The good news is that no matter what happens before 4pm Tuesday, I won’t have to wear a Hooters outfit anywhere.

That’s good news for all of us.

If the Baltimore Orioles had made a trade “of significance” before our WNST Baltimore Sports Media Superstar finals last week at Hooters, I had pledged to don the whole garb. I was going to show up to the event in the white tank top (with padding), orange booty shorts and tights. (I had a listener ask if I had also agreed to wax, and I said I had. Looking back, I have no idea why I said that.)

Thankfully, the acquisition of INF Omar Quintanilla (even after getting three quarters of the way to hitting for the cycle Sunday) could not be argued as “significant” by much of anyone.

Don’t get the wrong idea. This wasn’t some sort of fetish. I had ZERO interest in donning tights…unless I was given an offer to replace Christian Bale in the next Batman installment. But truth be told I would have happily squeezed into the shorts if it meant Josh Johnson had been pitching against the Oakland Athletics this weekend instead of the San Diego Padres.

Following Sunday’s win over the A’s, the Birds have gone 8-9 since the All-Star Break. They’ve lost 22 of the last 36 games they’ve played overall, but they’re still 53-49 overall and just two games back in the AL Wild Card race.

Quick, back to the negative. The O’s have a -58 run differential for the season and despite being tied for second place in the AL East, ESPN calculates that they have a 6.2% chance of making the postseason. Despite the statistic being meaningless, I figured I’d pass along that the two teams behind the Orioles in the division (the Toronto Blue Jays and Boston Red Sox) are given an 18% and 21.9% “POFF” respectively by the Worldwide Leader.

Here we are.

I’ve maintained that there’s little way to explain the success of the 2012 Baltimore Orioles as anything other than “an accident”. It hasn’t happened because GM Dan Duquette put together an overwhelming level of talent on the field before the season. It hasn’t happened because the pitching staff matured to a point where the “cavalry” evoked visions of Palmer, Cuellar, McNally and Dobson in Charm City. It hasn’t happened because the lineup has figured out a way to get the one big hit necessary when given the opportunity. It definitely hasn’t happened because the team has stolen runs with good base running and taken away runs with stellar defense.

The only tangible ways to explain the success of the Baltimore Orioles to this point are a stellar bullpen, sound leadership from Buck Showalter and a surprising amount of power lead by CF Adam Jones.

Despite the fact that pitchers like Zack Greinke, Cole Hamels, Anibal Sanchez, Francisco Liriano and Wandy Rodriguez and capable position players like Ichiro, Hanley Ramirez and Chris Johnson aren’t available anymore, there are plenty of capable players that are.

I do not believe anyone is making smoke and mirrors available however.

(I’ve thought that it would be REALLY funny however if the Birds were to acquire recently demoted Seattle Mariners 1B Justin Smoak and Milwaukee Brewers 3B Aramis Ramirez. Get it? “Smoak and Ramirez?” I’m hilarious.)

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With the deadline fastly approaching, the Orioles need to make another couple moves to ensure they continue in the playoff race throughout September. Still clinging to the final Wild Card spot, Baltimore should definitely be buyers this week, especially with a chance to make the playoffs since the Mid-90’s. Duquette already proved he was ready to be active in his deals for Jim Thome and Omar Quintanilla while continuing that philosophy for a young up and coming team.

The farm system isn’t very deep behind Dylan Bundy and Manny Machado; as the should remain untouchable for the betterment of this franchise’s future. But the Orioles do have one major assest all contending teams will be looking for an upgrade; their bullpen is possibly the best in MLB with plenty of depth. They cannot afford to depleit the entire back end of the pitching staff, but have the tools to move a couple guys without depleting the bullpen’s effectiveness.

Everyone that has made their way to Camden Yards this season knows the teams defencies. An upgrade to the back end of their rotation, the corner infield positions and outfield depth all would be welcome additions. Though they will not mortage the future, there are several options they should show interest in at the deadline that are cost effective.

Joe Blanton (SP Philadelphia Phillies): He is an innings eater an a solid fourth option in a rotation. He has plenty of playoff experience and could be a valuable asset to a team in a unique position for the first time in a decade and a half. The Phillies are in desperate need of bullpen help, while willing to unload Blanton because his contract is up after the season.

Ervin Santana (SP Los Angeles Angels): The Angels are another team looking to upgrade the bullpen and while obtaining Santana will cost more than Blanton, he is definitely a more talented player. Los Angeles has a lot of starting pitching depth and may be willing to move Santana to solidfy the 7th, 8th and/or 9th innings.

Allen Craig (UT St. Louis Cardinals): Craig is a guy without a position in St. Louis, making him expendable for another team in need of pitching help. Though he is not an elite defensive player, he can fill in at first or third for the O’s, while adding much needed pop to the lineup.

Placido Polanco (3B Philadelphia Phillies): Another one of the Phillies that may be involved in the fire sale this week. Polanco is no longer the player he once was, but is still great defensively and an upgrade over Baltimore’s current starters. In his last year of his contract, the risk is low while he can add experience to a young lineup.

David DeJesus (OF Chicago Cubs): He has versatility to play all of the outfield positions, as well as add the ability in several different spots in the lineup. DeJesus will cost a couple minor leaguers but none of top end value. He adds speed to the line-up, while solidifying the open door in left field.

Gaby Sanchez (1B Miami Marlins): The Marlins have already begun trading off parts and Sanchez may be the next to go. They have no room for him on the big league roster, with Carlos Lee and Logan Morrison, already in place in first base, making him relatively cheap to acquire. Even though he is having a down year, last year’s 19 HR performance and team friendly contract, are enough to take a flier on.

The improbable success of the Orioles in the first half of 2012 has the team in a precarious position as they prepare for the back end of the schedule. After 14 years of futility, the playoffs are a possibility and the city is feeling cautious optimism, which is still a far cry from euphoria, but a refreshing change from the gloom and doom that’s defined the club for as long as most can remember. Therein lies the rub.

The O’s success is encouraging enough to lead fans to contemplate the team taking the next step toward contention and adding some talent for the stretch run. The AL East is as up for grabs as it’s been in years, and safe money says that won’t last long. And the O’s while successful so far, haven’t exactly done much to suggest they’ll sustain this success for the long term, or even for the remainder of the season. There are encouraging talents in the minor leagues who could be big parts of a suddenly brighter future, or prospects who could be parlayed into major league talent now, while the iron is hot, in an effort to at least put a bookend on the Orioles’ 14-year playoff drought. The fans are divided (no surprise there), and the O’s won’t be able to please them all.

While the addition of talent is encouraging, and certainly good fodder for talk radio, the likelihood that the O’s will stand pat is real. So let’s instead look at some ways that they could be better without adding any players, but by simply putting the talent at hand to better use.

The Joe Maddon style of management is in full effect this season in the AL East as a number of teams, either by design or necessity, have taken to shaking up their lineups in an effort to capitalize on hot streaks, stimulate slumping bats, and force their players to compete with each other in a true meritocracy. Here are a few suggestions on how the O’s could improve theirs.

First they need to do some self-scouting. The Orioles are not a team that manufactures runs. They don’t bunt, they don’t steal bases, and their offense is driven by homeruns. They don’t have a true leadoff hitter, and based on the aforementioned, they don’t really need one. The Orioles most productive hitter overall also happens to be their most likely to swap a base. The Orioles should be batting Adam Jones leadoff. If Jones is the O’s best bat, the Orioles need to get him to the plate as often as possible, Batting him in the leadoff spot insures it. It also allows the O’s to put their less productive singles hitters at the bottom of the order and hope to have Jones knocking them in, in innings after the first.

I put up some numbers the other day, ranking the Orioles production per 100 plate appearances. Some of the numbers were rather interesting, including the fact that Mark Reynolds makes less outs than every Oriole except Jim Thome, and that Adam Jones gets approximately .5 bases per trip to the plate (tops on the team by a lot).

Reynolds has been disappointing in the power department this season, but his career numbers suggest that a correction is in order. Having Adam Jones on base in front of him, and a productive bat behind him might get Reynolds more fastballs to hit too. Maybe Reynolds in the 2-hole isn’t as silly as it sounds, at least against lefties.

Below are my suggestions for the Orioles best lineups vs. left and right-handers, using only the talent available on the Major League roster, based on their production per 100 plate appearances (listed here) and their triple slash splits vs. those pitchers (listed below).

Orioles vs. Lefties

CF – Adam Jones (294/322/471)

1B – Mark Reynolds (240/377/380)

C – Matt Wieters (384/444/575)

DH – Chris Davis (316/328/526)

SS – JJ Hardy (298/337/452)

RF – Nick Markakis (231/322/385)

LF – Steve Pearce (310/344/690)

3B – Steve Tolleson (250/325/472)

2B – Robert Andino (227/275/347)

Orioles vs. Righties

CF – Adam Jones (287/332/555)

RF – Nick Markakis (265/337/476)

1B – Chris Davis (258/311/459)

3B – Wilson Betemit (288/344/497)

DH – Jim Thome (258/361/587) or Mark Reynolds (196/320/385)

C – Matt Wieters (200/287/381)

SS – JJ Hardy (201/239/357)

2B – Robert Andino (233/300/307)

LF – Xavier Avery (257/313/392)

Not sure how many of you out there reading this article would consider yourselves DMX fans, but when I think of the Orioles right now, losers of 5 of their last 6 games, I can’t help but keep thinking about the song “Slippin” he had out back in the 90s. The chorus starts off with the line “I’m slippin, I’m fallin, I can’t get up.” As far as Baltimore in the AL East Standings, this song sure sounds fitting. A month ago, the Orioles were first place, riding a wave of optimism. Jason Hammel was 6-2 with a 3.06 ERA. Rewind a month and a half ago, and Nick Markakis still had both of his arms in tact.  Don’t get me wrong; the O’s have plenty to feel good about heading into the All Star Break. Pending they do not lose all seven games out on the West Coast, the O’s will finish with a record above .500 for the first half of the season. That’s not too bad in arguably the toughest division in baseball year in and year out.

 However, it’s not good enough. This team has given the fans in this city a taste of success, and the last thing people want to see is management taking their foot off the gas because they do not believe that they should trade prospects to win now. And to win now, make a move now. Do not wait until the trade deadline on July 29^th to make a move, by then this team could easily fall back to mediocrity and pave the way for Ravens preseason talk to dominate the airwaves before August begins. There should be no All-Star “Break” for Dan Duquette, he needs to keep this team in contention before it is too late.

Now, I am not suggesting the Orioles get crazy and give up the house for Zach Greinke, the unheralded best starting pitcher at the deadline. The Brewers will want the house for a guy who will hit the Free Agent market after the season and command top dollars. Leave that to your neighbors to the north in the Bronx to make that move. The other name mentioned as a possible back of the rotation starter is Francisco Liriano of Minnesota. Let me give you real world business guys a scenario before you consider him a good move. A kid comes out of college at 23, cannot find a job in this tough economy so he decides to sell cars. He comes in fired up out of the gate and crushes his numbers, he clearly has talent. Six years later, you can still see the talent; he cannot seem to push those cars out the door like he once did. That is what I think of with Liriano. He burst onto the scene in 2006, going 12-3 with a 2.16 ERA and 144 strikeouts. Now, the strikeouts are still there (70 strikeouts through 12 starts), but his ERA is over 5 and his record is 2-7. Plus, he reminds me too much of Daniel Cabrera. Remember that name, O’s fans? Sorry I am sure you would like to forget some of his atrocious outings.

Bruce Levine of ESPN Chicago reported a couple of weeks back that the Cubs are looking to move Ryan Dempster, Matt Garza and Alfonso Soriano. Dempster is their most attractive piece, even at 35 years old. He is spotting a 2.11 ERA through 12 games started this season. The Cubs are so desperately trying to ship out Soriano, rumor has it that they would be willing to pay 90% of his salary to the team who takes him.

If I am Dan Duquette, I am calling Theo Epstein and I am trying to bring the veteran Dempster along with Soriano to Baltimore. To me, the trade makes sense on so many levels for the O’s. First and foremost, the O’s lack a veteran, durable presence in their rotation. Forget about the fact that Dempster is currently on the 15-day DL with Right Lat tightness, he will be back right after the Break. Since he underwent Tommy John Surgery in 2003, Dempster has been a rock in both the Cubs bullpen and starting rotation. Thus far in 2012, Dempster has spotted a 2.11 ERA in 12 starts, compared to Matt Garza who is more expensive and has a 4.01 ERA. Plus, Dempster at 35 would be the oldest pitcher on the O’s rotation, and that is by no means a bad thing. Who better for the 26 year old of the rotation, Wei-Yin Chen and Jake Arietta to learn from than the described laid back Dempster? I mean come on, the guy told the Arizona media in 2007 if that if his career were to tumble, he planned on taking up ninja training. How cool is that?

As far as Soriano is concerned, even if you are a casual baseball fan, you probably know his career has been in a steady decline since the Yanks shipped him out for A-Rod back in 2004. But if the Cubs really would pay 90% of his salary, would it kill you to have him as your 4^th Outfielder? He is a seven time All Star and two-time World Series Champ, it cannot hurt having a guy who has been in a winning atmosphere in your clubhouse.

For the sake of this article, I won’t dive in too deep to the O’s prospects they would look to ship out to acquire this package deal. I will leave it up to the Front Office to make those decisions. One thing would be evident: the O’s would not have to risk trading potential significant prospects for the future to acquire 35 and 36 year old veterans. However, they need to make some sort of moves if they want to continue this phrase I have heard thrown out this year called “Orioles Magic.”

I believe the next verse of the chorus of the song “Slippin” by DMX goes something like this: “Ay yo I’m slippin’ I’m fallin’ I gots to get up, Get me back on my feet so I can tear sh*t up!” If Dan Duquette does in fact share the same enjoyment from rap music as I do, he should listen to this song and get the O’s back on their feet by calling Epstein not at the trade deadline, but right now.

On Saturday the Orioles added veteran slugger Jim Thome to an already potent lineup. The Orioles bats have been asleep here of late. They have been unable to come up with big hits in clutch situations. To say the Orioles bats have been struggling here lately would be putting it mildly. There best hitter during this stretch has been journeyman utility player Wilson Betemit. Betemit’s bat has been decent this year but he is liked a statue playing the infield and he is just down right terrible in the outfield. The Orioles need more than a 40 year old DH to help this team stay in contention. The pitching has been horrible here of late. There best pitcher in Hammel couldn’t even make it out of the fourth inning in his last start.

Although I like the addition of Thome to this lineup, he can not play the field and first and third base are a pressing needs for this team. For the Orioles the stay in contention and be able to compete with such teams as the Yankees, Rangers, Angels, just to name a few, it needs to start with better pitching and timely hitting. Thome will help this lineup but unless the rest of the lineup steps up and produces and the pitching improves, we are going to be talking strictly football in August wonder what went wrong after such a promising beginning. Duquette needs to work out a deal to bring another starting pitcher to Baltimore. We have dealt with enough retreads over the last 15 years, its time to turn the Orioles back into that proud organization they were just 15 years ago. He needs to make a big splash before the trade deadline. Figure out how to get Garza or Hamels to Baltimore to help this rotation and help the Orioles become legitimate once again. Hopefully Thome is just the beginning of what is to come over the next month before the trade deadline on July 31st. Duquette has been a pleasant surprise since coming to Baltimore, lets keep it up and get the Orioles back in the playoffs.