Top 10 Baseball Distractions

October 18, 2010 | Glenn Clark

Honorable Mention: FallBall College Lacrosse: Maryland @ Loyola (Friday 7pm Ridley Athletic Complex); “Paranormal Activity 2″ opens in theaters (Friday)

10. Darius Rucker (Friday 7pm Pier Six Pavilion), 311 (Saturday 7pm Pier Six Pavilion); Robert Randolph & The Family Band, Martin Sexton (Friday 8pm Rams Head Live), Matt And Kim (Saturday 8pm Rams Head Live), Bad Religion (Sunday 7pm Rams Head Live); Jenny & Johnny (Monday 8pm Rams Head Live); All Time Low (Saturday 8pm Recher Theatre); Helmet (Friday 8pm Sonar); Yonder Mountain String Band (Saturday 10pm 9:30 Club); Buddy Guy (Tuesday & Wednesday 7:30pm Birchmere); Louis CK (Friday 7:30pm & 10pm Warner Theatre); Guster (Saturday 7pm D.A.R. Constitution Hall), Lifehouse (Sunday 7:30pm D.A.R. Constitution Hall); Kelly Bell Band (Saturday 8pm Field House); Tom Papa (Saturday 8pm Stevenson University); B.o.B. and Wale (Sunday 7pm Towson Center); Kings of Leon “Come Around Sundown” available in stores/on iTunes (Tuesday)

I don’t care how you feel about country music. I’m going to see Darius Rucker Friday night. And as I told Boomer Sooner already, I will NOT be held responsible for my actions if he channels Prince…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nX3-S649cvo[/youtube]

If anyone has some extra 311 tickets Saturday night, I know a certain doughy sports DJ that would be willing to take them off your hands…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KWo-02Hsab4[/youtube]

Since I’m going to be at Darius Rucker Friday night I’m going to miss Robert Randolph. (It’s okay, I’m going to see him a week later in DC. I know you were worried.) For those of you who WILL be at Rams Head Friday night, you’ll be in for a treat…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GBMh6RmR8Ko[/youtube]

So…I have some friends who go to Towson. Can they please explain to me why none of them have invited me to the B.O.B. show Sunday night?!?!?

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WGRtstkjdrQ[/youtube]

And finally, my copy of “Come Around Sundown” better be ready on iTunes before sun UP on Tuesday. That is all…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wPBbMbKSZrQ[/youtube]

9. Cirque Du Soleil “OVO” final week (Tuesday-Sunday National Harbor DC)

If I’m going, Paul Rudd better be bringing me some shrooms for the event. (You REALLY don’t get the reference? REALLY? Please check here…)

Seriously though, the whole thing just looks like an acid trip to me…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C4DfSBnBR08[/youtube]

8. Soccer: MLS-Toronto FC @ DC United (Saturday 7:30pm from RFK Stadium live on MLS Direct Kick); College Soccer: Colgate @ Maryland (Tuesday 7:30pm Ludwig Field), Wake Forest @ Maryland (Saturday 7pm Ludwig Field); Hartford @ UMBC (Saturday 1pm UMBC Soccer Stadium)

Apparently this is Jaime Moreno’s final match with DC United-which is apparently meaningful somehow. I’d tell you how if I knew, trust me. I’m not just being a jerk and withholding information from you. I genuinely don’t know.

Now…if it was Jamie BRADFORD’s final match with DC United, I’m pretty sure I would understand the significance…

jamieb

7. NHL: Boston Bruins @ Washington Capitals (Tuesday 7:30pm from Verizon Center live on VERSUS), Washington Capitals @ Boston Bruins (Thursday 7pm from Boston live on Comcast SportsNet & NHL Network), Atlanta Thrashers @ Washington Capitals (Saturday 7pm from Verizon Center live on Comcast SportsNet)

As you know, I’m not a Caps fan. They play in Washington-which I’m sure you’re aware is the same place where the Redskins play. I dislike both of them.

That being said…I probably hate Boston just as much if not more. Especially considering the fact that the Ravens just lost to the New England Patriots. Eff Boston. Eff New England. Eff Papa Gino’s. Eff Bill Simmons. Eff Fenway Park. Eff Sweet Caroline.

Unless it’s Dave Matthews playing Sweet Caroline. At Fenway Park. Then we’ll momentarily enjoy it and then pretend to be mad about it later.

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7B6OVkLlyuA[/youtube]

6. High School Football: Perry Hall @ Dulaney (Saturday 1pm), Severna Park @ Glen Burnie (Friday 6:30pm)

You know…I was feeling a bit dejected about the fact that my Gators couldn’t hang on Friday night and beat Franklin. I really was. It was Homecoming, and a loss to the Indians really kinda hurt.

But…at least I don’t root for the Gophers like a certain other personality on “The Morning Reaction” that I know.

That’s right, ol’ Drew Forrester’s alma mater had a hell of a night Friday night. Final score? Old Mill 83, Glen Burnie….zero.

83-0?!?!?

I think Old Mill would have gotten better competition from THIS team…

littlegiants

5. Auto Racing: NASCAR Tums Fast Relief 500 (Sunday 1pm from Martinsville, VA live on ESPN)

NASCAR races really aren’t my thing-even when they reach their “playoffs.”

But while I’ve never actually been to Martinsville, I get the feeling that this is probably more exciting than what folks USUALLY do in town…

walmart

4. Pro Wrestling: WWE Bragging Rights (Sunday 8pm from Minneapolis live on Pay-Per-View)

I usually offer you one good reason to watch WWE’s monthly PPV event. This time, I have two. Those reasons are named Brie Bella and Nikki Bella…

bellatwins

Ahh yes, the Bella Twins. They’re wrestlers. Or something. Apparently. Lord, I don’t know. They’re hot. Isn’t that enough for you people?

3. Mixed Martial Arts: UFC 121-Brock Lesnar vs. Cain Velasquez (Saturday 10pm from Anaheim live on Pay-Per-View), Strikeforce Challengers-Roger Bowling vs. Bobby Voelker (Friday 11pm from Fresno, CA live on Showtime); Bellator Fighting Championships 33: Roger Huerta vs. Eddie Alvarez (Thursday 8pm from Philadelphia live on Fox Sports Net)

The entire sport of MMA is much better for having Brock Lesnar part of it. Why’s that? Well…remember when he and Big Show did THIS???

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2POmlpVREWI[/youtube]

2. College Football: Maryland @ Boston College (Saturday 1pm from Chestnut Hill, Mass. live on ESPN3.com), Navy vs. Notre Dame (Saturday 12pm from East Rutherford, NJ live on CBS), Delaware State @ Morgan State (Saturday 1pm Hughes Stadium)

This is great. I like the Midshipmen and I don’t like the Fighting Irish. In fact, I REALLY don’t like the Irish. GO MIDS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=p0Y7yjxJVlc[/youtube]

1. NFL: Buffalo Bills @ Baltimore Ravens (Sunday 1pm from M&T Bank Stadium live on CBS)

You almost feel bad making fun of the Buffalo Bills. I mean, hasn’t that group of fans suffered enough? They might lose their team to Canada! CANADA! I sorta just feel bad for them.

Oh well.

I present to you the Top 3 most significant moments in Buffalo Bills history…

#3 was actually a decent play…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VE1G-Dn7nUs[/youtube]

#2 was a minor miracle…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A2I4_UP8_2M[/youtube]

#1 was…I’m just sorry Bills fans….

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BCHZFwDCNyA[/youtube]

Flexing my mic muscles since 1983…

-G

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