Honorable Mention: Soccer-NASL: Vancouver Whitecaps @ Crystal Palace Baltimore (Saturday 5pm Paul Angelo Russo Stadium-Calvert Hall), MLS: DC United @ Toronto FC (Saturday 4pm from Toronto live on Comcast SportsNet and MLS Direct Kick); Mixed Martial Arts: Shine Fights (Friday 9pm from Oklahoma live on Pay-Per-View)
10. Lady Gaga (Tuesday 8pm Verizon Center); Buckcherry/Flyleaf/Charm City Devils/Sick Puppies (Thursday 6pm Power Plant Live), Blues Traveler (Friday 8pm Power Plant Live); Kottonmouth Kings (Saturday 7pm Rams Head Live), Toadies (Sunday 7pm Rams Head Live), Seether (Monday 7pm Rams Head Live); Pat McGee (Saturday 8:30pm Rams Head On Stage), Ozomatli (Monday 8pm Rams Head On Stage); Big Boi (Wednesday 7pm 9:30 Club); Blondie (Wednesday 8:30pm State Theatre); Deadliest Catch Live (Wednesday 8pm Lyric Opera House); York Fair (Friday-Monday York Fairgrounds); Maryland Seafood Festival (Friday-Sunday Sandy Point State Park); In The Street Festival (Saturday 11am Market Street & Carroll Creek Linear Park Frederick)
I’m leaving Lady Gaga alone. I’m probably the only one in the world who will do that. Trust me, I find her just as fascinating as the rest of you-but there’s NO chance I’d pay money to go see her live.
You see what you made me do? I spent 42 words on Lady Gaga. Ugh.
Moving on, I’m a much bigger fan of Flyleaf than you’d ever realize…
I WILL be attending Blues Traveler after the Purple Party Friday night. John Popper and I are kindred souls…
“Possum Kingdom” might be the only song I’m really interested in seeing the Toadies do, but it’s really a hell of a song…
I LOVE Outkast in a way that doesn’t fit the love I feel for a lot of other things in the world. Big Boi’s new record is freaking TREMENDOUS, if not necessarily Safe For Work…
If I had time to play NHL 11, there is no doubt that I would somehow find a way to make Viktor Tikhonov the greatest player in the league.
By the way, if I DID play NHL 11-there would be a 100% chance you’d see a Jason Lee/Jeremy London type moment from “Mallrats” with me…
“Hartford, the Whale? They beat Vancouver once, maybe twice in a lifetime.”
If you get the reference, you’re a winner. And I offer this to you as a prize. Oh but once again, it isn’t necessarily the type of prize that has language completely safe for work…
8. Golf: PGA Tour FedEx Cup Playoffs-BMW Championship (Thursday & Friday 3pm live on Golf Channel, Saturday 12pm Sunday 2pm live on NBC. All golf from Lemont, Illinois); LPGA Tour P&G NW Arkansas Championship Presented by Walmart (Friday 12:30pm, Saturday & Sunday 4pm from Rogers, Arkansas live on Golf Channel); Champions Tour Posco E&C Songdo Championship (Friday-Sunday 6:30pm from Songdo, Korea live on Golf Channel); Team USA Ryder Cup Selection Show (Tuesday 10:30am Golf Channel)
A week after some dude named Matt Kuchar won a golf tournament, some dude named Charley Hoffman won the next one. I’m not even kidding about this-when I heard Charley Hoffman had won a playoff event, I thought “Brandt” from The Big Lebowski had somehow been victorious.
Oh and also, Tiger Woods is still mediocre. Which is (I guess) enough to warrant coverage on SportsCenter. Frankly, I’d prefer more table tennis highlights myself…
7. Auto Racing-NASCAR Air Guard 400 (Saturday 7:30pm from Richmond live on ABC)
I’d like to pretend I care about this. I know Rex Snider is taking some sort of bus trip down to Richmond Saturday, but it just isn’t my type of thing. Not because I’m shallow-minded, but more because I just like to actually be ENTERTAINED when I spend my entertainment dollar.
Speaking of entertaining, this Oregon Trail-related photo qualifies (Thanks Gorilla Mask!)…
6. High School Football: Southern @ Glen Burnie (Friday 6:30pm), Overlea @ Perry Hall (Friday 7pm)
You mean to tell me that Overlea-home of the Falcons-is facing Perry Hall-home of the mighty Gators-Friday night?
AN ALMA MATER SHOWDOWN BETWEEN GLENN CLARK AND THE GREAT TOM CLARK?!?!?!
You’re going down, dad.
5. Basketball: FIBA World Championships-Team USA vs. Russia quarterfinal (Thursday 11am from Istanbul, Turkey live on ESPN), Semifinals and Final (Friday-Sunday from Istanbul live on ESPN)
HOLY CRAP I LOVE THIS. USA-Russia?!?!?!? DOWN WITH THE SOVIETS!!!
Let’s do to them what we did to Ivan Drago…
4. Pro Wrestling: WWE Smackdown (Tuesday 6:45pm from 1st Mariner Arena-airs Friday 8pm on MyNetwork24)
Despite the fact that there’s way too much Jack Swagger, Big Show, Rey Mysterio and Cody Rhodes on Smackdown, I still kinda dig it. Undertaker is a rock star, Kane is underrated, and the combination of CM Punk, Matt Hardy and Christian is completely underused.
And oh yeah-they also have Rosa Mendes…
3. College Football: Morgan State @ Maryland (Saturday 6pm from Byrd Stadium live on ESPN3.com); Georgia Southern @ Navy (Saturday 3:30pm from Navy-Marine Corps Memorial Stadium live on CBS College Sports)
The Terrapins may have been fortunate to survive the “Crab Bowl Classic” against the Midshipmen; but the fact remains that they ARE 1-0.
The other fact remains that Kenny Tate has earned himself a few free dinners in the future…
2. Tennis: U.S. Open (Tuesday-Thursday 11am live on Tennis Channel 7pm live on ESPN2, Friday 12:30pm live on CBS, Saturday 12pm-mens semifinals 8pm-Women’s Final live on CBS, Sunday 1pm Women’s Doubles Final live on ESPN2 4pm Men’s Final live on CBS. All tennis from New York)
At this point, I think it’s fair to say I’m COMPLETELY FREAKING OUT about heading up to Flushing Meadows Sunday. There’s roughly 0.1% chance an American will be there (no pressure Sam Querrey), but if it’s Roger Federer-Rafael Nadal everything will be cool in my book.
And you don’t even need to bother asking. I WILL be purchasing a few of these while I’m in The Big Apple…
1. NFL: Monday Night Football-Baltimore Ravens @ New York Jets (Monday 7pm from East Rutherford, New Jersey live on ESPN); WNST “Purple Friday” Pep Rally (Friday 5pm Sports Legends at Camden Yards)
FOOTBALL IS REALLY (REALLY) BACK.
Oh. Thank. God.
Me personally, I think it will be cool not only to see the Ravens back in action Monday night, but also to see some of my favorite reality TV stars like Antonio Cromartie and Rex Ryan…
Flexing my mic muscles since 1983…