Top 10 Baseball Distractions

July 19, 2010 | Glenn Clark

Honorable Mention: Volleyball-AVP Long Beach Open (Sunday 4pm live on ABC, 11pm live on ESPN2. All volleyball from Long Beach, CA); WNBA: Atlanta Dream @ Washington Mystics (Wednesday 11:30am from Verizon Center live on Comcast SportsNet), Indiana Fever @ Washington Mystics (Saturday 7pm from Verizon Center live on Comcast SportsNet)

10. Vans Warped Tour feat. Reel Big Fish & Alkaline Trio (Tuesday 11am Merriweather Post Pavilion); Beach Boys (Saturday 6:30m Pier Six Pavilion), Willie Nelson (Sunday 6pm Pier Six Pavilion); Dave Matthews Band & Zac Brown Band (Friday 7pm Nationals Park); Iron Maiden (Tuesday 7:30pm Jiffy Lube Live), Santana (Sunday 7:30pm Jiffy Lube Live); American Idol Live! (Saturday 7:30pm 1st Mariner Arena); Better Than Ezra (Friday 8pm Power Plant Live); Gary Hoey (Friday 7pm Rams Head Live), Interpol (Sunday 7pm Rams Head Live); Fear Factory (Monday 6pm Recher Theatre); Bay City Rollers (Monday 8pm Rams Head On Stage); John Witherspoon (Thursday-Sunday DC Improv); “An American Playlist” feat. Smokey Robinson & John Mayer (Tuesday 6pm Kennedy Center for the Performing Arts); Roger Clyne & The Peacemakers (Sunday 8pm State Theatre)

I will be attending some of these things. I saw Dave Matthews Band and Zac Brown Band at HersheyPark two weeks ago; and I hope that I can avoid vomiting in my mouth at all of the signs of Steven Strasburg I’ll see at Nats Park. If DMB does “Eh Hee” again, that will help…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0U44PsjIvBY[/youtube]

And as far as Zac Brown is concerned; maybe they can channel Rage Against the Machine again…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_ChmnEFUGoA[/youtube]

I’ll also be at Pier Six Saturday night to check out the Beach Boys with the great Tom Clark and Karen Clark (my parents, yeah); and will ABSOLUTELY be singing along to every word of every song, including…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L–cqAI3IUI[/youtube]

If I wasn’t going to be at Dave Matthews Friday night, I’d ABSOLUTELY be at Power Plant Live. I remember hearing “Good” in the trailers for “The Baby-Sitters Club” when I was 11 years old and I’ve absolutely loved Better Than Ezra ever since…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ji0pyRmSnTY[/youtube]

And you may not be familiar with Roger Clyne & The Peacemakers (Roger used to be in a great band called The Refreshments), the word that comes to mind with them is “fun”…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vornIS2QG2k[/youtube]

9. MMA-Strikeforce: Challengers (Friday 11pm from Everett, WA live on Showtime)

There have been a ton of rumors flying around the Mixed Martial Arts world that  Strikeforce might consider putting Bobby Lashley and Dave Batista in the main event of a Pay-Per-View card. My response to that would be “YES PLEASE YES OH THANK GOD YES PLEASE!!!!!”

I do get the feeling I may have seen this before…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OUj07_f89i4[/youtube]

8. Tennis-ATP Tour U.S. Open Series Atlanta Tennis Championships (Friday 12pm live on Tennis Channel, 4pm & 7pm live on ESPN2; Saturday 1:30pm live on ESPN2, 7pm live on Tennis Channel; Sunday 3pm live on ESPN2, 8pm live on Tennis Channel); World Team Tennis-New York Sportimes @ Washington Kastles (Tuesday 7pm Kastles Stadium), St. Louis Aces @ Washington Kastles (Wednesday 7pm Kastles Stadium)

Despite the fact that he was bounced in an unforgivable type of upset loss at Wimbledon; I’m still excited for this event simply because Andy Roddick is involved. And given the lack of talent in Hotlanta this year, he has a real chance of winning-which would be a nice change of pace for him.

John Isner is will be playing in the event as well; after playing about 1,876 games in London. He was also a winner at the ESPY Awards last week…although the real winners were Paul Rudd and Steve Carell…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EpEdFWXrgWI[/youtube]

7. Soccer: NASL-AC St. Louis @ Crystal Palace Baltimore (Saturday 3pm Maryland SoccerPlex); U.S. Open Cup: Harrisburg City Islanders @ DC United (Wednesday 7:30pm Maryland SoccerPlex); MLS Friendly: Portsmouth FC @ DC United (Saturday 7:30pm RFK Stadium); FIFA Under-20 Women’s World Cup: Team USA vs. Korea Republic (Wednesday 12pm from Augsburg, Germany live on ESPN2)

With no offense to soccer, but has anyone noticed that since the World Cup ended…well…um…no one really cares anymore? I mean, Landon Donovan was in DC the other day, and it barely even got mention on SportsCenter.

It’s with that in mind that I offer a suggestion. Why don’t we just fire all of the current players and replace them with this team???

soccer

Just a suggestion…

6. Golf: PGA Tour RBC Canadian Open (Thursday & Friday 3pm live on Golf Channel, Saturday & Sunday 3pm live on CBS. All golf from Toronto); Champions Tour Senior British Open (Thursday & Friday 12pm live on TNT, Saturday 1:30pm Sunday 1pm live on ABC. All golf from Berkshire, England); LPGA Tour Evian Masters (Thursday & Friday 6:30pm, Saturday & Sunday 1pm from Evian-les-Bains, France live on Golf Channel)

Kinda hard to imagine everyone won’t be watching golf this weekend, huh? I mean…we’re a world with “Oosthuizen Fever”, right?

Remember when golf’s major championships used to be events won by golfers we had actually HEARD OF and were watched by at least a partial majority of sports fans?

I barely do either.

These days, golf majors are won by folks like Y.E. Yang or Graeme McDowell or Trevor Immelman. Scott Van Pelt and Andy North have to get together every few weeks and say something like “you think this guy could ever win another one???” I think ESPN actually has a recording of Andy North saying “he has the talent to do it” that they just keep on a loop 4 times a year.

By the way, props to “Late Show with David Letterman” writer/producer Eric Stangel; who had the British Open-related “Tweet of the Week”.

“Tiger Woods won’t win British Open. Fun Fact: Back when he was chasing women, he did date a stripper named Claret Juggs.”

You can follow Eric on Twitter @EricStangel. You can follow us @WNST. I think you know who I think you should follow…

(Edit from GMC: No! US! Come on….)

5. Cycling: Tour De France (Tuesday, Thursday-Sunday 8am from France live on VERSUS)

Apparently Greg LeMond and Lance Armstrong are currently in some sort of girlfight regarding steroids. I’d tell you more, but you wouldn’t care. Which is sorta how I feel about the Tour De France incidentally.

How can so many terrible events be happening at the same time right now when there are so many GREAT events happening at other times during the year?

This isn’t even about there not being an American winning the Tour right now. Levi Leipheimer could be winning the event naked and no one would care. How do I know that? I had to hit Google just to find the name of a cyclist who WASN’T Lance Armstrong.

I’m reasonably certain Levi Leipheimer could cycle naked through his family reunion and most folks would say something like “how do you think Florida will do this season without Tim Tebow???”

4. Lacrosse: FIL World Lacrosse Championships Final (Saturday 11am from Manchester, England live on ESPNU); MLL: Chesapeake Bayhawks @ Long Island Lizards (Thursday 8pm from New York live on ESPN3)

Yeah, ESPNU is a logical place for this game…considering it’s a college matchup?!?!?!?

I get it, beggars can’t be choosers-but why not just put the freaking game on ESPN2? It’s on at 11am…there’s nothing else to compete against.

I don’t know if you could tell, but I’m in a ranting mood. With that in mind, here’s Lewis Black. Maybe I’ll feel better after that. (Edit from GMC: Language NSFW. Unless you work at Comedy Central. If you do…HELP?)

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yNGWn-aWn5g[/youtube]

3. Auto Racing: NASCAR Brickyard 400 (Sunday 1pm from Indianapolis live on ESPN); IndyCar Series Honda Indy Edmonton (Sunday 5pm from Edmonton live on VERSUS)

The thing to do when you win in Indy is “kiss the bricks.”

Unless of course you’re a Ravens fan-in which case the thing to do in Indy is…

irsay

Not that I condone it. (Edit from GMC: At least publicly.)

2. Ravens QB’s & Rookies Report to Training Camp (Monday McDaniel College)

They’re not practicing Monday. Don’t go to Westminster.

BUT…football season begins in days. Our long civic nightmare in Charm City is over.

I’m so happy that I think we need to cue Sly & The Family Stone…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hiIBwu2mjs0[/youtube]

1. Indoor Football: AIFA Championship Bowl IV-Baltimore Mariners vs. Wyoming Cavalry (Sunday 4pm 1st Mariner Arena); AFL Chicago Rush @ Spokane Shock (Friday 8pm from Spokane, WA live on NFL Network)

You see, we were promised that the cavalry was coming to Baltimore, and they’re finally getting here!

The good news is that I hate Wyoming anyway. You know…because…they…ummm… exist?

Whatever the reason, go Mariners!

(Edit from GMC: As my roommate-”The Luckiest Dang Roommate on the Face of the Planet” would say-”Win or Lose-We Riot!”)

Flexing my mic muscles since 1983…

-G

Comments on Facebook

Comments are closed.