Top 10 Baseball Distractions

November 30, 2009 | Glenn Clark

Honorable Mention: NBA-Wizards @ Raptors (Tuesday 7pm from Toronto live on Comcast SportsNet), Bucks @ Wizards (Wednesday 7pm from Verizon Center live on Comcast SportsNet), Raptors @ Wizards (Friday 7pm from Verizon Center live on Comcast SportsNet), Wizards @ Pistons (Sunday 6pm from Detroit live on Comcast SportsNet & NBA TV); Boxing: Bernard Hopkins vs. Enrique Ornelas (Wednesday 8pm from Liacouras Center in Philadelphia live on VERSUS), Roy Jones Jr. vs. Danny Green (Wednesday from Sydney, AUS-will air on Hopkins/Ornelas undercard); Paul Williams vs. Sergio Martinez (Saturday 9:30pm from Atlantic City live on HBO); “Sports Jobs with Junior Seau” premieres (Wednesday 10pm VERSUS)

10-Rob Zombie (Saturday 7pm 9:30 Club), Switchfoot (Monday 7pm Rams Head Live), Tony Bennett (Saturday 8pm Meyerhoff Symphony Hall), Grammy Nominations Concert (Wednesday 9pm from Los Angeles live on CBS)

If “BLACKsummers’night” by Maxwell is not nominated for Album of the Year, NARAS should just go ahead and cease operations…..

(My gut on the other nominees? Green Day, Bruce Springsteen, U2, and Black Eyed Peas. Jay-Z’s was released too late; Lady Gaga and Kings of Leon were released too early to be nominated.)

9-Victoria’s Secret Fashion Show (Tuesday 10pm from New York on CBS)


(Editor’s note: If I need to write anything more about this entry; you and I probably wouldn’t be friends.)

8-Golf: Chevron World Challenge (Thursday & Friday 3pm live on Golf Channel; Saturday & Sunday 3pm live on NBC. All golf from Thousand Oaks, California)

A week ago, there was NO CHANCE I would have included this on my list. NO CHANCE. There’s 16 players playing in this event, and none of them are named “Tiger” or “Mickelson.” However, the event is RUN by Tiger Woods; which suddenly makes it a bit interesting. Not the golf itself-but the things surrounding the golf. Like, “Will Tiger show up?”, “What will Tiger have to say?” and “Will they add a dented mailbox and claw marks to the face of the AWESOME trophy they give the winner?”


7-NHL: Panthers @ Capitals (Thursday 7pm from Verizon Center live on Comcast SportsNet), Capitals @ Flyers (Saturday 7pm from Philadelphia live on Comcast SportsNet), Capitals @ Lightning (Monday 7:30pm from Tampa Bay live on Comcast SportsNet)

I cannot BELIEVE I already committed to driving around Baltimore Saturday to watch college hoops with Drew Forrester. I would have NEVER made such a commitment had I known that my BELOVED Fly-as were hosting those rat-fink Caps on Saturday night at the Wachovia Center. Let’s go Fly-as! Here’s a little video at shot with some friends at the WNST studios Friday night…….

6-UFC Ultimate Fighter Finale (Saturday 9pm from Las Vegas live on SpikeTV)

So, Kimbo Slice is fighting again, huh?

I just hope we see THIS Kimbo Slice……

And NOT the Kimbo Slice that somehow managed to lose to Ray Bachman……

5-Soccer: World Cup Draw (Friday 12pm from Cape Town, South Africa live on ESPN2); NCAA Tournament Elite 8: Maryland @ Virginia (Friday 7pm from Charlottesville)

As a broadcaster, there really is NOTHING worse than trying to do a broadcast of a “lottery”-type event. When I was on my spiritual journey to Phoenix two years ago, I was forced to do a live NBA Draft lottery show; as the Suns were the most popular team in town. Trying to take an hour to talk about where ping-pong balls might land was about as entertaining as listening to Jerry Coleman. (Love you Jerry.)

And as far as Virginia is concerned, after the pure misery of the last handful of times Maryland has faced Virginia in JUST ABOUT ANYTHING over the last few weeks, here’s some hard-hitting analysis:

“F*ck the Cavs.”


4-College Football: Oregon State @ Oregon (Thursday 9pm from Eugene live on ESPN), Cincinnati @ Pitt (Saturday 12pm live on ABC), SEC Championship Game: Florida vs. Alabama (Saturday 4pm from Atlanta live on CBS), Big 12 Championship Game: Nebraska vs. Texas (Saturday 8pm from Arlington, TX live on ABC), ACC Championship Game: Georgia Tech vs. Clemson (Saturday 8pm from Tampa live on ESPN); BCS Selection Show (Sunday 8pm live on FOX), NCAA Division 3 Tournament Quarterfinals: Johns Hopkins @ Wesley (Sunday 12pm from Dover)

Boy, this Florida/Alabama matchup is pretty interesting. I mean, on the Gators side you have…..


But on the Tide side you have…….


Of course, the Florida side also has Tim Tebow’s girlfriend…….


(Edit from GMC: For the record, I have NO IDEA if that is Tim Tebow’s girlfriend, but it IS the picture that comes first when you Google image search “Tim Tebow’s girlfriend”, and a lot of people seem to think she IS Tim Tebow’s girlfriend. And if not, she should be. He’s better than the rest of us.)

3-High School Football State Finals: 1A Final-Catoctin vs. Joppatowne (Saturday 12pm) 2A Final-Eastern Tech vs. Queen Anne’s (Saturday 3:30pm), 4A Final-Wise vs. Old Mill (Friday 7:30pm), 3A Final-Huntingtown vs. Linganore (Saturday 7pm. All games at M&T Bank Stadium)

And for the final time this football season, if you’re headed out to one of the title games this weekend in Charm City, remember……


2-College Basketball-Big Ten/ACC Challenge: Maryland @ Indiana (Tuesday 7:30pm from Bloomington live on ESPN2), BB&T Classic: Maryland vs. Villanova (Sunday 7:30pm from Verizon Center live on MASN), UMBC @ Towson (Wednesday 7pm Towson Center), Hofstra @ Towson (Saturday 4pm Towson Center), Morgan State @ Loyola (Tuesday 7:30pm from Reitz Arena live on MASN), Morgan State @ Coppin State (Saturday 4pm Coppin State Physical Education Complex)

Is there ANY chance that before their game against the Hoosiers Tuesday night, Gary Williams could deliver THIS speech to the Terps?

1-Ravens @ Packers (Monday 8:30pm from Green Bay live on ESPN)

Look, there’s no question who I’ll be rooting for Monday night, but I’ll have to admit that it’s hard to have much venom towards Aaron Rodgers and company; mostly because there is just NO WAY I can dislike the product their area is best known for…..


I mean-is there ANYTHING-IN THE WORLD-better than cheese??? We had broccoli and cheese as part of our family’s Thanksgiving celebration; and I actually tried to go swimming in the cheese that was left at the bottom of the serving bowl. I’m not kidding, either.

So while I hope the Pack lose this game 60-0, there will be a part of me that thinks “you know, maybe I should just move to Wisconsin already…..”

Flexing my mic muscles since 1983…..