Top 10 Baseball Distractions

November 16, 2010 | Glenn Clark

Honorable Mention: Boxing-Sergio Martinez vs. Paul Williams (Saturday 10pm from Atlantic City live on HBO); NBA: Toronto Raptors @ Washington Wizards (Tuesday 7pm from Verizon Center live on Comcast SportsNet), Washington Wizards @ Boston Celtics (Wednesday 7:30pm from Boston live on Comcast SportsNet), Memphis Grizzlies @ Washington Wizards (Friday 7pm from Verizon Center live on Comcast SportsNet PLUS), Washington Wizards @ Detroit Pistons (Sunday 6pm from Auburn Hills, MI live on Comcast SportsNet); NHL: Buffalo Sabres @ Washington Capitals (Wednesday 7pm from Verizon Center live on Comcast SportsNet PLUS), Washington Capitals @ Atlanta Thrashers (Friday 7:30pm from Atlanta live on Comcast SportsNet & NHL Network), Philadelphia Flyers @ Washington Capitals (Saturday 7pm from Verizon Center live on Comcast SportsNet), Washington Capitals @ New Jersey Devils (Monday 7pm from Newark, NJ live on Comcast SportsNet); Women’s College Basketball: Towson @ Maryland (Thursday 7pm Comcast Center), American @ Maryland (Sunday 2pm Comcast Center); College Field Hockey: NCAA Tournament Final Four-Ohio State @ Maryland (Friday 4:30pm Field Hockey/Lacrosse Complex College Park), National Championship (Sunday 12pm Field Hockey/Lacrosse Complex College Park)

10. Furthur-Phil Lesh & Bob Weir (Wednesday 7:30pm 1st Mariner Arena), Cedric The Entertainer (Saturday 8pm 1st Mariner Arena); Trans-Siberian Orchestra (Thursday 7:30pm Verizon Center); Marcell & The Truth (Thursday 7:30pm Rams Head Live), Reel Big Fish (Friday 8pm Rams Head Live); Rusted Root (Tuesday & Wednesday 8:30pm Rams Head On Stage); Edwin McCain (Thursday 8pm Rams Head On Stage); Playing For Change Band (Sunday 12:30pm Rams Head On Stage); Wiz Khalifa (Thursday 6:30 and 10pm 9:30 Club), Maceo Parker & Karl Denson’s Tiny Universe (Friday 8pm 9:30 Club), Chuck Brown (Saturday 11pm 9:30 Club); Boyz II Men (Tuesday & Wednesday 7:30pm Birchmere); Bob Marley (Wednesday-Sunday DC Improv); Bill Maher (Friday 8pm Hippodrome); Jerry Seinfeld (Friday 7pm & 9:30pm Meyerhoff Symphony Hall); Keith Urban “Get Closer” available in stores/on iTunes (Tuesday); Disney’s “A Christmas Carol” available on DVD/Blu-Ray (Tuesday)

I don’t care if it’s lame to be into TSO. I’m freaking WAY into TSO. And frankly, since when did someone not think I was lame???

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wQNirj6lbGY[/youtube]

Playing For Change may be the coolest concept since the invention of music. Which I believe happened midway through the 20th century when four lads from Liverpool got together. Correct?

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Us-TVg40ExM [/youtube]

You know how college basketball fans always chant “overrated” when they knock off a good team? I’d like to chant “underrated” at a Karl Denson show…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=c1Qj7Hx5KAs[/youtube]

And since my love for TSO has already established me as being lame, I’ll just go ahead and pile on by adding that I freaking DIG Keith Urban like whoa. Yes. Like whoa.

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mldClZq6sSk[/youtube]

9. Thanksgiving Turkey Taste-Off (Saturday 11am Whole Foods Culinary Center Annapolis)

For the record, I have not decided where to go yet for Thanksgiving this year. I mean, the great Tom Clark and Karen Clark will PROBABLY get me, but if you’re willing to offer one of these, I would be more than willing to come to your house and break down the Ravens’ 53 man roster all day…

turducken

(Edit from GMC: Or could someone just bring a turducken by 1550 Hart Rd. one day this week? That would work just as well. Hugs and kisses.)

8. High School Football-MPSSAA Playoffs Regional Finals-4A West: Sherwood @ Gaithersburg (Friday 7pm), 4A North: Patterson @ Urbana (Friday 7pm), 4A South: Eleanor Roosevelt @ Wise (Saturday 1pm), 4A East: Broadneck @ Arundel (Friday 7pm), 3A West: Quince Orchard @ Damascus (Friday 7pm), 3A North: Franklin @ North Harford (Friday 7pm), 3A South: Huntingtown @ Friendly (Friday 7pm), 3A East: Wilde Lake @ River Hill (Friday 7pm), 2A West: South Carroll @ Middletown (Friday 7pm) 2A North: City @ Eastern Tech (Friday 7pm CCBC-Essex), 2A South: Hammond @ McDonough (Friday 7pm), 2A East: Fallston @ Queen Anne’s (Friday 7pm), 1A West: Fort Hill @ Mountain Ridge (Friday 7pm), 1A North: Brunswick @ Western Tech (Friday 7pm CCBC-Catonsville), 1A South: Dunbar @ Forest Park (Saturday 1pm Poly High School), 1A East: Bohemia Manor @ Havre De Grace (Friday 7pm)

You know, I never thought I’d forgive Franklin High School for the Homecoming beatdown they gave my Perry Hall Gators in ’08. BUT…they have EVERY opportunity to regain my love this week.

This man MUST lose.

brinkman

(Edit from GMC: I’m talking about the ass in the back. Not the poor kid in the front. Unless he’s a Steelers fan too. Then count him in.)

Ken Brinkman is the football coach at NHHS, and he brought the Pittsburgh Steelers to Harford County and LAUGHED about it.

He’s an ass, and his Hawks sadly must pay for it. Therefore, GO INDIANS! Scalp the Hawks!

7. Soccer: Team USA @ South Africa (Wednesday 2pm from Cape Town live on ESPN2), MISL-Chicago Riot @ Baltimore Blast (Saturday 7:35pm 1st Mariner Arena); College Soccer: NCAA Tournament-Bucknell/Penn winner @ Maryland (Sunday 5pm Ludwig Field)

And a shoutout to Pete Caringi’s UMBC Retrievers, who open the NCAA Tournament Thursday night at Princeton as well.

As far as this USA/South Africa match is concerned, I’m a bit confused. I mean, all summer I thought we were supposed to secretly be rooting for South Africa. Are we now supposed to hate them?

I’m torn, like Natalie Imbruglia. (Thanks Chad Dukes!)

I mean, how can I root against the country that gave us THIS?!?!?

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ah6i0i7MW4s[/youtube]

6. Auto Racing: NASCAR Ford 400 (Sunday 1pm from Homestead-Miami, Florida live on ESPN)

I know folks are supposed to care about this event because it involves a showdown between Denny Hamlin, Jimmie Johnson and Kevin Harvick in the last race of “The Chase for the Cup.” But of course no one outside of Alabama (not named Rex Snider anyway) actually gives a crap.

Hell, does anyone even know what Cup it is that these dudes are chasing? The Winston Cup? The Nextel Cup? The Piston Cup from “Cars”?

I THINK it’s the Sprint Cup, but honest to God I don’t know that for sure.

In fact, if you told me that the Cup in question was THIS one, I’d probably be apt to believe you…

cupnoodles

5. Pro Wrestling: WWE Survivor Series (Sunday 8pm from Miami live on Pay-Per-View)

Question: What is it that Ashley Valence does for WWE?

ashleyv

Answer: Whatever the hell she wants.

4. Mixed Martial Arts-UFC 123: Quinton “Rampage” Jackson vs. Lyoto Machida (Saturday 10pm from Detroit live on Pay-Per-View); Strikeforce: Challengers (Friday 10pm from Jackson, Mississippi live on Showtime)

You know what I love? I love the fact that Rampage Jackson is an absolute MANIAC and doesn’t even bother trying to hide it from anyone. The dude is certifiably insane, and everyone is just cool with it.

The real question is…would you rather be hit by Rampage Jackson or ran over by a sumo wrestler? Cue Sport Science…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jzYMX_3K_xE[/youtube]

3. College Football: Florida State @ Maryland (Saturday 8pm from Byrd Stadium live on ABC); Arkansas State @ Navy (Saturday 3:30pm from Navy-Marine Corps Memorial Stadium live on CBS College Sports); Hampton @ Morgan State (Saturday 4pm Hughes Stadium)

Credit Thyrl Nelson for this.

I think I’m going to offer former Seminoles LB (and Ravens LB and Dunbar grad) Tommy Polley one of those types of side bets that governors usually put together.

I figured I’d offer him a bushel of crabs, and in return he can offer me…some free shoes!

fsu
(Thanks to Rich in Westminster for the pic!)

2. College Basketball-2K Sports Classic: Maryland vs. Pittsburgh (Thursday 7pm from New York live on ESPN2), Maryland vs. Illinois/Texas (Friday Time TBA from New York live on ESPN2); Central Connecticut State @ UMBC (Saturday 7pm RAC Arena); UMBC @ Loyola (Wednesday 7pm Reitz Arena), Dartmouth @ Loyola (Sunday 12pm Reitz Arena); Coppin State @ Towson (Tuesday 7:30pm Towson Center)

The good news? I already hate Pittsburgh anyway!

Come watch the Terps take on the Panthers from MSG with US on Thursday night! We’ll be hanging out at the Fullerton Pub (and the Down Under Restaurant) for our “Rub Elbows With The Stars” event. We need you to bring out some canned goods, as we’re collecting 1570 cans this holiday season.

Interestingly enough, 1570 might also be the number of points Pe’Shon Howard needs to score to keep the Terrapins in the game Thursday night. And I’m not so certain he won’t…

1. NFL: Baltimore Ravens @ Carolina Panthers (Sunday 1pm from Charlotte live on CBS)

A recommendation…come to Whisky River in the Queen City Saturday for the big WNST Saturday night pep rally. While you’re there you can buy me a drink…or twelve. It will be a good time!

I usually use this space to make fun of the team the Ravens are playing, but the Carolina Panthers? I mean, do I have to rub it in?

Instead, here’s some Eric Church. Enjoy the soothing feeling before this weekend’s asskicking…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lyNdDkspQQo[/youtube]

Flexing my mic muscles since 1983…

-G

Comments on Facebook

Comments are closed.