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Top 10 Baseball Distractions

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Top 10 Baseball Distractions

Posted on 12 June 2012 by Glenn Clark

Honorable Mention: WNBA-Indiana Fever @ Washington Mystics (Friday 7pm from Verizon Center live on Comcast SportsNet); Tennis: ATP Garry Weber Open (Tuesday-Saturday 1pm from Halle, GER on Tennis Channel)

10. Bonnie Raitt (Sunday 6pm Pier Six Pavilion); Beach Boys (Friday 6:30pm Merriweather Post Pavilion); Neil Diamond (Thursday 8pm Verizon Center); Dave Matthews Band/Gary Clark Jr. (Saturday 7pm Jiffy Lube Live); Martina McBride (Wednesday 8pm Wolf Trap); Reel Big Fish (Friday 8pm Power Plant Live); Of Montreal (Thursday 8pm Recher Theatre); Lindsey Buckingham (Thursday 9pm Baltimore Soundstage), Lisa Marie Presley (Friday 8:30pm Baltimore Soundstage); Kelly Bell Band/Cris Jacobs (Saturday 7pm 8×10 Club); Robert Cray Band (Thursday 8pm Rams Head on Stage); Grouplove (Wednesday 7pm 9:30 Club); The Cult (Tuesday 8pm Fillmore Silver Spring); Bouncing Souls (Tuesday 7:30pm Black Cat DC); Ziggy Marley (Wednesday 8pm Howard Theatre), Little Richard (Saturday 8pm Howard Theatre); Keane (Thursday 8pm Strathmore); Rush “Clockwork Angels” available in stores/on iTunes (Tuesday)

I’ve already established that “Wouldn’t It Be Nice” is the greatest Beach Boys song of all time. Now I point out that I’m an absolute hack because I also enjoy this clip from Full House…

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DOZ5dEiZYCo

A lot of people know I’m a significant Dave Matthews fan. But do you know that I’ve proclaimed my all time favorite Dave Matthews tune to be THIS?…

And if you go see DMB don’t stay in the parking lot too long. Gary Clark Jr. is freaking AMAZING. You may remember him from a collaboration he had with Ray Lewis a few weeks back at the NFL Draft…

Wait…The Cult? Isn’t that the band that does the song from that commercial in that Super Bowl?

9. Star-Spangled Sailabration (Wednesday-Monday Inner Harbor, Fells Point, Locust Point); Rock of Ages” and “That’s My Boy” out in theaters (Friday); Gilbert Gottfried (Saturday Magooby’s Joke House); Richard Lewis (Thursday-Saturday Baltimore Comedy Factory); Gary Valentine (Thursday-Saturday DC Improv)

Ryan Chell and I are going to see That’s My Boy Tuesday night. It will probably make six billion dollars and everyone involved will get new cars. It used to piss me off because I don’t really find Adam Sandler’s shtick to be funny anymore, but there are a couple issues involved. One-Adam Sandler sat down with us at the Super Bowl and was really nice. He even opened up about my idol Chris Farley, which is something I found out later he really never does…

Two-over the past few months I’ve developed a unique friendship with Happy Madison star Peter Dante, who might be the best human being on the face of the planet. He’s the guy on the right below…

So now I hope the movie is funny and they make a billion dollars. Damn you, nice guys.

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Top 10 Baseball Distractions

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Top 10 Baseball Distractions

Posted on 05 June 2012 by Glenn Clark

Honorable Mention: Golf-PGA Tour FedEx St. Jude Classic (Thursday & Friday 3pm live on Golf Channel Saturday & Sunday 3pm live on CBS. All golf from Memphis), Champions Tour Regions Tradition (Thursday & Friday 6:30pm Saturday & Sunday 7:30pm from Shoal Creek, AL on Golf Channel), Wegmans LPGA Championship (Thursday & Friday 12pm Saturday & Sunday 2pm from Pittsford, NY live on Golf Channel); WNBA: New York Liberty @ Washington Mystics (Friday 7pm from Verizon Center live on Comcast SportsNet); Mixed Martial Arts: UFC on FX 3-Demetrious Johnson vs. Ian McCall (Friday 9pm from Sunrise, FL live on FX); Pro Lacrosse: MLL Charlotte Hounds @ Chesapeake Bayhawks (Saturday 7pm from Navy-Marine Corps Memorial Stadium live on Comcast SportsNet/ESPN3.com)

10. Gavin DeGraw & Colbie Caillat (Sunday 6pm Pier Six Pavilion); Foster The People (Sunday 5:30pm Merriweather Post Pavilion); Carbon Leaf/Civil Twilight (Saturday 7pm Rams Head Live); Hawthorne Heights (Sunday 5pm Recher Theatre); Victor Wooten (Tuesday 8pm Rams Head on Stage), Edwin McCain (Thursday 8pm Rams Head on Stage), Little River Band (Sunday 1pm Rams Head on Stage), Marshall Tucker Band (Sunday 8pm Rams Head on Stage), Bootsy Collins (Monday 8pm Rams Head on Stage); Jimmy Cliff (Thursday 7pm 9:30 Club); The Wailers (Tuesday 8pm Howard Theatre); Beach Boys “That’s Why God Made The Radio” available in stores/on iTunes (Tuesday)

There was a time in my life when I genuinely enjoyed the tunes of Gavin DeGraw. Maybe that’s not something I should be broadcasting…

Since Foster The People are coming to town and the Beach Boys are putting out a new record, here’s FTP’s EXCELLENT take on the greatest Beach Boys tune of all time…

Any excuse to share a Carbon Leaf tune is a good one…

I wish I could go to RHL Saturday night. Civil Twilight is excellent too…

9. “Prometheus” opens in theaters (Friday); Safe House“, “John Carter” and “Act of Valor” available on Blu-Ray/DVD (Tuesday); Greg Proops (Thursday-Sunday DC Improv); Doug Benson (Saturday Baltimore Comedy Factory); Honfest (Saturday & Sunday Hampden); Maryland Wine Week begins (Friday)

You know Prometheus as THAT MOVIE EVERYONE IN THE WORLD WANTS TO SEE. Well, at least until “Abraham Lincoln Vampire Hunter” comes out, at which point they might as well just stop making movies.

Honestly, there is no single greater gift you could ever purchase me than this movie poster…

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The 2011 Van Clarkenburg Awards

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The 2011 Van Clarkenburg Awards

Posted on 29 December 2011 by Glenn Clark

The Baltimore Sun’s Kevin Van Valkenburg joined me in studio Wednesday on “The Reality Check” on AM1570 WNST.net. We held a very special year-end awards show that we cleverly titled “The Van Clarkenburgs.” Here is a rundown of our winners…

LOCAL SPORTS:

“Best” Orioles-

Glenn Clark: O’s decision to bring Zach Britton up with team from Spring Training
Kevin Van Valkenburg: Britton’s May 18 start vs. New York Yankees

“Worst” Orioles-

Glenn: Birds’ decision to demote Britton midway through season
Kevin: Mike Flanagan suicide death

“Best” Ravens-

Glenn: Terrell Suggs
Kevin: Drafting Torrey Smith

“Worst” Ravens-

Glenn: Trading for Lee Evans instead of signing free agent Malcom Floyd
Kevin: 12-7 loss to Jacksonville Jaguars October 24

“Best Other Local Sports”-

Glenn: Towson University Football
Kevin: Graham Motion trained Animal Kingdom wins Kentucky Derby

“Worst Other Local Sports”-

Glenn: Randy Edsall’s first season in College Park
Kevin: Kevin Anderson’s handling of Mike Leach, Sean Miller

NATIONAL SPORTS:

What topic deserved more conversation in 2011?

Glenn: Novak Djokovic’s incredible season
Kevin: Ugly nature of NCAA/College Sports

What topic received too much conversation?

Glenn: Tim Tebow
Kevin: LeBron James

Who did the best coaching job in 2011?

Glenn: Joe Maddon
Kevin: Rick Carlisle

Who did the worst coaching job in 2011?

Glenn: Norv Turner
Kevin: Norv Turner

What was the best game you attended in 2011?

Glenn: Maryland’s 4-3 2OT soccer win at UMBC
Kevin: Baltimore Ravens’ 23-20 win over Pittsburgh Steelers at Heinz Field

What was the best game you watched on TV in 2011?

Glenn: World Series Game 6 St. Louis Cardinals/Texas Rangers
Kevin: Women’s World Cup Quarterfinal Team USA/Brazil

What about sports were we “better off” for in 2011?

Glenn: NBA starting on Christmas Day
Kevin: Appreciation of Women’s World Cup

What sports media type do you love but hate to follow on Twitter?

Glenn: Gregg Doyel (CBSSports.com)
Kevin: Darren Rovell (CNBC)

(Continued on Page 2)

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Top 10 Baseball Distractions

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Top 10 Baseball Distractions

Posted on 18 October 2011 by Glenn Clark

Honorable Mention: Boxing-Nonito Donaire vs. Omar Narvaez (Saturday 10:30pm from New York live on HBO); Soccer: MLS-Portland Timbers @ DC United (Wednesday 8pm from RFK Stadium live on Comcast SportsNet), Sporting Kansas City @ DC United (Saturday 7:30pm from RFK Stadium live on Comcast SportsNet PLUS); College Soccer: Penn State @ UMBC (Wednesday 7pm Retriever Soccer Park); Mixed Martial Arts: Bellator Fighting Championships 55 (Saturday 9pm from Yuma, AZ live on MTV2); High School Football: Perry Hall @ Woodlawn (Friday 7pm), Dunbar @ Poly (7pm), Archbishop Spalding @ Calvert Hall (7pm); Rugby World Cup Bronze Medal Match: Wales vs. Australia (Friday 3:30am from Auckland, New Zealand live on Universal Sports), Final: France vs. New Zealand (Sunday 3pm from Auckland, New Zealand on NBC); Canadian Football League: Montreal Alouettes @ Winnipeg Blue Bombers (Saturday 3pm from Winnipeg live on NFL Network)

10. Dirty Heads/Gym Class Heroes (Tuesday 7pm Rams Head Live), Jayhawks (Thursday 7pm Rams Head Live), Ani Difranco (Saturday 7pm Rams Head Live), New Found Glory (Sunday 5:30pm Rams Head Live), Mat Kearney (Monday 7pm Rams Head Live); Mike Posner (Thursday 7pm Recher Theatre); J Cole (Thursday 7pm Baltimore Soundstage); Blind Boys of Alabama (Tuesday 8pm Rams Head on Stage), Stephen Stills (Wednesday 8pm Rams Head on Stage), Dick Dale (Saturday 12:30pm Rams Head on Stage), Little River Band (Monday 8pm Rams Head on Stage); Jason Isbell (Friday 10pm 9:30 Club), Taking Back Sunday (Saturday 11pm 9:30 Club); Wale (Saturday 7pm Fillmore Silver Spring); “Weird Al” Yankovic (Wednesday 8pm Warner Theatre), Jackson Browne (Sunday 7pm Warner Theatre); India.Arie (Saturday 8pm Strathmore); Martina McBride (Sunday 7pm France-Merrick Performing Arts Center at the Hippodrome); Coldplay “Mylo Xyloto, Jane’s Addiction “The Great Escape Artist” available on iTunes/in stores (Tuesday); Pearl Jam 20 available on DVD (Tuesday)

I’ve had my ass kicked a bit over not being more familiar with the Jayhawks until recently. They’re quite good…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KBGX_z6xuVU[/youtube]

The name Dick Dale might not mean a lot to you, but if you listen to “The Reality Check” on AM1570 WNST.net (and why wouldn’t you?), you’d be familiar with the theme to “Totally Tubular.” (Someone will yell at me for not also noting that Dick Dale is one of the greatest surf guitarists of all time. I’ve handled that now.)…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D5OHrQYwRac[/youtube]

The Sun’s Kevin Van Valkenburg introduced me to Jason Isbell (of Drive-By Truckers fame) perhaps without even realizing he had. I’m thankful.

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4V_vBPaI1d0[/youtube]

I’d love to be like the rest of the world and just make fun of Coldplay, but DAMN they make good music…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1Kf_6BWcOOg[/youtube]

9. Brad Garrett (Thursday 6pm & 9pm Rams Head on Stage); Lewis Black (Saturday 8pm Lyric Opera House Sunday 8pm Fillmore Silver Spring); Paul Mooney (Thursday-Saturday Baltimore Comedy Factory); Dave Attell (Thursday-Sunday DC Improv); Pirates of the Caribbean: On Stranger Tide” and “Bad Teacher” available on DVD/Blu-Ray (Tuesday); Maryland Renaissance Festival final weekend (Saturday & Sunday RennFest Fairgrounds Crownsville)

There are few people in the world that GENUINELY make me laugh. Lewis Black is one of those people. (Language NSFW…unless you work in Lewis Black’s office of course.)

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4mCDZMWVWuc[/youtube]

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Top 10 Baseball Distractions

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Top 10 Baseball Distractions

Posted on 27 September 2011 by Glenn Clark

Honorable Mention: Golf: PGA Tour Justin Timberlake Shriners Hospital for Children Open (Thursday-Sunday 4pm from Las Vegas live on Golf Channel), Champions Tour SAS Championship (Friday-Sunday 7:30pm from Cary, NC on Golf Channel); Preseason NHL: Buffalo Sabres @ Washington Capitals (Friday 7pm Verizon Center), Chicago Blackhawks @ Washington Capitals (Sunday 5pm from Verizon Center live on NHL Network); Canadian Football League: Edmonton Eskimos @ BC Lions (Friday 10:30pm from Vancouver live on NFL Network), Saskatchewan Roughriders @ Calgary Stampeders (Saturday 4pm from Calgary live on NFL Network); WNBA: Eastern Conference Finals Game 3-Atlanta Dream @ Indiana Fever (Tuesday 8pm from Indianapolis live on ESPN2), WNBA Finals: Atlanta/Indiana @ Minnesota (Sunday 8:30pm from Minneapolis live on ESPN); High School Football: Perry Hall @ Kenwood (Friday 7pm), Southern @ Glen Burnie (Friday 6:30pm)

10. Chris Brown (Wednesday 7pm 1st Mariner Arena); Enrique Iglesias/Pitbull (Tuesday 7pm Patriot Center); Ray LaMontagne & The Pariah Dogs (Thursday 5:30pm Merriweather Post Pavilion); Stephen Malkmus and The Jicks (Thursday 7pm Rams Head Live); Psychadelic Furs/Tom Tom Club (Thursday 7:30pm Baltimore Soundstage); Phil Vassar (Thursday 6pm & 9pm Rams Head On Stage); Matt Nathanson/Vanessa Carlton (Tuesday/Wednesday 7pm 9:30 Club), The Bridge (Friday 8pm 9:30 Club); George Thorogood & The Destroyers (Sunday 7pm Fillmore Silver Spring); Elvis Costello & The Imposters (Thursday 8pm Warner Theatre), Joe Rogan (Friday 8pm Warner Theatre); Lindsey Buckingham (Friday 8pm Kraushaar Auditorium Goucher College); Bobcat Goldthwait (Thursday-Saturday Baltimore Comedy Factory); Switchfoot “Vice Verses” available in stores/on iTunes (Tuesday)

Wanna impress your old lady? Ray LaMontagne is probably the thing to do the trick…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vJ3xTjvj9tw[/youtube]

I REALLY shouldn’t admit to how much I enjoy this new Matt Nathanson tune…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QPuqA94-qCo[/youtube]

I hope that instead of Lindsey Buckingham actually PLAYING Goucher Saturday night, he’s instead pre-empted by DeAndre Cole…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ELag3LFbVIc[/youtube]

If you’ve listened to “The Reality Check” on AM1570 WNST.net (and why in the HELL wouldn’t you?), you’ve heard me play the hell out of “Dark Horses” from the new Switchfoot disc. It’s a GREAT football tune…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iiNmS-ix43M[/youtube]

9. Fells Point Fun Festival (Saturday & Sunday Fells Point); “Transformers: Dark of the Moon” available on DVD/Blu-Ray (Friday); “50/50″ opens in theaters (Friday); Maryland Renaissance Festival (Saturday & Sunday RennFest Fairgrounds Crownsville); Second City: Charmed & Dangerous (Tuesday-Saturday Center Stage)

The thing about Dark of the Moon is that it wasn’t great, but it WAS a chance for us to see Rosie Huntington-Whiteley’s ass in the opening scenes. That’s pleasant…

rhw

And while we’re here, I’m buying in on 50/50. I think it looks like a winner in general. And I tend to be a fan of Seth Rogen’s work…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KhwXYqt-4k8[/youtube]

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Top 10 Baseball Distractions

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Top 10 Baseball Distractions

Posted on 18 July 2011 by Glenn Clark

Honorable Mention: Mixed Martial Arts: Strikeforce Challengers-Bobby Voelker vs. Roger Bowling (Friday 11pm from Las Vegas live on Showtime); WNBA: Atlanta Dream @ Washington Mystics (Wednesday 11:30am from Verizon Center live on NBA TV); Arena Football: AFL Spokane Shock @ Jacksonville Sharks (Friday 8pm from Jacksonville live on NFL Network); CFL: Edmonton Eskimos @ Calgary Stampeders (Saturday 7pm from Calgary live on NFL Network); Boxing: Friday Night Fights-Anthony Dirrell vs. Kevin Engel (Friday 9pm from Las Vegas live on ESPN2), Amir Khan vs. Zab Judah (Saturday 10pm from Las Vegas live on HBO); Roller Derby: Charm City Roller Girls (Saturday 5:30pm Du Burns Arena); Pro Lacrosse: MLL Long Island Lizards @ Chesapeake Bayhawks (Saturday 7pm from Navy-Marine Corps Memorial Stadium live on Comcast SportsNet/ESPN3.com)

10. Michael McDonald & Boz Scaggs (Tuesday 6:30pm Pier Six Pavilion), Dierks Bentley (Thursday 6pm Pier Six Pavilion); Wiz Khalifa (Sunday 3:30pm Merriweather Post Pavilion); Lucinda Williams/Amos Lee (Tuesday 8pm Wolf Trap), Emmylou Harris (Saturday 8pm Wolf Trap); Kid Cudi (Saturday 7pm Ocean City Inlet); Ted Nugent (Saturday 7pm Rams Head Live); Better Than Ezra (Friday 6pm Power Plant Live); Jimi Haha (Saturday 8pm Recher Theatre); Marc Cohn (Saturday 9pm Rams Head On Stage); Ellie Goulding (Monday 7pm 9:30 Club); Jonny Lang (Tuesday 7:30pm Birchmere), Carbon Leaf (Friday 7:30pm Birchmere); Brian McKnight (Friday 8pm Strathmore); Tom Papa (Thursday-Saturday DC Improv); 311 “Universal Pulse” available in stores/on iTunes (Tuesday)

I don’t care what Paul Rudd said in “40 Year Old Virgin”, Michael McDonald kicks ass. (Note: Michael McDonald doesn’t really kick ass. But “What a Fool Believes” does.)

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CDWGKQcQ8zw[/youtube]

It’s much too far a haul, but I’d be all in to go see Amos Lee…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qDOcbMic6mI[/youtube]

Can anyone help me find an affordable place to stay in OC this weekend? I’d REALLY like to go see Kid Cudi…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qRPpLGxGNZY[/youtube]

If I don’t go to OC this weekend, I’m definitely going to see BTE Friday night. This song was the soundtrack to my 7th grade…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Gl6gaF_6Wcs[/youtube]

9. Captain America” and “Friends With Benefits” open in theaters (Friday)

I’m all in on Captain America because…I mean…he’s Captain freaking America.

You might be surprised that I’m also in on FWB, but I am. Think about it. One-it’s a movie about Mila Kunis having sex…

kunis

Two-Justin Timberlake is legit funny…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dOulenjUr5E[/youtube]

(Eds. Note: Why would SNL try so hard to ruin him by shoving Kristen Wiig and Lady GaGa in this sketch?)

(Eds. Note 2: No way Friends With Benefits is REALLY funny.)

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Am I wrong to not cry over U.S. Soccer women’s loss to Japan?

Posted on 18 July 2011 by Nestor Aparicio

Well, it took me about 5 minutes but I got over the loss of the U.S. Soccer women’s team on Sunday afternoon live from Frankfurt, Germany. It sucked. They shoulda, coulda, woulda won — but in the end, it was a biblical choke by our ladies in a heartbreaking penalty kick loss to Japan.

Honestly, it was the kind of choke that if the men’s team pulled in the same fashion in the waning moments of the World Cup final that it would’ve been a devastating loss for the ages. It would’ve been the biggest patriotic disaster in the history of modern sports, really. And that’s considering that almost no one in this country pays attention to the U.S. Men’s Soccer team, either, which is probably considered our biggest national mystery to anyone who has ever been outside of America to feel the passion the rest of the world has for “the beautiful game.”

I opined moments after the loss on Facebook and Twitter that had this really have been the men’s final vs. Japan, I might’ve been suicidal at the notion of that kind of loss. Or at the very least truly heartbroken and devastated for days/weeks/months/forever- – ya know, like when the Ravens lose to the Colts or Steelers every year.

That’s REAL pain. This U.S. women’s soccer pain is almost imaginary. I’ve gotten mosquito bites where the pain has hurt more and lingered far longer. That’s not disrespect for women’s soccer. Quite the contrary- – it’s just the reality of the lack of our national passion for soccer in general and women’s sports in particular.

Women’s soccer was last significant in my life in 1999 when Brandi Chastain disrobed and I watched it then and enjoyed it as much as I did yesterday. These finals are smartly plotted for the “dead” time of the sports calendar in July, made even worse if you live in Baltimore and are a baseball fan. There was very little choice yesterday between watching the U.S.A.-Japan World Cup championship game vs. another Orioles slapdick starter giving up three runs in the first inning and chasing me to the soccer game by 2 p.m.

While I’m on the topic of women’s soccer and its lack of national significance, let me also say that it was a pleasure to watch the game of soccer played by clean athletes who weren’t diving all over the field like a bunch of pussies. I’m sick of watching the men’s game become a flop fest and a faux stretcher convention. It’s an insult to the fans, the game and themselves but in many countries and cultures around the world this is considered shrewd gamesmanship and cheating and lying are not considered “taboo” the way they are in our culture.

So, kudos to both teams for playing hard, well-executed, spirited soccer and giving us all a thrill for a few hours and days. And I hope that Abby Wambach and company regroup and come back in four years and continue to the grow the game and sport of soccer in America.

But somehow, I feel kinda bad that I don’t feel worse than I do – especially given the way they lost the game.

But I don’t.

And there’s also a little side of me that’s happy for those ladies from Japan, who showed some true “American” values in never quitting, always trying hard and never believing what the critics have to say. And the U.S. ladies were especially respectful and dignified in defeat. I think I see more tears when men lose games than the ladies.

And as nice of a “feel good” story it is for the rising star given the tsunami disaster and the subsequent fallout, I have a feeling most people in Japan weren’t even aware they were playing women’s soccer yesterday in Germany.

Someday the women’s games might overtake the consciousness of the public but we’re not there yet.

Yesterday’s loss hurt — and it will always be memorable — but no one in America is carrying it around today the way Baltimore carries around a Ravens’ loss in January.

It’s kind of odd the way we get our hearts involved in sports, don’t you think?

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Top 10 Baseball Distractions

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Top 10 Baseball Distractions

Posted on 11 July 2011 by Glenn Clark

Honorable Mention: Boxing-Diego Magdaleno vs. Alejandro Perez (Friday 11:05pm from Las Vegas live on Showtime), Friday Night Fights-Pawel Wolak vs. Delvin Rodriguez (Friday 9pm from New York live on ESPN2); WNBA: Washington Mystics @ Seattle Storm (Tuesday 3pm from Seattle live on NBA TV), Washington Mystics @ Los Angeles Sparks (Sunday 8:30pm from LA live on NBA TV); Arena Football-AFL Pittsburgh Power @ Cleveland Gladiators (Friday 8pm from Cleveland live on NFL Network); Canadian Football League: Saskatchewan Roughriders @ Hamilton Tiger-Cats (Saturday 4pm from Hamilton, ONT live on NFL Network), British Columbia Lions @ Edmonton Eskimos (Saturday 7pm from Edmonton live on NFL Network), Calgary Stampeders @ Winnipeg Blue Bombers (Thursday 8pm from Winnipeg live on ESPN3.com), Toronto Argonauts @ Montreal Alouettes (Saturday 7:30pm from Montreal live on ESPN3.com); Tennis: WTT New York Sportimes @ Washington Kastles (Tuesday 7pm from Kastles Stadium live on Comcast SportsNet), Springfield Lasers @ Washington Kastles (Thursday 7pm from Kastles Stadium live on Comcast SportsNet/Tennis Channel), St. Louis Aces @ Washington Kastles (Friday 7pm Kastles Stadium), Sacramento Capitals @ Washington Kastles (Monday 7pm Kastles Stadium)

10. Pat Benatar/Neil Giraldo/Dennis DeYoung (Friday 6pm Pier Six Pavilion), Peter Frampton (Sunday 5:30pm Pier Six Pavilion); Miranda Lambert (Friday 6:30pm Merriweather Post Pavilion); Lil’ Wayne (Saturday 7pm Jiffy Lube Live); Huey Lewis & The News (Wednesday 8pm Wolf Trap); Mr. Greengenes (Friday 7pm Power Plant Live); Soundgarden (Tuesday 7:30pm Patriot Center); Jonny Lang (Thursday 7pm Rams Head Live), Taking Back Sunday (Saturday 6pm Rams Head Live); Jimi Haha (Saturday 8pm Recher Theatre); Tim Meadows (Friday 6:30pm & 9:30pm Rams Head On Stage), Cracker (Sunday 8pm Rams Head On Stage); Interpol (Wednesday 7pm 9:30 Club), Stephen Marley (Thursday 7pm 9:30 Club), Marc Broussard (Friday 8pm 9:30 Club); Edwin McCain (Thursday 7:30pm Birchmere); k.d. lang (Thursday 8pm Meyerhoff Symphony Hall); A Perfect Circle (Sunday 8pm D.A.R. Constitution Hall); Harry Potter and the Deathly Hollows Part 2 out in theaters (Friday)

I certainly wouldn’t pay to do it, but there’s at least a chance I’ll sit across the Pier Friday night for Dennis DeYoung. Do you have any idea how many times I’ve watched Styx: Behind The Music?

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zJJcR1r7u2A&feature=fvst[/youtube]

I was sitting around cracking crabs Sunday when a Lil’ Wayne tune came on Pandora. I was reminded of how much Mr. Weezy can make things…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CHZtMNbrmWE[/youtube]

I’m HONESTLY debating getting in the car Tuesday night, driving the two hours or so to Fairfax (might be more like 3 given traffic) and taking in the iconic pipes of Chris Cornell. Dude is an icon…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T0_zzCLLRvE[/youtube]

If you’ve never heard Jimi Haha outside of Jimmie’s Chicken Shack, I’d imagine you’d be quite pleasantly surprised…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5i05XEAN9Lg[/youtube]

9. Poker-World Series of Poker (Thursday & Friday 3pm 7pm 11pm live on ESPN3.com 11pm live on ESPN2, Saturday 3:30pm live on ESPN2/ESPN3.com, Sunday 12am 3pm 10pm live on ESPN3.com 12am 10pm live on ESPN2, Monday 7pm live on ESPN2/ESPN3.com. All poker from Las Vegas)

Remember when ESPN attempted to convince us that everyone in the world would be watching/playing/caring about/paying attention to poker a few years ago?

Umm….how’d that work out?

Despite the fact that no one seems to care anymore, they’re going to provide their lengthiest/most in-depth coverage of the event ever this year. That’s good news, as I was struggling to answer the question “what am I going to not watch on TV this week?” with something besides NASCAR or golf.

Want me to watch? Try “World Series of Strip Poker” with Lais Ribeiro (thanks Guyism). I won’t guarantee I’ll watch, but I’m much more likely…

lais

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Top 10 Baseball Distractions

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Top 10 Baseball Distractions

Posted on 04 July 2011 by Glenn Clark

Honorable Mention: Arena Football-AFL Cleveland Gladiators @ Philadelphia Soul (Friday 8pm from Philly live on NFL Network); Canadian Football League: Montreal Alouettes @ Saskatchewan Roughriders (Saturday 4pm from Saskatchewan live on NFL Network), Hamilton Tiger-Cats @ Edmonton Eskimos (Saturday 7pm from Edmonton live on NFL Network); WNBA: Washington Mystics @ Chicago Sky (Tuesday 8pm from Chicago live on ESPN3.com); Boxing: Brandon Rios vs. Urbano Antillon (Saturday 10pm from Carson, CA live on Showtime), Paul Williams vs. Erislandy Lara (Saturday 10:15pm from Atlantic City live on HBO), Friday Night Fights-Francisco Sierra vs. Jesus Gonzales (Friday 9pm from Phoenix live on ESPN2)

10. Bela Fleck & The Flecktones (Thursday 6pm Rams Head Live), Charm City Devils (Saturday 7:30pm Rams Head Live), Old 97′s (Monday 7pm Rams Head Live); Frankie Beverly & MAZE (Saturday 6pm Pier Six Pavilion); Animal Collective (Saturday 6:30pm Merriweather Post Pavilion); Def Leppard/Heart (Saturday 7:30pm Jiffy Lube Live); Marshall Tucker Band (Sunday 8pm Rams Head On Stage); John Witherspoon (Thursday-Sunday DC Improv); Rockapella (Thursday 7:30pm Meyerhoff Symphony Hall); The Bridge (Sunday 6pm Ladew Gardens)

The Old 97′s are the best band you’ve never heard of. (I’ve always wanted to say that!)

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-1nn7lXP7WQ[/youtube]

I’ve been trying to get you to support John Allan and CCD boys for years. Please start soon.

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cUB08-RuwdM[/youtube]

My favorite Def Leppard tune? Quite possibly “Photograph”…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VZ5bS3_BCDs[/youtube]

For the 15th time this year, PLEASE START LISTENING TO THE BRIDGE…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ajY3mBuGVQk[/youtube]

9. “Horrible Bosses” opens in theaters (Friday); Boy Meets World Season 6 available on DVD (Tuesday)

I finally saw “Bridesmaids” over 4th of July weekend. How can Kristen Wiig not be funny at all on Saturday Night Live but then be genuinely funny in a really funny movie? Weird.

Critics are telling us Horrible Bosses is really funny, so I imagine I’ll see it. I am struggling with one of the plotlines being Charlie Day having problems with being sexually harassed by Jennifer Aniston however…

aniston

Nope. Not buying it.

And as far as BMW Season 6 goes, I remember the ridiculous range of emotions I experienced while watching the episode “Resurrection.” Tough to do this to a 13 year old kid, ABC.

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wIv8WCIfD4Y[/youtube]

8. Pro Lacrosse: MLL All-Star Game (Saturday 7pm from Boston live on ESPN2)

Lord…they’ve won the Super Bowl three times, the World Series twice, the NBA Championship, the Stanley Cup and four Frozen Fours since 2001 and now they’re taking the All-Star Game in OUR sport?

Jesus, this is too much. Seriously, can’t we just have anything in Charm City? I mean, are they going to take this from us next???

backriver

7. Cycling: Tour De France (Stage 3 Tuesday 8am Stage 4 Wednesday 7:30am Stages 5-8 Thursday-Sunday 8am all live on VERSUS)

I couldn’t tell you a damn THING about the Tour de France at this point, and I follow Lance Armstrong on Twitter.

Instead, I offer a picture of Buffalo Chicken Waffle French Fries for my food porn friends…

fries

Word.

6. Auto Racing: NASCAR Quaker State 400 (Saturday 7:30pm from Sparta, KY live on TNT); IndyCar Series Honda Indy Toronto (Sunday 2pm from Toronto live on VERSUS)

Something called David Ragan won this week’s NASCAR race in Daytona. So…that happened.

Look-if it had been Brian Regan, I would have been interested…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=89frRi8GgGA[/youtube]

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Top 10 Baseball Distractions

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Top 10 Baseball Distractions

Posted on 27 June 2011 by Glenn Clark

Honorable Mention: WNBA-Seattle Storm @ Washington Mystics (Sunday 4pm from Verizon Center live on Comcast SportsNet); Arena Football: AFL Pittsburgh Power @ Orlando Predators (Friday 8pm from Orlando live on NFL Network); Canadian Football League: British Columbia Lions @ Montreal Alouettes (Thursday 7:30pm from Montreal live on NFL Network), Toronto Argonauts @ Calgary Stampeders (Saturday 8pm from Calgary live on NFL Network); NBA Collective Bargaining Agreement Expires (Friday); Cycling-Tour De France (Stage 1 Saturday Stage 2 Sunday Stage 3 Monday 8am live on VERSUS)

10. R. Kelly (Friday 8pm 1st Mariner Arena/Saturday 8pm Verizon Center); Trace Adkins (Friday 6:30pm Pier Six Pavilion); Kid Cudi (Saturday 6:30pm Merriweather Post Pavilion); Red/Red Jumpsuit Apparatus (Wednesday 6:30pm Rams Head Live); Todd Rundgren (Wednesday 8pm Rams Head On Stage); Matt and Kim (Tuesday 7pm 9:30 Club); “A Capitol Fourth” feat. Little Richard (Monday 8pm from the U.S. Capitol live on PBS); Uncle Sam Jam feat. Pat McGee Band & Blind Melon (Saturday 2pm National Harbor); Wale (Saturday 10pm Unitas Stadium), Transformers: Dark of the Moon (Wednesday) and Larry Crowne (Friday) open in theaters

You can make fun of me all you want. If you don’t dig “Honky Tonk Badonkadonk” you and I are simply going to have to agree to disagree…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vNVguvNE7qc[/youtube]

I really feel like I should dig Kid Cudi much more than I do. All told, he’s okay…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Xt22KvnRSL4[/youtube]

I’ve actually seen Little Richard play once before…it was right after Maryland pasted Tennessee in the 2002 Peach Bowl. He played in the middle of downtown Atlanta, as they dropped a huge peach behind him. It kicked ass…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kZ6h0kyqSRk[/youtube]

I don’t know how many more praises I can sing for Wale. Dude is incredible, even if he is an effing Redskins fan…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6zZqtYXDeh8[/youtube]

9. 4th of July Fireworks (Monday 9:30pm Inner Harbor); 4th of July parades/fireworks throughout Baltimore County (Saturday-Monday)

I’m partial myself to the Kingsville 4th of July parade having grown up on Bradshaw Road. As a youngster, it was nice to have something to do in town on Independence Day. Or at least a refreshing change of pace from what there was to do every other day in Kingsville…

nothing

So how did we get in so much trouble????

8. Boxing: IBF/WBO/WBA Heavyweight Championship Unification-Wladimir Klitschko vs. David Haye (Saturday 4:45pm from Hamburg, GER live on HBO), Friday Night Fights-Mark Melligen vs. Sebastian Lujan (Friday 11pm from San Antonio, TX live on ESPN2)

If a heavyweight title fight is held and no one pays attention, did it really happen?

This isn’t just a “everyone has a piece of the title so we’ll fight for a tenth of it” title fight, either. This is a legitimate “heavyweight championship of the world” title fight.

And yet…crickets.

Look, if Wladimir Klitschko wants people to pay attention to his next fight, I suggest he make it a “foxy boxing” contest against Jarah Marino (Thanks Guyism)…

jarah

Hey man…I know what I have to do to get page views, Wlad might have to do the same…

7. Auto Racing: NASCAR Coke Zero 400 (Saturday 7:30pm from Daytona, FL live on TNT)

I was in Charles Town, West Virginia Saturday night playing the ponies to celebrate a friend’s birthday. In the 5th race, the Number 5 horse literally through its’ jockey off not even a furlong in-only to go on to “win” the race by a nose. (Without the rider the win of course did not count.)

A young man standing near the rail near our party (who I’m reasonably certain was from WV) exclaimed “I ain’t never seen the #48 car do that!

So that’s what I’ve got from the world of NASCAR this week. Oh-apparently Kurt Busch won this week’s NASCAR race. And I saw Cars 2 Friday night! While I was sitting in the theater waiting for the flick to start, I Tweeted the following (follow me on Twitter @GlennClarkWNST)…

“Out to see #Cars2 tonight. #Thingsa27yearoldwithoutkidsshouldneverTweet”

So…yep…that’s all I’ve got for NASCAR. Honestly though, what did you expect?

6. Golf: PGA Tour AT&T National (Thursday & Friday 3pm live on Golf Channel, Saturday & Sunday 3pm live on CBS. All golf from Newton Square, PA); Champions Tour Principal Charity Classic (Friday 6:30pm Saturday & Sunday 7:30pm from West Des Moines, IA live on Golf Channel)

The National used to be an event that folks cared about because it was hosted by Tiger Woods. That was of course before Tiger Woods retired from competitive golf without having the decency to hold as much as a press conference to announce his decision.

Without Tiger, Drew Forrester will once again be the only person who cares even a little bit about the event. But since it’s near Philadelphia, it’s a great excuse to pass along this snippet of food porn…

patssteak

Look man…I’m no golf fan…but if watching a couple holes earned me a trip to Pat’s…I might be in.

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