Top 10 Baseball Distractions

August 08, 2011 | Glenn Clark

8. Arena Football: AFL ArenaBowl XXIV-Georgia Force/Jacksonville Sharks @ Arizona Rattlers (Friday 8:30pm from Phoenix live on NFL Network)

As the former sideline reporter for the Arizona Rattlers, I’m openly rooting for Kevin Guy’s gang to claim another ArenaBowl.

I know no one else in Charm City gives a crap about the Rattlers, but perhaps you would feel differently if you knew the Rattlers’ mascot was a live buffalo named Harvey Wallbanger that came onfield after every touchdown…


Still don’t care? That’s Harvey EFFING Wallbanger, man! Damn…

7. Auto Racing: NASCAR Heluva Good! Sour Cream Dips at The Glen (Sunday 1pm from Watkins Glen, NY live on ESPN); IndyCar Series Indy 225 (Sunday 3:30pm from Loudon, NH live on ABC)

The trip to Watkins Glen this weekend is interesting because it’s a “road race.”

Oh, did I say “interesting”? My fault. I meant the trip to Watkins Glen is “HAPPENING”.

My fault. That happens all the time.

In other news, here’s Elle Liberachi. She has nothing to do with Auto Racing that I know of, but she took many of her clothes off before posing for Guyism. That IS “interesting”.


6. Tennis: ATP Tour & WTA Tour Rogers Cup (Tuesday & Wednesday 1pm live on ESPN2, Thursday 12pm Friday 12pm & 7pm Saturday 1pm 3pm 8pm Sunday 1pm live on ESPN2. All tennis from Montreal & Toronto)

As is tradition in Canada, all players will dip themselves in pudding before playing in the Rogers Cup.

In related tennis news, Andy Roddick recently took his shirt off (why wouldn’t he?) for a Lacoste ad…


I don’t know how to quit you.

5. Mixed Martial Arts: UFC Live 5 (Sunday 8pm from Milwaukee live on VERSUS)

Attention aspiring MMA fighters: Do NOT dress like Dennis Hallman did for UFC 133…EVER. EVER.


If you do, you deserve to have a fighter like Brian Ebersole do THIS to you…