Tag Archive | "new york rangers"

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The Kings and I, a sports lovestory

Posted on 07 June 2014 by Tony Wisniewski

Once upon a time, I met a girl who didn’t understand a lick about football.

Or baseball.

Or basketball.  Or golf.  Or fantasy football.  Or beer.  Or funny movies.

Off-the-bat, we had nothing in common other than the fact that I love hot chicks and she was–definitely still is–a chick who is hot.

Though she failed my Diner-themed Baltimore sports assessment, I married her anyway.  It was our shining moment of compromise, due to the fact that I was apparently being held to some sort of standard as well–I failed her health requirements of long walks after dinner and proposed reduction of my caloric intake.

As the story goes, she’s taught me a little about eating vegetables and hot yoga; I’ve taught her what a Mike-Backer is.  She’s helped me understand “normal people portions” of wings and ice cream; I’ve helped her understand why and when Buck Showalter tinkles the game away by over-managing.

Recently, though, we’ve run into a conundrum of sorts.  She’s curious about hockey–and due to her childhood, she even has an idea of how the game is played.  Naturally, being a sports guy and now a writer for WNST, she took it for granted that I knew something about hockey.

It’s like one of those deep dark secrets that now, in the first year of marriage, is finally coming out.  The other night, when the Kings took game one, she asked me who their best player was, and my answer propelled the fertilizer to hit the fan:

“Wayne Gretzky.”  Yes, I said Wayne Gretzky.

All the cliches of people who don’t know sports started flooding my brain.  From the goons roaming Camden Yards once per year wondering when Cal Ripken is batting next, to the dummies who still think Matt Stover is booting field goals at The Bank, I’ve never been among the cretins of general sports knowledge–until I said “Wayne Gretzky.”

Of course I know Gretzky retired years ago.  But it was the only answer I had.  I shot back to the one-season-Saturday-morning-childhood-cartoon Pro Stars, that featured Gretzky teaming up with Michael Jordan and Bo Jackson to save the world.  I remembered he wore Kings garb.  It was all I had to go on.

Naturally, in my emasculated state of mind, I ate some raw ground beef and did what any manly sports man would do: I Googled things.  Let me take you through a little play-by-play:

  • Off-the-bat, I saw that there’s a puck–okay, cool, I knew that.  This is easy stuff.
  • I learned there’s a rule called “Butt-ending.” A penalty where a player jabs another with the end of his stick.  Ok, sounds kind of weird.
  • Next I stumbled on rules like “Checked from Behind,” “Spearing,” and “Hooking.”  Um, yea, maybe I should move away from the rules.

Next I started to look up things like “how to play hockey.”  Let me walk you through that one:

  • Ah, great, an article that will tell me how to play this foreign game.
  • First point “learn to skate properly, even if you’re a goalie.”  Okay, I might have started a little too far back.
  • Next “pass the puck,” and “get in good physical condition.”  Yea, this is worthless.

At least I can say I tried to learn hockey.  As for my wife, well, she’s still way ahead of me; she curbed my misguided disdain over the self-fabricated idea that the NHL sold the naming rights of The “Stanley” Cup to the Black and Decker guys.  Who knew?

She educated me on four specific reasons why I should root for the Kings heading into game-two of the Finals:

  1. They’re playing the Rangers, who are from New York, meaning that naturally, some Yankees fans will be susceptible to disappointment and heartbreak.  Sweet.
  2. They play in LA, meaning that naturally, some Clippers fans have a chance to feel good about something.  I’m cool with that.
  3. Wayne Gretzky was a member of the team.  I enjoyed his cartoon.
  4. Wayne Gretzky’s daughter, Paulina, is a hot chick.  I love hot chicks.

It all makes sense now.  Go Kings.

 

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ESPN’s Cohn states Ovechkin only constant in Capitals playoff struggles

Posted on 28 January 2014 by WNST Audio

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Drew’s Morning Dish —  Tues., May 7

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Drew’s Morning Dish — Tues., May 7

Posted on 07 May 2013 by Drew Forrester

Ahhhh, now that’s the Caps I know and love.

With a chance to go up 3-0 in the series and put the Rangers on life support, the Capitals did what they usually do last night in Game 3 of their playoff series at the Garden.

They let New York back in the series.

That Washington lost, 4-3, isn’t really the story.

It’s the way it happened.

Skating around with cement in their boots most of the night, the Caps gave up a handful of bad goals, including the eventual game-winner in the 3rd period when Backstrom and Ovechkin were both puck-watching in front of the goal just long enough to let New York’s Derek Stepan sneak in and re-direct the puck past Braden Holtby.

Six minutes later it all ended in high-drama when Washington was handed a power play with 1:54 remaining and used an extra-attacker to effectively create a two-man advantage for the game’s final ninety seconds.

How did the Caps handle the 6-on-4 situation?

Not well.

They passed the puck around – and around – and around – and around.  They tried a couple of shots here and there just to keep themselves awake, but nothing ever looked remotely dangerous and the final horn blew with the Caps having failed to create one really good scoring chance with a two-man advantage late in the game.

If you closed your eyes and tried hard enough, you definitely could have seen Mike Ridley, Kelly Miller and Mike Gartner on the ice there at the end, flailing around, looking for one scoring opportunity late in the game. It looked like “the old Caps” in the final ninety seconds.

It’s a series now, as most of us assumed it would be, since the Washington Capitals never, ever, do anything the easy way.

I hope you have Game 7 tickets.  That should be one helluva game in D.C. next week.

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The story out of Texas where the high school track athlete was disqualified for “excessive celebration” because he pointed to the sky as a show of his faith following a race is proof-positive of what has gone wrong with this country.

These nitwits in Texas should be ashamed of themselves.

Young boys and girls need MORE faith and MORE God in their lives, not less.

Punishing that kid for his post-race demonstration is idiotic.

You would think adults would know better than to hand down an asinine decision like that…then again, those in charge who levied the penalty probably haven’t been to church in 25 years.

I swear, the things human beings do sometimes, huh?

It all makes me wonder how some people actually get by from day-to-day.

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I think I’ve had enough for now.

The Caps losing like that coupled with those clowns in Texas…it’s just about all I can handle.

The only saving grace is RUSH is in town tonight playing at the Arena, which means I’ll play some good music during today’s show as a tip of the cap to Geddy, Neil and Alex.

Stay dry.

Happy Tuesday.

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