Top 10 Baseball Distractions

June 29, 2010 | Glenn Clark

Honorable Mention: WNBA-Indiana Fever @ Washington Mystics (Tuesday 7pm from Verizon Center live on ESPN2); Arena Football League: Chicago Rush @ Tampa Bay Storm (Friday 6:30pm from St. Petersburg, FL live on NFL Network)

10. Chicago & The Doobie Brothers (Wednesday 7:30pm Jiffy Lube Live), Victor Wooten (Saturday 8pm Recher Theatre), Pat Benatar & REO Speedwagon (Tuesday 7:30pm Wolf Trap), Pat McGee Band (Thursday 8pm Wolf Trap), Chuck Brown (Saturday 8pm & 11pm Rams Head On Stage), (hed) p.e. (Thursday 7:30pm Jaxx) “A Capitol 4th” featuring Darius Rucker & Gladys Knight (Sunday 8pm from U.S. Capitol live on PBS), “Uncle Sam Jam” featuring Soul Asylum & Virginia Coalition (Sunday 3pm Southwest DC Waterfront), “Frederick’s 4th” featuring Kelly Bell Band & Jerrod Niemann (Sunday 12pm Baker Park in Frederick); “Hot Tub Time Machine” available on DVD & Blu-Ray (Tuesday)

It’s not all local, but a lot of it is very good. I don’t care what they said in “The 40 Year Old Virgin”, Michael McDonald doing “What a Fool Believes” is a high point in musical history, even if he isn’t with the band anymore…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5GPGzVfMttQ[/youtube]

Seeing Pat McGee Band? Awesome. Seeing Pat McGee Band cover “Southern Cross”? Somehow awesomer…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t3wzuoRSfvY[/youtube]

Virginia Coalition may be the most underrated band in the world….

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L4G8buoYZYk[/youtube]

And as I said recently via Facebook (just search for “Glenn Clark”), if you don’t love Darius Rucker doing David Allan Coe’s “You Never Even Called Me By My Name”, you just might as well hate everything else about America too…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wY7SWkYV0_8[/youtube]

9. Cycling: Tour De France (Saturday 11:30am, Sunday & Monday 8:30am from France live on VERSUS)

Look, I would love to pretend that I gave a crap about bike riding, but I don’t. I’ll be pulling for Lance Armstrong (is he still riding?) mostly because I love America; but also because he’s a big fan of ESPN8 “The Ocho”….

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BcQ4E1cxLJ4[/youtube]

8. Auto Racing: NASCAR Coke Zero 400 (Saturday 7:30pm from Daytona, FL live on TNT), IndyCar Series Camping World Grand Prix at The Glen (Sunday 3:30pm from Watkins Glen, NY live on ABC)

So, why didn’t anyone tell me Danica Patrick was returning to the NASCAR Nationwide Series last weekend before I posted my Top 10???

danica

Trust me, I wouldn’t have watched-but it would have at least been fun to post more pictures of here like the one above!

7. Golf: PGA Tour AT&T National (Thursday & Friday 3pm live on Golf Channel, Saturday & Sunday 3pm live on CBS. All Tiger Woods-hosted golf from Newton Square, PA), Champions Tour Montreal Championship (Friday-Sunday 6pm from Montreal live on Golf Channel)

Since we know what Tiger Woods is up to, let’s check in on what Rachel Uchitel is up to…

uchitel

You know, I think she’s doing alright.

6. Baltimore 4th of July Fireworks (Sunday 9pm Inner Harbor), Kingsville 4th of July Parade (Saturday 10am Kingsville)

With no offense to the folks in Dundalk, Towson, Bel Air or anywhere else where there’s going to be a parade this weekend; I just so happen to prefer the Kingsville one. Not just because I was born in Kingsville, but more because while I’m there it gives me a chance to take chicks back to the Jericho Covered Bridge and….ummm….talk….

bridge

5. High School Lacrosse: Under Armour All-America Lacrosse (Saturday Girls Game 5:30pm, Boys Game 8pm Unitas Stadium); MLL: Chesapeake Bayhawks @ Denver Outlaws (Sunday 9pm from Denver live on ESPN3)

And if you’re planning on heading out to Towson this weekend to check out some lacrosse, make sure you remember…

jailbait

…this ISN’T Venezuela….

4. Soccer: World Cup-Paraguay vs. Japan (Tuesday 10am from Pretoria, South Africa live on ESPN), Spain vs. Portugal (Tuesday 2:30pm from Cape Town, South Africa live on ESPN), Netherlands vs. Brazil (Friday 10am from Port Elizabeth, South Africa live on ESPN), Uruguay vs. Ghana (Friday 2:30pm from Johannesburg, South Africa live on ESPN), Argentina vs. Germany (Saturday 10am from Cape Town live on ABC), Paraguay/Japan winner vs. Spain/Portugal winner (Saturday 2:30pm from Johannesburg live on ABC); U.S. Open Cup: Richmond Kickers vs. DC United (Wednesday 7:30pm George Mason Stadium); MLS: DC United @ San Jose Earthquakes (Saturday 10:30pm from San Jose live on Comcast SportsNet &http://wnst.net/wordpress/glennclark/wp-admin/post.php?action=edit&post=8779 MLS Direct Kick)

Attention Paraguay: PLEASE KEEP LARISSA RIQUELME IN THE WORLD CUP!!!!!!

larissa

If that means you have to stay in the Cup as well, so be it.

3. Mixed Martial Arts: UFC 116: Brock Lesnar vs. Shane Carwin (Saturday 10pm from Las Vegas live on Pay-Per-View)

The UFC won’t let MMA fans watch fights on YouTube, BUT….they WILL let MMA fans watch videos of ACTION FIGURES fighting on YouTube…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7bXj3IWC44E[/youtube]

…and honestly, that’s pretty awesome too.

2. Competitive Eating: Nathan’s Famous 4th of July International Hot Dog Eating Contest (Sunday 12pm from Coney Island live on ESPN); Phillips Harborplace Crab Cake Eating Contest (Saturday 1pm Harborplace Ampitheater)

This is the greatest American hero alive…

chestnut

Important question. When and where will the first ever Baltimore Peach Cake eating competition be? I will OWN…

peachcake

1. Tennis: Wimbledon (Tuesday-Thursday 7am live on ESPN2, 10am live on NBC; Friday 7am live on ESPN2, 12pm live on NBC; Saturday 9am-Ladies’ Final-live on NBC; Sunday 9am-Gentlemen’s Final-live on NBC. All tennis from London.)

Of COURSE Andy Roddick would lose to some dude that no one on the face of the FREAKING PLANET HAS EVER HEARD OF. Why wouldn’t he?

At least we had the Isner match. Now, we’ll most certainly get Federer-Nadal again. With no offense to Federer or Nadal; I’m pretty sure I’ve seen that one before.

Of course, England has a chance to have a homegrown champion this year. No, not Andy Murray. I was thinking more along the lines of Peter Colt. Don’t judge me for liking this movie…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DTZFMhpNFfY[/youtube]

Flexing my mic muscles since 1983…

-G

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