’s-Nats series, I’d like to thank the Mottram Brothers at Mister Irrelevant for posting this image of a hat I saw at Nationals Park.

os

Washington sports fans are TERRIBLE. And since I’m at it, I have to call out my friend Matt Palmer from The Catholic Review….

palmer

PICK A TEAM!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ROOT FOR THEM!!!!!!!!

5. Evgeni Malkin

You know how good the basketball playoffs are right now? The hockey playoffs are equally as bad. Like-you couldn’t pay me enough bad. I know everyone likes to tell me about how great the NHL regular season is, but the postseason has been about as exciting as this week’s PGA golf Tournament (which Rory Sabbatini apparently won-but I knew better than to think you cared).

6. Rob Pannell and Pat Perritt

So…..the lacrosse Final Four happened. Of course, since it happened in Boston and no teams from Maryland were involved, I didn’t care. Apparently no one else did, as attendance was down some 10,000 fans. Organizers said the drop in attendance was likely based on the decision to ban alcohol from the infield the economy. In a related story…..

boston

7. Frederick Cadets

I was going to write a joke here, but then I remembered that the name of the team was the Cadets. Let’s move on…..

8. Phil Dalhauser and Todd Rodgers

I know what you’re thinking. “It must have been a lame weekend if you had to include the results of a beach volleyball Tournament. But that’s where you’re wrong. I simply included this because I REALLY needed an excuse to finally include this picture in a blog…..

beach

9. Kenshin Kawakami, Gavin Floyd, Kyle Lohse, and Brandon McCarthy

And just in case Forrester is reading, here’s a picture of Derek Lowe…

lowe

Wait a second!!!! What’s that???? That’s Trinka Lowe!!! The lovely MRS. Derek Lowe! I’m sorry Drew…….

10. Scorpio Brown and Val Teixeira

BOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!

(Sorry, I heard someone say Teixeira)

11. C.W. Post and Cortland

Notable alums from Cortland, you ask? Try…..

foley

and….

blart

You see, it’s not all about lacrosse titles at Cortland! They gave us Paul Blart!

12. Mickael Pietrus

The NBA Playoffs…..where “WHO THE EFF IS MICKAEL PIETRUS?????” happens.

13. David Traver and Jack Passion

trav passion

The World Beard & Moustache Championships were held this weekend in Anchorage, Alaska. The fact that Rollie Fingers wasn’t invited should be subject of an international investigation, but I think these particular winners in the beard category were well deserving.

14. Ben’s Chili Bowl Half Smoke (All the Way)

bens

While DC, their teams, and their fans can all bite me; I will prefer to take a bite out of this monster, which was my lunch Sunday-and was absolutely DELICIOUS. It was a mix of pork, beef, chili, mustard, cheese, onions, special sauce, lettuce, cheese, pickes, onions on a sesame seed bun.

15. Memorial Day (and whoever it is we’re supposed to honor on this Holiday)

Is this the one for the trees?

(Edit from GMC: I’m KIDDING, people! I know this is the one that honors grandparents. You kick ass Pop Pop!)

You got lucky……

1. LeBron James

You want me to say something that would be more captivating than the highlight? Fat chance.

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=N8Ry–J8hwg[/youtube]

Of course, there might still be 2 or 3 of you that didn’t see this…..

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MvTsT_zPGm4[/youtube]

The NBA is like REALLY entertaining again. Thank God, because Baseball is really not.

2. Helio Castroneves

You mean to tell me you can go from the edge of prison to drinking milk and hanging with Danica Patrick in the span of less than a month? There’s hope for me after all!!!!! And did you know Helio Castroneves used to be on Dancing with the Stars? That reminds me that I’d rather be looking at a picture of Julianne Hough than talking about the Indianapolis 500…..

dance

Julianne Hough is reportedly on “Dancing With The Stars.” I say reportedly because admitting I watch Dancing with the Stars would make some of you question things about me. Things like, “what kind of food do you normally eat when you’re watching Dancing with the Stars?” The answer is ice cream.

3. Adam Dunn (as in….the Nationals are REALLY lucky to HAVE Adam Dunn)

Spare me the thing about the Orioles shouldn’t have signed him because he strikes out a lot. He wins games…..like the one I was watching today. The following hitters are all amongst the top 25 strikeout kings in baseball…..

grif reg
jack bigg
mantle rick

4. Meredith Frank, Katrina Dowd and the Northwestern Wildcats

I hate saying this: but women’s lacrosse is just awful. I mean, really painful to watch. Thankfully for me; Northwestern and Penn found a way to make this particular game slightly less unbearable to watch. The Quakers scored 4 goals in the final minute of regulation; and then scored a goal with 11 seconds left in overtime. But since women’s lacrosse DOESN’T have a golden goal rule for some reason; the game went on, and Dowd poked home a goal with less than a second left. Frank scored the golden goal in a later overtime, then Northwestern topped North Carolina for the championship Sunday. The entire weekend at Unitas Stadium included maybe 3 hits. And they came when I was punching Maryland media relations star Sam Angell for letting me watch a women’s lacrosse game. But he did bring Berger Cookies to RFK Stadium for out “Battle of the Beltways” tailgate. And he doesn’t root for two teams. Because he’s not a comunist.

5. Panathinaikos

You mean to tell me Nick Calathes is Greek???

calathes

I don’t see it.

6. Giles Simon

The 7th seed at the French Open had to go 5 sets to advance to the 2nd round. Another seeded player has already advanced to the 2nd round in my heart…..

roddick

And sadly that might be as far as he advances this week…….

7. Anyone who still remembers all the words at the end of the night at Howl at the Moon…..

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qV2RWK28bsY[/youtube]

By the way, I asked around; and this DOES kick ass after all…..

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y-eD-AQjByQ[/youtube]

You’re a zero……

Randy Starks

First Lonny Baxter shoots up the White House, now Randy Starks hits a cop with a truck. What’s next? Shay Doron sexually assaults an overweight morning radio sidekick?

(Editor’s Note: There’s nothing funny about sexual assault. Especially not if it involves Shay Doron and my dreams. WHAT?)

-G

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A weekend of MASN and Baltimore and Washington and “Battle of Basement”

Posted on 24 May 2009 by Nestor Aparicio

Well, if they weren’t going to get the sweep at least they lost in dramatic fashion. Jamie Walker gave up a prodigious grand slam to Adam Dunn in the 7th inning and the Nats beat the O’s 8-5 to avert a sweep in D.C.

Brad Bergesen pitched well enough. The Orioles battled and the game was pretty nip and tuck through the middle innings with lead changes, big hits and competitiveness. But it all unraveled in the 7th for the O’s bullpen after Bergesen hit the shower.

I’ve spent all three days pretty much glued to the TV watching this series. I was just as amazed by all of the empty seats as I was the full ones. It looks like they sold a lot of tickets and many didn’t come. It was just weird looking at it for 30 innings over the last 45 hours.

I’ve been wanting to write a blog all weekend but I thought I’d just do a “summary” here today about what I’m thinking as I watch all of this pretty-much lousy baseball.

I’m also a little overwhelmed with MASN’s hodgepodge display of Nats and O’s as “friendly rivals” and how chummy the “Battle of the Beltway” feels as they both meet again and are both again headed for the basement of their respective East divisions. I call it the “Battle of the Basement” and it feels like it’ll probably be that way again next year.

With Jim Palmer back in the booth today, it was a refreshing change from the Nats-dominated coverage from Friday and Saturday. And when Cakes talks, I listen. He’s one of the few (Dave Johnson would be another) who actually teaches me stuff as I watch the game. I like that.

So, before I criticize MASN, let me say that Palmer eradicates many of their deficiencies with his brilliance, information, stories and general arrogance and candor. At this point, he’s Howard Cosell compared to what I hear anywhere else on MASN, CBS Radio, 105.7, Pressbox or anyone else who is “on the payroll” with the Orioles, Angelos or the axis of the “powers that be.”

But I’m just overwhelmed with how “templated” the Orioles and Nationals “fan experience” is when they tune their favorite club in on television. Both of their TV ratings are in the dumper and heading south with my last place summer nights. So, I suppose, other than telling us when Matt Wieters comes and pitching more events and MASN house ads and promotions, what else can they do with these teams that will be well into September before they win a combined 100 games?

But I love baseball. And I’m watching. And I’ve been taking some notes this weekend on Baltimore vs. Washington and how “flat” this thing feels.

Some random observations:

* A lot of orange in the seats all weekend in D.C. The O’s fans represented in almost Boston-like color in the seats. I’m not sure if that’s the D.C. side of the fanbase that thought that having a team they knew would suck as opposed to Montreal’s problems and MLB’s ownership would be a better play five years ago?

I’m not really sure how I would feel if I lived in Rockville and loved baseball. Why would I become a Nats fans? (Granted, it’s pretty easy to jump off the orange ship with the way Angelos has behaved with D.C. in general over the past 15 years. He’s more disliked in D.C. than he is here for trying to block the team’s entrance and now summarily screwing up the TV rights and presentation of the games.)

I suppose it’s the same situation for someone in Baltimore who truly fell in love with the Redskins in 1984 and just became a fan of the “nearest” team. I’ve rooted for the Capitals most of my life and considered the Bullets my “home” team until they moved into D.C. and changed their name to the Wizards.

It sucks bad enough being an Orioles fan. Imagine adopting the Nationals and watching them BOTH and trying to hang in there watching two doses of MASN every night to get your baseball fix…

* Debbi Taylor, former NESN girl who got her start as Peter Gammons’ girl wonder about 15 years ago at ESPN, makes Amber Theoharis look like Bonnie Bernstein or Suzy Kolber. The Nats broadcast team in general sounds like vanilla, blah, so what, etc. But again, they do have a 13-30 team that they have to make sense of every day. It ain’t easy talking day after day about losing. Trust me, we at WNST.net feel the same way. How many ways can you “sell” something that’s lousy?

* Palmer is hysterically funny. I’m not sure the guys at Famous Dave’s are happy with his assessment of their food, but it is funny.

* Hall of Famer Bob Feller stopped by in the middle of the game today and was just fabulous with one liners and old stories. Jim Palmer and Bob Feller talking old-school baseball might bore the hell out of some of the 21-year olds in the audience, but I love that stuff. I wish Feller, who is now 90 years young, would’ve stayed for two more innings. My Pop told me all about Bob Feller and the old stories are what sustain my interest in baseball these days.

•    I really wish this rivalry were good. The Redskins-Ravens thing is hot. Even when both teams suck, the game will always be a four-year war and the fans draw up the battle lines. I’m good with that. I hate the Redskins. I want to hate the Nationals. But neither one of these teams gives me any reason to feel any emotion. We had a bus trip planned for today and couldn’t find anyone who wanted to go. That’s pretty sad, I think. The Nationals are – alas — just “another team.” I wonder if sometime in the next 10 years whether it will ever develop into a “Hatfield-McCoy” thing. Right now, that feels a long, long way away…

* The one thing that I have found thoroughly offensive since Friday night has been MASN’s “mixed marriage” coverage. Look, I CLEARLY KNOW AND APPRECIATE that they’re “saving a buck” by combining the coverage. But if I hear Dibble call the Nationals “us” or “we” again or watch one more dorky Nats fan talk about “defining moments” in the same exact canned ads as they play on the Orioles broadcasts as they start the day 12-30, I’m gonna puke.

Angelos really HAS screwed up both cities for baseball. At least it’s comforting to know MASN’s just as lousy as a “templated” D.C. product.

And while I’m on it, the marketing phrase “Birdland” sucks. It’s just awful.

In D.C., they’re clearly “cultivating” Natstown”

As my wife pointed out, what would be wrong with “O-Town”?

Or “O’s Town”?

Anything but “Birdland,” which sounds like a place a last-place team would play to me.

•    I’ve gotta go now. Ray Knight and Johnny Holliday are on talking about the Nats in HD. I have to tune into MASN2 now to see Rick Dempsey and Tom Davis try to make sense of a loss to the Nats.

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Proof: Pittsburgh really does suck more than Baltimore

Posted on 23 May 2009 by Nestor Aparicio

I’m doing my usual Memorial Day “chill” downtown in the world’s most beautiful city — that’s Baltimore, folks — and scanning the web and tripped across an ESPN.com piece about the Pittsburgh Pirates and their ineptitude.

I intuitively knew they they haven’t played playoff baseball in the Steel City since Barry Bonds in 1992. I honestly don’t think about the Pirates too much and it’s the lone “new” ballpark that I’ve never entered. (Although I am a big fan of Primanti Sandwiches! The only saving grace — besides leaving of course — that Pittsburgh has, in my humble opinion.)

The Pirates have had 17 consecutive seasons of losing. As long as Camden Yards has existed, they’ve stunk. Almost just like us, with the Angelos Orioles.

But there is a considerable difference. Or a whole volume of them, really. The Orioles HAD it all — a huge market, suites, fans, corporate sponsors, the best legacy in baseball and heroes — and blew it. The Pirates were on the verge of potentially “breaking through” but the market limitations and the general dirge of Three Rivers Stadium (by FAR, the worst stadium I ever saw a baseball game in because the seats were so far from the field) killed them. Bobby Bonilla wanted out. Barry Bonds wanted out. Syd Thrift was thrown out. Doug Drabek wanted money. Andy Van Slyke came to Baltimore about eight years too late. They never really sold a lot of tickets.

And really, Pittsburgh is ALL about the Steelers. Period. The Penguins might win the Stanley Cup again next month but it won’t even be on the radar compared to the Steelers winning. (For the record: Baltimore is really missing out by not having an NHL team, which is all the more reason the Caps and Baltimore should “marry” over the next decade!)

Just thought it was an interesting MLB article for the day as the Orioles and Nationals continue the “Battle for the Basement” in D.C. this holiday weekend. Yeah, they suck — but not as bad as Pittsburgh.

Not a low blow — just a fact!

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