Top 10 Baseball Distractions

January 31, 2011 | Glenn Clark

Honorable Mention: Boxing-Friday Night Fights: Sergio Mora vs. Bryan Vera (Friday 9pm from Fort Worth, TX live on ESPN2); College Lacrosse Scrimmage: Loyola @ UMBC (Saturday 1pm UMBC Stadium); NHL: Montreal Canadiens @ Washington Capitals (Tuesday 7:30pm from Verizon Center live on Comcast SportsNet),Washington Capitals @ Tampa Bay Lightning (Friday 7:30pm from Tampa Bay live on Comcast SportsNet PLUS & NHL Network), Pittsburgh Penguins @ Washington Capitals (Sunday 12:30pm from Verizon Center live on NBC)

10. Royal Comedy Tour feat. D.L. Hughley & Bruce Bruce (Saturday 8pm 1st Mariner Arena); Citizen Cope (Tuesday 7pm Recher Theatre); Chromeo (Saturday 8pm Sunday 7pm 9:30 Club); Robert Plant & North Mississippi All-Stars (Tuesday 8pm D.A.R. Constitution Hall), Mike Epps (Friday 7:30pm D.A.R. Constitution Hall); Corey Harris (Thursday-Saturday 8pm & 10pm Blues Alley); Tillman Story” available on DVD/Blu-Ray (Tuesday); Matisyahu “Live At Stubbs II” available in stores/on iTunes (Tuesday)

Nothing in the world bothers me more than the fact that I’m missing Clarence Greenwood Tuesday night. I LOVE Citizen Cope…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GFaVnSLKGBY[/youtube]

Robert Plant is Robert Plant. I believe you’ve heard of him…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rVvgWHawlqY[/youtube]

I once was sitting in the front row of a Dave Matthews Band show in Atlanta where the North Mississippi All Stars opened. It was love at first sound…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rjIt-IuLE5U[/youtube]

I don’t know how Matisyahu’s “Live at Stubbs II” will differ from the first one, but if it’s at all similar it will probably be pretty good…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dsFpUW48Tnc[/youtube]

9. The Chocolate Affair (Thursday 6pm M&T Bank Stadium)

I’ll admit that I’m not really much of a chocolate fan. That’s more my girlfriend’s thing. It’s probably good that she won’t be in attendance Thursday night-or she might seriously never come back.

I don’t really need a whole event to celebrate the chocolate I enjoy. I can hold my own “Chocolate Affair” over at Royal Farms any day leading up to Easter.

I just need a Snickers bar, some Reece’s Peanut Butter Cups and about a thousand of THESE…

eggs

8. Golf: PGA Tour Waste Management Phoenix Open (Thursday-Sunday 4pm from Scottsdale, AZ live on Golf Channel)

Look-golf is terrible and impossible to watch on TV or in person. Everyone knows that. It’s completely inarguable. It’s an awful game that no one should ever play and there’s ABSOLUTELY no reason why any human being would EVER watch the thing on TV. There’s less of a reason to watch in person.

Except for when they’re golfing at TPC Scottdale.

You see, the scene at the Phoenix Open…it’s not too bad…

blondes

chicks

gals

And it’s also the home of the 16th hole. It makes watching golf somehow seem LESS unbearable…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zJHVTcnGzcI[/youtube]

7. Women’s College Basketball: NC State @ Maryland (Sunday 12pm from Comcast Center live on Comcast SportsNet)

Sunday is a neat day. While there will be an ACTUAL Super Bowl being played in North Texas; there will be another Super Bowl being played in College Park.

You see, this matchup between the Terps and the Wolfpack is ABSOLUTELY the Super Bowl for an old friend…

debbie

I know the Terrapins already devoured Debbie Yow’s ‘Pack in football; but TRUST ME when I tell you she cares much more about winning this.

No one loves Women’s Basketball (for good reason) more than Debbie Yow.

The rise of the Terps under Brenda Frese might be what she is most proud of from her tenure at Maryland. She’d be more proud to get a win AGAINST Brenda Frese.

This might not mean so much to the casual Maryland fan-but if you’re in the “Debbie is the enemy” group, this one means the most to her.

6. High School Basketball: Perry Hall @ Franklin (Wednesday 6:30pm), Perry Hall @ Towson (Friday 7pm); Glen Burnie @ Meade (Friday 7pm)

I’m torn on Towson High School. On one side, I’ve had a number of interns (including current intern Timmy Hendrix) from Towson and they’ve always always been good.

On the flip side, of all of the Baltimore County public schools-I’ve tended to find that Towson kids can be amongst the most insufferable.

“Oh, Perry Hall? We don’t care about Perry Hall here. Michael Phelps went to Towson. We’re better than you.”

Jerks.

Of course, Towson High School also claims one of the all-time biggest sex symbols in Charm City history…

divine

5. NBA: Washington Wizards @ New Orleans Hornets (Tuesday 8pm from New Orleans live on Comcast SportsNet PLUS), Orlando Magic @ Washington Wizards (Friday 7pm from Verizon Center live on Comcast SportsNet), Atlanta Hawks @ Washington Wizards (Saturday 7pm from Verizon Center live on Comcast SportsNet)

At what point is it considered “cruel and unusual” to keep forcing the ‘Zards to go on the road? I mean, I enjoy the suffering of DC sports fans as much (probably more) than anyone-but this is crazy.

I’m not much of a NBA fan (unless of course we’re talking about the Phoenix Suns), but I do enjoy a good slam dunk. Rudy Gay authored one of those recently…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wtSg_OwSsF0[/youtube]

Yep. That’s a fine slam dunk.

4. College Football: National Signing Day (Wednesday-coverage throughout the day on CBS College Sports & ESPNU); NFLPA Game (Saturday 2pm from San Antonio live on CBS College Sports)

You may remember the NFLPA Game as the former “Texas vs. The Nation” game.

I mean, I’m well aware that you don’t; I’m just making conversation. Ease off already.

National Signing Day is weird because you get really excited about players who may or may not ever make ANY impact at the college level.

Remember Penn State (later Towson)’s Antonio Logan-El spurning Glorida Friedgen at the ESPNZone in the Inner Harbor live on ESPNews? Not so pissed off about that anymore, are we?

loganel

Attention Nittany Lions fans (including WNST’s own Ashley Bishoff and my cousin Jeff Clark-both of whom I still tolerate despite their poor school choice): YOU DESERVED THAT PIECE OF GARBAGE.

That is all.

3. Mixed Martial Arts: UFC 126-Anderson Silva vs. Vitor Belfort (Saturday 10pm from Las Vegas live on Pay-Per-View)

My new favorite fighter Jon “Bones” Jones (brother of Ravens DT Arthur Jones) is on the card Saturday night. That will about explain who I’ll be rooting for.

Since we’re all here talking MMA, it’s been awhile since I posted a picture of Gina Carano. Might as well change that now…

carano

2. College Basketball: Duke @ Maryland (Wednesday 9pm from Comcast Center live on ESPN), Wake Forest @ Maryland (Saturday 1pm from Comcast Center live on ACC Network-WNUV 54 in Charm City); Georgia State @ Towson (Saturday 4pm Towson Center); Binghamton @ UMBC (Thursday 7:30pm RAC Arena)

This is going to come as a surprise to a lot of folks, but I don’t care for Coach K or the Blue Devils.

In fact, I think four particular future Mrs. Glenn Clark’s happen to explain it best…

duke

1. NFL: Super Bowl XLV-Green Bay Packers vs. Pittsburgh Steelers (Sunday 6:30pm from Arlington, TX live on FOX), WNST Super Bowl XLV Coverage (Tuesday-Friday 6am & 2pm from Dallas live on AM1570 & WNST.net)

PACKERS PACKERS PACKERS PACKERS PACKERS PACKERS PACKERS PACKERS PACKERS PACKERS PACKERS PACKERS PACKERS PACKERS PACKERS PACKERS PACKERS PACKERS PACKERS PACKERS PACKERS PACKERS

Understood?

And if those A-holes from the Steel City win, we all gather together for tequila shots Monday morning.

Flexing my mic muscles since 1983…

-G

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