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Top 10 Baseball Distractions

Posted on 08 November 2011 by Glenn Clark

Honorable Mention: Pro Wrestling: TNA Turning Point (Sunday 8pm from Orlando live on Pay-Per-View); Golf: Australian Open (Wednesday-Saturday 8pm from Sydney live on Golf Channel), LPGA Tour Lorena Ochoa Invitational (Thursday-Sunday 4pm from Guadalajara, Mexico live on Golf Channel); Auto Racing: NASCAR Kobalt Tools 500(Sunday 3pm from Phoenix live on ESPN); Women’s College Basketball: Loyola @ Maryland (Friday 7pm Comcast Center), Georgetown @ Maryland (Sunday 2pm Comcast Center); Tennis: ATP Tour BNP Paribas Masters (Tuesday 5am Wednesday & Thursday 4:30am  Friday 8am & 1:30pm Saturday 8am Sunday 9am from Paris live on Tennis Channel)

10. Foo Fighters/Social Distortion (Friday 7pm Verizon Center); Daughtry (Saturday 7:30pm Patriot Center); Everlast (Wednesday 7pm Recher Theatre); Howie Day (Saturday 7pm Baltimore Soundstage); Chuck Brown (8pm & 11pm Rams Head on Stage); Trombone Shorty & Orleans Avenue (Wednesday & Thursday 7pm 9:30 Club), Fitz and the Tantrums (Sunday 7pm 9:30 Club), Manchester Orchestra (Monday 6pm 9:30 Club); Rockapella (Thursday 8pm Strathmore); Jason Bonham’s Led Zeppelin Experience (Thursday 8pm Fillmore Silver Spring); Sting (Thursday 8pm D.A.R. Constitution Hall), Kansas (Friday 8pm D.A.R. Constitution Hall), 3 Doors Down (Sunday 7pm D.A.R. Constitution Hall); Joe Bonamassa (Friday 8pm Hippodrome)

My buddy Chad Lamasa and I are headed to see the Fighters of Foo Friday night. He got the tickets, so I have to bring the Mentos. They kick a little ass…

I REALLY shouldn’t enjoy Chris Daughtry, but I totally do. I wish he was bringing Timbaland to Fairfax with him…

Fitz and the Tantrums are one of my absolute favorite bands of 2011. Before you watch a video of them playing with Daryl Hall, let’s debate whether it would be more fun to spell favorite “favourite”. I say yes.

If you’re not stoked for Rockapella, you and I disagree on the topic. I respect your feelings however.

9. Pauly Shore (Thursday-Saturday Magooby’s Joke House); Michael Ian Black (Saturday 9pm Ottobar); Maryland Irish Festival (Friday-Sunday Timonium Fairgrounds); “J. Edgar” out in theaters (Friday)

I believe Pauly Shore was voted “Most likely Hollywood star to be playing at a joint called Magooby’s Joke House in the future” 15 years ago. I’d call his fall from stardom surprising if it was. It isn’t.

Meanwhile Leonardo DiCaprio was voted “Most likely Hollywood star to be releasing another awesome movie this week” about 10 minutes ago. He’s so freaking good. The J. Edgar Hoover movie looks incredible, but it would take a lot of work for someone to make a movie half as good as “Catch Me If You Can”…

I’m going to do my best to come by the Irish Festival Saturday. Mostly because I want to eat a meal that resembles this…

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Top 10 Baseball Distractions

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Top 10 Baseball Distractions

Posted on 01 November 2011 by Glenn Clark

Honorable Mention: Boxing-Lucian Bute vs. Glen Johnson (Saturday 9pm from Quebec City, Canada live on Showtime); Golf: World Golf Championships-HSBC Champions (Thursday & Friday 12am, Friday & Saturday 11pm from Shanghai, China live on Golf Channel), Champions Tour Charles Schwab Cup Championship (Thursday-Sunday 4:30pm from San Francisco live on Golf Channel);  Soccer: MLS Playoffs Eastern Conference Semifinals-Colorado Rapids @ Sporting Kansas City (Wednesday 8pm from Kansas City live on Fox Soccer Channel), Philadelphia Union @ Houston Dynamo (Thursday 8:30pm from Houston live on ESPN2/ESPN3.com); Western Conference Semifinals-Real Salt Lake @ Seattle Sounders (Wednesday 10pm from Seattle live on ESPN2/ESPN3.com), New York Red Bulls @ LA Galaxy (Thursday 11pm from Carson, CA live on ESPN2/ESPN3.com); College Soccer: Wake Forest @ Maryland (Thursday 7:30pm Ludwig Field); America East Tournament Quarterfinal: Hartford @ UMBC (Saturday 7pm Retriever Soccer Park); Tennis: ATP Tour Swiss Indoors Basel (Tuesday 10:30am Wednesday & Thursday 11am Friday 9am Saturday 9:30am Sunday 9am from Basel, Switzerland live on Tennis Channel); New York City Marathon (Sunday 9am from New York live on Universal Sports); Canadian Football League: Winnipeg Blue Bombers @ Calgary Stampeders (Saturday 4pm from Calgary live on NFL Network); Exhibition Women’s College Basketball: Messiah @ Maryland (Tuesday 7pm Comcast Center), Holy Family @ Maryland (Sunday 7pm Comcast Center)

10. Jay-Z/Kanye West (Tuesday 7:30pm 1st Mariner Arena, Thursday 7:30pm Verizon Center); Buddy Guy (Saturday 7pm Rams Head Live), Marsha Ambrosius (Sunday 7pm Rams Head Live); Misfits (Thursday 6:30pm Recher Theatre); Orgone (Friday 8pm 8×10 Club); BoDeans (Tuesday 8pm Rams Head on Stage), Shelby Lynne (Monday 8pm Rams Head on Stage); Willie Nelson (Thursday 7pm 9:30 Club), Stephen Kellogg & The Sixers (Saturday 6:30pm 9:30 Club), Cold War Kids (Monday 7pm 9:30 Club); Donald Glover/Childish Gambino (Tuesday 7pm Fillmore Silver Spring), Jamey Johnson (Saturday 8pm Fillmore Silver Spring); Soulive (Friday 7pm State Theatre); Florence + The Machine “Ceremonials” & Wale “Ambition” available in stores/on iTunes (Tuesday)

There’s nothing I can say about HOV and Ye that you don’t already know. I assume they’ll be going HAM on the Civic Center Tuesday night…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RdQ0kueR2DU[/youtube]

Marsha Ambrosius comes off to me as sort of a female version of Maxwell. Am I right?

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6lgbUptkC28&ob=av2e[/youtube]

I feel like “Sabotage” is the track I’m digging most early from Wale’s new record. Someone ask him to play “Everybody Beats Glenn” against me this week on “The Reality Check” on AM1570 WNST.net…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Oz8FltiaPJk[/youtube]

Who was the guy that spent the cash for the new FATM record the MINUTE hit iTunes? That was Glenn Clark. Seriously, this band has TOTALLY avoided the sophomore slump issue.

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WbN0nX61rIs&ob=av2e[/youtube]

9. Jeff Dunham (Saturday 8pm Patriot Center); Louis C.K.(Friday 7:30pm & 9:30pm Meyerhoff Symphony Hall); Carlos Mencia (Tuesday 7pm DC Improv), Jim Breuer (Friday-Sunday DC Improv); “A Very Harold & Kumar 3D Christmas” out in theaters (Friday)

If you’re a Saturday Night Live mark the way I am, you might be willing to check out Jim Breuer…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qUjmGSMGUt4[/youtube]

I don’t know that I’m signing off on the new Harold & Kumar flick, but the first one is STILL funny…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tSWnmOvgyKc[/youtube]

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Top 10 Baseball Distractions

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Top 10 Baseball Distractions

Posted on 04 April 2011 by Glenn Clark

Honorable Mention: Horse Racing: Illinois Derby (Saturday 5pm from Stickney/Cicero, IL live on TVG), Santa Anita Derby (Saturday 5pm from Arcadia, CA live on HRTV); Soccer: U.S. Open Cup-Philadelphia Union @ DC United (Wednesday 7:30pm RFK Stadium), MLS-Los Angeles Galaxy @ DC United (Saturday 7:30pm RFK Stadium); Boxing: Erik Morales vs. Marcos Maidana (Saturday 9pm from Las Vegas live on HBO PPV), Friday Night Fights-David Lemieux vs. Marco Antonio Rubio (Friday 9pm from Montreal live on ESPN2); Tennis: ATP Tour U.S. Men’s Clay Court Championship (Saturday 2pm Sunday 3pm from Houston live on Tennis Channel); Arena Football: AFL Dallas Vigilantes vs. Georgia Force (Friday 8pm from Duluth, GA live on NFL Network)

10. Marsha Ambrosius & Melanie Fiona (Thursday 7pm Rams Head Live); Bill Burr (Friday 7 & 9:30pm Recher Theatre), Aimee Mann (Sunday 7pm Recher Theatre); Colin Hay (Sunday 8pm Rams Head on Stage); House of Pain (Tuesday 7pm 9:30 Club), Toad The Wet Sprocket (Saturday 7pm 9:30 Club), Old 97′s (Sunday 7pm 9:30 Club); Dirty Heads (Monday 7pm 9:30 Club); Widespread Panic (Tuesday & Wednesday 8pm Warner Theatre); Ralphie May (Saturday 8pm Lisner Auditorium); Buddy Guy (Sunday 7:30pm Birchmere); Frankie Valli & The Four Seasons (Saturday 8:30pm Hippodrome)

House of Pain is still awesome, even if only one song REALLY matters…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=U9Q0jPyrja0[/youtube]

If you don’t love this Toad The Wet Sprocket song, we’ll NEVER be friends…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YZpUUrEWnWQ[/youtube]

I got the chance to hang out with Rhett Miller from the Old 97′s on Radio Row in Dallas at the Super Bowl this year, and I COMPLETELY nerded out.

rhettmiller

If you’re not familiar, please to be checking them out…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DDDyD0Hj5n0[/youtube]

I listened to a lot of WQSR growing up thanks to my father. I’m grateful. It taught me the significance of artists like Frankie Valli…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bE40KM4SGAY[/youtube]

9. Cirque du Soleil “Totem” opens (Thursday 8pm Grand Chapiteau at the Westport Waterfront); Ringling Bros. and Barnum & Bailey Circus present Barnum 200 (Thursday 10:30am & 7:30pm, Friday 7:30pm, Saturday 11:30am 3:30pm & 7:30pm, Sunday 1pm & 5pm 1st Mariner Arena)

I used to be a big fan of the circus, but…you know…I’m not 8 anymore. Everyone keeps telling me about how great Cirque is, but I feel like I couldn’t enjoy it without the Paul Rudd treatment from “Knocked Up”.

Instead, the only circus-related activity I enjoy watching involves YouTube and a certain former WWF star…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eC4qriqlfDM[/youtube]

It’s almost unbelievable to remember Doink The Clown having faced Triple H…like…ever.

8. Pro Wrestling: Maryland Championship Wrestling “Bodyslam Autism” (Friday 7:30pm The New Green Room Dundalk)

Neat! Another chance for me to nerd out about rasslin’!

So…who watched WrestleMania? Who thought it was a bit over the top how much they had The Undertaker sell his injuries after forcing HHH to tap?

Who has an opinion on the subject and has ALSO recently had sex with a girl?

Nope…didn’t think so.

Eh, who cares. Let’s keep nerding out.

Was the Snooki thing cool? I hated (but understood) everything about why WWE did it-and I know they thought this move should put her over…but honestly, was this cool???

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ed0LaWLy5N8[/youtube]

7. Auto Racing: NASCAR Samsung Mobile 500 (Saturday 7:30pm from Fort Worth, TX live on FOX); IndyCar Series Honda Indy Grand Prix of Alabama (Sunday 3pm from Birmingham, AL live on VERSUS)

I used to date a gal who was from the DFW area. Apparently the NASCAR race is a big deal down there.

You know what’s a BIGGER deal down there?

texas

Yep.

6. NBA: Detroit Pistons @ Washington Wizards (Tuesday 7pm from Verizon Center live on Comcast SportsNet), Washington Wizards @ Indiana Pacers (Wednesday 7pm from Indianapolis live on Comcast SportsNet), Washington Wizards @ Boston Celtics (Friday 7:30pm from Boston live on Comcast SportsNet), Atlanta Hawks @ Washington Wizards (Saturday 7pm from Verizon Center live on Comcast SportsNet), Boston Celtics @ Washington Wizards (Monday 7pm from Verizon Center live on Comcast SportsNet)

Just in time for the season to be over, the ‘Zards have actually won a couple of games recently! Neat trick!

Elsewhere in the country, there are actual significant pro basketball games being played. Like in Chicago, where Derrick Rose…is…amazing…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2QmcFh-hOg8[/youtube]

5. Women’s College Basketball: NCAA Championship Game-Notre Dame vs. Texas A&M (Tuesday 8:30pm from Indianapolis live on ESPN)

And if the Aggies end up winning, we’ll turn to Shirley Q Liquor to celebrate…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sbDX22SGZV0[/youtube]

(Yes, that is usually playing on “Elliott in the Morning” around the same time I’m arriving at 1550 Hart Rd. each morning. And it’s still funny every time.)

4. Mixed Martial Arts: Strikeforce-Nick Diaz vs. Paul Daley (Saturday 10pm from San Diego live on Showtime); Bellator Fighting Championships 40 (Saturday 9pm from Newkirk, OK live on MTV2)

I poked my head at Bellator fighting on MTV2 the other night. It wasn’t that bad. I mean, it isn’t a marquee promotion for a reason-but it’s at LEAST watchable.

Of course, it’s not exactly the best thing I’ve ever seen on MTV2. That of course involved one Chris Pontius…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4Xj8QzRaW68[/youtube]

Does enjoying Wildboyz make me kind of an idiot? I mean, I can accept that.

3. NHL: Washington Capitals @ Toronto Maple Leafs (Tuesday 7pm from Toronto live on Comcast SportsNet), Florida Panthers @ Washington Capitals (Wednesday 7pm from Verizon Center live on Comcast SportsNet PLUS), Washington Capitals @ Florida Panthers (Saturday 7pm from Sunrise, FL live on Comcast SportsNet); College Hockey: NCAA Frozen Four-Minnesota Duluth vs. Notre Dame (Thursday 5pm from St. Paul, MN live on ESPN2 & ESPN3.com), Michigan vs. North Dakota (Thursday 8:30pm from St. Paul, MN live on ESPN2 & ESPN3.com), National Championship Game (Saturday 7pm from St. Paul, MN live on ESPN & ESPN3.com)

And if after the game the Leafs and Caps decided to merge into one team, their logo would look something like the one on the right below (Thanks Puck Daddy!)…

leafs
And you know what? I don’t care for anything from Washington-but that’s actually kind of an awesome logo. I might be all in.

2. College Lacrosse: Fairfield @ Loyola (Saturday 1pm from Ridley Athletic Complex live on AM1570 WNST); Albany @ Johns Hopkins (Friday 7:30pm from Homewood Field live on ESPNU); Towson @ UMBC (Wednesday 7:30pm UMBC Stadium), Binghamton @ UMBC (Saturday 12pm from UMBC Stadium live on ABC2/ESPN3.com); UMass @ Towson (Saturday 1pm Unitas Stadium); Maryland @ Navy (Friday 7pm from Navy-Marine Corps Memorial Stadium live on CBS Sports); Stevenson @ Frostburg State (Wednesday 4pm Bobcat Stadium), Stevenson @ St. Mary’s (Saturday 1pm Seahawk Stadium)

It’s the big Baltimore County battle Wednesday night in Catonsville.  Representing the East Side…

towson

And from our friends on the West Side, an actual photo from the women’s bathroom inside the Chemistry building at UMBC…

umbc

So…you know…advantage Tigers and all.

1. Golf: PGA Tour-The Masters (Thursday & Friday 3pm live on ESPN, Saturday 3:30pm Sunday 2pm live on CBS. All Golf from Augusta, GA)

With no offense to the nerds (like Drew Forrester) who will watch this pantsless this weekend, there’s only one REAL reason to watch this event (unless somehow Tiger Woods starts playing golf again)….

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PRv6JwWk4As[/youtube]

Hello friends.

Flexing my mic muscles since 1983…

-G

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Top 10 Baseball Distractions

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Top 10 Baseball Distractions

Posted on 28 March 2011 by Glenn Clark

Honorable Mention: Auto Racing-NASCAR Goody’s Fast Relief 500 (Sunday 1pm from Martinsville, VA live on FOX); Golf-PGA Tour Shell Houston Open (Thursday & Friday 3pm live on Golf Channel, Saturday & Sunday 3pm live on NBC. All golf from Humble, TX), Champions Tour Mississippi Gulf Resort Classic (Friday & Saturday 6:30pm, Sunday 7pm from Biloxi, MS live on Golf Channel), LPGA Tour Kraft Nabisco Championship (Thursday & Friday 12pm, Saturday & Sunday 4:30pm from Rancho Mirage, CA live on Golf Channel); Horse Racing: Florida Derby (Sunday 5pm from Hallandale Beach, FL live on HRTV); Boxing: Friday Night Fights-Henry Lundy vs. Patrick Lopez (Friday 9pm from Mashantucket, CT live on ESPN2); Arena Football: AFL Jacksonville Sharks @ Tampa Bay Storm (Friday 8pm from Tampa Bay live on NFL Network); Women’s College Basketball: NCAA Tournament-Elite 8 (Tuesday from Philadelphia & Dallas live on ESPN), Final Four (Sunday from Indianapolis live on ESPN)

10. Lil’ Wayne (Sunday 7pm Verizon Center); Sara Bareilles (Sunday 6:30pm Rams Head Live); Mike Doughty (Friday 9pm IOTA Club & Cafe); Tim Reynolds (Friday 8pm & 10pm Blues Alley DC); Blue Man Group (Wednesday-Sunday Warner Theatre); YES (Monday 8pm Warner Theatre); Judah Friedlander (Thursday-Sunday DC Improv); Radiohead “The King of Limbs” available in stores/on iTunes (Tuesday)

I just saw Weezy at 1st Mariner Arena. It was a great time. I especially liked the part when he re-enacted that scene from “Beetlejuice”…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=c7tOAGY59uQ[/youtube]

I used to like Soul Coughing. Now I like Mike Doughty. If you listen to “The Morning Reaction” (and give me one reason why you wouldn’t!), you might be familiar with him…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qktIKYZJYs8[/youtube]

Tim Reynolds is pretty much an unofficial member of Dave Matthews Band at this point. I’m sure you’ll understand why…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lf1j1zrnxss[/youtube]

I’m not nearly the Radiohead fan that some folks are. But if the stuff on their new record is as good as this, I might get back on the bus…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pKd06s1LNik[/youtube]

9. Beer, Bourbon & BBQ Festival (Friday & Saturday Timonium Fairgrounds)

The first time I went to Beer Bourbon BBQ I ended up looking like this…

bbb

Yep…that’s me…probably a few pounds ago. I’m the one on the left.

Is there anything else you need to know about the event?

8. NBA: Miami Heat @ Washington Wizards (Wednesday 7pm from Verizon Center live on Comcast SportsNet), Cleveland Cavaliers @ Washington Wizards (Friday 7pm from Verizon Center live on Comcast SportsNet), Washington Wizards @ Charlotte Bobcats (Sunday 6pm from Charlotte live on Comcast SportsNet)

There’s a LeBron James joke in here somewhere…but I’m much too lowbrow.

So instead…the Wizards suck.

Oh-but the ‘Zards have Javale McGee, who tends to be good for a highlight a night in the midst of his team getting their asses handed to them. Again.

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oKEoJ1MxEkE[/youtube]

7. Tennis: ATP Tour & WTA Tour Sony Ericsson Open (Tuesday 11am live on Tennis Channel, Wednesday 1pm & 7pm live on ESPN2, Thursday 1pm live on ESPN2, Friday 1pm & 7pm live on ESPN2, Saturday 12:30pm live on CBS 3pm live on Tennis Channel, Sunday 1pm live on CBS)

So…did anyone else see the Top Spin 4 commercial with Serena Williams???

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7SQjR11L34c[/youtube]

Umm….I….ummm….I think I need a glass of water here.

6. NHL: Carolina Hurricanes @ Washington Capitals (Tuesday 7pm from Verizon Center live on Comcast SportsNet), Columbus Blue Jackets @ Washington Capitals (Thursday 7pm from Verizon Center live on VERSUS & Comcast SportsNet), Buffalo Sabres @ Washington Capitals (Saturday 7pm from Verizon Center live on Comcast SportsNet & NHL Network)

If you care about the Caps, there are two WNST Moosehead Puck Buses this week. I encourage you to hop aboard.

I don’t like Washington and don’t care about the Caps myself, so I have other hockey-related thoughts to share.

I’m headed out to Phoenix this week for a quick vacation. It’s just too cold here. I’m very excited because I get to see the Coyotes Friday night. (They’re playing the Colorado Avalanche.) As I’ve said before, I root for the ‘Yotes because we never had a team in Charm City.

I just found out yesterday that Friday night is Ilya Bryzgalov bobblehead night. I’m FREAKING OUT…

bryz

I actually think I might wear his old mask to the game…

bryz

5. Mixed Martial Arts: UFC “The Ultimate Fighter: Team Lesnar vs. Team Dos Santos” premieres (Wednesday 9pm SpikeTV); Strikeforce Challengers: Justin Wilcox vs. Rodrigo Damm (Friday 11pm from Stockton, CA live on Showtime)

Don’t ask me why-but for some reason Holly Madison’s show “Holly’s World” gets recorded on the DVR at my house.

Like I said, don’t ask.

But the show was on recently (I’m not sure who was watching it-I mean, it couldn’t have been me, right?) and Dana White was sitting with Holly discussing business ideas.

You’re asking yourself “Glenn, why in the hell are you writing about Dana White chatting with Holly Madison in the MMA category of this post?”

It’s simple. There’s a girl on that show named Jayde Nicole. I can now post a picture of her. There had to be a reason…

jayde

4. Soccer: Team USA vs. Paraguay (Tuesday 8pm from Nashville live on Fox Soccer Channel); MLS: DC United @ Colorado Rapids (Sunday 7pm from Commerce City, CO live on Galavision)

I assume we’re going to anoint Juan Agudelo the savior of American soccer because he scored a goal Saturday night against Argentina and he’s only 18 years old.

It’s probably wildly unrealistic.

But ehh…we need something about American soccer to get excited about. Agudelo for savior!

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kv3NFWNjUoE[/youtube]

3. College Lacrosse: Loyola @ Ohio State (Saturday 1pm from Columbus, OH live on AM1570 WNST); Hofstra @ Towson (Saturday 12pm from Unitas Stadium on ABC2 & ESPN3.com); Big City Classic: Johns Hopkins vs. North Carolina (Sunday 4pm from East Rutherford, NJ live on ESPNU); Maryland @ Virginia (Saturday 12pm from Charlottesville live on ESPNU); Navy @ Georgetown (Friday 7pm Kehoe Field); Marymount @ Stevenson (Saturday 4pm Caves Athletic Complex)

The Greyhounds are headed out to face Ohio State, huh? Maybe while they’re in town they can get their picture taken with Jim Tressel!!!

tressel

If they pay an extra 30 or 40 bucks, maybe he’ll even look at the camera! (Thanks Deadspin!)

2. Pro Wrestling: WWE Wrestlemania 27 (Sunday 8pm from Atlanta live on Pay-Per-View)

I don’t care what else happens at Wrestlemania Sunday night. I only care that The Rock will be there. Life is good.

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AV0bDp8Du2Q[/youtube]

1. College Basketball: NCAA Tournament Final Four-Kentucky vs. UConn (Saturday 6pm from Houston live on CBS), Butler vs. VCU (Saturday 8:45pm from Houston live on CBS); National Championship Game (Monday 9:21pm from Houston live on CBS)

These things we know….

A-The NCAA should be ashamed as they watch Jim Calhoun and John Calipari square off Saturday night.

Absolutely ASHAMED.

B-The entire country will be rooting for whoever wins the Butler-VCU game on Monday night.

C-We love Jim Nantz around here…but Gus Johnson should ABSOLUTELY be calling these games. Check out his Funny or Die and then this piece of football awesomeness…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=crfYXejxYfI[/youtube]

Flexing my mic muscles since 1983…

-G

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Top 10 Baseball Distractions

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Top 10 Baseball Distractions

Posted on 21 March 2011 by Glenn Clark

Honorable Mention: Tennis-ATP Tour & WTA Tour Sony Ericsson Open (Satuday-Monday 11am from Miami live on Tennis Channel); NBA: Washington Wizards @ Portland Trailblazers (Tuesday 10pm from Portland live on Comcast SportsNet), Washington Wizards @ Los Angeles Clippers (Wednesday 10:30pm from Los Angeles live on Comcast SportsNet), Washington Wizards @ Denver Nuggets (Wednesday 9pm from Denver live on Comcast SportsNet), Washington Wizards @ Golden State Warriors (Sunday 9pm from Oakland live on Comcast SportsNet); Auto Racing: NASCAR Auto Club 400 (Sunday 3pm from Fontana, CA live on FOX); Horse Racing: UAE Derby (Saturday 10am from Meydan City, Dubai live on HRTV), Louisiana Derby (Saturday 5pm from New Orleans live on HRTV); Arena Football: AFL Spokane Shock vs. Iowa Barnstormers (Friday 8pm from Des Moines, Iowa live on NFL Network)

10. Elton John (Saturday 8pm 1st Mariner Arena); Sick Puppies & Framing Hanley (Wednesday 7pm Rams Head Live); Kingston Trio (Sunday 4pm & 7pm Rams Head On Stage); Cold War Kids (Saturday 8pm 9:30 Club), All Time Low & Yellowcard (Monday 5:30pm 9:30 Club); Stryper (Tuesday 7pm Bourbon Street), CKY (Sunday 7pm Bourbon Street); Janet Jackson (Tuesday & Thursday 8pm D.A.R. Constitution Hall); Stanley Clarke & Victor Wooten (Wednesday 7pm State Theatre); The Strokes “Angles”, Green Day “Awesome as F**k”, Soundgarden “Live on I-5″ available in stores/on iTunes (Tuesday)

I could post songs from four different acts coming to town next week-but in all fairness, only one of them is Elton John.

Therefore, here are four Elton John songs. I’m sure you understand.

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y2Ta0qCG8No[/youtube]
[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RhJHL34DiBY[/youtube]
[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UxE7y1gSNPE[/youtube]
[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mBCVEcjScTQ[/youtube]

9. Roller Derby: Charm City Roller Girls (Saturday 5:30pm Du Burns Arena)

Does anyone remember the “Roller Jam” show that used to be on TNN a few years back???

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RJuryj90RpQ[/youtube]

Holy hell. How did that show not last? That’s Jerry Springer-quality awesome. “Awesome sauce” in fact.

(If you’re a “Parks & Recreation” fan and that last line meant something to you, you’re a hero to me.)

8. Golf: PGA Tour Arnold Palmer Invitational (Thursday & Friday 3pm live on Golf Channel, Saturday & Sunday 2:30pm live on NBC. All golf from Orlando); LPGA Tour Kia Classic (Thursday-Saturday 3:30pm, Sunday 4pm live on Golf Channel)

Phil Mickelson and Tiger Woods are going to play in Orlando…which means that if you so choose to, you can watch two bad golfers on television this weekend.

I enjoy the Arnold Palmer Invitational, but in my neighborhood we always called it the “Half & Half” Invitational.

Anyone?

Also-why can’t I post the Family Guy “Old People Agree With Arnold Palmer” clip here? It’s nowhere to be found on YouTube…or anywhere else. It’s pretty funny. And pretty honest. I think I’m starting to feel more and more like Arnold Palmer at age 27.

7. NHL: Washington Capitals @ Philadelphia Flyers (Tuesday 7:30pm from Philly live on VERSUS), Washington Capitals @ Ottawa Senators (Friday 7:30pm from Ottawa live on Comcast SportsNet PLUS), Washington Capitals @ Montreal Canadiens (Saturday 7pm from Montreal live on Comcast SportsNet & NHL Network)

With the Caps playing in the City of Brotherly Love this week, I get the chance to rag on Drew Forrester-sharing memories of Bobby Clarke, Ron Hextall, Ken Linseman and Joffrey Lupul.

In fact, here’s a small gift for my “Morning Reaction” cohort…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S8KVx8vDlYw[/youtube]

6. Mixed Martial Arts: UFC Fight Night Live-Antonio Rogerio Nogueira vs. Phil Davis (Saturday 10pm from Seattle live on SpikeTV); Bellator Fighting Championships 38: Tim Carpenter vs. Daniel Gracie (Saturday 7pm from Tunica Resorts, MS live on MTV2); Titan Fighting Championships 17 (Friday 10pm from Kansas City live on HDNet)

Did you miss Jon “Bones” Jones’ complete DESTRUCTION of former UFC light heavyweight champ Mauricio “Shogun” Rua this past weekend? Here’s some highlights, courtesy of ESPN…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8FciP4UFe88[/youtube]

I haven’t seen such a one-sided fight since The Undertaker completely destroyed Triple H at Wrestlemania X-7…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5ht3J06SVIg[/youtube]

Oh wait…I guess we’re supposed to be pretending like that fight never happened…

5. Women’s College Basketball: Georgetown @ Maryland (Tuesday 7pm from Comcast Center live on ESPN2 & ESPN3.com); other games Tuesday, Saturday-Monday on ESPN2 & ESPN3.com

Thus far we’ve seen a lot of YouTube videos, but absolutely no pictures of attractive women.

Does it make me sexist that I waited until the “Women’s College Basketball” section to consider attractive women? At least I said “attractive women” instead of “sexy broads”, right?

The below picture is of former Playboy model Tiffany Taylor, a University of Maryland graduate. So, you know, once again…Terrapins > Hoyas.

tifftaylor

4. College Basketball: NCAA Tournament Sweet 16-San Diego State vs. UConn (Thursday 7:15pm from Anaheim live on CBS), Florida vs. BYU (Thursday 7:27pm from New Orleans live on TBS), Duke vs. Arizona (Thursday 9:45pm from Anaheim live on CBS), Wisconsin vs. Butler (Thursday 9:57pm from New Orleans live on TBS), North Carolina vs. Marquette (Friday 7:15pm from Newark live on CBS), Kansas vs. Richmond (Friday 7:27pm from San Antonio live on TBS), Ohio State vs. Kentucky (Friday 9:45pm from Newark live on CBS), Florida State vs. VCU (Friday 9:57pm from San Antonio live on TBS); Elite 8 games Saturday & Sunday live on CBS

The good news? With Jimmer Fridette and the Cougars still very much alive, CBS & Turner intelligently decided to send “Mr. March Madness” Gus Johnson to the Big Easy.

That leads us to the fantastic video of Johnson calling the Jacksonville Jaguars’ Hail Mary victory over the Houston Texans this season, courtesy of “imaU2fan” on Twitter. This is pretty good…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Wap6gGcVDAA&feature=youtu.be[/youtube]

3. College Lacrosse: Loyola @ Mt. St. Mary’s (Saturday 1pm from Waldron Family Stadium live on AM1570 WNST); Virginia @ Johns Hopkins (Saturday 2pm from Homewood Field live on ESPNU); Quinnipiac @ UMBC (Saturday 3:30pm UMBC Stadium); Towson @ Delaware (Saturday 1pm from Newark, DE live on ABC2 & ESPN3.com); North Carolina @ Maryland (Saturday 12pm from Byrd Stadium live on ESPNU); Colgate @ Navy (Saturday 12pm Navy-Marine Corps Memorial Stadium); Tufts @ Stevenson (Wednesday 4pm Caves Athletic Complex), Scranton @ Stevenson (Saturday 12pm Caves Athletic Complex)

Both the Cavaliers and Tar Heels are coming to town this weekend. Conveniently, I can’t stand the Cavaliers or the Tar Heels.

Not all of the memories between the Terps and UNC are positive, but here’s one I like…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m0SnOgHx3eg[/youtube]

2. Soccer: MISL Championship-Milwaukee Wave @ Baltimore Blast (Friday 1st Mariner Arena); Argentina @ Team USA (Saturday 7pm from East Rutherford, NJ live on ESPN2); MLS-DC United @ New England Revolution (Saturday 4:30pm from Foxborough, MA live on Comcast SportsNet)

Attention people of Wisconsin: I appreciate what your Green Bay Packers did in the Super Bowl. In fact, I’ll always be grateful.

But on Friday night, I hope you lose. Terribly. Preferably something along the lines of 400,000 to zero.

But I’ll still be grateful that you beat the Steelers. And I’ll be grateful that “That 70′s Show” was set there. I always thought “Mila Kunis or Laura Prepon” should have been the “Ginger or Maryann” of my generation…

kunisprepon

1. Boxing: Yuriorkis Gamboa vs. Jorge Solis (Saturday 9:45pm from Atlantic City live on HBO)

You’re thinking to yourself: “Who the hell are these guys?”

The response: “who cares?”

The reason why this fight is #1 on the list is that Ravens S Tom Zbikowski is scheduled to fight on the undercard.

As I told Tom two weeks ago, I’m a Notre Dame hater in general. But I pull for him…even if I pull for Georgia Tech when I’m watching “Rudy.”

Feel better Fighting Irish lovers. You know I still cry during this scene…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mZ7ZpLgkVxA[/youtube]

Flexing my mic muscles since 1983…

-G

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Top 10 Baseball Distractions

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Top 10 Baseball Distractions

Posted on 14 March 2011 by Glenn Clark

Honorable Mention: Golf-PGA Tour Transitions Championship (Thursday & Friday 3pm live on Golf Channel, Saturday & Sunday 3pm live on NBC. All golf from Tampa Bay, FL); Boxing: Friday Night Fights-Demetrius Hopkins vs. Brad Solomon (Friday 9pm from Hollywood, FL live on ESPN2), Lucian Bute vs. Brian Magee (Saturday 10pm from Montreal live on Showtime); Horse Racing: Rebel Stakes (Saturday 5pm from Hot Springs, Arkansas live on HRTV); Arena Football-AFL: Philadelphia Soul @ Chicago Rush (Friday 8pm from Chicago live on NFL Network); Soccer: MLS-Columbus Crew @ DC United (Saturday 7:30pm RFK Stadium)

10. Pete Yorn (Tuesday 7pm Rams Head Live), Cold (Thursday 7pm Rams Head Live), Halestorm & Charm City Devils (Saturday 7pm Rams Head Live); Mike Epps (Saturday 8pm 1st Mariner Arena), Lil’ Wayne (Sunday 7pm 1st Mariner Arena); Phil Lesh & Bob Weir (Thursday 8pm Patriot Center); Travie McCoy (Sunday 6pm Recher Theatre); America (Tuesday 8pm Rams Head On Stage); Loretta Lynn (Thursday 7pm 9:30 Club); 2nd Annual Hippodrome Foodie Experience with Alton Brown (Saturday 6pm Hippodrome); The Fighter” and “WWE True Story of Wrestlemania” available on DVD/Blu-Ray (Tuesday)

Drew Forrester and I will be Rams Head Tuesday night, because Pete Yorn is outstanding…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zginCd6D0as[/youtube]

John Allen is a Charm City rock icon. That is all.

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qmHauE5ODe4[/youtube]

If you’re not a Weezy fan, I don’t think we can be friends. Nicki Minaj is coming to town with him. I’d marry her.

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RfYcOYMNuXM[/youtube]

Is it possible for me to enjoy a Phil Lesh/Bob Weir show even if I don’t smoke pot? I mean, I dig Scarlet Begonias…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Kj_kK1j3CV0[/youtube]

9. St. Patrick’s Day (Thursday)

This year’s festivities will be a bit different, as basketball will be a bit of a priority Thursday. That being said, I need a couple of things to make my St. Patty’s Day better.

1-Bangers and Mash

bangers

2-Smithwick’s

smithwicks

3-Flogging Molly[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Trkx9xLb5X8[/youtube]

If your establishment has those three things and ample breathing room, please let me know. I will be in attendance.

8. Auto Racing: NASCAR Jeff Byrd 500 (Sunday 1pm from Bristol, TN live on FOX)

Bristol is a smaller track, which is supposed to make the race more exciting.
But really, how can it get any more exciting than THIS?!?!?!?

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1V78QFZxooQ[/youtube]

7. Tennis: ATP Tour & WTA Tour BNP Paribas Open (Tuesday & Wednesday 2pm live on Tennis Channel, Thursday 2pm & 10pm live on Tennis Channel, Friday 2pm & 6pm live on Tennis Channel 4pm & 11pm live on ESPN2, Saturday 7:30pm live on Tennis Channel 2pm & 4pm live on ABC, Sunday 2pm & 4pm live on ABC. All tennis from Indian Wells, CA)

The Indian Wells stop is one of the few tour stops on the schedule that goes two weeks despite not being a grand slam event.

Of note from what’s already happened in the draw, Donald Young defeated Andy Murray.

NO, NO…please don’t leave. I promise that’s the only tennis analysis you’ll find here. Instead, here’s the picture of Ana Ivanovic everyone likes so bad…

ivanovic

6. NBA: Washington Wizards @ Chicago Bulls (Tuesday 8pm from Chicago live on Comcast SportsNet), Washington Wizards @ Toronto Raptors (Friday 7pm from Toronto live on Comcast SportsNet PLUS), New Jersey Nets @ Washington Wizards (Sunday 1pm from Verizon Center live on Comcast SportsNet)

The ‘Zards haven’t done much of anything right this season…until this past weekend.

This past weekend they did a FANTASTIC job…of finding their way onto Blake Griffin posters!

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CHB5rNtha-A[/youtube]

Talk about giving fans EXACTLY what they paid their money for!

5. NHL: Washington Capitals @ Montreal Canadiens (Tuesday 7pm from Montreal live on Comcast SportsNet PLUS), Washington Capitals @ Detroit Red Wings (Wednesday 7:30pm from Detroit live on VERSUS & Comcast SportsNet), Washington Capitals @ New Jersey Devils (Friday 7pm from Newark, NJ live on NHL Network & Comcast SportsNet)

So everything that’s happened in the world of hockey recently has been about Zedano Charo. I’m not interested.

The only thing I care about in the world of hockey is the fact that the Phoenix Coyotes got two big points Sunday night against the Anaheim Ducks. But I don’t think anyone else cares, so I won’t go any further with it.

You know what, there’s nothing hockey interesting to post here. So instead I’ll post Zach Galifianakis’ monologue from Saturday Night Live. He KILLED…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-QnulJMA2FQ[/youtube]

Yeah. That’s better than hockey.

4. Women’s College Basketball: NCAA Tournament-St. Francis vs. Maryland (Sunday 12pm from Comcast Center live on ESPN2/ESPN3.com), Georgetown vs. Princeton (Sunday 2:30pm from Comcast Center live on ESPN2/ESPN3.com). More games Saturday-

While the Terrapins are involved, I’ll be paying attention to Women’s March Madness. In fact, I’ll probably even head down to College Park Sunday.

But if for some reason the season were to come to an end for the Terps, my interest in Women’s College Basketball would go right back to what it was before…

“What’s former UTEP star Claudia Lampe doing these days?”

UTEP

3. College Lacrosse: Denver @ Loyola (Wednesday 7pm from Ridley Athletic Complex live on AM1570 WNST), Loyola @ Air Force (Saturday 3pm from Colorado Springs, CO live on AM1570 WNST); UMBC @ Maryland (Friday 8pm from Byrd Stadium live on ABC 2 & ESPN3.com), St. Joseph’s @ Maryland (Sunday 1pm Byrd Stadium); Towson @ Navy (Tuesday 7pm Navy-Marine Corps Memorial Stadium); Stony Brook @ Towson (Saturday 1pm Unitas Stadium); Johns Hopkins @ Syracuse (Saturday 6pm from Syracuse, NY live on ESPNU); SUNY Cortland @ Stevenson (Saturday 1pm Caves Athletic Complex)

What do you think the chances are that Greyhounds nation will let me ride out to Colorado with them for the game with the Falcons? I just want to be there for the flyover…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8k5b7Pzmy74[/youtube]

By the way, I think the Hounds will beat Air Force Saturday. I don’t know if I would feel the same way if they were playing against Ivan Korshunov from Air Force One…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a1P1xOBvAyg[/youtube]

2. Mixed Martial Arts: UFC 128-Mauricio “Shogun” Rua vs. Jon “Bones” Jones (Saturday 10pm from Newark, NJ live on Pay-Per-View); Bellator Fighting Championships 37 (Saturday 7pm from Concho, OK live on MTV2)

I would suggest Baltimore be rooting for Bones Jones Saturday night, as his brother is Ravens DT Arthur Jones.

With no offense to Tom Zbikowski-who I’m pulling for-I know for SURE Saturday night’s fight will be more fulfilling than watching Zibby laugh at the Tomato Can he was placed in the ring against…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7TQIf9cMS_Y[/youtube]

If you’ve never seen Bones fight, he’s pretty freaking entertaining…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IQqiilaj1rs[/youtube]

1. College Basketball: NCAA Tournament-Butler vs. Old Dominion (Thursday 12:40pm from Verizon Center live on TruTV), Pitt vs. UNC Asheville/Arkansas-Little Rock (Thursday 3:10pm from Verizon Center live on TruTV), UConn vs. Bucknell (Thursday 7:20pm from Verizon Center live on TNT), Cincinnati vs. Missouri (Thursday 9:50pm from Verizon Center live on TNT) Other games Thursday-Sunday live on CBS, TNT, TBS and TruTV

I don’t care how many networks show the NCAA Tournament as long as two things happen.

1-They ALL play this song…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o4o_FZZ_Ccs[/youtube]

2-They somehow find a way to allow Gus Johnson to call every game…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GkiM3tBJVhk[/youtube]

Flexing my mic muscles since 1983…

-G

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Top 10 Baseball Distractions

Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

Top 10 Baseball Distractions

Posted on 07 March 2011 by Glenn Clark

Honorable Mention: NBA-Milwaukee Bucks @ Washington Wizards (Tuesday 7pm from Verizon Center live on Comcast SportsNet), Los Angeles Clippers @ Washington Wizards (Saturday 7pm from Verizon Center live on Comcast SportsNet), Oklahoma City Thunder @ Washington Wizards (Monday 7pm from Verizon Center live on Comcast SportsNet); Soccer: MISL-Missouri Comets @ Baltimore Blast (Sunday 5:05pm 1st Mariner Arena); Mixed Martial Arts: Bellator Fighting Championships 36 (Saturday 9pm from Shreveport, LA live on MTV2); Tennis-ATP Tour & WTA Tour BNP Paribas Open (Saturday-Monday 2pm from Indian Wells, CA live on Tennis Channel); Arena Football: AFL-Philadelphia Soul @ Pittsburgh Power (Friday 8pm from Pittsburgh live on NFL Network); Women’s College Basketball: Selection Monday (Monday 7pm ESPN)

10. Get The Led Out: The American Led Zeppelin (Saturday 7pm Rams Head Live); Boyz II Men (Monday 7pm Bourbon Street); America (Monday 8pm Rams Head On Stage); Grace Potter and the Nocturnals (Saturday 8pm 9:30 Club), Apocalyptica (Sunday 10pm 9:30 Club), Pete Yorn (Monday 7pm 9:30 Club); Shamrockfest feat. Dropkick Murphys and Carbon Leaf (Saturday RFK Stadium); Lupe Fiasco “Lasers”, R.E.M. “Collapse Into Now”, Billy Joel “Live at Shea Stadium” available in stores/on iTunes (Tuesday); Jackass 3 available on Blu-Ray & DVD (Tuesday)

Kind of a weaksauce week for live music, but there’s some decent stuff mixed in. I mean, what…IN THE WORLD…is better than CooleyHighHarmony???

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OHzkICG47LU[/youtube]

I’m a fan of Grace Potter…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oHlhOgQ36m8[/youtube]

There’s few better ways to prepare for St. Patty’s Day than Dropkick Murphys…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x-64CaD8GXw[/youtube]

and I freaking LOVE Carbon Leaf…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T1zs2yezmkE[/youtube]

And since I’m on a role, it’s about time Lupe Fiasco’s disc finally came out. This song was one of the best of 2010…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Rmp6zIr5y4U[/youtube]

9. Baltimore St. Patrick’s Day Parade (Sunday 2pm Downtown Baltimore), Shamrock 5K (Sunday 1:15pm Downtown Baltimore)

A 5k run is a surprising place to bump into Rex Ryan…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rPPfCmkfVKY[/youtube]

Not a surprising place to bump into Rex Ryan? The place where we bumped into him in Indianapolis during NFL Scouting Combine weekend…

steaknshake

8. Golf: WGC Cadillac Championship (Thursday & Friday 2pm live on Golf Channel, Saturday 2pm Sunday 3m live on NBC. All golf from Doral, FL); PGA Tour Puerto Rico Open (Thursday 6:30pm, Friday 11:30am, Saturday 6:30pm Sunday 7:30pm from Rio Grande, Puerto Rico on Golf Channel); Champions Tour Toshiba Classic (Friday 6:30pm, Saturday 9:30pm, Sunday 10:30pm from Newport Beach, CA on Golf Channel)

Yeah…I looked up to find out that Rory Sabbatini won the most recent golf event. I honest to God couldn’t tell you anything else going on in the sport, it is what it is.

So I wandered over to some golf blog page for more information about what was going on in golf. Holy hell was that terrible. There was actually information on how to tell two different types of golf balls apart. WHAT THE EFF? They’re golf balls. Hopefully someone put their initials on one of them or something.

Anyway, one of the blogs had an ad for something involving Izabel Goulart. I don’t know what it was, but I don’t care. It was the first interesting thing that happened during my quest for golf information.

goulart

7. NHL: Edmonton Oilers @ Washington Capitals (Wednesday 7pm from Verizon Center live on Comcast SportsNet), Carolina Hurricanes @ Washington Capitals (Friday 7pm from Verizon Center live on Comcast SportsNet), Chicago Blackhawks @ Washington Capitals (Sunday 12:30pm from Verizon Center live on NBC)

In hockey news, the Columbus Cottonmouths of the SPHL wore these jerseys for a “Fight Night” promotion this weekend. (Thanks Puck Daddy!)

cottonmouths

If the Caps would wear something like this, I might actually have a reason to give a hoot about them for a second or two.

6. Pro Wrestling: TNA Victory Road (Sunday 8pm from Orlando live on Pay-Per-View)

I guess TNA is supposed to be interesting now because 1-Sting is their champion, 2-Bart Scott has joined the fray…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5ZEFxLp6MQ8[/youtube]

3-Angelina from Jersey Shore is now part of TNA…

angelina

Nope. Still not really all that interested.

5. Boxing: Miguel Cotto vs. Ricardo Mayorga (Saturday 9pm from Las Vegas live on Showtime PPV); Sergio Martinez vs. Sergiy Dzinziruk (Saturday 10:30pm from Mashantucket, CT live on HBO); Jimmy Lange vs. Jimmy “The Fighting School Teacher” Holmes (Saturday 7pm Patriot Center)

The Cotto-Mayorga card is a pretty big deal all around, as both Joshua Clottey and Yuri Foreman are on the undercard.

The reason why Cotto-Mayorga is a big deal in Charm City however is because Ravens safety Tom Zbikowski is fighting on the undercard. We don’t know who he’s fighting, but whoever it is HAS to perform better than Robert Bell did five years ago at Madison Square Garden, right?

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J-8BYolVPVw[/youtube]

By the way, “Rudy” was on Encore Sunday-right after Little Giants. Raise your hand if you ALWAYS hate Notre Dame…right up until the point where Jon Favreau and the folks in South Bend start chanting Rudy’s name.

For the record, as soon as they finish carrying him off the Notre Dame Stadium field, I start hating Notre Dame again.

4. High School Basketball: MPSSAA Semifinals-4A: Eleanor Roosevelt vs. Patterson (Thursday 7pm), Magruder vs. North Point (Thursday 9pm); 3A: Milford Mill vs. Friendly (Thursday 3pm), South Hagerstown vs. Centennial (Thursday 5pm); 2A: Gwynn Park vs. Digital Harbor (Friday 7pm), South Carroll vs. Easton (Friday 9pm); Dunbar vs. Owings Mills (Friday 3pm), Williamsport vs. Pocomoke (Friday 5pm); Finals all day Saturday (All games at Comcast Center)

Unfortunately Monique Bassett couldn’t will my Perry Hall Gators all the way to College Park, but I’ll give her a pass in her first season.

My picks to win the state titles are Patterson, Milford Mill, Digital Harbor and Dunbar-but I don’t really know anything about the subject.

It’s not the only subject I don’t know much about but comment on anyway. For example, I don’t really know much of anything about women’s fashion, but I’d like to note that I approve of what Samara Weaving is wearing here. (Thanks Busted Coverage!)

weaving

3. Ed Block Courage Awards (Tuesday 5:30pm Martin’s West); Anquan Boldin “Chalk Talk” (Thursday 5pm Hill Field House-Morgan State)

Kinda tough to weave my way from Samara Weaving to the Ed Block Courage Awards, huh?

I won’t bother trying to be clever or funny here, and I definitely won’t bother trying to post a picture of an attractive gal. Instead I’ll channel Lance Storm and “be serious for a moment.”

If you didn’t read our own Nestor Aparicio’s column about Michael Vick’s night in Baltimore last year, I REALLY encourage you to do so. It will help explain this video…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Vmp-fMr31c0[/youtube]

2. College Basketball: ACC Tournament-Maryland vs. North Carolina State (Thursday 7pm from Greensboro, NC live on ESPN2), MEAC Tournament-Morgan State vs. North Carolina A&T (Thursday 8pm from Winston-Salem, NC streamed live at MEACHoops.com), Coppin State vs. Norfolk State/Howard winner (Thursday 6pm from Winston-Salem, NC streamed at MEACHoops.com); Selection Sunday (Sunday 6pm CBS)

Just a year ago, I was sitting outside the Greensboro Coliseum on a Friday afternoon thinking about a weekend that would either involve watching the Terps make a run towards an ACC Championship or watching the Morgan Bears try to clinch their second straight March Madness berth.

The Terrapins didn’t keep their end of the bargain, but Todd Bozeman’s Bears certainly did-and my weekend in the Triangle was OUTSTANDING.

This year…I think I’m gonna stick in the mid-atlantic.

Hey, Fang Mitchell’s Eagles still have a real chance of making the Tournament-but I’m not holding my breath that I’ll be needing to do another Selection Sunday special Sunday night on AM1570 WNST.

But if you have any interest in heading to Carolina for the weekend, I’d still encourage it. Just make sure you do these three things…

bojangles
cookout
biscuitville

1. College Lacrosse: Maryland @ Towson (Saturday 11am from Unitas Stadium live on ESPN3.com), Loyola @ Duke (Friday 7pm from Durham, NC live on AM1570 WNST), Lafayette @ Navy (Saturday 12pm Navy-Marine Corps Memorial Stadium), Lynchburg @ Stevenson (Saturday 1pm Caves Athletic Complex); Inside Lacrosse Konica Minolta Face-Off Classic: Syracuse vs. Georgetown (Saturday 11am) Cornell vs. Virginia (Saturday 1:30pm), Johns Hopkins vs. UMBC (Saturday 4pm) All games from M&T Bank Stadium live on ESPNU

So before we start filling out our NIT brackets in Baltimore, there’s a damn good day of lacrosse Saturday.

I’ll be at Maryland/Towson and Hopkins/UMBC Saturday for sure, and might try to poke in over in Owings Mills in between.

It’s a shame there’s so much going on in town Saturday, because if there wasn’t I would have gone down to Duke with the Greyhounds Friday night and then stuck around for the ACC or MEAC title games Saturday.

Instead, the Glenn Clark household will be torn over a battle of alma maters when the Terps face the Tigers Saturday morning. I want you to look closely at this picture before you decide whose side you’re going to support…

mdtowson

The great part is…I might have her so brainwashed that she mistakenly roots for Maryland on Saturday. HAHAHA!!!

Flexing my mic muscles since 1983…

-G

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Top 10 Baseball Distractions

Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

Top 10 Baseball Distractions

Posted on 28 February 2011 by Glenn Clark

Honorable Mention: Golf-PGA Tour Honda Classic (Thursday & Friday 3pm live on Golf Channel, Saturday & Sunday 3pm live on NBC. All golf from Palm Beach Gardens, FL); Harlem Globetrotters (Saturday 1pm Verizon Center; Friday & Saturday 7:30pm Patriot Center); Soccer: MISL-Chicago Riot @ Baltimore Blast (Friday 7:35pm 1st Mariner Arena); Boxing: Zab Judah vs. Kaizer Mabuza (Saturday 9pm from Newark, NJ live on Pay-Per-View)

10. Marc Broussard (Tuesday 7pm Rams Head Live), Ra Ra Riot (Thursday 7pm Rams Head Live), Rev Theory & Pop Evil (Friday 6:30pm Rams Head Live); Jah Works (Friday 7pm Bourbon Street), Ice Cube (Monday 8pm Bourbon Street); Tim Reynolds (Sunday 8pm Rams Head On Stage); Good Charlotte (Friday 6:30pm 9:30 Club), Scissor Sisters (Monday 7pm 9:30 Club); Get Up Kids (Tuesday 8pm Black Cat DC); Randy Newman (Wednesday 8pm Strathmore); Leon Redbone (Thursday 8pm Barns at Wolf Trap); Jeffrey Ross (Thursday-Sunday DC Improv); 127 Hours” and “Faster” available on DVD & Blu-Ray (Tuesday)

Marc Broussard makes me wish I wasn’t spending the week in Sarasota. Damnit!

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FuWPseegaKw[/youtube]

If you listen to “The Morning Reaction” on AM1570 WNST (and why the hell wouldn’t you?), you know Drew Forrester and I are ALL IN when it comes to Ra Ra Riot. They’re strong.

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mVun8pRhNQQ[/youtube]

Good Charlotte may be from Waldorf, but they’re huge Baltimore Orioles fans. Benji Madden and Joel Madden in fact BOTH have O’s tattoos if I remember right. Either way, Festival Song will ALWAYS hold a special place in my heart…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j4t54bPUvmg[/youtube]

I only know one song the Get Up Kids have ever done, and it was a cover of The Cure. But damn was it good…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ukcDTCRerIk[/youtube]

9. Tennis-Davis Cup: Team USA vs. Chile (Friday 9am & 12pm, Saturday 10am, Sunday 9am & 12pm from Santiago, Chile live on Tennis Channel)

I’d be much more excited about the Davis Cup if:

1-It were on a real TV channel. No offense Tennis Channel, but I’m the biggest tennis fan on the planet and even I don’t have the Tennis Channel.

2-The great American hope wasn’t Andy Roddick. I’ll enjoy the eye candy, but winning in Memphis two weeks ago doesn’t exactly make me suddenly hopeful he’s due for a career turnaround.

Of course, if A-Rod’s flu symptoms were to keep him out, we’d be left with John Isner.

ISN’T ANYONE IN THIS COUNTRY A GOOD TENNIS PLAYER?!?!?!?!?

8. Auto Racing: NASCAR Kobalt Tools 400 (Sunday 3pm from Las Vegas live on FOX)

I can think of a few things I’d rather do in Vegas than watch Jeff Gordon drive a car.

A-Piss away money on Freemont Street while watching bad cover bands.

B-Drink alcohol out of a football…

football

C-Almost anything involving Holly Madison…

holly

7. Women’s College Basketball: ACC  Tournament-Maryland vs. Georgia Tech/Virginia Tech winner (Friday 11am from Greensboro, NC live on Fox Sports Net nationally, Comcast SportsNet locally)

Well Terps fans…if you want to be excited about March Madness…I’d suggest you learn the names of the players on Brenda Frese’s team.

First name to learn? Diana Tchatchouang.

tchatch

What is Tchatchouang French for, you ask? Actually, Tchatchouang is French for “HUH?!?!”

6. NBA: Golden State Warriors @ Washington Wizards (Wednesday 7pm from Verizon Center live on Comcast SportsNet), Minnesota Timberwolves @ Washington Wizards (Saturday 7pm from Verizon Center live on Comcast SportsNet), Washington Wizards @ Detroit Pistons (Sunday 6pm from Auburn Hills, MI live on Comcast SportsNet PLUS)

Baltimore Terps fans-you don’t think things could be worse? You COULD root for the ‘Zards!

I don’t know how to polish this. The Wizards are unbelievably awful. It’s almost impossible. Making it worse this week, the teams playing the Wizards are awful too.

Why should you watch one of these games? Ummm….maybe their mascot G-Man will do something cool???

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KfBXFRSt4pE[/youtube]

5. High School Basketball: Baltimore Catholic League Championship Game-John Carroll vs. St. Frances (Tuesday 7pm Reitz Arena)

I LIKE the fact that the Patriots and the Panthers are getting together for their fourth showdown of the season.

I LOVE any sentence that includes the words “Catholic” and “school”…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uCgc-N7J2Mo[/youtube]

(Note-Stacy Keibler and Torrie Wilson unlikely to be at BCL title game Tuesday.)

4. NHL: New York Islanders @ Washington Capitals (Tuesday 7pm from Verizon Center live on Comcast SportsNet), St. Louis Blues @ Washington Capitals (Thursday 7pm from Verizon Center live on Comcast SportsNet), Washington Capitals @ Florida Panthers (Sunday 5pm from Sunrise, FL live on Comcast SportsNet), Washington Capitals @ Tampa Bay Lightning (Monday 7pm from Tampa live on VERSUS)

The trade deadline in the National Hockey League was Monday, and I was as surprised as anyone to see that the Caps dealt Sidney Ponson to the San Francisco Cows for Darin Blood.

(I think I just combined the Ponson and Joe Carter deals into one. God it sucks being an Orioles fan.)

All of those trades and they didn’t come up with Kenny Wu? I’m reminded of why I don’t root for the damn team…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IxSY4vClA4U[/youtube]

3. College Lacrosse: Bellarmine @ Loyola (Saturday 1pm from Ridley Athletic Complex live on AM1570 WNST); Towson @ Mt. St. Mary’s (Saturday 1pm Waldron Family Stadium)http://wnst.net/wordpress/glennclark/wp-admin/post.php?action=edit&post=10574; Princeton @ Johns Hopkins (Saturday 1pm from Homewood Field live on ESPNU); Bellarmine @ Maryland (Monday 3pm Byrd Stadium); Hood @ Stevenson (Wednesday 3pm Caves Athletic Complex)

With the Tigers and Blue Jays on the same field Saturday, there’s probably someone who can discover the cure for the common cold.

It’s too highfalutin for me. I’d rather look at picture of Kayla Love from Busted Coverage. Oh look…

kaylalove

2. Mixed Martial Arts: UFC on VERSUS-Diego Sanchez vs. Martin Kampmann (Thursday 9pm from Louisville live on VERSUS), Strikeforce Columbus: Dan Henderson vs. Rafael “Feijao” Calvacante (Saturday 10pm from Columbus live on Showtime)

Boy, I miss the days when it was a big deal when “Hendo” faught. Probably won’t be the case on Saturday night.

Martin Kampmann will join Thyrl Nelson and John Rallo on “The MMA Report” Tuesday at 1:30pm on AM1570 WNST. Then he’ll fight a guy who craps in the woods…honestly…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3KuHz0IEPxQ[/youtube]

1. College Basketball: Maryland @ Miami (Wednesday 7pm from Coral Gables, FL live on ESPNU), Virginia @ Maryland (Saturday 2pm from Comcast Center live on ACC Network-WNUV 54 in Charm City); Morgan State @ Coppin State (Thursday 7:30pm Coppin State Physical Education Complex); MAAC Tournament-Loyola vs. St. Peter’s (Saturday 2pm from Bridgeport, Conn. live on MSG Network); America East Tournament-UMBC vs. Binghamton (Thursday 8:15pm from Hartford, Conn. streamed live at AmericaEast.com); CAA Tournament-Towson vs. Drexel (Friday 2:30pm from Richmond, streamed live at CAASports.com)

It’s march and I’m mad!

That’s mostly because the Terrapins have absolutely no shot at going to the NCAA Tournament.

Oh well. UVa still sucks. Except for Dave Matthews Band…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cCBlvTfuoPQ[/youtube]

Flexing my mic muscles since 1983…

-G

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Top 10 Baseball Distractions

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Top 10 Baseball Distractions

Posted on 21 February 2011 by Glenn Clark

Honorable Mention: Women’s College Basketball-Virginia Tech @ Maryland (Thursday 7:30pm Comcast Center); Boxing: Miguel Acosta vs. Brandon Rios (Saturday 10pm from Las Vegas live on Showtime), Friday Night Fights: Juan Carlos Burgos vs. Cristobal Cruz (Friday 9pm from Tulsa, Oklahoma live on ESPN2); Tennis: ATP Tour Delray Beach International Tennis Championships (Saturday 2pm & 7pm, Sunday 1pm & 3pm from Delray Beach, FL live on Tennis Channel), Abierto Mexicano Telcel (Wednesday 4pm & 8pm, Thursday 2pm & 8pm, Friday 6pm & 10pm, Saturday 10am from Acapulco, Mexico live on ESPN3.com), Dubai Duty Free Tennis Championships (Monday-Friday 5am & 10am, Saturday 10am from Dubai, United Arab Emirates live on ESPN3.com)

10. Bon Jovi (Sunday 7:30pm Verizon Center), Lady Gaga (Thursday 8pm Verizon Center); Pat Green (Saturday 7pm Rams Head Live, Wednesday 7pm 9:30 Club); Robert Cray Band (Tuesday 8pm Rams Head On Stage); David Gray (Tuesday 7:30pm Strathmore); Charlie Murphy (Thursday-Sunday DC Improv); Pat McGee Band (Friday 7:30pm Birchmere); Ryan Cabrera (Monday 8pm Jammin’ Java); G. Love “Fixin To Die” available in stores/on iTunes (Tuesday)

I saw Bon Jovi a few years ago at Jobing.com Arena in Glendale, Arizona. I was disappointed. He played country pop songs. I didn’t pay to see that. I actually didn’t pay at all. But if I had, THIS is what I would have wanted to see…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=40UQDEtRxp8[/youtube]

I like Pat McGee AND Pat Green. I also like Pat Sajak, but I don’t like Pat Boone necessarily.

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mzTL2woRzrI[/youtube]
[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fJWnIFlYKjs[/youtube]

Even our buddy Rob Fahey (of Ravyns fame) says he’s most impressed by David Gray of current musicians. That’s high praise…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sMxfKuft8x4[/youtube]

And even without the “Special Sauce”, I’d recommend picking up the new G. Love…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nCPH3dPQkIc[/youtube]

9. NBA: Indiana Pacers @ Washington Wizards (Tuesday 7pm from Verizon Center live on Comcast SportsNet), Washington Wizards @ Philadelphia 76ers (Wednesday 7pm from Philadelphia live on Comcast SportsNet), Washington Wizards @ Miami Heat (Friday 7:30pm from Miami live on Comcast SportsNet), Dallas Mavericks @ Washington Wizards (Saturday 8pm from Verizon Center live on Comcast SportsNet PLUS), Chicago Bulls @ Washington Wizards (Monday 7pm from Verizon Center live on Comcast SportsNet)

It used to be that when the Chicago Bulls would come to play the ‘Zards (or the Bullets, really), the games would actually mean something.

Now…they’re just the next team on the schedule…that will probably beat the Wizards.

That being said, they still have SOMETHING going for them…in fact, the best player in the history of NBA Jam…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DkM0BE-Iu6M[/youtube]

Benny the Bull was better than Michael Jordan.

Probably a better golfer, too.

8. Auto Racing: NASCAR Subway Fresh Fit 500 (Sunday 3pm from Phoenix live on FOX)

With the fellas on the Sprint Cup Series headed into Arizona, I’d take a second to remind everyone that Daytona 500 winner Trevor Bayne and company will have a few of their own “distractions” to deal with…

asu
asu
asu

I’ve had the water out there. There IS something in it.

7. Golf: WGC Accenture Match Play Championship (Wednesday 12pm, Thursday & Friday 2pm, Saturday 12pm, Sunday 9am live on Golf Channel; Saturday & Sunday 2pm live on NBC. All golf from Marana, AZ); PGA Tour Mayakoba Golf Classic at Riviera Maya-Cancun (Thursday-Saturday 6:30pm, Sunday 7pm from Playa del Carmen, Mexico live on Golf Channel); LPGA Tour HSBC Women’s Champions (Thursday & Friday 11am, Saturday 10am, Sunday 2pm from Singapore live on Golf Channel)

This will be the only week all year that I give half a crap about Golf. Why? Because I get to fill out brackets! You could put together a Pokemon card tournament-if it had brackets, I’d fill them out.

I mean, I’m not going to WATCH the thing…holy hell does that sound terrible. But I’ll check at the end of the day to see how my brackets hold up. And I’ll of course pick  Chi Chi Rodriguez to win. He’s going to have to break through one of these weeks.

6. NHL: New York Rangers @ Washington Capitals (Friday 7pm from Verizon Center live on Comcast SportsNet PLUS & NHL Network), Washington Capitals @ New York Islanders (Saturday 7pm from New York live on Comcast SportsNet)

Meanwhile, Glenn Clark will be making the trip up I-95 to Philly to see the Philadelphia Flyers become JUST ANOTHER VICTIM for the Phoenix FREAKING Coyotes, who enter the game winners of seven in a row!

It’s just a shame the game isn’t in Arizona, cause I’d love to hear the Black Keys pump through the Wells Fargo Center…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UfYLr3IIVkQ[/youtube]

5. Monster Jam (Friday-Sunday 1st Mariner Arena)

Monster Jam is one of those events that comes around all the time that I have no REAL idea what it is and if it’s sorta white trash but really cool or REALLY white trash and only sorta cool.

Either way, I THINK Grave Digger is pretty cool….right???

gravedigger

4. Mixed Martial Arts: UFC 127-BJ Penn vs. Jon Fitch (Saturday 10pm from Sydney, AUS on Pay-Per-View)

After the last card (Anderson Silva vs. Vitor Belfort) and the next card (Jon “Bones” Jones vs. Mauricio “Shogun” Rua), I will admit that I’m not really all that upset that I’ll be missing this card while I’m in Indy.

But if I was a MMA writer/reporter headed Down Under, I know damn well I’d take a minute to seek out whoever Bliss N Eso are. Their Citizen Cope cover is pretty legit…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aCIfpZp7YcA[/youtube]

3. College Lacrosse: Loyola @ Towson (Saturday 12pm from Unitas Stadium live on ABC2/ESPN3.com/AM1570 WNST); Rutgers @ UMBC (Saturday 1pm UMBC Stadium); Siena @ Johns Hopkins (Saturday 1pm from Homewood Field live on ESPNU); Georgetown @ Maryland (Saturday 3pm from Byrd Stadium live on ESPNU); Mary Washington @ Stevenson (Wednesday 3pm Caves Athletic Complex), Kean @ Stevenson (Saturday 1pm Caves Athletic Complex)

I don’t know about the rest of you, but when I see “Georgetown” and “Maryland” next to each other, I can really only think about Keith Booth and Joe Smith. Hoyas fans probably won’t be happy for the reminder…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K-WoPhVNffA[/youtube]

I guess I have one other memory. It involves Lonny Baxter and the NCAA Tournament if I remember correctly…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Nda5RartfAw[/youtube]

2. College Basketball: Florida State @ Maryland (Wednesday 9pm from Comcast Center live on ACC Network-WNUV 54 locally), Maryland @ North Carolina (Sunday 7:45pm from Chapel Hill, NC live on Comcast SportsNet-Fox Sports Net nationally); Delaware State @ Morgan State (Wednesday 7pm Hill Field House), Morgan State @ North Carolina A&T (Monday 7pm from Greensboro, NC live on ESPNU); Drexel @ Towson (Saturday 4pm Towson Center)

I hope the Terps beat the snot out of the Seminoles Wednesday night. But I will admit that FSU will always have at least a small place in my (and Brett Favre’s) heart(s)…

sterger

Jenn Sterger wore a cowboy hat to a football game in Tallahassee five years ago and became a household name.

What a great country we live in.

1. College Football: NFL Scouting Combine (Thursday-Monday from Indianapolis live on NFL Network)

5.2 million people watched the Scouting Combine from LucasOil Stadium last year.

Of those 5.2 million, not a single one tuned in to see how Rich Eisen did in the 40 yard dash. But he did it anyway, and almost beat Ravens DT Terrence Cody!

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ar5nlv6ZPX0[/youtube]

That might seem surprising, but consider this…if hundreds of college-aged GIRLS were to descend upon a football stadium and run around in the underwear, how many MORE people would be watching?

You know, especially if one of them was SI swimsuit model Kate Upton…

upton

Flexing my mic muscles since 1983…

-G

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Top 10 Baseball Distractions

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Top 10 Baseball Distractions

Posted on 14 February 2011 by Glenn Clark

Honorable Mention: Golf-PGA Tour Northern Trust Open (Thursday & Friday 3pm live on Golf Channel, Saturday & Sunday 3pm live on CBS. All golf from Pacific Palisades, CA), Champions Tour ACE Group Classic (Friday & Saturday 6:30pm, Sunday 7pm from Naples, FL live on Golf Channel), Honda LPGA Thailand (Friday 12:30pm, Saturday & Sunday 3pm from Chonburi, Thailand live on Golf Channel); High School Basketball: Parkville @ Perry Hall (Wednesday 6:30pm); Boxing: Friday Night Fights-Fernando Guerrero vs. Saul Roman (Friday 7pm from Wicomico Civic Center live on ESPN2), Fernando Montiel vs. Nonito Donaire (Friday 9:45pm from Las Vegas live on HBO); Tennis: ATP Tour Regions Morgan Keegan Championships (Saturday 11am, Sunday 3pm from Memphis live on Tennis Channel)

10. Salt-N-Pepa/Naughty By Nature/MC Lyte/Kool Moe Dee/Kurtis Blow (Saturday 8pm 1st Mariner Arena); Plain White T’s/Parachute (Friday 7pm Rams Head Live); Taproot (Saturday 6:30pm Bourbon Street); Vusi Mahlasela (Monday 8pm Rams Head On Stage); Slightly Stoopid (Wednesday & Thursday 6:30pm 9:30 Club), Drive-By Truckers (Friday & Saturday 8pm 9:30 Club), Los Lobos (Monday 7pm 9:30 Club); Pablo Francisco (Thursday-Sunday DC Improv); John Mellencamp (Tuesday 7pm D.A.R. Constitution Hall), Avett Brothers (Friday 8pm D.A.R. Constitution Hall); Herb Alpert (Wednesday 7:30pm Birchmere), Bacon Brothers (Saturday & Sunday 7:30pm Birchmere); Big Head Todd & The Monsters (Thursday 8pm Strathmore); Buddy Jewell (Thursday 7pm Severna Park High School)

You’re not going to catch me saying a negative word about Salt, Pepa or Spindarella. They’re strong.

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bZg_Jehko7c[/youtube]

A few weeks ago, I woke up to a video of Dave Matthews Band and Vusi Mahlasela playing “Everyday” in my Hotmail Inbox. I had never heard of Vusi Mahlasela. I immediately wanted to hear more…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=W4JhCTbmBQ4[/youtube]

John Mellencamp rules. Not much else I can say about that…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wsEwK69LXjQ[/youtube]

I haven’t had a chance to listen much to the Avett Brothers. That’s my mistake…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=d1XMHGVOXZ8[/youtube]

9. Soccer: MISL-Omaha Vipers @ Baltimore Blast (Friday 7:35pm 1st Mariner Arena), Milwaukee Wave @ Baltimore Blast (Sunday 5:05pm 1st Mariner Arena)

It’s been a long time since I’ve included soccer on the list. So I had to reference Yahoo! Sports’ Dirty Tackle blog to find out what I had missed.

Apparently Wesley Sneijder scored a nifty goal for the Netherlands in a friendly against Austria…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0Wyfxk54v3w[/youtube]

And some dude had his pants fall down while trying to take a picture with Lionel Messi…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zs2uLsN6Pno[/youtube]

8. Mixed Martial Arts: Strikeforce Challengers (Friday 11pm from Cedar Park, TX live on Showtime)

I got to see Strikeforce live for the first time this past Saturday night in New Jersey. With any luck, the smell will come out by  St. Patrick’s Day.

The bad news for Strikeforce is that Fedor Emelianenko-the only fighter Strikeforce had that non-MMA hardcores gave a rip about-was eliminated from their World Heavyweight Grand Prix Tournament.

The good news for Strikeforce is that on Saturday night they also officially announced the return of Gina Carano. I’d like to tell you that I think she’s a good fighter. The reality is that no one knows and even fewer care…

gina

For the record, I tried posting the “Gina Carano is back” video Strikeforce showed on Showtime Saturday night; but it wasn’t up on YouTube yet. It’s a lovely video. Trust me.

7. NHL: Washington Capitals @ Anaheim Ducks (Wednesday 10pm from Anaheim live on Comcast SportsNet), Washington Capitals @ San Jose Sharks (Thursday 10:30pm from San Jose live on Comcast SportsNet), Washington Capitals @ Buffalo Sabres (Sunday 12:30pm from Buffalo live on NBC), Washington Capitals @ Pittsburgh Penguins (Monday 7:30pm from Pittsburgh live on VERSUS)

I know that without Monday Night Football there might be a few more folks interested in checking out the Caps face the Pens in a Winter Classic rematch. I won’t be one of them. I hate the Redskins, I hate the Steelers. So I just don’t care for the hockey teams in those cities either.

BUT…if Penguins goalie Brent Johnson gets in another fight like the one he got into against the New York Islanders the other night…I’d be ALL IN…at least to watch the highlights on SportsCenter or something.

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J4FrNDkAYVY[/youtube]

6. Women’s College Basketball: Duke @ Maryland (Thursday 7:30pm Comcast Center), Maryland @ Florida State (Sunday 3pm from Tallahassee, FL live on ESPN2)

Can SOMEONE please manage to figure out a way to beat Duke?!? PLEASE?!?!?

I’ll be in College Park Thursday night to check out the Terrapins women as they do the Lord’s work against the Blue Devils.

Hopefully the spirit of Kristi Toliver will be alive as the Terps battle the Devils…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=H-iTj7K6tew[/youtube]

5. Pro Wrestling: WWE Elimination Chamber (Sunday 8pm from Oakland live on Pay-Per-View)

Yep, the Elimination Chamber is crazy. But I could show you a video of that or I could show you a picture of WWE Diva Kelly Kelly. I mean, what are we really doing here anyway???

kellykelly

4. College Lacrosse: Navy @ Loyola (Saturday 2pm from Ridley Athletic Complex live on AM1570 WNST); Johns Hopkins @ Towson (Saturday 12pm from Unitas Stadium live on ABC2 & ESPN3.com); Detroit @ Maryland (Saturday 1pm Byrd Stadium)

And with this, Lacrosse is now REALLY back in Charm City. Sadly, it will only kill a handful of Saturdays during MLB season for me, and there won’t be NEARLY enough weeknight games to avoid baseball altogether-but at least there’s an entertaining outdoor sport to watch.

This is also very awkward because I try to support all of the local teams, but they face off more in lacrosse than they do in any other sport.

So for this week I say “Let’s Go BlueTigerTerpHoundsmen!!!”

3. College Basketball: Maryland @ Virginia Tech (Tuesday 8pm from Blacksburg, VA live on ACC Network-WNUV 54 in Charm City), North Carolina State @ Maryland (Sunday 5:30pm from Comcast Center live on Comcast SportsNet); James Madison @ Towson (Tuesday 7pm Towson Center); UMES @ Morgan State (Monday 9pm from Hill Field House live on ESPNU); Rider @ Loyola (Wednesday 7pm Reitz Arena); Hartford @ UMBC (Saturday 7pm RAC Arena); UMES @ Coppin State (Saturday 4pm Coppin State Physical Education Complex), Delaware State @ Coppin State (Monday 7:30pm Coppin State Physical Education Complex); ESPNU Bracketbusters: VMI @ Morgan State (Saturday 4pm Hill Field House), Loyola @ Towson (Saturday 7pm Towson Center)

Things I feel better about than Maryland’s chances of making the NCAA Tournament:

-The American economy
-The Orioles getting Prince Fielder in the offseason
-Katy Perry finally saying “yes” to one of my date requests
-Seeing a new Chris Farley movie one of these days
-Steve Melewski buying me a beer when Drew Forrester and I do our show in Sarasota
-Duke football getting bowl eligible

I think you know where I’m going here.

But if they figure out a way to beat the Hokies Tuesday night…

2. NBA: All-Star Game (Sunday 8pm from Los Angeles live on TNT), All-Star Saturday Night (Saturday 8pm from Los Angeles live on TNT), T-Mobile Rookie Challenge (Friday 9pm from Los Angeles live on TNT); Washington Wizards @ Orlando Magic (Wednesday 7pm from Orlando live on Comcast SportsNet)

Nine out of ten NBA games are awful as it is, yet somehow the ASG finds a way to be even more awful than that.

I guess the dunk contest has occasionally been watchable…and is certainly the only reason any of us are familiar with names like Harold Miner or Gerald Green. And by “any of us” I mean “I went to Wikipedia and looked up to see who all won dunk contests in the past.”

Seriously, why the hell don’t they just put down trampolines and do the whole contest Slamball-style?!?!?

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WOKzUWguWik[/youtube]

1. Auto Racing: NASCAR-Gatorade Duels (Thursday 2pm from Daytona, FL live on SPEED), Daytona 500 (Sunday 1pm from Daytona, FL live on FOX)

I wish I cared about NASCAR this week. I know this is a big deal to a handful of folks…I just don’t care. At all.

I’ve tried watching races. I’ve tried going to races. I’ve tried hosting a NASCAR radio show with Donnie Neuenberger (seriously). I’ve tried starting at pictures of Danica Patrick.

None of it worked. I just don’t care. It’s cars racing.

It doesn’t mean any of these aren’t funny…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pwnO_CMY41k[/youtube]

Flexing my mic muscles since 1983…

-G

(Week of Tuesday, February 15-Monday February 21)

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