Top 10 Baseball Distractions

May 17, 2010 | Glenn Clark

Honorable Mention-MMA: UWC 8 (Saturday 7pm Patriot Center), Strikeforce Challengers: Matt Lindland vs. Kevin Casey (Friday 11pm from Portland, OR live on Showtime); Boxing: Israel Vasquez vs. Rafael Marquez (Saturday 10pm live from Los Angeles live on Showtime); WNBA: New York Liberty @ Washington Mystics (Friday 7pm Verizon Center); Golf: PGA Tour HP Byron Nelson Championship (Thursday & Friday 3pm live on Golf Channel, Saturday & Sunday 3pm live on CBS. All golf from Irving, TX) LPGA Sybase Match Play Championship (Thursday & Friday 1pm, Saturday & Sunday 2pm from Gladstone, NJ live on Golf Channel); IIHF World Ice Hockey Championships (Semi-finals Saturday, Finals Sunday from Cologne, Germany live on Universal Sports); “MacGruber” and “Shrek Forever After” open in theaters (Friday), “Invictus” available on DVD & Blu-Ray (Tuesday)

10. Bamboozle Road Show feat. Good Charlotte and All Time Low (Saturday 3pm Merriweather Post Pavilion); Insane Clown Posse, Kottonmouth Kings & Coolio (Thursday 5:30pm Pier Six Pavilion); Brad Paisley & Darius Rucker (Saturday 7:30pm Jiffy Lube Live); B-52′s (Saturday 8pm Rams Head Live); Nicki Minaj (Saturday 9pm Sonar); Dave Matthews & Tim Reynolds (Thursday 7:30pm D.A.R. Constitution Hall), Neil Young (Monday 8pm D.A.R. Constitution Hall); Jimmy Fallon (Saturday 8pm Warner Theatre); DC101 Chili Cookoff feat. Stone Temple Pilots, Alice In Chains and Cage The Elephant (Saturday 12:30pm RFK Stadium); Chesapeake Bay Blues Festival feat. Buddy Guy and Chuck Berry (Saturday & Sunday all day Sandy Point State Park); Anthony Bourdain & Eric Ripert (Saturday 8pm France-Merrick Performing Arts Theatre)

Or what I want to call the strangest clusterf*ck of live shows to ever hit Charm City and the surrounding areas.

Seriously, Coolio is playing a show in Baltimore this week. Did any of you know Coolio was still performing? Alive??? I’m not hating either. Coolio kicked ass…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=e-7o4A80TlI[/youtube]

A lot of people don’t like Good Charlotte. Don’t count me among them. Benji and Joel Madden are amongst the biggest Orioles fans on the face of the planet. We need as many of them as we can get.

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j4t54bPUvmg[/youtube]

When Dave Matthews and Tim Reynolds have hung out together in the past, good things have been known to happen…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lf1j1zrnxss[/youtube]

If I were a better son, I’d take my dad to see Chuck Berry in Annapolis. He’ll have to settle for the Beach Boys later this summer…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6ofD9t_sULM[/youtube]

And Anthony Bourdain is doing a stage show. I’ll admit to not knowing much about Anthony Bourdain other than the fact that he once ate lake trout and hung with “Snoop” from The Wire on his show “No Reservations”…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9I-jYV1KHiw[/youtube]

9. World Series of Flip Cup (Saturday 3:30pm Recher Theatre)

Not all college athletes are competing for NCAA Championships. Some are competing for far more noble causes. Like the cause of turning over plastic red cups. And maybe in the process…if you’re an attractive female competitor…making out with your fellow competitors.

Just remember this much as you choose your team for Saturday’s showdown in Towson…

flipcup

8. Auto Racing: NASCAR All-Star Race (Saturday 9pm from Charlotte live on SPEED), NASCAR Showdown (Saturday 7:30pm from Charlotte live on SPEED); IndyCar Series Indianapolis 500 Qualifying (Saturday 11am, Sunday 12pm from Indianapolis live on VERSUS)

The thing about the All-Star Race is that NASCAR changes things to be more TV friendly.

Amongst the changes this year? It will be a football game instead of a car race.

In all seriousness, if you enjoy left turns and/or know where to find SPEED on your XFinity lineup; this is probably* worth watching on Saturday night.

*In that, if you’re at home on a Saturday night and have nothing better to watch than an exhibition car race on a channel no one has ever heard of, it might be time to start thinking about where you are in your life.

7. Tennis: French Open (Roland Garros) opening round (Sunday 12pm live on ESPN2, Monday 5am live on Tennis Channel. Action from Paris.)

You’re thinking to yourself, “this is just an excuse for Glenn to post some shirtless picture of his true love Andy Roddick.”

But you’re wrong. You see, until A-Rod wins another Grand Slam event, I’m not giving him any more of the “drooling” type of attention.

Instead, I’m excited for all of the tennis action. With Rafael Nadal healthy, he’ll be looking to re-claim his title from defending champ Roger Federer. Robin Soderling reached the final last year, Andy Murray is coming off a Grand Slam final at the Australian Open in January, and Juan Martin Del Potro is still riding high from his U.S. Open victory last September.

You know, I tried. I really tried.

Let’s go Andy!

andy

6. Pro Wrestling: WWE Over The Limit (Sunday 8pm from Detroit live on Pay-Per-View)

Why am I excited for Over The Limit? I get the feeling we might see more of The Bella Twins…

bellatwins

5. Ravens Passing Camp (Tuesday-Thursday; availability Tuesday from 1 Winning Drive)

What Joe Flacco is doing > what you’re doing.

Of course, with the new rules the Ravens passed down, I’m not sure I’m allowed to report anything Joe Flacco does in Owings Mills this week. I’ll touch on that at another time.

Before heading back to Owings Mills, Mark Clayton made a pit stop at his old stomping grounds in Norman, Oklahoma to finish off his degree. I know a gal who is a proud Oklahoma alum and huge Sooners fan, so I took to Facebook over the weekend to let her know the good news.

When she asked me what he majored in, I could only make the assumption I would make about any Oklahoma football player in the Bob Stoops era.

“I’m pretty sure it was BCS Bowl Game Losing.”

4. NHL Playoffs: Eastern Conference Finals-Flyers/Canadiens (Game 2 Tuesday 7pm from Philadelphia live on VERSUS, Game 3 Thursday 7pm from Montreal live on VERSUS, Game 4 Saturday 3pm from Montreal live on NBC); Western Conference Finals-Sharks/Blackhawks (Game 2 Tuesday 10pm from San Jose live on VERSUS, Game 3 Friday 8pm from Chicago live on VERSUS, Game 4 Sunday 3pm from Chicago live on NBC)

So let me get this straight: the Habs have already made sports fans in Washington and Pittsburgh miserable; and now they have to chance to make fans in Philadelphia miserable as well? Do you think there’s a chance we could schedule them for a series against the Indianapolis Ice next, and then some random hockey team at Duke after that???

I’ve posted pictures of Youppi the last two weeks and I’ve seen the Canadiens win. I’m not going to risk doing anything else this week…

youppi

3. NBA Playoffs: Eastern Conference Finals-Celtics/Magic (Game 2 Tuesday 8:30pm from Orlando, Game 3 Saturday 8:30pm from Boston, Game 4 Monday 8:30pm from Boston. All games live on ESPN); Western Conference Finals-Suns/Lakers (Game 2 Wednesday 9pm from Los Angeles, Game 3 Sunday 8:30pm from Phoenix. All games live on TNT); NBA Draft Lottery (Tuesday 8pm from Secaucus, NJ live on ESPN)

As I said Sunday via Twitter, it’s nice to see JJ Redick continue his long-standing tradition of missing big shots in the final minutes of big games. I am by no means rooting for any team from Boston, but I know this much. No team is winning a big game with this guy on the floor late…

jj

Thanks Rich in Westminster.

As you know, I’m a Phoenix Suns fan-despite what Steve Nash did to the Terrapins back when he was with Santa Clara. It’s just hard to stay mad at the guy…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TJ66pCgcw_E[/youtube]

2. College Lacrosse-Men’s NCAA Tournament: Notre Dame vs. Maryland (Saturday 12pm from Princeton, NJ live on ESPNU); Men’s Division III NCAA Tournament: Roanoke @ Stevenson (Wednesday 4pm Caves Athletic Complex-semifinals Sunday; winner faces Salisbury/Haverford winner) Women’s NCAA Tournament: Penn @ Maryland (Saturday 12pm Ludwig Field); MIAA High School Lacrosse: (A Conference Semis Tuesday 6pm & 8:30pm, Conference Finals Saturday 3pm, 5:30pm & 8pm. All action from Unitas Stadium); MLL: Chesapeake Bayhawks @ Toronto Nationals (Saturday 2pm from Toronto live on ESPN2)

How convenient! I already don’t like the Fighting Irish! I won’t have to learn how to hate a new team!!!

As I like to on days where games of this magnitude are played; I will be wearing this…

ndsucks

1. Soccer: UEFA Champions League Final-Bayern Munich vs. Inter Milan (Saturday 2:30pm from Madrid live on FOX), NASL: Portland Timbers @ Crystal Palace Baltimore (Saturday 7pm UMBC Stadium), MLS: DC United @ Houston Dynamo (Saturday 8pm from Houston live on Galavision), Team USA Women vs. Germany (Saturday 6pm from Cleveland live on ESPN2)

For those of you that aren’t aware, the Champions League Final is like the Super Bowl of European sports. Being an Italian myself, I will be pulling for Inter Milan (or Internazionale if you will), and will ABSOLUTELY be rooting for them again when they invade Baltimore this summer for a match against Manchester City at M&T Bank Stadium. Although I will admit I don’t exactly follow their every match.

Think about it though. You could root for Bayern Munich, and support a country whose greatest accomplishment is a weird pair of tight shorts with suspenders…

lederhosen

Or you could root for Inter Milan, and support a country whose greatest accomplishment looks more like this…

pizza

Is it really a question?

Flexing my mic muscles since 1983…

-G

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