Top 10 Baseball Distractions

February 14, 2011 | Glenn Clark

Honorable Mention: Golf-PGA Tour Northern Trust Open (Thursday & Friday 3pm live on Golf Channel, Saturday & Sunday 3pm live on CBS. All golf from Pacific Palisades, CA), Champions Tour ACE Group Classic (Friday & Saturday 6:30pm, Sunday 7pm from Naples, FL live on Golf Channel), Honda LPGA Thailand (Friday 12:30pm, Saturday & Sunday 3pm from Chonburi, Thailand live on Golf Channel); High School Basketball: Parkville @ Perry Hall (Wednesday 6:30pm); Boxing: Friday Night Fights-Fernando Guerrero vs. Saul Roman (Friday 7pm from Wicomico Civic Center live on ESPN2), Fernando Montiel vs. Nonito Donaire (Friday 9:45pm from Las Vegas live on HBO)

10. Salt-N-Pepa/Naughty By Nature/MC Lyte/Kool Moe Dee/Kurtis Blow (Saturday 8pm 1st Mariner Arena); Plain White T’s/Parachute (Friday 7pm Rams Head Live); Taproot (Saturday 6:30pm Bourbon Street); Vusi Mahlasela (Monday 8pm Rams Head On Stage); Slightly Stoopid (Wednesday & Thursday 6:30pm 9:30 Club), Drive-By Truckers (Friday & Saturday 8pm 9:30 Club), Los Lobos (Monday 7pm 9:30 Club); Pablo Francisco (Thursday-Sunday DC Improv); John Mellencamp (Tuesday 7pm D.A.R. Constitution Hall), Avett Brothers (Friday 8pm D.A.R. Constitution Hall); Herb Alpert (Wednesday 7:30pm Birchmere), Bacon Brothers (Saturday & Sunday 7:30pm Birchmere); Big Head Todd & The Monsters (Thursday 8pm Strathmore); Buddy Jewell (Thursday 7pm Severna Park High School)

You’re not going to catch me saying a negative word about Salt, Pepa or Spindarella. They’re strong.

A few weeks ago, I woke up to a video of Dave Matthews Band and Vusi Mahlasela playing “Everyday” in my Hotmail Inbox. I had never heard of Vusi Mahlasela. I immediately wanted to hear more…

John Mellencamp rules. Not much else I can say about that…

I haven’t had a chance to listen much to the Avett Brothers. That’s my mistake…

9. Soccer: MISL-Omaha Vipers @ Baltimore Blast (Friday 7:35pm 1st Mariner Arena), Milwaukee Wave @ Baltimore Blast (Sunday 5:05pm 1st Mariner Arena)

It’s been a long time since I’ve included soccer on the list. So I had to reference Yahoo! Sports’ Dirty Tackle blog to find out what I had missed.

Apparently Wesley Sneijder scored a nifty goal for the Netherlands in a friendly against Austria…

And some dude had his pants fall down while trying to take a picture with Lionel Messi…

8. Mixed Martial Arts: Strikeforce Challengers (Friday 11pm from Cedar Park, TX live on Showtime)

I got to see Strikeforce live for the first time this past Saturday night in New Jersey. With any luck, the smell will come out by  St. Patrick’s Day.

The bad news for Strikeforce is that Fedor Emelianenko-the only fighter Strikeforce had that non-MMA hardcores gave a rip about-was eliminated from their World Heavyweight Grand Prix Tournament.

The good news for Strikeforce is that on Saturday night they also officially announced the return of Gina Carano. I’d like to tell you that I think she’s a good fighter. The reality is that no one knows and even fewer care…


For the record, I tried posting the “Gina Carano is back” video Strikeforce showed on Showtime Saturday night; but it wasn’t up on YouTube yet. It’s a lovely video. Trust me.

7. NHL: Washington Capitals @ Anaheim Ducks (Wednesday 10pm from Anaheim live on Comcast SportsNet), Washington Capitals @ San Jose Sharks (Thursday 10:30pm from San Jose live on Comcast SportsNet), Washington Capitals @ Buffalo Sabres (Sunday 12:30pm from Buffalo live on NBC), Washington Capitals @ Pittsburgh Penguins (Monday 7:30pm from Pittsburgh live on VERSUS)

I know that without Monday Night Football there might be a few more folks interested in checking out the Caps face the Pens in a Winter Classic rematch. I won’t be one of them. I hate the Redskins, I hate the Steelers. So I just don’t care for the hockey teams in those cities either.

BUT…if Penguins goalie Brent Johnson gets in another fight like the one he got into against the New York Islanders the other night…I’d be ALL IN…at least to watch the highlights on SportsCenter or something.

6. Women’s College Basketball: Duke @ Maryland (Thursday 7:30pm Comcast Center), Maryland @ Florida State (Sunday 3pm from Tallahassee, FL live on ESPN2)

Can SOMEONE please manage to figure out a way to beat Duke?!? PLEASE?!?!?

I’ll be in College Park Thursday night to check out the Terrapins women as they do the Lord’s work against the Blue Devils.

Hopefully the spirit of Kristi Toliver will be alive as the Terps battle the Devils…

5. Pro Wrestling: WWE Elimination Chamber (Sunday 8pm from Oakland live on Pay-Per-View)

Yep, the Elimination Chamber is crazy. But I could show you a video of that or I could show you a picture of WWE Diva Kelly Kelly. I mean, what are we really doing here anyway???


4. College Lacrosse: Navy @ Loyola (Saturday 2pm from Ridley Athletic Complex live on AM1570 WNST); Johns Hopkins @ Towson (Saturday 12pm from Unitas Stadium live on ABC2 &; Detroit @ Maryland (Saturday 1pm Byrd Stadium)

And with this, Lacrosse is now REALLY back in Charm City. Sadly, it will only kill a handful of Saturdays during MLB season for me, and there won’t be NEARLY enough weeknight games to avoid baseball altogether-but at least there’s an entertaining outdoor sport to watch.

This is also very awkward because I try to support all of the local teams, but they face off more in lacrosse than they do in any other sport.

So for this week I say “Let’s Go BlueTigerTerpHoundsmen!!!”

3. College Basketball: Maryland @ Virginia Tech (Tuesday 8pm from Blacksburg, VA live on ACC Network-WNUV 54 in Charm City), North Carolina State @ Maryland (Sunday 5:30pm from Comcast Center live on Comcast SportsNet); James Madison @ Towson (Tuesday 7pm Towson Center); UMES @ Morgan State (Monday 9pm from Hill Field House live on ESPNU); Rider @ Loyola (Wednesday 7pm Reitz Arena); Hartford @ UMBC (Saturday 7pm RAC Arena); UMES @ Coppin State (Saturday 4pm Coppin State Physical Education Complex), Delaware State @ Coppin State (Monday 7:30pm Coppin State Physical Education Complex); ESPNU Bracketbusters: VMI @ Morgan State (Saturday 4pm Hill Field House), Loyola @ Towson (Saturday 7pm Towson Center)

Things I feel better about than Maryland’s chances of making the NCAA Tournament:

-The American economy
-The Orioles getting Prince Fielder in the offseason
-Katy Perry finally saying “yes” to one of my date requests
-Seeing a new Chris Farley movie one of these days
-Steve Melewski buying me a beer when Drew Forrester and I do our show in Sarasota
-Duke football getting bowl eligible

I think you know where I’m going here.

But if they figure out a way to beat the Hokies Tuesday night…

2. NBA: All-Star Game (Sunday 8pm from Los Angeles live on TNT), All-Star Saturday Night (Saturday 8pm from Los Angeles live on TNT), T-Mobile Rookie Challenge (Friday 9pm from Los Angeles live on TNT); Washington Wizards @ Orlando Magic (Wednesday 7pm from Orlando live on Comcast SportsNet)

Nine out of ten NBA games are awful as it is, yet somehow the ASG finds a way to be even more awful than that.

I guess the dunk contest has occasionally been watchable…and is certainly the only reason any of us are familiar with names like Harold Miner or Gerald Green. And by “any of us” I mean “I went to Wikipedia and looked up to see who all won dunk contests in the past.”

Seriously, why the hell don’t they just put down trampolines and do the whole contest Slamball-style?!?!?

1. Auto Racing: NASCAR-Gatorade Duels (Thursday 2pm from Daytona, FL live on SPEED), Daytona 500 (Sunday 1pm from Daytona, FL live on FOX)

I wish I cared about NASCAR this week. I know this is a big deal to a handful of folks…I just don’t care. At all.

I’ve tried watching races. I’ve tried going to races. I’ve tried hosting a NASCAR radio show with Donnie Neuenberger (seriously). I’ve tried starting at pictures of Danica Patrick.

None of it worked. I just don’t care. It’s cars racing.

It doesn’t mean any of these aren’t funny…

Flexing my mic muscles since 1983…


(Week of Tuesday, February 15-Monday February 21)