Tag Archive | "NFL Power Rankings"

“The Reality Check” Week 8 NFL Power Rankings

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“The Reality Check” Week 8 NFL Power Rankings

Posted on 23 October 2013 by Glenn Clark

Glenn Clark’s Rankings…

32. Jacksonville Jaguars (Last Week: 32)

So…ummm…Mike Brown is a thing question mark.

31. Tampa Bay Buccaneers (31)

Mike James. Don’t act like you don’t know his name.

30. Minnesota Vikings (29)

“Josh Freeman is still our quarterback because aww f*ck it. Wait…he’s hurt? Well then we’ll start Ponder. Because, again, aww f*ck it.”

29. New York Giants (30)

It was neat to flash all the way back to the guy that was on the cover of Madden two years ago.

28. Oakland Raiders (28)

They had a bye? I had just assumed they played and no one cared as usual.

27. Houston Texans (22)

I know this is hard to believe for a team that I dropped five spots to #27, but they actually showed some things.

26. St. Louis Rams (21)

But at least Janoris Jenkins had a neat weekend!

25. Washington Redskins (27)

They beat a team playing Josh McCown. Wait, was it Luke? No, it was Josh. Or Cade McNown. I don’t know.

24. Arizona Cardinals (17)

So…maybe not so much on the Carson Palmer experiment then?

23. Philadelphia Eagles (18)

Michael Vick’s return will allow Matt Barkley to conduct their band I guess.

22. Tennessee Titans (19)

Better with Jake Locker back-perhaps not soon enough to save anything.

21. Pittsburgh Steelers (26)

But the team they beat Sunday wasn’t really all that good.

20. Atlanta Falcons (24)

HARRY DOUGLAS MANIA!

19. Cleveland Browns (16)

And if Jason Campbell doesn’t work then…I don’t know, Troy Smith?

18. Carolina Panthers (25)

They’re probably about to inexplicably lose to a terrible team again, right? Who’s next on the schedule?

17. Buffalo Bills (23)

Is their a greater disparity between NFL locales than Buffalo and back to back trips to Miami and New Orleans?

(Continued on Page 2…)

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“The Reality Check” Week 7 NFL Power Rankings

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“The Reality Check” Week 7 NFL Power Rankings

Posted on 16 October 2013 by Glenn Clark

Glenn Clark’s Rankings…

32. Jacksonville Jaguars (Last Week 32)

When you watch the documentary about the 2013 Jags, the highlight will be halftime of last week’s game.

31. Tampa Bay Buccaneers (31)

Does the MRSA outbreak even end up in the Top 5 worst things to happen to them this season?

30. New York Giants (30)

They’re on Monday Night Football because ESPN is dying for you to find out what “The Blacklist” is all about.

29. Minnesota Vikings (27)

Oh-also they really wanted you to see an episode of The Voice, too.

28. Oakland Raiders (26)

They beat the Chargers?

27. Washington Redskins (23)

But their Special Teams Unit is number 6.798,544,213.

26. Pittsburgh Steelers (29)

Please tell me this wasn’t the start of them becoming the Steelers again.

25. Carolina Panthers (28)

There’s no in between with them, is there?

24. Atlanta Falcons (24)

Please Harry Douglas. Please Harry Douglas. Please Harry Douglas. Love, former Julio Jones fantasy owner.

23. Buffalo Bills (22)

Matt Flynn will definitely throw for 400 yards at some point this season, right?

22. Houston Texans (21)

They actually can’t get worse, can they?

21. St. Louis Rams (25)

So wait, is Zac Stacy a thing?

20. New York Jets (19)

It would be SOOO Jets for them to beat New England Sunday.

19. Tennessee Titans (18)

Jake Locker’s injury will be an undernoticed major storyline to the season when it’s over.

18. Philadelphia Eagles (20)

Nick Foles definitely starts every game the rest of the way, no?

17. Arizona Cardinals (15)

The good news is that Seattle doesn’t have a Vernon Davis.

(Continued on Page 2…)

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“The Reality Check” Week 6 NFL Power Rankings

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“The Reality Check” Week 6 NFL Power Rankings

Posted on 09 October 2013 by Glenn Clark

Glenn Clark’s Rankings…

32. Jacksonville Jaguars (Last Week 32)

Would they lose 63-0 to Florida State?

31. Tampa Bay Buccaneers (31)

The Miami (Ohio) job is open if Greg Schiano’s agent wants to get cracking.

30. New York Giants (29)

But only two games out of first place.

29. Pittsburgh Steelers (28)

They’ll probably be very competitive the rest of the season…in Conference USA.

28. Carolina Panthers (21)

I feel like such a fool for buying into them.

27. Minnesota Vikings (27)

I bet with Josh Freeman as quarterback, they end up as high as #20 on this list at some point.

26. Oakland Raiders (30)

Just when you think you’ve got them figured out.

25. St. Louis Rams (26)

You can only get so much credit for beating Jacksonville.

24. Atlanta Falcons (18)

Just cancel fantasy football season already.

23. Washington Redskins (23)

President Obama also thinks they should consider changing their defense.

22. Buffalo Bills (20)

Starting a quarterback from Duke cannot possibly lead to moving further up this list.

21. Houston Texans (16)

Since it will almost certainly be asked, it CAN get worse. It’s just hard to imagine it will.

20. Philadelphia Eagles (22)

Can only play the Giants twice a season unfortunately.

19. New York Jets (25)

I know they’re 3-2, I just can’t believe they’ll be 6-4 in five weeks.

18. Tennessee Titans (11)

You wouldn’t wish Ryan Fitzpatrick upon anyone.

17. Dallas Cowboys (17)

It’s enough to make you think they’ll be okay in that division.

(Continued on Page 2…)

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“The Reality Check” Week 5 NFL Power Rankings

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“The Reality Check” Week 5 NFL Power Rankings

Posted on 02 October 2013 by Glenn Clark

Glenn Clark’s Rankings…

32. Jacksonville Jaguars (Last Week 32)

Hey! Thanks for your tackle! Any tight ends or receivers you’d like to send along too?

31. Tampa Bay Buccaneers (31)

You think Greg Schiano called Bobby Petrino for tips on how to sneak out in the middle of a season?

30. Oakland Raiders (30)

More wins than the two teams ahead of them, less good players.

29. New York Giants (22)

My buddy Gregg Rosenthal from NFL.com just keeps telling me that if you took the names of the back of the jerseys you’d think they were the Jags.

28. Pittsburgh Steelers (24)

They’ll still be winless next week.

27. Minnesota Vikings (29)

Their only win is over one of the worst teams.

26. St. Louis Rams (20)

Sam Bradford kinda makes you long for the days of…I dunno…Marc Bulger?

25. New York Jets (26)

Good news. They’ve left the door open for Matt Sims.

24. Arizona Cardinals (25)

Perhaps they could make a trade to get Brian Hoyer back?

23. Washington Redskins (23)

They beat the Raiders. That doesn’t move them up.

22. Philadelphia Eagles (19)

I’m so stupid I once had them in the Top 10.

21. Carolina Panthers (21)

1-2 doesn’t seem so bad all things considered, does it?

20. Buffalo Bills (27)

Still kinda in denial.

19. Cleveland Browns (28)

Finally NFL Network gets a good game Thursday night.

18. Atlanta Falcons (13)

They’re better than this. They are.

17. Dallas Cowboys (14)

About right.

(Continued on Page 2…)

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“The Reality Check” Week 4 NFL Power Rankings

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“The Reality Check” Week 4 NFL Power Rankings

Posted on 26 September 2013 by Glenn Clark

Glenn Clark’s Rankings…

32. Jacksonville Jaguars (Last Week 32)

More vile than the “Teen Mom” turning her private parts into a sex toy.

31. Tampa Bay Buccaneers (30)

Is it too late for Greg Schiano to throw his name in for the Texas job?

30. Oakland Raiders (28)

Matt Flynn might throw for 400 against the Redskins.

29. Minnesota Vikings (25)

I heard that next year they’re going to play a NFL game in London!

28. Cleveland Browns (31)

We live in a strange world.

27. Buffalo Bills (26)

Still likely a tough test Sunday.

26. New York Jets (29)

Not buying it.

25. Arizona Cardinals (24)

At least they have all of their finge…nevermind.

24. Pittsburgh Steelers (23)

This is really bad team.

23. Washington Redskins (22)

This is also a really bad team.

22. New York Giants (17)

This is a really bad team as well.

21. Carolina Panthers (27)

That’s a hell of a win over a really bad team.

20. St. Louis Rams (19)

But you don’t get the feeling they can’t beat San Fran.

19. Philadelphia Eagles (15)

They should be thankful there are a lot of bad teams in this league.

18. San Diego Chargers (18)

Given all of the bad around the league, I won’t drop them for a loss.

17. Detroit Lions (21)

Big test with Chicago coming to Ford Field.

(Continued on Page 2…)

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“The Reality Check” Week 3 NFL Power Rankings

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“The Reality Check” Week 3 NFL Power Rankings

Posted on 18 September 2013 by Glenn Clark

Glenn Clark’s Rankings…

32. Jacksonville Jaguars (Last Week 32)

I assume the Jacksonville CBS affiliate is going to have to start running apologies too.

31. Cleveland Browns (31)

Bigger issue: missing a wide open throw to Chris Ogbonnaya or counting on major offensive contributions from Chris Ogbonnaya?

30. Tampa Bay Buccaneers (28)

It’s certainly much more the whole “assh*le coach hates the quarterback” issue than the “lost on two last second field goals” issue.

29. New York Jets (27)

I scrambled to grab Bilal Powell in my fantasy league only to remember I had just grabbed Bilal Powell in my fantasy league.

28. Oakland Raiders (30)

Congratulations on your win*.

(*Obviously I don’t have to explain why a win over the Jags gets an asterisk.)

27. Carolina Panthers (24)

Gene Chizik is available and has prior experience with high paid athletes.

26. Buffalo Bills (29)

And we’re going to need a little more of you, CJ Spiller. (Signed, guys who have you in three different leagues.)

25. Minnesota Vikings (22)

Wins aren’t going to start getting easy any time soon.

24. Arizona Cardinals (26)

Should I bench Cam Newton for Carson Palmer in New Orleans?

23. Pittsburgh Steelers (20)

22. Washington Redskins (18)

Can Kirk Cousins play defense?

21. Detroit Lions (21)

The bad teams are so bad that a loss to the Cardinals doesn’t drop them.

20. Tennessee Titans (23)

Or for the Titans to lose but move up three spots anyway.

19. St. Louis Rams (19)

Or for the Rams to lose and stay put you get the picture.

18. San Diego Chargers (25)

For reals?

17. New York Giants (15)

Either Eli Manning or Cam Newton will get a win. Or they’ll both get ties. I could use a new tie.

(Continued on Page 2…)

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“The Reality Check” Week 2 NFL Power Rankings

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“The Reality Check” Week 2 NFL Power Rankings

Posted on 11 September 2013 by Glenn Clark

Glenn Clark’s Rankings…

32. Jacksonville Jaguars (Last Week: 29)

I’m sorry I ever doubted the Jags being the worst team in the NFL.

31. Cleveland Browns (28)

So…you know…no pressure, Ravens.

30. Oakland Raiders (32)

Did you know their Tight Ends are something named “David Ausberry & Jeron Mastrud”? They look like they should play for Baltimore.

29. Buffalo Bills (30)

I still want Tuel Time.

28. Tampa Bay Buccaneers (22)

You deserve to drop to 28 if you lose to the Jets.

27. New York Jets (31)

I don’t think they should get comfortable.

26. Arizona Cardinals (25)

It’s a road loss with some good. Not a disaster.

25. San Diego Chargers (24)

The Texans are a very good team, but there’s no excuse to lose that at home.

24. Carolina Panthers (23)

The Seahawks are a very good team, but there’s no excuse to lose that at home.

23. Tennessee Titans (27)

They get more credit for their win because it was on the road at a good team what we thought was a good team.

22. Minnesota Vikings (18)

Christian Ponder can’t possibly last the season.

21. Detroit Lions (26)

A good team can’t follow up a division win with a loss to the Cardinals-even if it’s on the road.

20. Pittsburgh Steelers (12)

What the hell was that? I mean, besides an awful lot of fun.

19. St. Louis Rams (20)

A game they should have won and did. That’s not a bad thing.

18. Washington Redskins (14)

Also from the list of “things I particularly enjoyed”.

17. Miami Dolphins (19)

Dannell Ellerbe looked really good Sunday. I know it’s one game.

(Continued on Page 2…)

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“The Reality Check” Week 1 NFL Power Rankings

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“The Reality Check” Week 1 NFL Power Rankings

Posted on 03 September 2013 by Glenn Clark

Glenn Clark’s Rankings…

32. Oakland Raiders

But their quarterback MIGHT be fun to watch.

31. New York Jets

But they might be hilariously funny to watch.

30. Buffalo Bills

EJ Manuel is back at practice, potentially robbing us of Tuel Time. Unacceptable.

29. Jacksonville Jaguars

If you have Jags on your fantasy football team, you probably drafted wrong.

28. Cleveland Browns

Paul Kruger vs. Dannell Ellerbe Week 1. So there’s that.

27. Tennessee Titans

Remember when the internet traded Kenny Britt to the Baltimore Ravens?

26. Detroit Lions

Reggie Bush could be one of the more significant X-factors in the league this season.

25. Arizona Cardinals

I’m probably giving Carson Palmer too much credit at this point in his career.

24. San Diego Chargers

You guys remember when they were an AFC power?

23. Carolina Panthers

They have to break out at SOME point with Cam Newton as QB, don’t they?

22. Tampa Bay Buccaneers

I honestly don’t know why I would think they were good.

21. Philadelphia Eagles

There’s really a chance this all works out.

20. St. Louis Rams

Probably better than anyone realizes. Including me

19. Miami Dolphins

Why do I feel so strongly about them?

18. Minnesota Vikings

Sometimes there’s a man.

17. Chicago Bears

Could you imagine a healthy Jay Cutler and Brandon Marshall for an entire season?

(Continued on Page 2…)

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“The Reality Check” Final Regular Season Power Rankings

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“The Reality Check” Final Regular Season Power Rankings

Posted on 02 January 2013 by Glenn Clark

Glenn Clark’s Rankings…

32. Kansas City Chiefs (32)

Okay, so no Josh McDaniels. Umm…Marty-ball?

31. Jacksonville Jaguars (30)

Mike Mularkey: “Are you sure you didn’t want to fire me?”

30. Arizona Cardinals (31)

I cannot believe they’re really considering hiring Todd Haley. OH.MY.GOD.

29. Oakland Raiders (29)

Now they get ready for their Super Bowl…the 40 yard dash at the NFL Combine.

28. Detroit Lions (28)

The problem for Jim Schwartz is that he’s a former defensive coach for a team that can’t play defense.

27. Philadelphia Eagles (27)

Yahoo! Sports’ Jason Cole tells us the Eagles could keep Michael Vick around if they hire Chip Kelly.

26. Cleveland Browns (26)

While the Browns’ first choice is the same Chip Kelly, no one’s first choice EVER has been the Cleveland Browns.

25. New York Jets (23)

QUARTERBACKS FOR SALE!!!!!!!!!!

24. Tennessee Titans (25)

Check back in with me in five minutes to confirm Mike Munchak still hasn’t been fired yet.

23. Buffalo Bills (24)

I think a Ken Whisenhunt/Russ Grimm combo would be a good fit there.

22. Tampa Bay Buccaneers (22)

Do you focus more on what went wrong? Or do you focus more on how to build off of seven wins?

21. Miami Dolphins (17)

At least they have a quarterback.

20. St. Louis Rams (18)

Are they as close as their record would make you believe?

19. San Diego Chargers (21)

If Peyton Manning isn’t in the AFC West, they win the thing and save Norv Turner again.

18. New Orleans Saints (16)

I’ll go ahead and assume they win 13 games next season.

17. Carolina Panthers (19)

By keeping Ron Rivera, they’d give up potential “most desirable location” status for coaches.

16. Pittsburgh Steelers (20)

If they had a healthy Ben Roethisberger for 16 games they would have won the division. Unless the Ravens had a healthy Suggs/Ngata/Webb/Lewis. I guess what I’m saying is that it doesn’t matter.

15. Dallas Cowboys (13)

What the eff do you do here?

14. Chicago Bears (14)

I’d want this job.

13. New York Giants (15)

“Hynocerous” is one of the Top 5 nicknames in football this year.

(Continued on Page 2…)

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The Reality Check Week 17 NFL Power Rankings

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The Reality Check Week 17 NFL Power Rankings

Posted on 27 December 2012 by Glenn Clark

Glenn Clark’s Rankings…

32. Kansas City Chiefs (32)

Who’s a fit here? Josh McDaniels?

31. Arizona Cardinals (31)

At this point I have to assume Whisenhunt is gone. Players openly bitching there.

30. Jacksonville Jaguars (29)

I can’t wait until they go 7-9 next year and somehow make the playoffs with Tim Tebow as quarterback.

29. Oakland Raiders (30)

I ASSUME Dennis Allen is safe, but you absolutely never know.

28. Detroit Lions (27)

But that was at least fun to watch Saturday night.

27. Philadelphia Eagles (28)

Nice of them to give Michael Vick a farewell show.

26. Cleveland Browns (26)

I honestly wouldn’t want the job of having to solve this puzzle.

25. Tennessee Titans (25)

Jake Locker gets another year before he’s fully labeled a bust.

24. Buffalo Bills (24)

I really have nothing to say about the Buffalo Bills.

23. New York Jets (20)

HIGH-LAIR-EE-USS.

22. Tampa Bay Buccaneers (21)

I wish I had paid enough attention to the Bucs to know whose fault their collapse was.

21. San Diego Chargers (23)

“You think Jon Gruden would go there?” is the question you’ll hear most related to the Bolts in the coming weeks.

20. Pittsburgh Steelers (16)

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

19. Carolina Panthers (19)

Is the late push enough for Ron Rivera to keep his job?

18. St. Louis Rams (22)

They can finish ABOVE .500…

17. Miami Dolphins (18)

Please beat New England.

(Continued on Page 2…)

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